CHAPTER FOURTEEN: FIRST LIGHT.
When the morning came, Rory was up before the first light. As she pocked outside her door, she saw the most amazing thing. The sun was rising, lighting up the dark sky. Rory opened the window and let the wind hit her slowly. Brushing her hair off her face, tickling the tip of her nose. Blocking all memories of the night before, images dancing in circles when she closed her eyes, forcing her to keep them open. Rory had to move on, she couldn't stay there, although she wish she could. Staying in the morning light, felt like heaven. Facing Tristan, seemed impossible. She could feel it in the pit of her stomach; everything was about to change. Everything.
Jess had just left Yale. Dean was in Stars Hollow, and to be married soon. Tristan was here, close by. In her eighteen years of life, Rory had loved only twice. Dean and Jess. Jess and Dean. Tristan had been an enemy from Chilton. He was a friend at Yale. The transition had been a challenge, but Rory was glad to count Tristan as one of his friend. She wished that he hadn't changed their relationship last night. She wished things were simple. That they could go back and change it, but they couldn't.
Rory had class with Tristan in twenty minutes. She thought about skipping. She thought about leaving. Going back to Stars Hollow. She thought about a million things. She wanted to disappear; the avoid dealing with the situation she was in. True was; she didn't know what she wanted. She didn't know if she could be with Tristan, ever. She didn't know if she even wanted to. She had all these questions, running around in her mind, and no answers. Rory sighed. She didn't want to have to decide anything right now. She knew that she wanted Tristan as her friend, but as her boyfriend. She didn't know. She had been thinking way to hard.
Paris came back from the washroom. She was humming which was unusual for her roommate. The last couple of weeks, she had been pretty down. Jaime had broke up with her, to pursue a relationship with an older woman, his teacher. Paris greeted Rory;
"Hey! You are awake.", she said, "Aren't you going to be late for class?"
"Hum-no, not really. I think I'll just, ditch.", Rory admitted.
Paris' eyes widen; "Really?", she said, "But, you never miss a class. We never miss a class!"
Rory gasped. Maybe she should have lied to Paris. But, she knew that Paris always saw right through her and that she really couldn't lie to her without her knowing. She hated and loved that about her friend.
"I know.", Rory said, "I just don't feel like it."
Paris sighed; "Well, fine.", she replied, "I'm going to get going. I'll see you later."
Paris left shortly afterwards, leaving Rory free to go back to over-thinking about her life, the choices she had to make and the relationship she wanted to lead.
Rory had hoped the avoid Tristan as long as she didn't know what she wanted to do about him, and about what happened. However, it looked like she wasn't going to be able to do it. Tristan was standing right in front of her. Eager for her to respond to his questions. Eager to know, what was going to happen between them. Rory didn't have any answers for him. She still didn't know. She was still in the dark, while he was trying to hang on the moment that they shared.
"Long time, no see.", he said, his hands in his pockets.
Rory gasped. His stare on her, was making her feel so uncomfortable.
"I know.", she replied.
"I think that we should set things straight.", Tristan said.
Rory looked at him. He was dashing in his charcoal turtleneck and his jeans. His hair were as messy as they could be.
"We don't have to.", Rory responded.
"I think I need to.", Tristan admitted, "Maybe you don't, but I have to."
Rory looked down at her tan mid-heel shoes. Her hands were sweating. She hide them behind her back. It was a desperate attempt to not look nervous.
"I-hum-I like you Rory.", he said,"I really really like you."
Rory cleared her throat, but didn't say anything. After a while, Tristan crossed his arms on his chest.
"Don't you have anything to say...?", he added.
When Rory remained silent, he started walking around in circles.
"Rory!", Tristan shouted, "Say something. Please..."
Rory felt bad for Tristan. He deserved an answer. She just couldn't give one to him already.
"I'm sorry, Tristan.", she said after a while, "I just need to think about it, some more."
Tristan walked up to her. He put his hands on her shoulder. He could feel her shivering. He gently squeezed her shoulders, to reassure her. Rory left up her blue eyes to look at him. His eyes were as clear as she'd ever seen them. They were like the sea, peaceful and comforting. Rory immediately looked away, scared that she didn't, she would get lost into his eyes. Which was dangerous for her. She couldn't loose control. She just couldn't.
"I thought we talk about that already.", he said, "Go with your guts."
Rory bite her bottom lip. Tristan backed away from her. He looked at her for a long moment and smiled.
"I'm going to go.", he said, before turning his back and started walking down the hall.
Rory felt this intense feeling. She didn't want him to leave. She wanted him to stay here, with her. That's all that she knew. She started running after Tristan. When she catch up, she called up his name. Out of breath, she embrace Tristan and kissed him. He burst in laughter;
"Finally," he said, " Mary..."
Rory started laughing; "Don't you call me Mary, ever again."
Rory and Tristan embraced tighter as they resumed their kiss. For the first time, Rory felt like everything was falling into places. Everything was right, again. Just like things were the way they were suppose to be. Like she was meant to be with Tristan, right here, right now. Relieved, Rory allowed herself to be completely with Tristan, her mind was free of questioning. She had all the answers she ever asked herself. She finally had some light on her life.