Freddie stood, looking at her, waiting for her to say something; anything.
She didn't say a word. Her reaction wasn't bad, good, or even in between. She just looked Freddie in the eyes. Those beautiful eyes that Freddie had grown to adore looked straight at him, yet the look that they had once given him was not present. Her eyes seemed much colder; they seemed frazzled.
"Sam, I-." Freddie began, putting one arm out and touching Sam's shoulder. She winced at his touch, so he quickly moved away.
"Freddie, this is too much for me. One minute we are enemies, and the next I wake up in a hospital bed and we're in love? You have got to imagine what you would feel like if you were me, Freddie." Sam exclaimed.
Freddie knew she was right. Thinking about the way she must have felt scared Freddie, and it wasn't even happening to him. If he had forgotten that he loved Sam, and she was standing in front of him completely in love, he wouldn't know what to do either.
"Listen, Benson. I don't know what you want from me, but I'm pretty positive it's something that I can't give to you." Sam said, with absolutely no remorse in her tone.
Those words hit Freddie like a ton of bricks. That one sentence that had just came from the lips of the beautiful woman standing in front of him pretty much summed up every one of his worst nightmares, all put together. Freddie wanted her love; he wanted it back to the way they were just a few days ago. He wanted the hugs, the kissed, her calling him baby; he wanted all of that.
But, she couldn't give him that. She couldn't give him any of that. Because in her mind, he was just the dorky kid who was the tech producer for her and her best friend's web show. He was the kid whom she would beat up multiple times every day. He was her punching bag twenty four seven. He wasn't her boyfriend, or even someone who she liked the least bit. He was her friend at most, and she couldn't give him her love, because she didn't remember all the wonderful times they had shared.
Freddie remembered them. Freddie remembered each and every one of them like they were yesterday.
The time outside during the lock in, where he had told her to just put her feelings out there. The time that he was lucky enough to be the one that Sam had feelings for, not Brad.
The time in the mental institution where she had told him she hated him, but a few seconds later that she liked him. The time that he convinced her she was no more insane than she had been her whole life. The time that he had convinced himself that he couldn't love her anymore than he did at that moment; he was wrong.
Then there was the time in the elevator after they had heard Carly talking to Spencer and the crazy chick. The time where both their worlds were shattered and they chose to break up, for a while, until they both grew up; or in Freddie's case, grew down. The time that they had shared their first, "I love you"s. The moment that tore them both completely down for weeks, until they realized that breaking up was stupid.
That led to the time when Freddie asked Sam to be his girlfriend, once again. The time when she said yes, and he'd never wanted anything more; when his life was complete just by having her again.
Looking at Freddie standing there, knowing he was thinking about something, Sam grew angrier. She was never one to cry, though she had before. Usually when she became sad she would get angry, and that was happening.
"Benson, listen. What do you want from me?" Sam asked, hatefully.
Freddie sighed, "I don't want anything from you, I just want you." He said, giving her a look that almost, emphasis on the almost, made her fall for him.
"Well, I'm sorry nub, but you can't have me. I don't know what was going on with my brain before this accident, but I'm sure glad it knocked some sense into me." Sam said, not even caring that what she had just said may have ruined Freddie.
"But, Sam.." Freddie said, as his eyes grew watery. He bit his lip, trying to hold back the tears and be a man, "I love you."
Sam saw his eyes begin to fill with water, which made her cold heart grow a little bit warmer. She didn't love the nub, but she didn't want to see him cry either, so, she lied, "Listen, maybe if we just continue as we normally would, I'll remember. Then we can be together again. Don't be so down, okay, nub?" She said as softly as Sam Puckett could. Freddie nodded and she continued, "Listen, I'm gonna go over to Carly's and get some sleep."
With that, she walked out. No matter how much Freddie tried to convince himself that their story could have a happy ending, he still felt the hurt. If Sam never regained her memory, she would probably never regain her love for him. He had to talk to someone, and the only person he knew of was Carly. So, he pulled out his Pear Phone and sent a text to Carly.
Hey, can you come over?
Sure, give me a few minutes. Spencer got his toe stuck in the couch.
His toe? In the couch?
I'll be there in a minute.
Just as Carly had said, a few minutes later she knocked on Freddie's door.
"Hey." She said, looking down at the ground, knowing what the outcome of Sam and Freddie's conversation from earlier was.
"She doesn't remember. She doesn't love me." Freddie said calmly, throwing his Pear Phone up in the air and catching it repeatedly.
Carly sat down on the couch beside Freddie, trying to be the strong one of the two, and said, "Hey! Just remember, Sam could regain her memory at any time, Freddie."
"I know, but until then I'm screwed. I can't stand seeing her and not being able to hug her, hold her, and I really miss kissing her." Freddie said, stressing the last part.
Carly made a disgusted looking face, "Okay, gross."
Freddie then sat up on his bed and looked seriously at Carly. "But, seriously, Carly. You don't understand. What if Sam never regains her memory? What if she never loves me again?"
Carly paused for a moment and then replied, "Well, I mean, life will go on Freddie."
This made Freddie slightly angry and he raised his voice, "No, Carly. Life won't go on. You don't realize how much I love her. You don't realize how much pain I am in right now. I love her more than anything in this world, even Galaxy Wars." Freddie said, and Carly gasped. He nodded and continued, "Yeah. If she doesn't love me again, I don't know what I will do. I don't want anyone else in the world. I only want Sam."
"Well, I'm sorry. I know I don't know what it's like." Carly said in a soft tone, knowing how hurt Freddie really was. She had never seen him like this before.
