I am so incredibly pleased that you're finally gone. Yeah. Good fucking riddance. Oh, what's that? Light-kun shouldn't curse? For fucks sake man, that's one thing I wont miss, your constant nagging. Light-kun shouldn't do this, Light-kun should do that, this isn't healthy, that isn't proper- and what a hypocrite you are! (were. Cause you're not anymore, you're not anything anymore.) Correcting me about health and manners, while your habits are the worst I've ever seen.
Your diet alone, dear god that's gross. And why in the world don't you gain weight? I mean didn't. Yes, day after day by your side was sheer mental torture, but I went through it, and in the end, I showed you, didn't I?
Yes L, it was nothing but a trick.
There you have it, I tricked you. I tricked you into thinking you meant something to me. I tricked you into thinking I loved you. Hah. I had them all fooled, everybody. In the end, I nearly even fooled myself into thinking I did.
You see Ryuuzaki, I knew I would never be able to convince you I wasn't Kira. You just knew, and you were too intelligent to ever think anything else. No, I would never be able to convince you of my innocence, and as long as you were on my tail like this, I would eventually get caught.
One would, perhaps, expect this information to upset me. Or at least freak me out a little. That stupid shinigami came to me with a smirk, asking me what I planned to do now. As if this really changed anything. The thing is, L, that I was simply happy there was finally something more challenging going on.
I simply knew I'd have to do something drastic. Something difficult. Something immensely dangerous. Then again, what part of being Kira wasn't all that?
It wasn't easy. Not in the least. It was probably the hardest thing I'd ever done, and the most important thing was to constantly remind myself this was all for the plan. That it was a lie everyone but me would have to believe. As I got to know you more and more, as I found out you're afraid of lightning, but too attached to being your ideal of justice to show it, that you dislike the colour yellow, and that you're more attached to cute things than you'd like.
I learned that unlike what everyone thinks, you're not at all apathetic. In fact, you care so very, very much, it wounded you to the core on a daily basis. I found out that although you had always known I was Kira, you had also always seen me as your only friend, and that that hurt you more than anything else. I discovered that the reason you barely ever sleep is because when you do, you're so haunted by nightmares you tremble and shake, curled up in silent agony.
We were never a normal couple, even after I wooed you, and got you to believe I loved you. After all, I needed you to believe that I was utterly torn up, since my loved one was also my biggest enemy.
The first time we slept together was when I had orchestrated for me to fully realize how much I 'loved' you. I broke down in tears, chest heaving, not saying a word, since I still never admitted my being Kira, but I knew you knew what was bothering me. What I pretended was bothering me, I mean. I knew you knew neither of us would ever back down, no matter how much Light and Ryuuzaki were involved, no matter how much they needed one another. L and Kira had started a game, and they were going to finish it.
Your hand reached for my shoulder, causing me to flinch. (Because I still found it disgusting to touch you, of course, and humiliating to cry in front of you, not because I was scared of just how much I craved your touch. At all.) Before I knew it my face was pressed against your chest though, arms wrapped securely around me, holding me against your lithe, underfed body nearly protectively. My eyes widened slightly as your trembling gave away you were crying too.
We lied together the entire night, sobbing without a sound, holding onto each other as if the other would vanish as soon as the direct contact was broken for just a second. As if both of us knew fully well this was going to end really, really bad.
I told myself I should be happy. The plan was going great. Even though L had no intention of giving in, his mental state would influence his ability to reason. This was great. Even so, I had to wonder why the tears were genuine, and why I felt sharp pangs of pain as I watched the man, which looked so painfully young now, tremble in my arms, sobbing, scared, hurt.
Time passed, and I learned even more about you.
I learned you made the girly-est little whimpering sounds I ever heard when someone tickles your left foot, and that you really liked mango-raspberry juice. I learned that you hated frogs, yet really liked owls, and that you could be extremely affectionate when no one else was looking, and when you were simply Ryuuzaki, not L.
Time passed, and my plan developed more and more.
Once I bedded you, I knew I had won. I knew it. Because of what I saw in your eyes. That instant, I knew you were utterly and hopelessly in love with me.
