Her reason of being cold

When all my comrades are all asleep, I looked at an empty spot beside me. I looked at each and one of my comrades. I noticed the empty spot beside me was my cousin's spot. I stood up and wander around for a moment looking for her. Then at the lake near our campsite, I saw Xena quietly weeping. She was sitting in a log, her hair's covering part of her face, her hands on her cheek wiping each tear that's flowing. I approached her. She noticed my presence and said "It's in the middle of the night. What are you hanging around here for?" I softly smiled knowing she doesn't want me to see her like that. Especially, if you're the princess of hell in the group. She never shared anything to us. She always smirks but doesn't smile. I always saw that hatred and coldness in her eyes that I can't explain. "Like you, I can't sleep. Are you crying? Don't worry I won't tell anybody" I answered. I heard her chuckle. "Yes. Heh. Maybe I can tell you something about me. After all, YOU are my cousin." I saw her turned to me and my eyes widened to what I saw. She smiled at me. For the first time, I didn't saw that coldness in her eyes but the hatred was more powerful than before. I shivered. "Why don't you sit with me?" It was not a question at the same time not an order. I smiled and nodded. As I sat with her, there was an awkward silence then she spoke Do you know why have been so cold toward the others especially boys?" She asked without even looking at me. I stared at her in confusion. Never really knowing what she meant. I watched her as she closed her eyes. I heard her sigh. "You and the others know about my mother and about my father abandoned me. That was just a part of my hatred. Even though I hate to admit it, I'm hurt." I saw her eyes tearing up again. My eyes softened. "I know." She looked at me and I looked at her now surprised orbs. "You're only human. You're also a human Xena. But you don't show those emotions. You bottle up your entire problem to yourself." She looked back at the water. Her eyes are now red and puffy from crying. "I-"I saw her finding the right words to say "I've been in love once." I nodded in understanding. "But I only ended up betrayed." I heard her sniff. I closed my eyes, letting every information sink in my head. She continued to tell me her story. "Ever since that incident, I never have been like that anymore. I never allowed myself to love anyone. I bottle up my problems because I know that nobody in this world will ever listen to what I say" I stood up and extended a hand. She accepted it. "You should not give up on love cousin. And don't worry. I will listen to you. So starting now, don't bottle your feelings" She smirked. "I already did. And thanks I will do that" I saw her walked away from me. I never thought of a one sided love could be so painful. When we woke up next morning, I saw my cousin twitch in annoyance as Reaper started to annoy her again. I smiled. I guess we're back in being cold.