The Interceptor was travelling through the Forgotten Zone, to pick up Saint Walker. The Guardians wanted to personally thank him for his contribution to the defeat of the Red Lantern Armada, so Hal Jordan volunteered to transport him back to Oa. Razer was also on board, not because he particularly like Saint Walker, but any chance to get off Oa was to good of an offer to pass up.
The ship jumped out of ultra-warp and was cruising at impulse speed towards the Green Lantern planet.
"ETA, 34 standard galactic minutes", Aya announced.
"Thank you, Aya. It's just smooth sailing from here" Hal said and leaned back against his command chair.
Aya played around with some settings on her dashboard and then walked over to Razer's chair.
"I am getting anomalous readings from the starboard of the ship. I think the jump out of ultra-warp might've dislodged one of my sensor relays. Will you help me correct the anomaly, Razer?"
He looked up and saw her leaning over. Her eyes were glowing violet, and she winked at him.
"Sensor relay... riiiiiight" he thought.
He threw Hal Jordan a look and saw that he was just staring into the stars, not paying attention to them. Still...
"I think you are more than capable of handling the situation yourself" he said and again looked in Hal Jordan's direction. He hoped she would get the hint.
Aya leaned forward and placed her hand on his thigh.
"I would really appreciate your assistance" she insisted.
Razer felt trapped. He nodded his head and mouthed the word "no", but Aya ignored it and let her hand travel upwards...
"Razer, give the girl a hand, make yourself useful, you slob" Hal shouted from where he was seated, but still didn't look at the pair.
Razer and Aya smiled at each other, amused by Jordan's ignorance. Obviously the human didn't know what he was suggesting. Razer sighed and got up.
"Fine" he snapped, feigning frustration.
Aya left the command deck and Razer followed her, only instead of going to the hangar bay, she took a right and entered Razer's quarters. Razer entered after her, slightly more hesitant. The doors slid shut behind him.
"Aya, are you sure this is..."
He was interrupted when the android jumped on him, wrapped her legs around his waist and proceeded to kiss his breath away. Razer had to fight against the artificial gravity of the ship, not to fall down. They twirled together until finally landing on the bed, with Aya on top. She broke the kiss only to fumble around the edges of his tunic so she could take it off.
"31,3 minutes remaining. No time for conversing" she muttered but Razer grabbed her hands and halted her movements.
"We can't do this with Hal onboard. Remember the whole 'Hal's going to kill me' thing? I wasn't exaggerating"
"A little danger can be exciting, remember?" she said and nibbled on his lower lip.
"Clever, but I still..."
"If you don't reciprocate, I'll be forced to take extra measures to insure an optimum level of excitation"
"What kind of extra measures?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
She took off his pants and showed him.
On the main bridge
Hal found it very relaxing to gaze into the screen that turned stars into kamikaze fireflies, a nice little optical illusion as they travelled through normal space in stead of an ultra-warp conduit. He even thought he was dozing off at some point, but then realised it was actually the lighting on the bridge that was wonky.
The light was fading in and out, and some of the panels were flickering. He opened a com line.
"Aya, I'm getting some weird lighting... effects I guess you could call them up here. Does it have anything to do with the sensor relay malfunction you mentioned?"
He gave the nav-com computer a couple of seconds to answer, but there was only silence.
"Aya, do you copy? Hello?"
He switched frequencies.
"Razer, this is Hal, can you guys hear me?"
More silence met him at the other end. According to the readings in front of him, Aya and Razer were still on board, but the computer couldn't tell him where on board they were. And the even more interesting thing was that one of the rooms on the Interceptor was completely offline, meaning no cameras or sensors were activated. That part of the ship was shrouded in darkness. And it was Razer's room.
Hal sat back down in the command chair, pondering. Between the lights and Razer and Aya disappearing, something very strange was going on. The funny thing is that the light itself followed a specific pattern of synchronized fade-ins and fade-outs that increased in speed and pattern was terribly familiar to him...
"It's almost like the ship is having sex" he thought.
