She sighs, running her hand through her dark brown hair. She's so sick of these thoughts. They never leave her alone. She tries to think of something else, of anything...but there's only one thing on her mind.
Her best friend. The person who's like her sister, and also happens to be the love of her life.
Yes, she loves her.
She knows it's wrong, but she can't help it. If she could get rid of these feelings, she would. She tried, so many times...but all attempts had failed.
She really wishes things weren't this way. She wishes she could see her best friend the same way she sees her. Like a sister. She acts like it, she's a very good actress. She makes everyone believe her act. But her feelings are anything but sisterly.
Every time she sees her best friend, she has to fight the urge to kiss her. She knows it would be a wrong move. It would ruin the amazingly close friendship they have. She can't risk losing that. It's all she's got.
When her best friend isn't looking, she always gazes at her in a certain way. Don't blame her, it's not like she can help it. She's surprised that her looks aren't noticed.
She gets mad whenever she hears her best friend talking about some boy she has a crush on. She knows she shouldn't. Her crush likes boys, like she's supposed to. Unlike her.
She hates herself for having these feelings. Why can't she be normal? That's what she's always asking herself. Even though nobody knows about her feelings, that doesn't change the fact that they are there. And they're killing her. At random times, she feels like screaming: "I LOVE YOU, CECE!"
Every night, before falling asleep, she imagines what it would be like if things were different. If her crush actually liked her back. She imagines the other girl sitting on the bed, right next to her, a loving smile on her face, big brown eyes sparkling in the dark. Of course, they end up in a passionate kiss, their bodies coming closer together. She runs her hand through long, beautiful, red waves, as the girl of her dreams starts unbuttoning her shirt and whispers: "I love you, Rocky."
Then, suddenly, she disappears. The fantasy's over. And she knows it will never come true, but...sometimes it's nice to dream. Even if it can make you cry.
Yes, her eyes are becoming watery. Some tears start falling. It happens often when she's alone.
She has no idea how she's going to deal with the situation for the rest of her life. Yes, the rest of her life. Because she knows it isn't a simple crush that comes and goes. She knows it's love. It's here and it will always be. She loves her.
A/N: Yeah...Sorry if this sucks. Just came up with this and wrote it fast. Anyways, tell me what you think.