A/N: OH MY GOSH! I'm alive, and back, and finally writing something! :D Sorry about the utter insanity that is my lack of updates... Things have been crazy, and Writer's Block decided to come knocking... -_- But, hopefully, this has pretty much cured me, and I can get right around to updating "You're Not Alone." I hope you guys enjoy this angsty hurt/comfort Kames Bromance piece, and accept it as an apology. :) Love you all.

COVER ART: Courtesy of CharlieMcCarthey on Deviantart. Piece is titled: "kames: i get nightmares sometimes and i"

Excuse any typos- no Beta, so all mistakes are my own. Italics are dreams/thoughts. ^_^

WARNING: This story contains a bit of mild language and flashbacks/implied past abuse.


Big Time Rush had been in California for almost a year now. By this point, rehearsal schedules were memorized, Gustavo's yelling was tolerated, concerts were regular, and fans worldwide were screaming for their new favorite band. And, as much as the boys wouldn't like to admit it, most of their memories of their life before BTR had been forgotten, or at least pushed to the back of their minds. Every so often, a memory would resurface. Most of the time, they were dreams that they had once had, such as playing professional hockey, or becoming a doctor or model. Other times, however, they were nightmares, of times they had hoped were gone forever...


"Look at me, you little-!" Smack.

Kendall's head snapped back with the force of the blow. He looked up, into the face of his seething, violent, drunk father, going pale as a few tears escaped down his face, and he frantically rubbed them away. Tears were bad. Tears meant more pain.

"Why the Hell can't you do anything right?" Kick. The power of the kick knocked the air from his lungs, slamming into his ribs, sending him gasping for breath on the floor.

"That's where you belong-on the ground! You're worthless, do you hear me? Worthless! I care more about the dirt under my feet than I care about you!"

More kicking barraged into his bruised ribs, and he could have sworn he felt them crack. Air was almost impossible now, and the tears were unstoppable, exploding out of him as pain overtook his lanky, fourteen-year-old body.

"This'll teach you to try and tell your mother about me! Try again, and you're not the only one who's going to feel the consequences of your stupidity!" he looked menacingly into Katie's bedroom, where the little girl slept soundly, oblivious to the abuse that was going on just feet from her door.

Rage burned like fire through Kendall's veins. There was no way that this monster was laying a finger on his baby sister.

"I wouldn't let you."

His father laughed wildly, foul breath and spit flying at Kendall's face. He reached down, and dragged Kendall closer to him by the collar of his shirt.

"Willing to take all the punishment, are you?" he grinned, and it sent shivers down Kendall's spine.

Though he was terrified, Kendall would never show it. "Yes."

Another laugh. "Good, this is good…" he whispered, "What do you say we start now?"

Kendall squeezed his eyes shut, as his ribs and abdomen nearly exploded with mind-blowing pain. Tears ran down his face, and white crept into his vision, and all he could hear was hideous, terrifying laughter ringing in his ears.


Kendall woke up with a scream, his pulse pounding wildly, his entire body radiating pain. Fear filled his tired, confused mind. What was going on? What was happening? His eyes darted around the room. He was in danger. Katie. Oh god, where was Katie? He glanced around the pitch-black room again, his eyes fixating on the figure that slept in the bed a few feet away from his. James. Somehow, the name floated into his head. James could help. If only he could reach him, but his ribs hurt too badly, and his head was spinning. He called James' name, but received no response. Desperately, he tried to raise himself off of the bed, but, before he could steady himself, his legs gave out and he crumpled to the floor. Tears began to stream down his face, uncontrollable sounds of pain escaped his lips, and his already labored breathing became rapid and shallow. Beginning to give in to the agony and fear, he whimpered James' name over and over, hoping for him to wake up—to come and rescue him.


"James." It was just a whisper. In fact, James wasn't sure if he'd heard it at all.

"James." The voice was louder, more frightened, weaker, and more desperate. No, it definitely was not his imagination.

"James!" It was a cry this time, of pain, and James' eyes flew open, glancing frantically around the darkened bedroom, his heartbeat quickening.

"James..." the voice teetered off, the volume decreasing, as a pounding thump resounded like a shot through the dark, giving way to nearly silent sobbing.

James sat up in bed, swinging his legs quickly over the side, and standing up. Something was definitely wrong. He took a large stride forward, his foot catching on something sprawled on the ground, almost toppling him to the floor. A small cry met his ears, and the calling had returned, a little louder this time.

"JamesJamesJamesJames..." the voice whimpered, chanting his name like a mantra, a lifeline, the only thing keeping them from dropping off the edge.

Blearily, James found his way to the light switch on the wall, flipping it roughly. Whipping around, he looked to see what was on the floor-or rather, who.

Kendall was crumpled up on the carpet, tears streaming from his red-rimmed eyes down his pale cheeks. His knees were pulled close to his body, his trembling arms wrapped around his heaving torso. A childlike whimpering, keening sound was emitting from his lips, and his body rocked slightly back and forth. His mouth moved soundlessly, still silently forming James' name. His green eyes were shining with tears, glazed with a heart-wrenching mix of horror and agony. He was trembling violently, his breathing becoming frantic and labored, as his eyes grew even wider at the realization that his chest seemed to be closing up.

"J-ames...", he whispered, unable to keep the stutter out of his voice as he laid terrified eyes on his friend, "-Can't-t b-breathe-" it was all he managed to say before his already shallow breaths turned to heaving gasps, accompanied by hysterical sobbing.