"I've just gotta get her back. There's no way around it. I'm gonna make my girlfriend fall for me again." Freddie said, confidently. He was going to try everything he could possibly try to get Sam to fall for him again, even if it meant trying for the rest of his life. Samantha Puckett was the only girl he could imagine himself with, and he wasn't going to let a car accident come between them, if he could help it.
Carly sighed, knowing that the situation could end badly, "Good, Freddie. I know she will remember."
Carly couldn't help but lie. She knew that Freddie loved Sam too much to give up, and she couldn't bear to tear him down anymore than she already had that day.
"Alright, well it's getting pretty late, you should probably head back home Carls." Freddie said, as he yawned, and stuck both of his arms in the air to stretch.
Carly stood up and walked out the door, mumbling a small goodbye to Freddie as she exited. She quickly ran over to her apartment, hoping that Sam was awake so that she could talk to her. They hadn't gotten a chance to talk very much since the accident, Sam had been with Freddie most of the time. Carly needed to explain a few things to Sam, that might help out the Freddie situation.
When she opened the door, she saw Sam sitting on the couch. She mentally jumped for joy and ran over to her.
"Well, hello to you too." Sam chuckled as Carly planted herself firmly on the couch beside Sam.
"I missed you so much." Carly said, looking over at her best friend.
Sam smiled, "Thanks Carls." The two sat in silence, the same thing that had happened to Sam with different people multiple times that same day. To break the awkward silence Sam said in an emotionless tone, "Freddie showed me the episode of iCarly where we kissed."
Carly didn't really know what to say so she muttered a quick, "Oh, really?"
"Yeah I mean, I just can't believe that happened." Sam said as she stared off into space.
Carly laughed and said, "I can. I always knew you and Freddie would get together, I knew you two couldn't be at each other's throats forever."
"Yeah, but I thought the nub was in love with you." Sam said as she stared in the same direction she had been staring. Her eyes were beginning to burn from not blinking for so long.
Carly just shook her head. "That's over, Sam. Freddie had a little crush on me when we were younger-"
"Uh-huh. If by little crush you mean he was completely in love with you." Sam interrupted, placing air quotes around the words little crush.
Carly sighed, "Okay, fine. He was a little obsessed with me. But that's not the point!" Carly said, raising her voice and getting a little excited at the last part. "Freddie wasn't in love with me, he just had a crush. When you two started dating, he fell in love with you. Trust me, Sam, the boy told me enough times." Sam looked pretty grossed out, so trying to help the situation Carly continued, "And, even if you don't want to believe it, you were in love with him too, Sam."
Sam covered her ears and shook her head, "No, no. I am not in love with Freddork." Then she proceeded to stick one finger in her mouth and pretend to gag.
"Say whatever you want, Sam. I know the truth. I am your best friend and I know you better than anyone in the world. I know for a fact that you were in love with Freddie." Carly argued.
Sam grunted, "Ugh, stop saying that. It makes me want to throw up on fifty-seven kittens."
Carly raised one eyebrow at Sam's last remark but shook it off. "I'm not kidding, Sam. You told me that you loved him more than ham one time."
Sam gasped, "How dare you use those blasphemous words? Mama don't love nothing more than her ham."
"Yeah, she does, and it's a certain brown-haired tech producer for iCarly." Carly exclaimed, using her normal Carly voice. Sam began to walk away. "Hey, don't you walk away from me Puckett! You know you love Freddie!"
As Sam exited the room she waved her hand in the air and said, "Not a chance, Shay."
Freddie laid on his bed and looked up at the ceiling to the glow in the dark stars that his mother had put up when he was younger. He remembered the times when he and Sam would lay there, looking up at them, and talk about their future.
Sam would never want to commit to anything, when Freddie talked about marriage she would quickly change the subject. She had damage, but Freddie didn't mind. That didn't stop him from telling her every chance he got that he wanted to spend forever with her. She would never reciprocate, but it was okay.
Laying in his cold bed alone, he realized how empty the world felt when he didn't have Sam. He didn't have the warmth in his heart that he usually felt just knowing that she was his. It was gone, along with all the happiness he felt. Now he felt nothing but sadness, and loneliness.
He suddenly turned over to his side; and as if the whole world was mocking him, lit through the darkness, he saw a picture of him and Sam sitting on his bedside table. It was a picture of them kissing. Freddie had protested when Sam got the idea, and frankly it surprised him that Sam would even get that idea, but he took the picture anyway. Anything to please her was always his motto.
He turned to his other side to try and avoid looking at the reminders of Sam, because now he didn't even have the chance to please her.
He couldn't understand why something like this had to happen to them. Why did something have to ruin their near perfect relationship? Okay, saying it was near perfect was a little farfetched. Their relationship was far from perfect, but it was perfect for them. They needed each other to balance themselves out. Sam would loosen Freddie up a little bit when he was being too uptight, and Freddie would calm Sam down when she got too out of hand. It was a perfect balance, and even though they were so totally different, they fit together in more ways than one.
When the thought of Sam got to be too much for Freddie, he pulled his covers up to his shoulders and closed his eyes. The next thing he knew, he was in a peaceful sleep, dreaming of Sam.
When he woke up in the morning, he sat up in his bed to see someone standing at his doorway, looking at him.
The person mumbled, "Um, hey."
Well, well, well. I wonder who the person might be, I bet y'all will never guess :P
No, but really, thank you all for the reviews for the last chapter, I really appreciated them.
Thank you for reading this, I hope you liked it :)
Maybe you should tell me if you did or not? ;)