TDE: Surfer Love
Naruto x Bridgette
If I got the teams mixed up slightly, it's because I'm used an early chapter team rotation from Total Drama Extreme. Mainly because I forgot to record changes for the branch off chapters.
It was another morning and everyone was going about their business. Geoff and Duncan were pranking Harold. Heather hogging up all the hot water while the island's new couple were going for a walk. "Attention all campers, for the next challenge you're to report your sorry asses to the Dock at 0900!" For a brief momentthe campers stopped what they were doing.
"That's new," Naruto commented as he and Bridgette came to a stop under one of the loud speakers. They had just came from the beach where they watched the surprisingly still their sharks feed on the tossed away remain of Chef's cooking where moments later they floated belly side up.
Some of the campers though weren't aware of Military Time and Chef saw this over the camera system. "THAT MEANS NOW TROOPERS NOW!"
After all the campers got dressed they arrived at the Dock of Shame. The intimidating cook was dressed in a military Uniform. Whipping out a uniform he announced, "Line up and stand at attention. YOU CALL THIS A FORMATION!?" One by one he whipped particular campers with a whip as he corrected their stances. "FEET TOGETHER! EYES FORWARD! CHIN UP!"
Gwen whispered to Trent, "Oh this is going to be a fun day." She sarcastically remarked.
Chef turned to her, "WHAT DID YOU SAY SOLIDER?!"
Gwen gulped, shifting her eyes as she nervously stammered, "Um…nothing."
"AND YOU WILL CONTINUE TO SAY NOTHING UNTIL I TELL YOU TO SAY SOMETHING!" He blared over the bullhorn. "TODAY'S CHALLENGE WILL NOT BE AN EASY ONE! IN FACT I DON'T EXPECT YOU ALL TO COME OUT ALIVE! MY ORDERS ARE TO MAKE SURE ALL THE SAPS IN FRONT OF ME DROP OUT EXCEPT FOR ONE! THE LAST ONE WINS IMMUNITY FOR THEIR TEAM!"
Chef grinned, "GOOD! NOW THE CHALLENGE CAN HAVE ANYONE DROP OUT AT ANY TIME UNTIL IT COMES DOWN TO ONE CAMPER. THE SOLE SURVIVING CAMPER WILL WIN INVINCIBILITY FOR THEIR TEAM! FOR THIS CHALLENGE YOU WILL REFER TO ME AS GRAND MASTER CHIEF! UNDERSTOOD?!"
"YES GRAND MASTER CHEF!" The campers announced. And with that Chef went over the following rules. Those who could no longer do on would go to the Dock of Shame and rang the bell. They would only eat what he told them to eat and the day would not end unless one person dropped out.
Meanwhile with Douchebag and Asshole. "You know, I figure this be your kind of thing." Chris remarked as he and Kuiinshi sat in lawn chairs, eating popcorn.
"Yeah well, I'm trying to stick with this whole, only one angry black man at time thing these reality shows tend to have and I figure it was Chef's turn. I mean, bullshitting these campers take a lot of work."
"Pass the skittles if you wouldn't mind my good man."
"Bitch, go get your own skittles."
Meanwhile at the Confession Cam."I have to say, whoever sick, twisted idea it was to put Chef in charge of the challenge, I have to say, I'm a little impressed." Gwen confessed to the camera.
Down at the Beach two canoes were waiting for the teams.
"Listen up, for the first part of this challenge, you are to hold these canoes over your head. Both hands must remain on the canoes at all times and if I catch you, you will be eliminated. No one eats lunch until someone is eliminated. Canoes up!"
The teams then proceeded to pick up the canoes and held them above their heads.
Trent smiled, "This isn't that hard."
Geoff smiled back. "Yeah piece of cake."
Naruto groaned, "Are you freaking kidding me? Did they really just blatantly jinx us like that?" he thought. Over three hours had passed and there were signs of weakness. People were getting hungry, others were losing strength in their arms.
"Come on you sissies! It's only been three hours!" Chef taunted them as Chris and Kuiinshi arrived on the scene.
"Looks like they'll miss lunch today." Chris remarked as he began eating some Twizzlers.
"Come on guys, you know it's not healthy to skip meals." K remarked as he began eating a pastrami sandwich.
"You know K, this is the reason why Sister Agatha's fate was shaken. Not just any person could drive a nun to pray for a person to go to hell." Naruto remarked as the man simply shrugged his shoulders.
