Pein da Pimp:

A/N: Ok, warning, kinky-ness, there will be smut later (yaoi mainly, yuri and whatever else you guys wanna read) Hope you like! Please review and be nice to the new girl! Thanks…

Disclaimer: I am no one. I own nothing.

The gorgeous ginger man strode across the dark red carpets of his establishment. His shined black Italian shoes crushed the rose petals and black glitter that littered his floor as he continued down the candlelit hallway, following the familiar path which was leading him closer to the thrumming base pounding numbly through the walls and floor. Everything about him shouted to the onlookers that he was rich, successful, experienced, desired and, above all else, badass. You wouldn't want to mess with him, but you couldn't stop staring either. The powerful air about him demanded lust, respect and a healthy dose of fear from women and men alike.

He walked with purpose, moving swiftly from room to room. He passed through the "Whore Chambers" of his building, listening with a glint in his hard, rippled eyes as moans and grunts echoed down this hallway from various occupied bedrooms. Only one thing pleased him more than happy paying customers; and that was why he was walking so fast. Good thing he had had his dark designer suit tailored to disguise arousals.

The man stopped briefly at the bar in his next room, climbing the small set of stairs to reach a bird's-eye view of his palace. Previous parts of the manor were lit with candles and roaring fires. In these the only sounds to be heard were husky moans or giggles of pleased patrons, and a little background music; this area however, a slightly pricier area, was more high-tech.

Lasers and lava lamps were the only illumination provided for the otherwise light-less room. It was a breath-taking light show. The majority of this space was like a club with three raised podiums for three different types of fun. From the bar situated at the back of the space Pein- among eleven other men enjoying the show from afar- had the ideal vantage point. He watched with a cold face yet startlingly hungry eyes as they feasted on the gyrating bodies bellow and above; there were three large metal cages hanging from the ceiling.

The one closest to the bar was like a huge bird cage, containing one of his best and most popular employees; Deidara. The blonde was wearing nothing but a pair of tight dark red leather trousers and nail polish. He was putting on quite a show, rolling his head so his long blonde hair swayed and shimmered in the neon lights. It was strange how, despite being locked in a bird cage the way that sexy young man arched and flexed his lovely, toned body resembled a feline as opposed to anything with wings. The tanned man gripped the poles of his suspended prison and swayed that tight-looking ass longingly to what sounded like Blood on the Dance Floor.

Sometimes they had rock bands perform where the DJ was now- quite famous people and groups too. These people tended to prefer having their pay in free memberships, shows and treats from the talented young men and women who worked here- as opposed to actual money. They never spoke of this place however. It was similar to the Playboy Mansion (they even had bunny girls), but more hard-core and very illegal…

One level further underground you could find a schizophrenic man with green hair selling a wide variety of drugs and weapons. He needed the help of their financial manager; Kakuzu, to deal with the business however because he was totally mad thanks to the coke and cannabis. Not only did Zetsu have two completely different personalities but he believed himself to be part plant. He also thought the entire organisation Pein had created consisted of evil ninjas and Pein was the God of them all who controlled the rain along with six different bodies. Zetsu thought his best friend Nagato (one of the few people who knew his real name) somehow controlled him and the other bodies because they all had the same eyes. The orange haired man explained time and time again that just because the other ginger people were the heads of the other buildings they owned didn't in any way mean they could read each other's minds through something called "Rinnegan" because the eyes were contacts they used for effect (he actually had chocolate brown eyes) and Nagato managed the much-less-naughty club upstairs on the ground floor: Akatsuki.

Zetsu insisted that his fellow workers at Akatsuki –Tobi and Madara- were the same person. They had been in the same room once so he passed one off as a "shadow clone" and proceeded to slash as it with a knife insisting if he stayed still and let him stab the terrified Uchiha he would explode into a puff of smoke. It had taken Madara, Pein, Nagato and Kakuzu to stop the insane druggy from killing Tobi. The green haired man claimed to also hear Pein's voice in his head sometimes, which had led to their leader asking Kakuzu if perhaps they should send him to see a psychiatrist. The scarred man insisted Zetsu was far beyond help and this actually benefitted the business: nobody would dare mess around with not paying that crazy bastard. There was a rumour that the crack-head had even eaten a delivery boy because he had arrived late with the goods. Pein shuddered at the memory; he had been finding frozen body parts in the fridge and freezer for weeks after innocently seeking out a sandwich or some ice-cream.

