A/N: My friend and I thought of the concept, I replaced the characters with the South Park characters. Enjoy! (Note, I'm not trying to be racist in this).
Episode One: Grocery Thugs
Where criminals attempt to break the law, the FBI JUSTICE LEAGUE will be there! Where danger calls and dames scream, the FBI JUSTICE LEAGUE will be there! Remember citizens of South Park, Colorado, you are never alone. We, children of the future, of your and our future, will stand at your side in honor of protecting your worthless lives. Because we do not care, really for your health or the benefit of doing good deeds. We only care about ourselves, not your crack babies or how pathetic-
"Cartman!" Kyle shouted, slamming down the piece of paper. "What the hell is this crap?"
"Why Kahl, it's our article proclaiming our existence of being the town's newest team, of assisting the law force." Eric answered innocently, clasping his hands together. "Is something the matter?"
"Yes it is! You're purposely advertising us the wrong way! You make it sound as if we are selfish and we're insulting our fellow people! Stan! Read it for yourself!"
As the redhead bickered at the brunette, who couldn't give a damn, Stan received the shoved paper and began reading it. The gang: Eric, Kyle, Stan, and Kenny were inside Marsh's bedroom.
They were momentarily working on how to show themselves to the world, in a more proper fashion. The first time they did, it was The Coon and Friends. They were only in 4th grade then, now they're too 'big' and 'mature' for playing superheroes. Now in 5th grade, playing FBI was another story. The gang considered all the cool and kick-ass guns they could use, and how 'secretive' they could be. However, if they were to be secret, why would they writing an article? Cartman wanted to be famous like Obama, that's why. This is how it breaks down:
Kyle is the investigator. With his high knowledge of computers and excellent way of searching and figuring out problems, what better job for him is to detect? Stan's job is weaponry, which is everyone's job but he has to exceed in it. Stan has the respect of attaining their weapons from his Uncle Jimbo, and teaching his friends how to use them correctly. Kenny's position is to spy mysteriously, for you can't see his face behind that orange parka. He can slyly walk around in different disguises, accustomed to his face being hidden. For Eric, he is the persuader. This kid will manipulate you into doing anything he wants, you better not forget it.
"Fat turd!" Kyle yelled, continuing his rant.
"It's not my fault you're a koshertarian while I'm a carnivore." Cartman retaliated. "Some people just live worse than others."
"I'll rip off your head!"
"Kahl, you and I know how much Jews hate blood. So let us all settle down before you release your Jersey side."
"Uhm, Cartman?" Stan spoke up, sitting next to Kenny who was blocking their arguing out. "Kyle's right, this article isn't very legitimate for our image."
"Ah, come on! Mah article is just fine, don't you think so Kinny?"
The blond pulled down his part hood, to speak. "Yes."
"KENNY! You always agree with him!" Kyle complained angrily. Before he could say more, their radio they were using announced a robbery at the South Park Bank and Jewelry store.
"Finally, some action!" Eric got off the bed. "Armor up and follow me men!"
Armoring up, consisted of jamming silly spray, water guns, and pop snappers into their backpacks. The gang hoped to get more sensible weapons to fight against the rebellious once Stan could sneak into his uncle's tool shed. Outside Kyle, Cartman and Stan hopped on their bikes. Kenny, too poor to afford one, rode on his little sister's barbie scooter. These, were their vehicles.
"HA!" The fat one cackled. "Kinny looks like a gay wuss!"
"Fuck you." He said. "At least the scooter doesn't tip over when I put my weight on it, buttlicker."
"Guys, can we stop?" Stan groaned. "We need to get there and help before the cops still our spotlight!"
"Yeah, I don't know about ya'll, but I'm gone." With that Kyle sped of, pedaling quick. He was the fastest of the FBI JUSTICE LEAGUE. The others were behind them.
As they neared the market, a man in all black with a ski mask carrying large bags tripped. Spilling over valuable merchandise as of pearls, money, gold, silver, and such.
"Damn it!" The stranger cursed.
"Wait guys! This citizen needs our help!" Cartman stepped on the breaks, along with the blond and raven. The redhead gawked at what they were doing.
"Here you go sir," Stan smiled. "Here's your heavy bag of cash you dropped."
"And here's your shiny expensive jewelry." Kenny handed him the package.
"You also dropped some other priceless silver too." Eric handed him the bag.
The stranger blinked at the kids, shrugged and ran off. Kyle fumed.
"YOU IDIOTS! THAT WAS THE THIEF!"
"How can you tell?"
"Gah, oh my gosh!" Kyle picked up the nearest biggest rock he could see, and chucked it at the robber's head. Perfect aim as always. The man collapsed to the ground. "There!"
"KAHL! I was suppose to do that!" Cartman spatted. "Jews just keep takin' and takin' from the white men!"
"Kids," an officer came behind them, "who in the world hit that man! He was bringing us most of the prized possessions to safety!"
The whole gang pointed their gaze at Kyle, who was blushing in embarrassment.
"...Y-you mean, he wasn't a r-robber...?"
"No, of course not! Why would you think that, simply because he was wearing a ski mask?"
"Well guys, looks like Kahl's going to jail!"
Looks as if they gang will have difficulty to be heroes for their town. However, they shall prevail!
I tried making this as close as the real show, so please tell me if I did a good job or how I could improve on it. Also please review, do you have any ideas what the gang should do for the next episodes?