Song is: Last To Know by Three Days Grace

Warnings: Break-up, angst... Generally just allot of sadness

Disclaimer: Don't own. Stop reminding me. :P

She just walked away.

Why didn't she tell me?

And where do I go tonight?

This isn't happening to me!

This can't be happening to me!


She didn't say a word.

Just walked away.

"Alexander, this has to end. I can't do this anymore."

Those were the words that broke his world apart. The words that completely and utterly destroyed any remains of the heart that he had managed to scrummage from the damage his life had left it in. Those words had taken those shards that he had painstakingly put back together and smashed through them, leaving them in dust. Unsalvageable.

When he had first heard them he hadn't been able to do a thing. He had just stared blankly at the person in front of him, ears buzzing and mind completely blank. His blue eyes had fixed themselves on that tanned face, looking numbly into expressionless green/gold eyes.

"What?" It had come out as a whisper, barely even there, but Magnus had heard it none-the-less. The warlock had let out a long sigh, eyes sliding shut only to open again with the shake of his head.

"I can't be with you anymore, Alec."

An uncomfortable pressure started in his chest, as if someone was slowly tightening their fist around his heart, tightening around the organ that began to speed its rhythm.


Alec could have sworn he saw a flash of agony in Magnus' eyes before it was gone, replaced by a look that almost seemed like pity.

"I don't want to be with you anymore Alexander. I was stupid to let it get this far."

Alec sucked in a sharp breath, a sharp pain twinging in his chest as his brain slowly started to come back to life. He wished it would have just stayed asleep.

"Magnus... I don't-" He took a steadying breath, pushing back the tears that threatened to rise. "I don't understand."

"I think you do, Alec. I think you understand perfectly." Magnus turned to go, walking towards the door, pausing with his hand on the handle. Alec could've sworn his hand shaked. "I don't want to see you anymore. We... We're through."

Alec blinked, shaking his head because this person was not Magnus, this person who was breaking him, destroying him, this couldn't be Magnus. Not kind, beautiful, funny, sweat, caring Magnus, who had held him while he cried over Max, stayed by him when he was bed ridden from injuries, kissed his forehead and stroked his hair as he fell asleep, whispering 'I love you' in his ear. This was not Magnus who he had given his heart to -or what was left of it anyways- his soul to. No. This was not him. It couldn't be.

He sucked in a sharp breath. "I-, Magnus, I- What did I do?" Because he had to have done something. It had to have been something horrible for Magnus to react like this. And now, because he hadn't know, because he hadn't thought about it Magnus was angry, he was breaking up with him-

"You did nothing Alec. And that's the problem." The warlock who Alec had though had loved him, who he had loved in return, who he had been prepared to give his life up for to be with, opened the door, moving into the hallway without a glance back, the door shutting behind him and leaving Alec in an empty room with a broken heart.

Alec was sure, that had anyone been there, they would have heard the loud roar that overtook his ears and made him fall to his knees in agony. He was sure that they would have heard the tinkling of glass falling to the floor and he was sure that they would have seen the fragile glass of his heart shattered around him, ground down beyond identification.

Had anyone been in the room, they would have seen Alexander Lightwood, someone who hid his tears behind a smile, who always put up a strong front, who always hid himself from others, finally break. They would have seen the way his once beautiful clear sky-blue eyes faded to a dull gray and they would have seen the look of utter devastation on his pale face. They would have seen the look of a boy who had grown up to fast face the destruction of his entire world.

They would have seen Alexander Lightwood die.

You were the first to say,

That we were not okay.

You were the first to lie,

When we were not alright.

Isabelle knew something was wrong when Alec came home with red-rimmed empty eyes instead of going to Magnus' flat to spend the night like he usually did. She wanted to go to him, to ask what was wrong, but the look of utter defeat held her in her place in the shadows of the kitchen, watching as he trudged up the stairs with his head low.

The next day he threw himself into training and she watched him drench himself in sweat, watched himself push himself until he could barely breath, until his muscles quivered from exhaustion, and then watched him push himself that much more further. She watched from the side-lines, silent and saddened, wanting to stop this monstrous train-wreck and yet knowing that this was what her brother needed.

That night he went out alone. She thought he had gone to see Magnus and with a relieved smile she hadn't thought twice of going out with Simon. She never noticed the gear and weapons that were missing until she came home to see Alec bloodied and passed out on the Institute's cold hardwood floors.

She went to see Magnus the morning after, because she knew it had something to do with Magnus it always did. It wasn't;t until she rung the buzzer and made her way up the steps and to the door that she understood. A vulturous blond with pale skin and full red lips with gleaming eyes answered the door, a loose shirt that Isabelle recognized as one of Magnus' less extravagant clothes draped across her body.

"Camille who is it-"

She stared at Magnus, horrified eyes darting between the blond and the warlock she had though she knew, who she had once considered a friend, a close friend and couldn't recognize the man she saw.

