Hey everyone. It's Shay and I hope you enjoy this story. Probably not going to get a lot of updates real fast, cause I'm still figuring it out.
I know Chris Evans plays Jensen and Captain America, so I jumped on the Jensen is Cap band wagon. But this time I wanted to take a bit of a different route.
Have fun, and I do not own the Losers of the Avengers!
Jake Jensen never knew why, but Captain America always bugged him.
It had happened since day one. The moment where he woke up in the tiny hospital room and saw a reporter talking about how the good Captain had survived a terrible accident but he would be out of commission for a while.
Jensen remembered glaring at the screen with a sense of definite wrongness at the announcement.
Except he hadn't been Jake Jensen at the time. Instead he had been John Doe. Found under a half destroyed building in New York with a massive head wound that had just continued to ooze blood. To the doctor's amazement he hadn't died, which they were expecting.
Instead John Doe entered a six month coma, and when he woke up he'd lost most of his muscle mass and needed glasses. They said it was damage to his corneas that caused the loss of eyesight. The scarring to his corneas had been so severe massive surgery had been needed to keep him from becoming blind. The brain damage elsewhere had been so massive that they couldn't tell if his inability to shut up came from damage also. Retrograde amnesia also, and a tendency to forget short term information.
Or his inability to talk to women. Or his lack of social skills. Or his freakish ability to heal. Or the fact that he was never sick. Or his fascination with computers.
Ah, the computers. John Doe remembered staring at a computer and realizing someone close to him was connected to computers. In six weeks John Doe knew everything there was to know about computers.
There was one woman he could talk to in the whole place. Her name was Jennifer Jensen, and John Doe learned her story on day one.
She had gotten pregnant by an abusive asshole. When Jennifer tried to leave, the asshole had beaten her half to death then shot her kid brother. The boy had died in seconds and the only reason Jennifer lived was for her baby after that.
John Doe had managed to say the right thing for once and helped her get over her brother's death. When John Doe was released from the hospital Jennifer took him in as her new younger brother.
He was now Jake Jensen, and had to support his new found pregnant sister. So Jensen joined the army.
No idea why. It just seemed right. It was the best decision of his life that he actually remembered. Sure he got in trouble a lot but his skills as a tech made him valuable. Then there was the part where he could run miles without getting winded and carry loads that made even the strongest men groan. Jensen was pretty soon referred to being superhuman in basic training.
Right after basic he went out of special ops and passed with flying colors. Jensen didn't like thinking about his first teams, of how they hated him and some left him to die. But Wade's team was the worst.
The bastard had abandoned him to die in Afghanistan and Jensen dealt with six months of torture. The only good thing to come out of it was that Clay's unit saved him and brought him home.
Jensen had been grateful for that and grateful when Clay took him in. Especially because it let him meet Cougar.
It took Jensen two weeks with the Losers to inform an annoyed Roque that he couldn't shut up due to brain damage, so stick that in a juicebox and suck it. Jensen had to admit that was a stupid response, especially because his team got all weirdly protective of him after that. Clay was always on the lookout for clues to Jensen's forgotten past, Pooch felt like he and Jolene had to give Jensen a semblance of normality, and Roque got pissy when people insulted Jensen. Cougar was the only one not to care and Jensen fell in love with him for that.
And because of his inexplicable attraction to snipers. Jensen knew the team found it strange but Cougar found it sexy, so screw them.
Cougar. The best thing to ever happen to Jensen. They had been together for three years by this point, and after the whole L.A. incident (as Jensen liked to call it) the got married. So now he was Jake Jensen Alvarez and damn proud of it.
Cougar always found Jensen's excitement over the new last name adorable not that Jensen minded.
What had he been thinking about earlier?
Oh yeah! There was something seriously wrong with Captain America. Jensen knew it but normally didn't think about it. But when the whole team was gathered around Jennifer's t.v., Jolene and Jennifer included, watching the Avengers deal with the newest crisis the overwhelming feeling of wrong came back. And of course Jensen had to vocalize it from his rather comfy position curled up next to Cougar.
"Does Captain America give anyone else the creeps, or is it just me?"
And they were all staring at him like he was crazy. Joy.
Jensen turned big blue eyes up to Cougar who was giving him the my-husband-is-insane look and pouted.
"Cougs, you're with me, right?" Jensen pleaded, "Something is seriously weird with Captain America and it's not just the energy shield, although that is just wrong also. Seriously why should he use an energy shield, his old one was good enough. Vibranium can take a shit ton of damage so suck it energy shield. It's stupid and going to fail in a fight. His eyes are shifty. Like super evil shifty so maybe Captain America isn't as much of a good guy as he would have you believe. Oh, maybe that's an alien disguised as Captain America!"