"Hey she's compromising her soul not mine." The bickering and snipping went on for another hour before Kuiinshi left to go eat or hit on some of the interns or something of that nature. Soon nightfall came and the moon was out.
Several of the campers were starting to grow tired, noticeably Gwen as Chef began narrating a story of his past. "Twenty-five of us went into that jungle…only five of us came out."
"I…I can't do this anymore!" Lindsay finally gave up. She had lost all feelings in her arm, even going as far as using her head to ding the bell. Both teams heaved off their canoes and nearly collapsed in relief.
Chef went over to Lindsay, patting her on the back. "Listen, you've got nothing to be ashamed of."
Lindsay raised her head up, a look of relief on her face. "Really?"
"BESIDES THE FACT THAT YOU LET YOUR WHOLE TEAM DOWN!" He proceeded to yell into her face, causing her to fall over. "The rest of you! DINNER IS SERVED!"
When they arrived to the Mess Hall the glorious dinner they were expecting (Even Chef's usual slop was looking appetizing at the moment) they found themselves with trash cans. It didn't help they were told they only had ten minutes until night training kicked in.
"What's wrong Princess? Don't care for today's special!"
"I am going to be running for office one day! And NO ONE is going to be pulling up a profile of me eating Garbage!"
Some things never changed. Duncan and Courtney, sniping at each other which strangely enough became more frequent a few days ago. The only person brave enough to ration from it was Eva. Several campers made it no secret how disgusting they found it.
"They must be out of their minds if they think I'm going to eat garbage," Heather hmpped and walked away.
"Hey Bridge, I got some doubled package and sealed food with our names on it." Naruto whispered into the surfer girl's ears.
"But isn't that cheating? What if we're caught?" she whispered back to the blond.
"Let's just say the moment Chef said we'd eat what he tell us I figure something like this would happen. He didn't say it had to be stuff we put or it had to be these specific trash-cans. Just that 'trash' was our meal."
"What about the others?"
"Too suspicious to take too many of us. I'll make it up to them later."
Bridgette was about to argue when her stomach let out a rather ferocious girl. Her face burned red and she looked away, covering it with her hand, feeling rather mortified at the moment. Naruto merely chuckled and placed a kiss on the side of her neck, causing her to squeak. The last thing the couple saw was Eva 'insisting' that DJ eat to keep his strength up and the Jamaican looking for help among his fellow campers who were busy with other things.
The so called next challenge that they needed their strength for, a 300 word essay of why they loved Master Chief. The numbers continued to dwindle down until it was Naruto, Courtney, Geoff, Bridgette, and Duncan for the foxes while. Heather, Gwen, Leshawna, Eva, and Trent for the Gophers. Their next challenge, an Obstacle. "ALRIGHT MAGGOTS LISTEN UP! YOUR NEXT CHALLENGE IS THE MOST HAZARDOUS TRAINING COURSE ON THIS SIDE OF THE HEMISPHERE! YOU WILL ALL RUN THIS COURSE UNTIL YOU CAN COMPLETE IT IN ONE MINUTE! THOSE WHOLE FAIL TO DO SO WILL BE ELIMINATED! ANY QUESTIONS?" None of the campers asked anything, not falling for the bait to whatever verbal abusive response Chef had in store. "WELL WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!? AN INVITATION! GO MAGGOTS GO!"
Half an hour in campers started to drop. Leshawna began sinking into the mud thanks to her wait. Harold had to be sent to the infirmary after taking in too much mud, and Heather found herself being tangled up by the ropes, which somehow ensnared her leg and had her hanging upside. Even Eva, who thanks to her muscular size found herself stuck in the wheel makeshift wall.
"YOU JUST EARNED YOURSELF TWENTY MORE PUSH-UPS!" Chef bellowed at Duncan who all day challenged the man's authority and was making a joke of things.
"Thank you!' and of all things he pecked Chef's nose. This last sign of insubordination sent Chef into unintelligible fury.
"I think you may have pushed him over the edge bro!" Geoff pointed out.
Duncan, for the first time that day became rather uncertain. "I…think you're right."
"One night, solitary confinement," he spoke in an eerily calm and normal tone. "In the boat house." Several of the campers, even Heather gasped once the punishment was revealed.
