A/N: Fluffy, fluffy fluffiness. Basically just all the things that, in my imagination, make up the gloriousness that is their relationship. Rated M for a few racy parts.
In Love Is
In love is weekly postcards while they're abroad (Kurt in Paris, Blaine in Florence - naturally), every inch of space covered with anecdotes and revelations and "God I miss you"s.
In love is kisses - some sweet and soft, some quick, some stolen, some deep and passionate, some utterly desperate. Kisses on the lips, the forehead, the cheek, but other places too: ankles, necks, taut stomachs, the inside of Kurt's wrist, the dip between Blaine's shoulder blades. In love is no inch of skin left untouched, unkissed, unexplored.
In love is Kurt's heart breaking, breaking, every time he watches an interaction between Blaine and his father. In love is the nights they've stayed up late talking about it, working through Blaine's feelings, the hurt, the rejection, the constant sense of not-good-enough. In love is the small smiles, the subtle touches, the little reassurances from Kurt that help him get through those godawful family visits.
In love is "Teenage Dream," "Baby It's Cold Outside," and "Candles." In love is every song that's played while they're together, every note Blaine's strummed on his guitar with Kurt on his mind, every time they've sung "Perfect" to each other in the car. In love is music and humming and duets and singing in the shower.
In love is pictures - from photo booths, from prom, from college. From their wedding. From the summer before college when Rachel panicked that they were leaving and decided she needed to take pictures of everything. Framed on Kurt's dresser, carried around in Blaine's wallet, stuck to their refrigerator with magnets. In love is the gleeful smiles, the captured laughter, the way Blaine is looking at Kurt in that one picture from Rachel's graduation party.
In love is books. The Great Gatsby, To Kill a Mockingbird (Kurt's favorite), Great Expectations (Blaine's a huge Dickens fan) - between the two of them, they've read the world's greatest literature (and some of its trashiest, which has proven amusing). Their tastes diverge somewhat but they both love to read and they both love to talk about reading, and that fosters many a lengthy conversation. In love is heated debates over which Harry Potter book is best (Kurt swears it's Prisoner of Azkaban, while Blaine favors Order of the Phoenix), nights spent at home with Blaine reading aloud from a mutual favorite, and the rickety old bookshelf they find in a thrift store when they decide they absolutely must have one in their apartment. The weekend when they buy a gay romance novel from the Barnes & Noble around the corner and spend hours reading particularly racy passages to each other and giggling hysterically.
In love is their bed. The fact that they have a bed that they can call their bed. Not Kurt's, not Blaine's, but Kurt-and-Blaine's. In love is the way it smells like both of them, the way the sheets are soft and rumpled in the morning, the way they tumble into it kissing and laughing and tossing clothes every which way. In love is Sunday mornings spent snuggled close together in that bed, sometimes hungover, sometimes just talking, sometimes getting up to all kinds of mischief.
In love is the adventures they go on together. New York, Europe, a road trip to California to visit Mercedes the summer after Blaine's freshman year. The time Blaine convinces Kurt to go camping and accidentally leaves the tent at his house - they end up pushing down the backseat of Kurt's car and huddling under blankets in the trunk, gazing at the stars through the open sunroof (and, quite frankly, that's as close to camping as Kurt ever needs to be). The night they go skinny dipping in the Atlantic Ocean, the Friday they agree to accompany Blaine's crazy roommate to a rather terrifying club (although, to be honest, neither of them remembers much about that night), and the show they manage to sneak into at New York Fashion Week (a few years later they have actual seats thanks to Kurt's job).
In love is holding hands. The way their fingers twist together, the well-moisturized smoothness of Kurt's hands, the guitar callouses on Blaine's. Kurt's hands pinned to the pillow above his head, or fingers intertwined during a stroll through Greenwich Village. Reaching for each other like on the night they got the call about Blaine's mother's cancer diagnosis.
In love is tears. Tears of joy, anger, laughter - the day they got married, the night they nearly broke up, that time they tried to bake cookies and ended up having a food fight in their kitchen. The way Kurt sobbed on the day he left for New York, and the way Blaine somehow managed to hold it together until Kurt had gone.
In love is falling asleep on each other's shoulders.
In love is planes, trains, and automobiles. The flights to and from New York, the low-cost airlines that they used to visit each other in Europe, the overnight train they took to Mike and Tina's wedding when their flight got cancelled at the last minute. Kurt's car and the many dates it drove them to; Blaine's father's car and the time Kurt went down on Blaine in the front seat. The way Burt found out they were dating when they got a flat en route to their first date and had to call him for help. Their first car together, when they were married and moving out of the city with a daughter that would soon need to be driven places.
In love is color. The warm hazel of Blaine's eyes and the hours he has spent trying to identify all of the colors in Kurt's. The pink flush that used to rise on their cheeks when they talked about things like touching and wanting and sex. The pink flush that still rises in Kurt's cheeks when Blaine whispers something dirty to him in the middle of a crowded room. In love is the navy blue and red of the Warblers uniform, a testament to where it all began for them. Those ties are still hanging somewhere in their closet. In love is Blaine's pink toothbrush, the rainbow-colored coffee mugs Brittany gave them when they moved in together, and the bright yellow walls of the kitchen in their first apartment. Most of all, in love is the dark green of the sweater Blaine was wearing when he proposed.