His mind cleared for a second after thinking that... and then he erupted in laughter. His laugh was deep and rich and quickly shoved the silence on the bridge out of the way. Hal was laughing so hard at the idea, his eyes started tearing up. He was still giggling... but a strange sense of dread was also taking over, dread that maybe the idea wasn't so prepostorous.
The light show ended with a huge burst that made him have to actually shield his eyes.
The giggling turned nervous after that, and ended with a very dry gulp.
Aya showed herself soon enough down the hallway, with Razer walking behind her. She resumed her position in the chair to the right of Hal.
"I believe we have corrected the problem. I'm getting complete readings now. We should have no more problems until getting back to Oa"
"There was something weird happening with the lights up here. And you didn't answer your com"
"I apologize. This area has a high concentration of para-neutrinos. It's affecting our com system and the sensor relays in tandem"
"Ah, ok. So that must've been it" Hal replied.
Aya was very difficult to read. He'd never known her to lie to him, and even if she would some day, he doubted his ability to be able to tell. The Red Lantern on the other hand...
"Yes?" the red lantern answered calmly.
Hal stared at him with a solemn expression.
"You just had sex, didn't you?"
Razer's jaw dropped and his eyes looked like they were desperate to leave their sockets.
"Wh-what?" he stammered.
"Oh my God, you did" Hal shouted getting up from his chair. He grabbed his forehead and stared wide eyed at the pair, his head going back and forth between the two of them.
"Hal... are you on the verge of going into shock?" Aya asked getting up also.
"No, Aya, no... see, first I have to kick his ass. And then I can go into shock"
The Green Lantern started pacing menacingly in Razer's direction, who already assumed a defensive stance, holding his ringed hand up. Aya stepped between the two of them.
"There is no need for violence" she said neutrally.
"Aya, please step aside. I know you don't understand the specifics of the situation, but he took advantage of you"
"I did no such thing" Razer shouted angrily from behind Aya.
"When I get my hands on you..." Hal screeched, but Aya pushed him backwards.
"Hal, he did not take advantage of me in any way, shape or form. I was fully aware of my actions"
"Why are you defending him? He used you!"
"He did not use me"
"Whatever you two did in there, trust me, it was for his own benefit not yours since you can't... can't..."
"Can not do what? Have intercourse? Feel physical pleasure?"
"Yes. You can't do that... stuff"
"That is where you are incorrect Hal Jordan"
"Wh-what?" Hal stammered (it was his turn).
"I've made certain modifications to my form"
Hal was stunned into silence. His expression changed from shock to one of utter suffering.
"What did you do to yourself, baby!?"
Aya and Razer exchanged awkward looks.
"I dont think you'd care to know the technical specifics, Aya started. Suffice to say I am fully functional and anatomically correct"
"How? How is the even possible?" Hal pressed on.
"The Star Sapphires provided assistance"
"You brought the Star Sapphires into this!?" Hal asked bewildered, looking at Razer.
"Stop raising your voice at him. It was I who made this decision"
"I don't believe that for a second. He turned you into his own personal sexbot and now you're defending him"
"Hal, it was my idea" Aya repetead, stressing every word.
Hal just stared at her, keeping his jaw clenched. Eventually he moved towards the navigation controls.
"What are you doing? Why are you changing the course?" Aya asked.
"We are heading straight to Zamaron and they better undo whatever it is they did"
"No!" Aya protested and grabbed Hal's shoulder, turning him around.
"Damnit Aya. We get this settled now and the Guardians don't ever have to hear about it"
"Why would I need to be worried about the Guardians?"
"Because I am worried about the Guardians! You know their whole shtick about emotions don't you? Well how do you think they are going to feel about a navigational computer that built itself a Star Sapphire powered vagina?"
"You are overreacting" Razer finally spoke.