Jensen just smiled happily up at Cougar who now looked horrified. Jensen didn't have to look to know everyone else look horrified also, including Aisha. There was just something about insulting Captain America that did it to people.
"Jensen, never say that about Captain America," Clay ordered and Jensen just scowled at that.
"Why not, it's true," Jensen whined.
Jennifer leaned forward and Jensen turned to her immediately just like he had all those years ago when trying to adjust. "Jake you just don't say anything bad about Captain America, it's a social norm," she explained gently.
Jensen rolled his eyes, "That's stupid."
"You're face is stupid," Pooch said quickly. Better to cut in and distract the hacker before he decided to get pissy about social norms and how he shouldn't follow them.
"Your mom is stupid," Jensen snipped back while turning his nose up at Pooch. Jensen scowled after a second and turned those big blue eyes back to Cougar, "Cougs, I can't remeber what I was talking about. Was it important?"
Normally Cougar hated those moments when someone as brilliant as Jensen forgot simple things, like when he ate or if he even said hello to you. But now Cougar was grateful because even with the Losers it was dangerous to insult Captain America.
"No mi amor," Cougar gently reassured Jensen while running his fingers through the fine blond hair.
Jensen just shrugged and went back to watching the t.v. and eventually everyone else did also. But no one could forget the pure hatred in Jensen's tone when he talked about the Captain.
Aisha turned to Jolene and leaned in to whisper, "Does he do that a lot?"
"Never this bad," Jolene admitted, "We all knew he didn't like Captain America but he's never been quite so vocal about it as tonight. But you know Jensen, no filter what so ever."
Pooch snorted softly at that, "Understatement if I ever heard one. Did you know first time we bought him a hooker he screamed?"
Jennifer perked up at that. Shooting her brother a glare she demanded, "What happened? Jake never told me this story."
Jensen glared sulkily at the carpet and grumbled, "Nothin to tell."
"There is so something to tell," Pooch countered. With unholy glee he turned back to Jennifer, "So, after the first mission none of us knew Jensen was gay. Clay decided..."
"Why are you saying I decided this? I did no such thing."
"Shut up Clay, I'm telling a story," Pooch ordered with an indignant huff, "Anyway, Clay ordered us to get Jensen laid because he did such a good job. So we took him to the strip bar off base that was twenty minutes away. Cougar and I managed to enlist the help..."
"Enlist my ass. You paid that tart."
"Quiet Jensen. Your sister wants to hear this," Pooch just waved his hand at Jensen flippantly, "Cougar told her she would be helping her country, and Roque paid her. So the hooker, Sparkle I think her name was, takes Jensen by the hand and headed into the back. Two minutes later Jensen starts screaming like a little girl..."
"I did not! It was prepubescent at best!"
"It was a little girl. Anyway, Cougar is up and running cause Jensen's screaming for Cougar to come save him, and we thought this chick might be like Clay's women. No offense Aisha."
"Cougar kicked the door down and we all rushed in, our guns drawn. The hooker was in tears going on about how she just touched Jensen on the arm and he started screaming at her. Jensen was nowhere to be found and we all had a little freak out over it."
"Where was he?" Jennifer demanded, hands covering her mouth in a futile attempt to curb in her laughter.
"Hiding under the goddamned bed," Clay grumbled, "Took us half an hour to get him out."
Jennifer snorted and shook her head in denial, "That's nothing. First day I met him he took one look at the head nurse, called her a psychotic Nazi bitch and hit her with his I.V. stand."
Jensen just shrugged as everyone started laughing at that. "She was an evil Nazi spy and no one believed me," Jensen whined which just caused everyone to laugh harder, "No one should be that happy to poke people with needles."
As the team returned to happy chatter Jensen frowned to himself while pressing in closer to Cougar. Why was it he knew what a Nazi was, but it took three weeks to learn what terrorists were? Why was Vietnam news and WW I seemed like a thing of the past? Why did Captain America just seem wrong to him?
Jensen wasn't sure who he had been before he lost his memory but those were concerning questions that floated around in his head for hours on end if left alone with no computer. He was involved with something rather shady, seeing how he had known how to hotwire a car and pick a pocket but not how to use a cell phone.
A warm hand came to rest gently on Jensen's neck. Looking up he smiled happily at Cougar who was watching him with concern in those warm brown eyes.
"I'm fine," Jensen told him gently before brightening up again, "Hey, how likely is it that I can hack into Iron Man's suit and not get caught because that would be ridiculously awesome..."
Jensen knew he would be fine even if he had once worked for Max, because as long as Cougar loved him it was perfect.
Flames will be laughed at, then put out with a fire extinguisher. Also, if anyone has any fun facts for Jensen to use, please send them in.