In love is bowties. Bowties in solid colors, or with stripes, polka-dots, even candy canes on them. The fact that Blaine wore one that Kurt had bought for him on his first day at McKinley, and somehow that became his signature look. He wears them less frequently as they get older, but occasionally an old favorite makes an appearance and they kiss and reminisce until the bowtie is lost in a pile of clothes on the floor.
In love is trust. When Blaine is gone on a weekend camping trip with no cell service, when another guy is hitting on Kurt at a party. When they're apart for an entire year of their horny teenage lives, and then studying abroad in different countries a few years later. It's hard as hell and sometimes they have their doubts but when it comes down to it, they trust each other. They trust each other with their secrets, their bodies, and their hearts.
In love is cooking. The time Blaine tries to surprise Kurt with his favorite meal and ends up burning it all - he looks close to tears until Kurt hugs him and announces that he really just wanted ice cream for dinner anyway. They spend the night snuggling on the couch, passing a spoon back and forth while Blaine explains the meal he had planned. The next day Kurt shows up at his house with a cookbook and they spend the rest of the summer trying recipes and improving on Blaine's cooking skills. By the time they're out of college and living together, cooking is one of their favorite things to do together.
In love is white lilies. They're Kurt's favorite flower because they make him think of his mom and somehow Blaine figures that out without Kurt telling him. In love is when they turn up in Kurt's dorm on Valentine's Day of his freshman year, but even moreso when they arrive on a random Tuesday just because.
In love is dancing. The slow dance at prom that was probably the moment Kurt really, truly fell in love with Blaine Anderson. The way Blaine stood there, brave and solid and there for Kurt in spite of everything he'd gone through. In love is the hours spent at booty camp and the random dance parties they used to have at Dalton, the time Blaine convinced Kurt to take a swing dancing class and the night they slow danced around their apartment just because Blaine was feeling romantic.
In love is Harry Potter. They're both obsessed and thank God for that because Kurt swore he would never date a guy who wasn't a fan. They feel confident that their relationship can work despite the fact that Kurt is clearly a Ravenclaw and Blaine is obviously a Gryffindor. In love is the Halloween Kurt convinced Blaine to dress up as Harry, the summer they re-read the series at the same time, and the long weekend when Kurt passed up a spa getaway with the girls in favor of going to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter with Blaine.
In love is when Kurt can tell something is bothering Blaine without even looking at him.
In love is conversation. Over coffee, in bed, on the phone, at parties and gatherings when they should be socializing with other people. They talk themselves through physical intimacy, through Kurt's freshman year, through first jobs and arguments and moving in together. They talk about anything and everything, from music to clothes to sex to that fight Blaine had with his dad last night and whether they're ready for kids. They're open and honest and really, they don't just talk - they communicate. They laugh and listen and learn from each other and somehow it never gets old.
In love is getting married. The fact that they can. Blaine on one knee. The rings, the wedding, the vows that they write themselves. The only time Kurt will ever voluntarily let someone smear cake on his face. Burt in tears, their first dance, and the entire glee club (plus Mr. Schue and Miss Pillsbury) in attendance. In love is being able to call each other "husband" for the rest of their lives.
In love is jackets. The Dalton blazers and the coat Blaine lent to Kurt when he was cold on their second date, that leather jacket of Blaine's that always gets Kurt riled up and the bright red raincoat Kurt was wearing when he greeted Blaine at the airport on his first visit to New York.
In love is coffee. Because their relationship starts over coffee and drinking it together becomes something of a tradition for them. They talk over coffee, laugh over coffee, and fight over coffee. The Lima Bean will always hold special meaning for them, but they seek out special coffeehouses everywhere they go. For a while, Kurt flat out refuses to get a coffee machine because he so enjoys their coffee dates. They eventually compromise, venturing out to their favorite coffee place on Saturday mornings and drinking coffee in bed on Sundays. Sitting in bed with a steaming hot cup of coffee and Blaine beside him reading the Times out loud really isn't so bad, Kurt decides.
In love is honesty. Because they have always been and will always be brutally honest with each other. In love is saying what they want and asking for what they need, putting it all on the table even when it might mean hurting each other's feelings. No lies, no bullshit. They tell it like it is and they're stronger for it.
In love is fighting. They're generally pretty good about talking through their problems rationally, but Blaine has a temper and Kurt has a flair for the dramatic and sometimes things get a bit out of hand. They bicker about little things and fight over the big stuff, like Chandler and long distance and whether Blaine should take that job in Boston. One night in Blaine's senior year they almost break up because the pressure of it all is getting to be too much and really, are high school relationships meant to last into adulthood? In love is yelling and desperate tears and the moment they realize that rather than fighting with each other, they should be fighting like hell to make this work. And they do.
In love is smells. Blaine's cologne and Kurt's shampoo and the laundy detergent they use when they start doing their laundry together. The scent of their apartment and the nights they pass out tangled together in a bedroom that smells like sex. In love is the Kurt-smelling sweatshirt that Blaine wears when he misses him and the comfort of simply breathing each other in.