"Um… H-here you are, sir," a shy voice stuttered, handing him a dark purple coloured drink.

Pein took his usual gratefully, eyeing the busty barmaid appreciatively as the liquid burned down his throat and deep in his belly- just the way he liked it. The glass clinked as he placed it back onto the counter. There was a pretty blush on her cute, pale face as she hurriedly refilled it. Her navy blue hair was tied into long twin plaits with white ribbons. She was dressed as a French maid and, by the look in her large pearly eyes, was feeling extremely exposed.

Perfect, her orange haired boss thought with a smirk, she has fetish written all over her.

"Hinata," a blue haired woman addressed her in a cold voice as she clacked up the steps in black leather lace-up boots that finished mid-thigh. Pein made a mental note to compliment Konan on her exquisite, erotic fashion sense. Tonight she was a dominatrix; black leather corset, matching panties, choker, gloves (which finished at the elbows) and she was even clasping a long black whip in her left hand.

"It's almost time for your pole dance in the burlesque room."

"B-but what about the bar?" the Hyuga asked. "Ino was-"

"Don't worry, I'm covering Miss Yamanaka's shift." The leather-clad lady pulled herself onto the bar and swung her legs over, making a show of arching her body as she landed on the other side with a click from her heels.

"O-okay, thank you, Konan-san," Hinata mumbled.

As the girl made her way out from behind the bar Konan grinned and playfully cracked her whip at the maid's feet. Hinata jumped with a cry as the other men around the bar laughed. She left quickly, her cheeks a deep magenta whilst hurrying down the steps and through a corridor leading to one of the front rooms in this large establishment.

"Are my costumes to your liking?" Konan smirked at her ginger business partner and best friend.

"Of course," Pein licked the remnants of alcohol from the rim of his glass. "That's why we call you Kinky Konan."

She laughed and refilled his drink before attending to the other patrons whilst leaning over to expertly display her body as they told her stories and she pretended to find them interesting whilst folding napkins into cranes and adding the occasional witty comment here and there.

"So, Sexy-san," a regular; Kotetsu, asked shamelessly, "What will it take for you let me fuck you over this counter?"

She leaned over closer, grinning and glancing at Pein as she let her breasts rest on the surface.

"What do you think that'll cost this stud, Boss?" She slid a hand slowly through his thick dark hair. "He's been an awfully good customer you know…"

"Hmm, Konan's a pro so bending her over the bar, degrading her in front of everyone for however long it takes her to satisfy you will be…" Pein frowned at the excited man and stated his price; the amount so high he almost fell off his barstool.

"I-I don't have that…" he mumbled sadly.

Konan patted him on the head and flicked a black business card at him. It was still warm when Kotetsu picked it up since that had been nestled between her left breast and the corset. It was a small rectangle with a single red cloud as the company logo with a number in shiny scarlet italics along the bottom.

"Call me when you do. Ask for Konan." She winked and refilled his drink.

Pein smirked as he downed his drink at the hopeful look in Kotetsu's eyes. Konan came over and refilled the glass.

"So… why isn't Ino where she should be?"

Konan rolled her eyes, "Don't take that tone with me. My girls are doing fine. Ino was requested to do a bunny-girl show," she explained, pointing towards the roaring, bouncing ocean of people with her whip.

Sure enough the pale blonde girl was wearing a white bunny girl costume. She had finished her dance and was guiding a chubby man onto the raised circular podium and sat him on a chair. He watched like a child on Christmas morning as the slut bunny circled the chair playfully before seating her fluffy tailed rear on his lap and began grinding. The blonde took his hands and placed them one on her right breast and the other on her left hip. He began squeezing and moving her as he pleased.

