I practically jumped into my car and sped off, thinking intently about what Adrian had said to me. "None of us are meant to be or do anything" "We decide what we're going to be" I couldn't help but consider whether there was an ounce of truth in his words. Then I immediately scolded myself, I was always going to be bound to the Alchemists, there was no question, the golden tattoo on my cheek bound me to them for life, or at least until I was killed. That was my life, planned before I was born, trying to escape from that would be like trying to escape from a prison, almost impossible.
I found it difficult to concentrate on the road on my way back, keeping repeating the events from tonight, how quickly things had changed, from looking at the paintings, to having my first 'real' kiss to running away. I then remembered about the bond between Jill and Adrian. He had most certainly been emotional then, there was no doubt she wouldn't have seen that. I sighed and blocked out my thoughts, focussing only on the car and the purr of its engine. I was determined to avoid seeing Jill for as long as possible.
Eventually I made my way to the school and darted to my campus, praying I wouldn't run into her. Luck however was not on my side as I ran into her in the corridor outside my dorm. I sighed again and tried to make my way up the stairs. It became pretty obvious that Jill wasn't going to let me go however as she blocked my pathway. I looked at her, silently begging her to let me go but she remained firm. A small part of me was proud at how far she had advanced in her short time here, she really had adapted from the small talkative yet timid girl to this independent, strong woman. However this wasn't a moment for her to prove her advancement.
"What the hells going on?" My eyebrows rose, I hadn't expected that, in truth though, I didn't know what I had expected.
I was aware there were people in the corridor and already many lingered around us in the hopes of listening in. Sighing yet again I turned and made my way into her room, she quickly followed and shut the door. I scanned around her room and saw that Angeline thankfully wasn't to be found.
As if she saw the question in my eyes she responded "She's out in the cafeteria"
I nodded briefly and considered what she wanted to know. Instead of speaking first I waited for her to say something.
"What's going on with you and Adrian?"
"Nothing." My reply was brief but it was the truth, or at least I would pretend it was the truth. I needed to keep a clear head from now on, I had been too indulgent in myself, I needed to refocus and focus entirely on Jill and our cover, focus on only what my orders were. As I thought that Adrian's words came back to me once more "None of us are meant to be or do anything"
Jill however looked severely unimpressed with my answer. "Sydney I could see everything, you totally blew him off, he really likes you, I mean come on, he wouldn't ever be like that with anyone else and-" I held out my hand. I could sense she was starting to ramble slightly and I knew I would have to stop her.
"You don't understand. It would never work and I don't want it to, I don't want anything to happen at all. We are from completely different worlds, I live in the light, and you live in the dark." A small part of me was reminded of the vampire hunters, I ignored it and continued. "I stand by my beliefs and morals. It isn't right and it isn't natural. It can never happen"
"But you like him too! It's so obvious!"
I hesitated, unsure what to say. I preferred to live my life with facts and figures, things that were definite. Feelings and emotions however was something different. No matter how far I had advanced with my feelings towards Jill I most certainly was not ready to talk to her about this.
I realised my response was a key factor here. I could deny it and carry on my life. I could accept it and destroy all of my life.
Instead I chose another option.
I ignored the question and walked away; remembering the feel of Adrian's lips against mine.