OMG so this fluffy plot bunny hit me when I was reading Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince again.
The part where Lupin tells Harry about living amongst his 'equals' under Greyback's rule?
Then I was like…wait…isn't Fenrir Loki's SON? (according to Mythology)
What if Loki read the book? Would he not be terribly offended that someone makes his son out to be some monster?
Obviously, this is AU. Loki has reformed or whatever and now lives in the Avengers Tower with his brother and the others and has been recruited into the Avengers initiative.
This will be a crack-ish ONE SHOT.
Please note that there will be hints of Clint/Phil and Tony/Loki.
Clint Barton was tired. Really tired. He had been on a stakeout with Natasha for the last 3 days and he'd barely slept.
At least the targets had been apprehended, although Clint did have rather nice bruises to show for it, but hey, the other guy looked worse. Natasha had been sent back earlier since Phil had insisted on dragging him to medical and having them look over his rather painful bruises just to be sure that that was all they were.
Really, he loved Phil, but sometimes he was way too overprotective. Really, Clint had suffered a lot worse before he joined S.H.I.E.L.D. In those days, he'd gotten used to treating his own injuries. Being on the run had made that skill essential. Sure, he did enjoy the benefits of a medical team being on hand all the time, but sometimes he just knew he was fine but Phil just needed to be reassured by them that Clint was alright.
All Clint wanted to do now was collect his favourite book from where he'd left it in the living room before curling up on the bed with it. He walked into the living room just in time to see Loki hurl it towards a wall.
Clint ran (or tired to run, as much as his bruises would let him) to the book, which had hit the wall before falling to the floor. He hugged it to his chest before sending a glare at Loki, who looked rather upset.
"Would you care to explain why you just threw my favourite book at a wall?" Clint asked dangerously, running his hands over the book to inspect for damage.
"That book is full of hideous untruths!" Loki shrieked, pointing at the book in Clint's hands.
"Well, that's rich. Coming from the God of Lies." Clint snarked, still angry that his favourite book had been treated so badly.
"I would never write something as terrible as that!" he exclaimed, still looking rather upset.
Clint had just opened his mouth to throw some insults Loki's way when Tony wandered in, scratching his head.
"What's going on? I was trying to sleep." He complained looking between the two, who were glaring at each other. "Why are you out of bed anyway? I got cold." He whined in Loki's direction.
"That book is full of horrendous lies!" he exclaimed, pointing in Clint's direction.
"Loki, it's just a book…"
"My favourite book too! Look what you did to it!" Clint complained annoyed, raising it to show the crumpled pages and folded cover.
Loki glared at the book in Clint's hands, which suddenly caught fire.
Clint shrieked in outrage, lunging for Loki. "That was my favourite book you bastard!" he struggled against Tony, who had grabbed him around the middle to stop him from attacking Loki.
Loki crossed his arms. "It deserved as much, writing such horrible lies."
Tony sighed, still holding on to the struggling Clint.
"Now now, let's settle this like responsible adults. Loki, it's just a book. It's not real. Can you please apologise to Clint for destroying it?"
"I will do no such thing!"
Clint growled at Loki in response.
"Look, I'll buy you a new one Barton. Now can you leave Loki alone?"
Clint muttered something under his breath before storming off in the direction of his room, slamming the door loudly.
Tony turned to find Loki glaring at the door through which Clint just exited. Tony moved to sit down on the couch, pulling Loki down with him.
"Loki, it's just a book. You didn't have to set it on fire."
"But, it lied!"
"It's a work of fiction. The things they write about are usually untrue. I can assure you that the 'magical world of harry potter' does not exist. Now, will you tell me what got you so worked up?" he asked, stroking a hand through Loki's hair.
"They wrote horrible lies about my son! They made Fenrir out to me some sort of monster!"
Tony just gaped at him.
"I hate that book." Loki grumbled.
"Look, Loki. You know Fenrir isn't like that. The woman just made some stories up. The name was probably just convenient. She probably doesn't even know that Fenrir actually exists!"
Loki pouted, anger mostly gone. "I don't care. I'm never reading her books again!"
Tony rolled his eyes. "Come on, let's get back to bed."
Sorry for another crappy ending.
I don't know what I was thinking, my mind is all screwed up.
Reviews are much appreciated!