It was a stormy night, as I pressed you against the mattress, leaning heavily on top of you, drowning in your sight. You were wearing your normal outfit, of course, the shirt ridden up to reveal quite a large amount of pale, flat stomach, jeans falling low on your hips, the smallest part of dark blue boxer-shorts peeking out. You were watching me, with wide, innocent dark eyes, just watching. I think you looked scared. Your lips were parted, pale as always, like the rest of you, completely white except for the dark circles under even darker eyes, and that mop of delightfully messy hair of yours. I felt something rise within me, and had to temporarily remember myself I was just acting, as I leaned forward, planting a promising kiss on the small patch of skin right below your ear.
Yes. Just as planned.
Very tenderly, as if you were a porcelain doll I could break with the slightest of touches, I kissed you on the lips, sensually, slowly, my tongue fighting its way into the moist cavern of your mouth, as you greeted me with a moan and some resistance, twirling yours around mine in a dance so sinful even the devil would wince, while my hands slowly worked on undressing you, until you were lying stark naked underneath me, and I pulled back to look. I gasped. The slightest of blushes graced your face, as you tilted your head, lips parting to speak, but I silenced you by placing a finger against them, and kissing your neck, down to your collarbone, to your shoulder, and back up, causing you to shiver, melting in my touch.
You were obviously inexperienced L, and I obviously wasn't.
Reminding myself that with every touch, every one of your little moans and sharp intakes of air, every blush, I was getting a step closer to your death, I let my hands wander to your waist, to your hips, to your manhood, pulsing between your legs. You squirmed, and I smiled, radiantly, as my slender fingers grasped the thick, meaty proof that you are human, curling around it and stroking the large member lovingly. This earned me another moan as one of your hands reached up, grabbing my forearm weakly, the rest of you still lying back as if you were a perfect doll, completely still except for your reactions to my actions. And I knew you were unsure of what to do.
My entire plan made me the predator, and you the prey. And that's what I would do. I would hunt you down to your death, ironically by making love to you. I mean fucking you. Because no matter how good an actor I am, I do not love you.
So I propped your knees up, pressing them against your chest while caressing your calves, ankles and smooth, smooth thighs, ravaging your neck with my lips, tongue and teeth. You shivered slightly, but let me, as I started pumping you slowly, fingers tight around your thick veined and quite engorged cock, at the same time placing my fingers against your tight hole, smiling gently at the brief flash of fear that crossed your face. I pressed two unprepared fingers into your pink, virgin hole, causing you to emit a low groan, from deep in your throat, clutching onto me desperately while I pumped your swollen manhood harder and harder.
When I pulled them out again the sharp features of your face relaxed slightly, only to contort in pain and unspeakable pleasure when in one smooth thrust, I worked my own pulsing member into you, causing you to gasp, shuddering.
And although I was the predator, and doing this to kill you, I still had to pretend differently, so I gave you a moment to get accustomed to my length, watching the pain fade away, leaving only the raw pleasure, and the slightly sad expression, which for some reason made me angry (It must have been because you were not supposed to feel sad, for the plan, not because I cared.) while I caressed the velvety skin of our shaft.
I kissed you tenderly on the lips, to stop you from talking. For some reason the sound of your voice, so loving, so vulnerable, made me feel weird. So instead of talking, I started thrusting into you, gripping you against me tightly, pounding into your sweet, sweet ass feeling something weird build up inside of me. You moaned as I desperately started jerking you off again, as if it was the only thing I could do, besides pumping into you like a madman. You moaned, and whimpered, as I kissed you, and stroked you, and fucked you.
And when we came, together, me squirting my seed deep inside of you, and you splattering it all over your stomach, and our cries united, and became one unified sound of pleasure and love, and you hugged me tightly, lovingly, even, that's when I told myself this was all just a trick.
And as I lied next to you, curled up by my side, head on my chest, hand gripping mine tightly, for a second I believed you knew. But I knew you couldn't, I had outsmarted you, because everyone believed I loved you, but I. But I. I knew I didn't. I didn't love you at all. I don't.
I don't know why, and it falls outside of the plan, but I cried the entire night again, gripping you tightly against me.
Two weeks later you died.
Just as planned.
I tricked you.