She barely;y managed to open her mouth but when she did her words held the fury and utter agony that she felt at the situation, a surge of triumph surging up around her when he flinched.

"All the people who've hurt him. Of all the people I never thought I'd include you in the list, Warlock."

And as she raced back down the steps, the tingling voice of the blond ringing through her ears she distantly realized- The shirt that the blond was wearing. Magnus had worn that to the Institute when Maryse had invited him over in a un-Maryse-like idea of having dinner with them. She had never seen Alec smile brighter than when her Mother had hugged him, whispering in his ear that she approved.

This was my first love,

She was the first to go.

And when she left me for you...

I was the last to know.

Jace knew something was wrong when Isabelle came running home, face flushed and hands shaking as a few stray tears fell from her cheeks. He knew that when she ran into the kitchen looking torn between wanting to rip something apart and screaming in agony that whatever was wrong it wasn't't something that he was prepared for. He was right.

"Magnus broke up with Alec. He's got some-some blond vampire bitch in his apartment."

Jace blinked, the piece of toast he had been reaching for forgotten. His brain took a moment to process this before his thoughts where whirling around in an uncontrollable storm.

"Are you sure?" He couldn't help but ask, hoping beyond hope that she was mistaken.

"For god's sakes!" Isabelle hissed, eyes flashing. "Of course I'm sure! Alec's been acting strange, nearly got himself killed last night, and the blond was wearing Magnus' shirt! What the hell do you think that means Jace?"

Jace stood, going over to pull his sister into a hug, awkwardly stroking her hair as she sobbed into his shoulder, all the fight leaving her.

"Oh god Jace. What are we supposed to do about Alec? He was finally happy and now- This! It isn't fair."

No. Jace thought. It wasn't't fair. He thought of the days Alec came home with a grin on his face, eyes gleaming and cheeks flushed, not even bothered when Jace made a snide remark about rainbows and bow-tox. He remembered the way Alec's eyes had gleamed in pride after he had kissed Magnus in front of the entire Clave, nervous but happy as he held the Warlock's hand in his own. He thought of all the times Alec had laughed, something he hadn't done in years without struggling to hide it. He remembered Alec being happy. ...Because of Magnus. He wondered if happiness was even an option for his brother anymore.

Why didn't she tell me?

Where to go tonight?

She didn't say a word.

She just walked away!

Alec knew it was a bad idea to go to Taki's, especially with blood dripping from his gear and a gash on his left shoulder. He supposed had he been like he was before he would have used a stele to heal himself, or maybe even waited to go to Magnus' to feel the soothing presence of the Warlock's magic swirling around him, soothing his aches and bruises. He supposed he might have cared before. But not now. Not anymore.

He moved through the door, closing his eyes and breathing in the scents around him. He could smell the food that had once had his mouth watering in anticipation and moved to a open table, distantly moving his shoulder as to not have the blood drip onto the floor but instead down his arm. He sat himself into the cushioned booth, gazing blankly at a worried waitress -McKeenzy or something or the other- allowing her to hand him a towel to wrap around his arm before asking for his order. He replied emotionlessly, saying the first thing that came to the top of his head and then nearly cringing at the pain that washed through the invisible cavity of his chest. It was what Magnus ordered. What he would devour with that child-like expression in his eyes, grinning that cheshire grin of his.

He leaned his head back with a sigh, letting his eyes close in defeat as he swallowed back the tears that weren't there anymore. He was distantly aware of the phantom beating of his chest and he took comfort in it, because even though he knew his heart was still and dead the illusion helped him.

After all, he had people to live for. Even if he no longer cared to live for himself.

You were the first to say,

That we were not okay.

You were the first to lie,

When we were not alright.

The deep laughter was what brought him back from his mind, reverberating through his head until he had to shake his head to clear himself of it. He stiffened, lifting a large fry to his mouth before glancing up from his lashes. When he saw nothing he relaxed, a relieved sigh escaping his mouth. And that was when he saw her.

Camille Belcourt.

She was stunning as usual, or at least, he assumed she was considering the glances she was receiving. However, she wasn't't what drew his eyes, no, it was the man at her arm, sliding into a booth beside her, arm wrapped around her shoulder. Alec inhaled sharply, reaching a hand up claw at his chest, a sharp pain lacing through where the organ should have been like the shaft of a released arrow.

She was clad in a red dress -red, Magnus hated red- and her blond hair fell down around her shoulders. Magnus was clad in a pair of skin tight dark-blue jeans that were splattered artfully with white paint. A loose shirt that revealed the strip of skin above his waist fell around his shoulders in a bright purple and several rings and earrings decorated his hands and ears. His eyes were racooned with a dark charcoal with silver specks of glitter.

He was stunning. And oh god, did it hurt.