James stood shocked for a moment, before springing into intense action.

Swooping down to the ground swiftly, he wrapped his arms around Kendall's cold, whimpering body. Pulling Kendall's back to his chest, he let his best friend's lolling head slump weakly against his shirt, each minute his movement slowing, yet his frantic breath was almost keeping pace with James' racing heart.

"Shh, Kendall, it's okay, I'm here. I'm right here, I promise, I'm not going anywhere. P-please try to breathe, buddy, please." James begged, as his pounding heart threatened to rip through his chest.

The sound of James' voice seemed to distract Kendall for a split second; his pleading eyes locking on James' worried ones, as he tried with all of his might to breathe, to calm down. But he couldn't. It was too much. It hurt. He couldn't. He couldn't do it. James. James. James would help.

He threw his shaking arms around James' lean waist, gripping as hard as he could as his abating strength weakened even further, and buried his face against his shirt, trying to breathe in the scent of James, rather than the air that had all but disappeared from the room.

James hoisted Kendall's body so that the entire upper half of his torso was leaning against his firm chest. He wrapped one arm around Kendall's shoulders and interlocked those fingers with Kendall's. He used the other hand to gently stroke Kendall's back, and sweaty forehead, carefully rocking back and forth, in a steady but subtle pattern. A thought came to his mind, and he began to hum the tune of "Halfway There".

At first, it didn't seem to do anything, but James continued, bringing his lips closer to Kendall's ear, desperate to get through to him, and hummed a little louder.

"H-hurts, James." Kendall cried quietly, his voice somewhat muffled by James' shirt, taking deep, but still strained, breaths.

"I know, buddy. Shh, it's all right, I promise that you're safe now. I swear on my life." James reassured him, rubbing between Kendall's shoulder blades firmly but carefully, which, for some reason, seemed to calm him down.

"P-please..." Kendall choked out, going rigid as another wave of tears flooded from his eyes, and he began shaking.

"Please what?" James replied, alarmed at Kendall's almost hysterical mood change.

Suddenly, Kendall froze, his entire body going stiff. His breathing came out as terrified, shallow panting. He raised his head off of James' completely soaked shirt, his eyes looking up at him, filled with an inhuman fear.

"D-don't h-hurt her, I p-promise, I w-won't say anything," Kendall cried into the air, his breathing becoming dangerous again as he struggled to maintain control. He hung his head, covering his face with his trembling hands.

"Buddy, it's me-it's James. Look at me, Kendall." James commanded gently.

Kendall's head snapped up as though his life depended on it, his wide green-gold eyes glassy.

James gripped the sides of Kendall's head tenderly, running his hands in a rhythmic, soothing pattern through his sweaty hair, ignoring the flinch that ran through Kendall's body at his touch. He tilted Kendall's chin up, forcing the blonde to look at him.

"Kendall, listen to me, okay? You're safe. You're at home with me, and the guys, and everyone that loves you. No one will ever lay a finger on you again. Understand? I'm here, Kendall. I'll protect you."

Kendall just stared at him, his eyes boring into James', trying to comprehend what he was being told. Home. Safe. James. The guys. Love. Suddenly, another wave of panic flooded through him.

"K-katie?" he managed to stutter.

James nodded. "She's here, too, Kendall. So is your mom. We're all okay." James spoke softly, still keeping his gaze firmly locked on Kendall's, trying to speak to him not only with words, but with eye contact.

Kendall blinked and sighed, his body loosening a little, and let his head fall to rest on James' arm.

"James?" he mumbled.

"Yes, buddy?"

"C-can you sing for me?" he pleaded, hugging James closer to him.

"Of course, Kenny. What song?" James replied automatically, ready and willing to do anything to make Kendall feel better.

Kendall whimpered, but didn't answer, and James could tell he was starting to work himself up again.

"Alright, its okay, Kendall, I promise." James rubbed his arm comfortingly and began to sing.

"I remember tears streaming down your face

When I said, "I'll never let you go"

When all those shadows almost killed your light

I remember you said, "Don't leave me here alone"

But all that's dead and gone and passed tonight

Just close your eyes

The sun is going down

You'll be all right

No one can hurt you now

Come morning light

You and I'll be safe and sound

Don't you dare look out your window darlin'

Everything's on fire

The war outside our door keeps raging on

Hold on to this lullaby

Even when the music's gone

Gone

Just close your eyes

The sun is going down

You'll be all right

No one can hurt you now

Come morning light

You and I'll be safe and sound

Just close your eyes

You'll be all right

Come morning light,

You and I'll be safe and sound..."

James trailed off, looking down at Kendall curled up in his arms, finally asleep, with the ghost of a small smile on his pale face. Relief slammed into James like a tsunami, his heart beating faster. Gently, his lifted Kendall in his strong arms, and carried him to bed. After laying Kendall in the warm covers, he paused a moment, before climbing in next to him. He pulled him close to his body, smiling gently when Kendall snuggled into his touch. He would stay there all night, if it meant reassuring Kendall that he was safe. Resting his head next to Kendall's and closing his eyes, he knew that through thick and thin, through the good times and the bad, as long as he was breathing, he would protect his best friend.

No matter what.


A/N: Did you guys like it? It's a new kind of subject/scenario for me, but I had a great time writing it! I just love protective James comforting Kendall! ^_^ Please review!

See you guys REALLY soon,

Much Love,

-Candie :)