Pein scanned the rest of the huge room with a satisfied gleam in his ravenous eyes. Men and women drank and danced as Pein's employees did their best to keep them entertained. A DJ at the front of the room had a pink haired tart on her knees behind the decks as he thrust into her eager mouth in time with the beat of his techno, watching the same erotic scene as Pein was but from a different angle... and with a hot young throat swallowing his arousal. Glitter and glow sticks littered the crowd and floor, their bodies grinding and bouncing to the music as they watched the podiums, fascinated eyes clouded with lust.

There were three podiums and three cages; the first podium –the one closest to the DJ at the front of the room- was where you could find a brunette girl dressed as a naughty school girl, skirt pulled up, shirt unbuttoned and lying atop of a pile of pillows, masturbating. Next there was Ino, continuing to give the large, eager boy one hell of a lap dance. Standing atop the third raised column was a man; Kakashi Hatake. He was expertly pleasing the crowd with an incredible break dance and strip tease, teasingly shedding clothes and carelessly tossing them into the writhing crowd surrounding him and worshipping his toned, gorgeous body.

Above the crowd was the trio of cages. Deidara continued to prowl back and forth in a sexual, predatory manner, proving to be a professional at showing off his fabulous body whilst eye-fucking the shit out of random people he caught staring at him from bellow. There was another blonde in a cage up there too. He seemed to be practising martial arts rather than actually dancing, but it fit to the music and provided excellent advertisement for his services. The whiskered, younger blonde was wearing an orange pair of baggy trousers. He stretched up and spread his arms slowly, showing off his excellent physique and interesting tattoo decorating his stomach, slowly turning, flexing his muscles. He held a high kick before swinging it around with exaggerated slowness, turning and changing fighting stances. He threw mock punches and kicks in artistic combinations to the rhythm. It was dramatic and cool in a sexy kind of way.

As the music slowed slightly the blonde reached down and pressed both palms against the floor whilst keeping his legs straight. He pushed himself off the floor with his hands, holding a handstand. The tanned blonde made several push ups from this position, sweat glistening in the laser lights as it ran down his gorgeous body and dripped off his focused face. The blonde then moved one hand aside, using one arm to support all his weight as he held the other out to the side of his body, fist clenched and shaking from exertion. He held still after ten more push-ups, this time one handed, before moving his hands and turning his body whilst splitting his legs and swivelling. He turned a flip and landed in a different fighting pose, shaking the cage. He gripped the bars above him and began doing pull-ups.

And finally there was a woman. She appeared to be trapped in a cube shaped cage closer to Deidara's than the younger blonde's. She was wearing nothing but an open tan trench coat and had been shackled by her wrists to the bars of her cage as various snakes wound their way around the prison and her body. Her pale brown eyes squeezed tightly shut and her dark violet, spiky hair splayed around her blushing face. She arched and squirmed as the serpents, large and small, wound their way around her long, nicely shaped legs, waist, breasts and neck. She was an excellent actress with a pretty crying face as the creatures continued to molest her, creeping into the sleeves of her jacket and flicking their tongues at her pretty, pert nipples; she arched her head away as a shiny black one slid around her neck. She groaned and raised her hips as a snake of deep green, about the width of a human arm, slithered its way around her thigh and then between her legs. She raised her ass off the metal floor, shuddering as the creature slid between her folds and ventured on between her ass-cheeks. The woman shivered.

Pein looked away feeling satisfied and very proud to have created such a naughty paradise and share it with so many enthusiastic, paying perverts. He looked back to Konan who was polishing a goblet.

"How are your girls doing in? I haven't checked up on your department for a while… Do I need to?"

Konan rolled her toffee-coloured eyes. "My girls are excellent. The ones we've employed are ridiculously talented- for example that girl who just left? Hinata, she's incredible at pole art-"

"Pole dancing," Pein corrected.