"Big whoop! How scary can it be?" Duncan soon lamented the fact he should have kept quiet upon arriving to the very sharp and dangerous shack. The challenge finally came to an end when it came to the limit of how long the campers could be allowed to run the course. After all, they had to be fresh and attentive enough for the following challenges so the show could get could ratings. It was all about the ratings after all.
"You're probably wondering why I called you all here." Naruto began with a dramatic flair.
"Well done Einstein, brilliant deduction. Want to read our palms next?" Heather heckled from the back. The next thing she knew she found herself dodging a kunai. "What the hell is the matter with you?! You almost hit me, and is that a knife!" she screamed as Naruto tapped his chin, a faraway look in his eye.
"Hhm," he suddenly came back to reality. "Sorry about that, I was having a flashback." He merely added with a cheeky grin. "Now, I'm sure we've all heard of the expression, my enemy of my enemy is my friend. This is one of those times where we must banned together. I say we sneak into the kitchen and elaborate the good food.
Trent raised a brow, "hold on, Chef'll be watching that place like a hawk."
"On contraire music man. I've done some scouting and about this time he's out with Chris somewhere, eating steak or some other measure of meal."
"And you're sure about that? Absolutely sure?" Gwen questioned with a raised eyebrow. The blond was rather trustworthy, that much she knew when they were team mates for a short time, but that didn't mean she wouldn't be suspicious of his motivations. What could he gain from feeding the enemy team as well?"
"Yes, and if you're wondering why I invited you Gophers, it's rather simple. Extra Meat shields in the case of being caught." He simply explained. Some murmuring occurred among the campers, but they all accepted the reasoning. It was a simple sneak in and sneak out mission, no worry about traps or anything as Chris was not the kind of guy with the ability to evade traps and stuff.
Everyone happily stuffed their faces with all matter of food, knowing that the chances of them eating good like this again was none-existent. Suddenly Chef's voice blared over the system. "Boot Camp recruits! The next evolution of your training beings tomorrow morning at 0700 hours. And if I catch the sucker that took my desert your ass is mine!"
The seven remaining campers hung upside down on tree branches by their legs while being given instructions. "What you are experiencing is an ancient form of torture. By now the blood has begun rushing to your head. The next stage is nausea. Followed by dizziness and a flushed appearance as the blood begins to pool into your eyes. You may experience fainting spells…" And just like that Duncan collapsed onto the ground. One by one the other campers began to fall off. Heather giving up because of Eva's strong musk bothering her, and Geoff becoming so wussy he fell right off. That left Naruto and Courtney versus Gwen and Eva. At this moment Naruto really wished Izzy didn't land on her head after deciding to clear the wall in a single bound because she was getting bored with doing the course over and course again. So he formed an idea. "Anyone want to hear a joke?" he asked, not waiting for a response.
"Okay, A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?"
A few days go by, and he comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?"
He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard.
The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The next day the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls.
Wife says: "Nothing. He said he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or slept with him."
"Uh, well, what kind of cake did you make?" asks the husband.
"What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"
Unfortunately Naruto's joke backfired and he ended up sending Courtney tumbling over. He didn't know whether to be stupefied that the joke worked in some capacity or that it was Courtney of all people that fell for it. "That is…so terrible." She said in between her bouts of laughter.
"You won't win this time foxboy! I train for this kind of thing! I could do this for days! In fact I have once, one day, fourteen hours and twenty minutes. Would have been longer if my idiot cousin Raymond didn't shoot me with his paintball gun." The sound of a cracking branch interrupted Eva's story.
"Aaw crap!" Gwen muttered as the branch soon gave away from the prolonged stretch of weight. Both women were sending tumbling down to the ground.
"Wooo! Team Fox for the win!" Naruto cheered. "Man, I haven't felt this proud since I recreated Luigi wins by doing nothing in sprite format."
"THE FOXES ARE THE WINNERS! SERIOUSLY GOPHERS! AREN'T YOU TIRED OF HEARING THAT!?"
Chris chuckled at this. "Man, I was kind of expecting you guys to throw some stuff at him or something. Disappointed that you guys didn't try to interfere."
"What the hell! Heather angrily exclaimed. "Why didn't you tell us that?"
"Because its much funnier to tell you guys afterwards to see how pissed off you get." Kuiinshi explained. "Hi, my name is Kuiinshi and his is Chris. We're ass-holes, have we met?" The foxes merely cheered as the Gophers would once more found themselves at the Bon-Fire pit.
Next chapter a surprising elimination comes to light along with some Naruto x Bridgette filler.