"You shut up, Hal barked. How could you let her do this? I thought you cared about her. She's barely one year old, you pervert"
"That may be so but I'm fully conscious and mature enough to make decisions regarding my body"
"No, you're not. You're not mature enough, because if you were, you wouldn't do anything drastic and you would come to talk to me first"
"You would've rejected anything I had to say on the matter"
"No, I would've said 'not now'. I would've reminded you that you are the navigational computer of the flagship of the Green Lantern fleet, in a time when the galaxy needs Green Lanterns. I would've said that thousands of lives depend on you, including my own. And maybe you would've realised that you have other priorities now than playing whoopie with Razer. And if that would've happened, you wouldn't have completely ruined my trust in you like you just did"
Hal finished his tirade and took a deep breath to cool himself off. He couldn't look at Aya anymore and he turned his back to her, still thinking about going to Zamaron, but not quite as determined as he was before. He hated having to shout at her, hated the entire situation in fact, but he hoped he'd gotten through to her.
"I just wanted what you and Carol have" Aya finally whispered, staring at the floor.
Hal turned to look at her, his heart breaking at the sound of her words.
"Am I not supposed to have that? Am I not supposed to feel love?"
"Oh, sweetheart. This, Hal said waving his hand between Aya and Razer, this isn't like what Carol and I have. You did that to yourself and then you fooled around with Razer a couple of times, and now you think you're in love"
"I did it because I loved him" she confessed.
"What?" Razer asked bewildered. It hadn't been very hard for him to stay out of their conversation, speciically because he didn't want to die, but at the same time he didn't want Aya to feel abandoned. But now, he felt the need to interject when he heard what she'd said.
Aya looked in his direction and backed up her words:
"I never wanted anything else. Anybody else. Only you"
Though he knew it might be the last thing he ever did, since Hal would desintegrate him on the spot, Razer couldn't help himself. He felt a surge of emotion and rushed over to Aya's side. He kissed her with all the energy and passion he could muster, in an effort to wordlessly convey his own feelings of love and gratitude.
"Ah, fer crying out loud!" Hal lamented turning around.
"Will you stop that that!? I can hear lip smacking" he said, his back still turned.
When finally the irritating wet sounds seemed to halt, the Green lantern turned around and saw Razer cupping Aya's face in his hands and the pair staring in that annoying away into each other's eyes, like who knows what untold secrets they might find in there. He felt like throwing up, but composed himself. Unfortunately, he had to admit it. The kids were smitten with each other. And it was his own damn fault in the first place. He allowed Aya to explore her individuality, and he's the one that brought Razer on board.
Come to think of it, if he DID bring up the issue with the Guardians, he might just as likely get booted out of the GL Corps for his own hand in the development of the situation.
Hal sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose under his mask.
"Ok, here's what we're gonna do. We're not going to Zamaron. But you are on 'probation'. You will both be on your best behaviour. The Guardians cannot know about this, yet. Kilowog cannot know about this or Razer, well, that would definitely not bode well for you. All 'recreational' activities are confined to Razer's quarters. There will be no shenanigans on the main bridge, in the conference room or while we're in the middle of a jump. Is that clear?"
"Crystal clear. No shenanigans. From this point on" Aya specified.
"From this point on? What do you mea..." Hal stopped himself when he realised what she meant. He smacked his forehead. "You already did it on the main bridge, and in the conference room, and in the middle of a jump"
Aya and Razer looked at each other amused. Razer even looked like he might giggle. Only he didn't giggle. Ever.
"It was a long jump back from Zamaron" Aya explained.
"Yeah, riiight", Hal muttered sardonically. "Fine, from this point on, the aforementioned rules remain in place. Along with the inherent 'if Razer hurts you, I'll castrate him' rule"
"Agreed" Aya replied.
"Wait... what!? What do you mean agreed" Razer asked in panicked tone.
"Good, that's settled. Well, thank you for completely ruining my day. Actually my entire year you two. The one good thing in all of this is that I don't have to worry about Aya getting pregnant"
"Well... actually... I'm working on a project to..."
Aya stopped talking when she saw all the color drain from Hal's face. Razer was already pale, but he too was overcome with a sense of fear and dread.
"Gotcha" she simply said and turned around to greet Saint Walker, who had been banging on the entrance to the ship for the past 10 minutes.
AN: End. :) Hope you enjoyed it, sorry for the delay in finishing it and a very big thank you to everybody who showed their support for this silly little story.