Hey guys! Thank you so much for your reviews/subscriptions/alerts! They mean a lot, especially since I always do Eclare...and I'm glad that my readers support me doing something a bit different. Now, you guys will be having a bit of Adam on your plate today ;) Please enjoy the second one-shot secret I'd like to call 'Give Your Heart A Break'...
No Beta Reader, so ignore mistakes :)
Rated M: Self harm talk/Adam heartbreak feelings/Looking down at God
This chapter is dedicated to people who suggested an Adam chapter: Rawr Olivia Grace , RRsabi , Mrs Ricardo Justin Hoyos Kelly ,
Day after day, sunrise after sunset, Adam's life has always been a struggle.
He's not quite sure if this is God's intentions, although, his friend Clare always tries to convince him that what happens to him happens for a reason.
But what reasons?
Is God so cruel that he'd give Adam a boys brain in the body of a girl? Does he even care about the constant physical struggle Adam has in trying to fit in with the guys of Degrassi? The boy in the beenie smirks, betting all the money in the world that God's sitting up in heaven in his chair, looking all high and mighty, laughing down upon him.
Sometimes he wonders how long he's going to last with the constant need to compete with society.
Being a female to male transgender isn't easy, nor is it something he would ever wish for upon his worst enemy.
Eli and Clare are the only two people in my life who have really accepted the fact of who he is-who he needs to be. Adam's mother, sure she tells him she accepts it, and sure Drew calls him his 'little bro', but he's stopped believing. Adam refuses to believe his family because he knows they're all two-faced, and they're all out to break him.
"I like that you're the best of both worlds. Boyish and girlish."
Adam flinches, reminiscing of his glassy eyed ex-girlfriend; how she stared at him with no emotion, nor care. He distinctly remembers the feeling of pure jealousy towards his best friends. They were so in love at the time-still are-but they were reaching their peek, smiles all around. But Adam, a smile could only be forced for the moment.
"Dinking makes it easier."
All Adam ever wanted was a girl to embrace his condition, and love him no matter what. He only desired a hug, or a shoulder squeeze, to let him know everything would be okay. But no, that was the last thing he had received from Fiona Coyne.
Instead of his wish coming true, he was confronted with the emotional tears and shattering of his heart. He had tried so hard to impress Ms. Coyne, and to keep her pleased. Although Adam knew she was out of his league, with a little convincing from Eli and Clare, he pushed himself to get out there.
What a mistake that was.
What became of their relationship was what seemed like endless tears and sobs. No one had comforted Adam at home. Drew ignored the hysterics coming from the bunk bed above him, and mama Torres just sighed dramatically from outside the door, knowing life would be so much easier if Adam was just Gracie. If Adam was Gracie, he would be able to get boys to like her, and Audra believed that no heartbreak would occur.
But it was too late-Adam was Adam, why couldn't they just accept it?
Letting Fiona go was one of the most heart wrenching things Adam has ever done in his life. He loved her, he needed her, and he embraced her for who she was-an alcoholic.
He tried-oh Adam tried to convince her to put the bottle down, and to enjoy life for what it was. But she was too far into the dark abyss, too far in for him to save her from drowning.
I mean honestly, how can you revive a person if they aren't breathing anymore?
Adam Torres had picked up a dirty habit along the struggle to sanity-burning, cutting, and even shoving his hand in a boiling pot of water at desperate times. That was all in progress, until Clare Edwards had caught sight of Adam, wearing girl clothing, tears streaming down his face, with a flame underneath a hair clip. However, when Clare and Adam had locked eyes, the searing noise filled the air, before he threw the use of harm onto the table.
He expected shouting, or ridicule, but no-she accepted him, she smiled, she rubbed his arm, and hugged him.
That was all it took-just one simple act of kindness, and care, for Adam to stop hurting himself.
Although he could never blame Fiona or Katie, or Bianca ...or anyone who he has ever liked for that matter, for his own actions, he still felt the gut wrenching guilt taking over his body.
That is, until he laid eyes on the quirky, awkward, nostril-tampon filled girl.
His heart felt light, and as if his feet weren't touching the ground anymore. She intrigued him from afar, making him smile. It was the first time his smile wasn't forced in a long time, and he wasn't going to question it.
God had put her there, in that hallway, in that specific time frame for a reason-to make him smile.
Adam's mind did get the best of him for a minute or so, eyeing her perfect body, and the angelic glow to her bloody face. He analyzed the way her blue striped shirt was roughed up a bit, revealing a bit of skin.
Instead of doing the usual Adam Torres, and falling head over heels for a girl he only glanced at, he stood on the sidelines this time. He knew he wasn't ready for getting back out there, or even trying to be a friend to the girl...he didn't want to-he couldn't, not this time.
Adam was broken-too broken.
So instead of damaging himself any further, causing anymore harm to his own being, he just smiled back. In a split second, he had changed, because he saw one thing that gave him a bit of hope-a smile in return.
My name is Adam Torres, and I'm giving my heart a break.
So you got a little Fadam...a little Eclare/Misfits talk...a little Imogen/Adam in there. I basically tried to ram all of your guys' requests for Adam in one, so hopefully you liked it!
I just wanted to show that Adam hasn't been with anyone since Fiona, or liking Katie, and the reason was-he had to give his heart a break ;)
Love you guys,
P.S. Keep sending in your requests if you have any! I will do all of them! :D