Merlin On Facebook (Series 1)

A/N: What would Merlin look like if everyone in Camelot used Facebook? Read through series 1 of Merlin, whether you laugh or cry at the spupidity is all up to you.

Also, this parody is based in the style of "Harry Potter: Facebook News Feed Edition" by BurstAndBloom91. So if you enjoyed this you should definitely check that one out!

Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin.


Merlin: In Camelot, y'all!

Hunith the Mom and Gaius likes this


Uther Pendragon: MAGIC IS BAD! THOSE WHO PRACTICE MAGIC – OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!

Arthur Pendragon and 1,556 others like this

Morgana, Merlin and Mordred dislike this


Merlin: First impression of Camelot is bad. Very, very bad. How am I suppoused to practice magic now? FML!

Uther Pendragon: WHAT'S THAT, BOY?

Merlin: Ugh, forget I said anything.

Uther Pendragon: Ok.

Merlin: Wonders if Uther really is an idiot, or an ignoramus.

Guinevere likes this


Gaius: Just browing some books! Wonder which one I'm gonna pick today…and whoops, sounds like something broke where I'm standing on! Shouldn't be too bad.

1 second later

Gaius: AND WHOOPS NOW I'M FALLING DOWN! SOMEONE HELP ME

Merlin: Seriously? You're updating your Facebook status even though your head is practically smashed on the floor like mashed potatoes, and you couldn't even use your hands to damp the fall? WTF

Gaius: SOMEONE SAVE ME

Merlin: -.-


Merlin sent Gaius a safe landig

Gaius wrote on Merlin's Wall: I OWE YOU MY LIFE!

Merlin: Nah, it's ok. I'm sure we can agree on something, like you giving me a spellbook and me being very secretive about it.

Gaius: Wut

Merlin: Wat

Gaius gave Merlin a Spellbook

Merlin and Gaius are now friends


Merlin: Watching a snobbish, blonde boy bullying someone sure takes you back to the high school years…. Ah, memories.

Arthur Pendragon: Are you talking about me?

Merlin: I can't see anyone else prancing around like a diva.

Sir Leon: Ooooohh-

Arthur Pendragon: SHUT UP, LEON.

Arthur Pendragon and Merlin are now friends

Arthur Pendragon wrote on Merlin's Wall: Bring it, bitch.

Merlin: ...You honestly did not just add me to your friends requests so that you could fight me! That's so gay.

Arthur Pendragon: Then why did you accept my friend request?

Merlin: Because I thought we were only joking around

Merlin: Douchebag

Arthur Pendragon: THAT'S IT! I want your ass in jail right now!

Merlin: Oooh, whatcha gonna do about it?

Arthur Pendragon: I'm the son of Uther Pendragon, hence the last name. I'd shit my pants if I were you.

Merlin:

Merlin became a fan of Shitting Your Pants in Public

Merlin and Arthur Pendragon are no longer friends.


Gaiuswrote on Merlin's Wall: Glad you're making this easy for me, kid.

Merlin: Sorry :(

Gaius: It's fine, Merlin. Just… don't make it a habit.

Merlin: I won't! It's not like I'm gonna do this on a regular basis

Kilgarrah The Dragonlikes this

Gaius: Ok.

Uther Pendragon likes this


Merlin attended the "Let's Go Fucking Crazy! Throw Some Tomatoes At This Pathetic Boy!"

Merlin: Gonna need heaps of conditoner to get these things out of my hair, ugh….

Guinever: Hi! I'm Guinevere, but most people call me Gwen.

Merlin: HOLY SHIT WHERE DID YOU COME FROM WHAT IS THIS SORCERY

Guinevere: Relax! I just wanted to, um, say that um, what you did was great! You know, standing up to Arthur and everything. But um…

Merlin:

Guinevere: We all know that you of all people couldn't possibly slap the shit out of him. Look at you! So weak and frail

Merlin:

Guinevere: But hey, at least you're okay!^^

Merlin: Wow. You're terrible at flirting.

Guinevere: PSSH! I wasn't flirting with you! It's just in my nature to be this nice. CAN'T YOU SEE HOW CUTE I AM?

Merlin: S-sure.

Merlin and Guinevere are now friends


Lady Helen: How very OMINOUS of me to arrive at Camelot at this particularly late hour.

