December 5, 1825
It's been three days since my return to the Land of the Dead, and also, three days, since I've last seen my true love, Victor.
Miss Plum told me that it might be a good idea to keep a journal. To write down the feelings that I need to get out. I thought I'd give it a try. It might get my mind off of Victor. Off of how much I miss him. The pain is far worse than the pain Lord Barkis had caused me when he had killed me. Maybe because I was young and foolish back then. And because he hadn't been my true love. But being separated by your true love can really leave a hole in your heart.
I've locked myself in my small little cottage. The first moment that everyone had gotten transported back to the Land of the Dead, I had run here, the pain so strong and fresh. It hasn't subsided at all.
I simply just cried and cried three days straight. I still am crying. Tears running down my face and staining these color faded pages. I would have kept sobbing in bed. It wasn't till I was interrupted by a small knock on my door. No one had been there. Just this journal and a note attached to it from Miss Plum saying,
I don't write in journals myself, but I've heard it helps a lot in tough times. If you ever need to talk to someone, you know where to find me.
She wasn't totally wrong. It does feel a bit good to write all my feelings down. It's better than just simply crying all the time. I remember I used to keep a journal when I was living. I wonder where that is…either it is lost somewhere in the Land of the Living or father has it. I haven't seen him much since he came down here…he doesn't live really close by though. I wish he could meet Victor…he would have loved Victor and I know Victor would have loved him. They would have gotten along so well.
I'm not sure if the news had gotten to father…the news about Victor. He never shows up to the parties of the new Arrivals and hadn't shown up when Victor came down here or when everyone from the Land of the Dead went 'upstairs' for our wedding…the wedding that never was finished.
I wonder if Victor is alright…I know he must be trying so hard to somehow get back to me. His protectiveness over me up in the Land of the Living proves that. That he really truly does love me. That he cares for me even though I am dead, and he is living.
I can no longer write anymore…I am too tired. Not normal for someone who is dead. Someone who doesn't need to sleep. I guess it is the heart ache.
I do hope this journal will help me….