In love is dinner dates. At Breadstix, mostly, but then everywhere when they get to New York. The little French place where they have a favorite booth and the Italian restaurant where they saw Neil Patrick Harris. They're up for trying pretty much anything, as long as it's reasonably priced. In love is sneaking bites of each other's meals, splitting dessert, and arguing over who gets to pay. Ordering for each other and holding hands across the table if they're feeling particularly lovey.
In love is the sex. Their first time - the way they're both shaking, the whispered reassurances, the intertwined breathless ecstasy and barely restrained desperation of the early days, when everything is new and terrifying and amazing all at the same time. In love is the spectacular awkwardness and bright red faces of learning how to talk about it, of figuring out mechanics and positions and what feels good. The first time Kurt says something dirty in bed and the way Blaine comes exactly 3 seconds later. They fuck fast, slow, rough, gentle, sensual and romantic or kinky and raw. They explore and get comfortable and fall deeply, deeply in love with each other's bodies. It never has been and never will be just sex with them - it's trust and passion and want and always, always love.
In love is holding hands under the table.
In love is movie nights. Pajamas, popcorn, and a collection of DVDs ranging from Oscar winners to horror flicks to every Disney movie ever made. Curled up on the couch, limbs tangled together, laughing and singing along and quoting their favorite lines. Occasionally hitting pause for a bit of heavy petting. They love to go out, love to be social and see friends and stay out til 3 AM getting up to all kinds of ridiculousness - especially once they get to New York. But when it comes down to it, it's the nights in, just the two of them, that are their favorites.
In love is their family - all of them, not just the blood relatives. Burt and Carole, who by 5 years into their relationship have virtually become surrogate parents to Blaine. Blaine's actual parents they try to keep their distance from, though Mrs. Anderson makes a real effort with the grandchildren and that becomes a healing point for her and Blaine. Finn, who they become closer to than Kurt had ever dreamed, and Cooper, who is just as accepting and well-intentioned as he is idiotic and self-absorbed. Their two beautiful chlidren (a girl and a boy, three years apart), who bring more joy to their life than they ever could have imagined. Rachel and Santana, who are also in New York and with whom they spend countless weekends getting drunk and having fun in ways only a group of broke 20 year-olds can. Mercedes, who they Skype with as often as possible, and Tina, who becomes one of Blaine's closest friends during their senior year of high school. Wes and David, who make the trip down from Boston sometimes, and Nick and Jeff, who still insist on calling Kurt for advice on what to wear on dates. A bunch of college friends they accumulate over the years - including a girl who ends up dating Santana and two guys who become their first gay friend couple. They may not all be family according to conventional definitions, but they've never been big fans of conventional anyway.
In love is Blaine smiling because Kurt is smiling.
In love is saying those three words - "I love you." Blaine does it first, almost accidentally (though he's been thinking them in his head for weeks at that point) - the words just kind of slip out in the middle of the Lima Bean and thank God Kurt says them back. For weeks, maybe months, after that it's a thrill every time - to say them, to hear them, to feel that rush of warmth and security that comes with being truly, deeply loved. Sure, the giddy elation goes away after a while, but that warmth never does. In love is Blaine smiling around the words and Kurt sighing them into Blaine's mouth when they're in bed together. Saying them before they go to sleep, over the phone, or sometimes in the middle of the day for no reason at all. The third day of Kurt's freshman year, when he calls Blaine at 2 in the morning just to remind him that he loves him.
In love is Kurt. Fierce, fabulous, ferociously loyal, a bit dramatic at times. Honest, driven, and far too talented to be confined to Lima, Ohio. Stubborn and sensitive and extremely catty when he wants to be - though to be fair, its generally deserved. A hopeless romantic, but also surprisingly kinky once they get comfortable enough with each other to explore that. The most kind, compassionate person Blaine has ever met, and also probably the most fashion-savvy. He's beautiful and quirky and so very brave and sometimes Blaine is just completely in awe of him. So sure of who he is, so fully, unapologetically himself all the time, and its a trait Blaine both envies and admires in him. He's perfect for Blaine in ways that Blaine had never realized he needed.
In love is Blaine. Charming, sweet, often cluess but remarkably tender and better at romance than he gives himself credit for. Understanding, patient, and so naturally, disarmingly talented. Far more complicated and conflicted than he seems at first - full of anger and hurt and self-doubt brought on by his father and bullies and a Cooper inferiority complex. Craving an acceptance and a warmth that he finds in Kurt. And so eager to love, to give and trust and share a life. He's strong and passionate and curious, always willing to try and explore and experience new things. He glows with the sincere joy that he takes in music, in Kurt, and in all that life has to offer. He's everything that Kurt ever dreamed of and so much more - the rock that holds his whole world together.
In love is Kurt and Blaine. The life that they've built together, the I love yous, the kisses, the work that goes into maintaining a relationship. The magical moments and the mundane ones. The memories and the hopes for the future. All of the things that make them unique, the influences big and small that have shaped their dynamic, their connection, their particular brand of love. In love is, quite simply, them.
I hope that you are smiling now :).