"Trust me; she makes it an art form. It's beautiful, like nothing I've ever seen. She's so flexible! Right now she's probably finished her show in the burlesque room and is in her own element before everyone in the atrium. She's like a pole-dancing, ninja, ballerina gymnast!"

Pein chuckled shaking his orange head. "Where do you find these girls?"

The blue haired dominatrix smiled proudly, "Hinata… her father actually paid me to take her away. That douche bag's a big fan of our boys and girls for hire. He pretends they're servants when they visit his house, but-"

"Which client is this?" Pein asked curiously.

"Hyuga," Konan spat, remembering the time she had had the misfortune of "providing services" for him.

"Gave her too us as well as a handsome amount of money, probably to ease his conscience. She seemed sad to leave her sister and mother but didn't fight." Konan pouted, "I really like her."

"I can tell."

Konan poked her tongue out at him.

"Shut up, I have a special place in my heart for all my gals. That one up there-" she gestured to the brunette. "I helped her escape from the circus. She was being sexually abused by one of the lion tamers, the ring leader and the ring leader's son. And that one?"

The blue-haired woman jerked a thumb at a girl by the door, dressed as a cowgirl with her dirty blonde hair in four different ponytails. She was pushing her nicely shaped breasts forward as Zetsu poured some meth into her cleavage and left her with a young man with dark hair in a pineapple-like ponytail. He paid and the green-haired maniac left the couple, blowing a kiss at the girl as the man began snorting between her boobs. Zetsu told himself off for doing this and then argued back.

"She's a runaway- came all the way from Suna. Ino's actually a normal high school student who uses this as a job. Her friend who's letting the DJ fuck her mouth wanted a job here too but she had no skills to offer. She's a slag and has no talent for clenching her lower muscles. Her pussy is the type that's pretty loose even by regular prostitute standards. As for the rest… Most of them escaped from gypsy or just generally abusive homes. This place is a sweet set up for them; we feed them, give them the physical love and attention they deserve, give them a place to sleep and keep them looking pretty."

"Hmm… Well, you made a wise choice about that girl. I want to maintain our reputation of being… how did that guy from the stag do describe it?"

""Sinfully good,"" Madara finished for him, leaning against the bar with a smug look. "Cute outfit, Konan," he added.

"You like?" She did a twirl for the intimidating man who seemed to have appeared from nowhere.

He gave a low whistle and she smirked, "What can I get you?"

"The nearest beer."

She fixed his up a mug of Becks.

"So what's the sexuality forecast of Konan for this evening?" he chugged the entire drink as the woman pursed her black, glossed lips in thought.

"I think right now I am… forty five per cent lesbian fifty five per cent Madara-sexual."

The Uchiha grinned as the blue haired woman leaned over her counter and licked a trail of beer that had escaped from the corner of his lips. She leaned in further, burrowing her pretty face into his thick black locks. She breathed on his ear making him grin evilly.

"I changed my mind…" she growled, "You taste far too bristly."

The man heaved a playful sigh. "By the way, Pein… Itachi's waiting in your office."

At those words the orange haired man both grew instantly hard but also furious. He glared at the larger male seated but a barstool away. There was a tense silence.

"That boy is my personal favourite, Madara." The pierced man stood slowly, dangerously. "I don't like sharing my toys for free."

Madara laughed heartily. "Please, we're related! What sort of person do you think I am?"

Pein raised a pierced eyebrow and left in silence. He made his way through the writhing, gyrating crowd with ease, as if he were Moses and the horny members of his hush-hush club for hard-core pleasure-seekers was the Red Sea.

"I'd stay away from Itachi if I was you, Madara." Konan gave him a serious look. "In primary school Pein had a crush on his teacher but when he found out the man had a girlfriend Pein stalked the woman, killed her pet budgie and left the head in the cage. He posted bits of the bloody bird through her letterbox every morning for a month when he was doing his paper round. They never found out it was him."

"Please," Madara scoffed. "Pein doesn't scare me. Besides, we all know who's really running the show around here."