Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or its characters. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Warnings: there will be talk of abuse and rape. Also this will be a snarry and a cross-dressing fic. Harry will be 16 when he hooks up with Severus. Possible Mpreg.

(AN: Hello Loyal Readers! I must say that I'm surprised to be back so early. Its like a little past midnight and suddenly….BAM! The next chapter is in my head. I literally could NOT wait for tomorrow. Just to remind you, Harry as Esmeralda will be known as 'her' in anyone's POV who isn't Harry or doesn't know that he is Harry. =^-^=

Also dear readers...I HAVE A BETA! Yay! Thank-you everyone who volunteered, i appreciated it. Now, on with the story)




Reading/written word



Harry couldn't help but panic slightly of the appearance of his mate. In the aftershock of the question Harry's thoughts ran wild. 'What would Severus think if he knew? What can I say without revealing the details of my past that will lead to him discovering my true identity? For that matter, how will Severus react to finding out I'm Harry Potter?'

Harry gazed at his older mate trying to control his thoughts but the winged male's panic kept building. Despite the fact that Harry wasn't as mentally scarred by his past as before, the younger man couldn't help but fear that if Severus was aware of his freakish past then the older man would walk out, leaving Harry alone and abandoned. 'How can I answer? I wouldn't survive if he left.'

Scenarios of what would happen if Severus found out the truth filled Harry's head. The future pain that was sure to come bled through from what Harry believed to be the future into the present. An ache steadily started to fill Harry's chest as his thoughts grew darker and darker.

"Well." The dark voice of his mate pulled Harry out of his thoughts.

"I-I don't want to talk about it." Harry moved away from the table, and consequently, his mate in a bid to put more space between them. Hearing a growl behind him, the young cross-dresser started to turn before his hand was grabbed and Harry was yanked into Severus' strong arms.

The feeling of safety and contentment that those arms gave Harry, allowed him to relax slightly. Slowly the raven's thoughts calmed and his troubles seemed to melt away. Secured and held gently yet solidly to his mate's defined chest, Harry couldn't have been happier. The last shades of panic subsided as Severus' reassuring heartbeat pulsed under Harry's hand.

"Love," Severus' voice rumbled in Harry's ear sending pleasant shocks shooting down the young man's back. "You need to talk about this, you have to trust me. I am your mate; nothing you will tell me could cause me to leave you."

Harry glanced up into Severus' eyes and was lost; the older man's dark orbs seemed to hypnotize and search out Harry's very soul pulling it out into the open for all to see. The feeling was as freeing as it was unsettling. Never before had Harry had such a feeling of intimacy, and for it to have come from a look was mindboggling. Everything was new, amazing, scary, and so natural that Harry got lost in the chaotic energies of his mind and soul. The only thing he was sure of, though, was the tether that grounded him; his mate.

Despite the voice in his mind warning him that this was a bad idea, Harry nodded. He will put his trust in Severus, cause to not do so hurt too much.

+*+…...SNAPE'S POV…...+*+

Severus could see the dizzying amount of emotions that played in Esmeralda's eyes from his question. The pain and fear were so powerful that Severus was sure he could feel them as well.

The older man watched as his little mate panicked and tried to escape from the situation. The fear of losing his precious one caused the dark male to snarl as he quickly grabbed his mate, weary of her wings, and pulled Esmeralda to him. Weary of Esmeralda leaving, of running away caused Severus to tighten his arms around her, preventing her from escape. Severus held his mate securely in his arms till she calmed, placing her hand over his heart.

"Love," Severus spoke to his skittish mate "You need to talk about this, you have to trust me. I am your mate; nothing you will tell me could cause me to leave you." Through whatever may come, Severus was in no doubt that his place was at her side; as her shield and her blanket, her lover and friend. Esmeralda was his to protect, his to cherish, and to keep her he will endure anything. 'Nothing will chase me from her side; nothing she does, says, or believes she has earned.'

Esmeralda looked up and searched his eyes for any hint of…well Severus didn't really know what. Severus held his breath as he waited for his little one to respond. If she rejected him, Severus feared how he would survive. Having tasted the hope of love, of family, the very thought of it being taken away was…..was too horrible for words.

The moment Esmeralda nodded her head and agreed to trust him, Severus released a breath, placing his forehead on her shoulder as relief filled him. His releif was so uplifting, that Severus felt as if he was the one with wings.

Turning and nuzzling his mate's neck, Severus whispered his thanks. "I'll never betray you my love" placing a kiss under her ear he nearly smiled when his actions caused his Esmeralda to quiver in his arms. "I swear."


(AN: short chapie. Next one will be longer)