This is one of the many times when my inability to write smut gets in the way.


Once upon a time, in the town of Mysterious Mystic Falls, there lived a girl called Sexy Red Heels Caroline. One day, Sexy Red Heels Caroline's Mother-Figure Bonnie told Sexy Red Heels Caroline that she had some chores for her; she had to go to her Grandmother-Figure Elena's home to give her some herbs.

Sexy Red Heels Caroline, who was known for her Sexy Red Heels (and her openness, but that was irrelevant here) pulled on her Sexy Red Heels, got the basket of herbs for her Grandmother-Figure Elena, and traipsed off.

"But remember, Sexy Red Heels Caroline, to beware the Big Bad Hybrid and all wolves." Her Mother-Figure Bonnie called out behind her, for to get to Grandmother-Figure Elena's home, Sexy Red Heels Caroline had to cross the Scary Salvatore Forest in which lived the Big Bad Hybrid. Sexy Red Heels Caroline had no idea how the Big Bad Hybrid looked (nor did anyone, for that matter) but it was common knowledge that he was of the shape of a wolf.

"Yes, Mother-Figure Bonnie!" She called out and then skipped into the Scary Salvatore Forest.

Inside Scary Salvatore Forest, Sexy Red Heels Caroline saw some very pretty flowers and decided to pick them for her Grandmother-Figure Elena, who liked pretty flowers. So she stopped and bent over, picking some of the many flowers that grew in the forest.

Suddenly, she heard someone say, "Hello." Sexy Red Heels Caroline turned around, prepared to throw flowers if it was the Big Bad Hybrid, but it wasn't; it was a man. A very nice looking man.

"Hey," She responded, smiling at him, both her hands clutching her basket.

"What is your name?" He asked, and she noticed that his voice had a lilt nothing like her own. It was nice, of course.

"Sexy Red Heels Caroline." She said, giving him a sultry smile. He stared at her Sexy Red Heels for a second before nodding in approval and replying, "I am Niklaus." She was about to giggle because that was what she did, when all of a sudden a giant wolf leapt towards them.

Sexy Red Heels Caroline gasped. The Big Bad Hybrid! But Niklaus turned around, grabbed the wolf by the scruff of it's neck and threw it away. Like it was a puppy. Sexy Red Heels Caroline could feel pooling in her face and other places as she exclaimed; "Oh, Niklaus, you saved me from The Big Bad Hybrid!"

He shot her a smirk which made her blush harder. He was so nice.

"Would you like to help me pick flowers for my Grandmother-Figure Elena?" She asked, and his face fell.

"I'm afraid I have to leave, but we will meet again." He said, and she nodded and watched him walk away, then went right back to picking flowers for her Grandmother-Figure Elena.

Once she had enough flowers, she continued on to her Grandmother-Figure Elena's home, knocking on the door. From inside she heard a squeaky "Come in," and entered, finding her Grandmother-Figure Elena lying on the sofa, a blanket covering only her legs.

Not her bare torso.

Or her muscular arms.

"Oh, Grandmother-Figure Elena, what a toned chest you have." She squeaked out, solely because that is how the story goes.

"All the better to turn you on with, my darling." She swallowed. Oh, she was turned on.

"Oh, Grandmother-Figure Elena, what muscular arms you have." She continued, and he stood up, the blanket remaining around his legs and hips (Thank God?)

"All the better to carry you to my bed with, my darling." He crooned and she allowed him to, swallowing some more.

"Oh, Grandmother-Figure Elena," she squeaked. "What soft-looking lips you have." He smirked down at her.

"All the better to ravish you with, Sexy Red Heels Caroline." And then she might have tried to speak, but she couldn't because his mouth was completely covering hers and rendering her brain effectively dead.

Sexy Red Heels Caroline was well known for her openness (and her Sexy Red Heels, though that was only a little irrelevant here) and now in specific she was feeling very open, which might explain the state of her legs.

"Sexy Red Heels Caroline? Are you alright? Is it the Big Bad Hybrid?" She heard the worried voice of the younger Salvatore, Stefan Salvatore, who was the less scary of the Scary Salvatores, as her moans started coming.

"Oh, yes." She moaned, then scrambled to hide under the blanket as he entered the door.

"Leave." Niklaus the Big Bad Hybrid growled and Stefan-Not-Scary-Salvatore looked at her. "Yes, leave." She growled too, and then threw one of her Grandmother-Figure Elena's pillows at him.

"Alright," Stefan-Not-Scary-Salvatore said and left.

Then Sexy Red Heels Caroline and Niklaus the Big Bad Hybrid lived happily ever after in his house (he carried her there with his muscular arms).

The End.


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