Uther Pendragon: I see no wrong in this!

Lady Helen: You never do…

Uther Pendragon: LET'S GO EAT SOME STRAWBERRIES!

Lady Helen: All according to plan


Arthur Pendragon poked Merlin

Merlin wrote on Arthur Pendragon's wall: Hey, dipshit!

Arthur Pendragon: You can't address me like that!

Merlin: Aw, you gonna cry?;)

Arthur's Friends In The Background: Not sure if flirting or being serious.

Arthur Pendragon: Do you know how to walk on your knees?

Arthur's Friends In The Background: 'Kay, definitely flirting-

Arthur Pendragon: WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP! C'mon Merlin, let's do this mano a mano!

Merlin: I just had a manicure… but we'll do this again! Shit's not over yet.

Arthur Pendragon: FINE!

Arthur's Friends In The Background became a fan of Merthur

Merlin: ?


Kilgarrah The Dragon wrote on Merlin's wall: MERLIN.

Merlin: Who the hell are you?

Kilgarrah The Dragon: It is I – the great slash dragon! I've come to your guidance.

Merlin: Wha-

Kilgarrah The Dragon: You and Arthur are both sides of the same coin. Write that up cuz I'm not repeating that ever again.

Merlin: This is some serious bullshit. I hate Arthur and everything he stand for. I even like Uther more than him.

Kilgarrah The Dragon: MERLIN!

Merlin: Would you stop that? I guess I really don't have any say in this…

Hunith The Mom likes this

Merlin and Kilgarrah The Dragon are now friends


Gaius wrote on Merlin's wall: I've got some chores for you today.

Merlin: Cut me some slack, would you.

Gaius: Seriously? This is the first assignment I'm giving you.

Merlin: Ugh, fine! Just don't make it a habit.

Gaius: -.-


Merlin: Well this is rather awkward. Not everyday a boy walks into a room with a woman in it. (sent from mobile)

Morgana: Gwen?

Merlin: Are everyone as stupid as Uther? I'm obviously Merlin, not Gwen.

Morgana: *this goes on for a while*

Merlin: Nice ass though.

Guinevere: Merlin? This is in no way creepy.

Merlin: Laterzz


Very Pale Servant Girl wrote on Lady Helen's wall: brought u some snacks! Jk lolol tthey're just fruits

Lady Helen: I should kill you just for the hell of it. I do hate it when blonde women can't spell.

Very Pale Servant Girl: wuzz tha?

Very Pale Servant Girl is now Offline

Lady Helen: Craving an apple now.


Uther Pendragon, Arthur Pendragon and 503 others are attending "Lady Helen's Concert" (Tickets sold out!)

Uther Pendragon: This shall be fun! Everyone, have a seat and enjoy the show. This woman is in no way creepy.

Merlin: I'll just stay here in the corner. Sigh…


Lady Helen: Lalalalalala *does a really cool opera voice that can in no way fit into this*

Uther Pendragon, Arthur Pendragon and 503 others are now Offline

Merlin: I may not be the brighest bulb in the bush, but I don't think a song is suppoused to make everyone fall asleep!


Merlin sent Lady Helen a falling chandelier

Lady Helen: Ugh…

Uther Pendragon, Arthur Pendragon and 503 others are now Online

Arthur Pendragon: THE HELL JUST HAPPENED? THE HELL IS THIS? THE HELL ARE YOU?

Lady Helen sent a FLYING DAGGER OF DOOM in Arthur Pendagon's direction

Arthur Pendragon: Not the face!

Merlin: Not my destiny!

Merlin saved Arthur Pendragon's life

Lady Helen is now Offline


Uther Pendragon wrote on Merlin's wall: You just saved my son's life!

Merlin: No shit, shitlock.

Arthur Pendragon: I suppouse I should thank you…

Uther Pendragon: As a token of my appreciation, I hereby order you to be Arthur's manservant.

Merlin: BUT

Arthur Pendragon: BUT

Uther Pendragon: No butts!

Merlin: FML

Arthur Pendragon sent Merlin a murderous glare

A/N: SO, what did you all think? I was thinking of making a parody of every episode, so there'll be 13 chapters.

-NoNewsIsGoodNews