The waitress chose then to come with his check and he shoved a few bills in to her hands, much more than was needed he knew, muttering a quick 'keep the change' before darting back out in to the night, barely even caring that his blood splattered down onto the clean floor, or that a pair of green/gold eyes followed after him in shock.

This was my first love,

She was the first to go.

And when she left me for you...

I was the last to know.

The days that followed were hard to say the least. Everywhere he went he saw the way Magnus had held Camille to his side, the same smile on his face, that same look of adoration that he had once given Alec. He saw how beautiful she was, saw the way Magnus' eyes looked at her appreciatively and felt shame well up in his chest.

He often wondered if that was why it had happened. If it was because he wasn't't attractive enough. Witty enough. Outgoing. Funny. Seductive. And the list went on and on.

Alec wanted to ask Magnus if he ever regretted his decision, but he quickly forgot about it as soon as he recalled the two of them together. The worst part was that he couldn't even be angry at the Warlock for using him and then losing him. He had been expecting it really, if he was being truthful. But when he though about it, how cruel could Magnus get?

The Warlock had spent so much time getting him to believe that he loved him, that he was perfect, that he wouldn't want anyone else in the world. He had whispered it over and over and over again as they made love, as they laid on his hot pink couch, as they walked hand and hand down the street. He had made Alec believe that maybe, just maybe, he was worth something., He had made him believe that he was able to love and be loved, that he wasn't as pathetic and hideous and weak as he had though himself. Magnus had made him believe he actually loved him. And just as Alec had begun to believe it Magnus had shattered him.

Alec wondered if everything he thought he'd known about his once-love had been a lie.

I'll be the first to say,

That now I'm okay.

And for the first time,

I've opened up my eyes.

This was my worst love!

You'll be the first to go!

He was getting better. He didn't wake up with the phantom pain of his heart being crushed and ripped apart. He didn't claw at his chest as if shards of glass were slowly piercing through. He didn't hear the intoxicating ring of Magnus' laugh ring in his ears anymore and the brilliant cheshire grin didn't flash before his eyes every time he looked at the moon.

He was getting better. But that didn't mean he was ever going to be fixed again.

And when she leaves you for dead,

You'll be the last to know.

Alec knew that going to a party would be a bad idea, let alone a Downworlder party, but like the idiot he was he'd allowed Izzy to drag him along.

It had not been ten minutes that he'd been there when he saw them. They were in a heated discussion, Magnus' hands were clenched and a world of agony was contained in his eyes as Camille turned with a swirl of blond and red. As Magnus leaned against the wall, posture slumped Alec felt the all consuming need to go to the love that had deserted to him. To take him in his arms and tell him that it would be okay. To ask him if he needed someone to hold him as he slept to escape the nightmares that haunted him -and Alec could tell from the dark rings the Warlock had struggled to cover with glitter that he was having them- and to tell Magnus that he wsn't alone that Alec was there, would always be there-

He closed his eyes, a sob rising from his throat. Because he couldn't. Not after everything. Besides he doubted Magnus would want him of all people to anyways. He probably wanted that vampire. The one with the good looks and the charm to match. The one that accented him perfectly. Alec opened his eyes, taking in a sharp breath when he met a pair of green/gold eyes. They stared at each other for a moment before Magnus gave him a small sad smile, mouthing two words that ground the dusty remains of his heart into nothing but vapor.

"I'm sorry."

He staggered back, tears flooding his eyes because he couldn't do this, Magnus couldn't do this to him, not again, not after he'd just begun to mend, not after he'd begun to heal-

He bumped into someone, nearly falling over until a slightly tan hand reached out and pulled him up right.

"Whoa there." A rumbling voice laughed,. "Be careful, wouldn't want you to get hurt now, would we?"

Alec looked up to meet the eyes of the man before him, letting out a sharp gasp. A pair of gentle brown eyes looked back at him, rings of green and hazel weaved throughout. Dark chestnut hair fell into the man's eyes, brushing the tips of his cheekbones.

The man looked him over, eyes softening in concern as he reached a hand up to brush a thumb across his cheek, collecting a tear that threatened to fall. "At least not more than you've already been hurt."

Alec blinked, starstruck and unable to move.

The man took a step back, smiling at him as he stuck a hand out. "My name's Cameron, what's yours?"

Alec automatically took it within his own, smiling for the first time in months. "Alexander. But call me Alec."

I give up on deadlines. Seriously. *sigh* I know I said I'd have the sequel up to PINM and two other one-shots but I've been extremly busy. My brother had his birthday party and my cousins came down and then I had an all day float-down-the-river-in-tubes-day (where I smashed into rocks like no ones buisness and froze to death) topped with trying to get through summer school... I haven't had allot of time. I'll try to get it up by next week but I won't make any promises.

With all that said...

How did you like the angst topped with angst which was topped with just a tiny cherry filled with angst and a possibly-happy-Alec-ending? Review and tell me! :)