Chapter 10—Look to your elder
Disclaimer: I do not own the Avengers. They belong to Marvel/Disney
A Saturday morning and Coulson's doctor cleared him for a short outing, which, at the moment, consisted of Darcy and Rogers taking turns pushing his wheelchair for laps around his floor, and a stop in the cafeteria for breakfast. Darcy kept talking about taking him out of the building, but Rogers was trying to reason with her about all the reasons it was a bad idea. Coulson thought it was a good idea, but he wouldn't say it out loud. He wanted out of the hospital, but he wasn't ready yet. Besides, he was enjoying the banter between his sister and Rogers. Listening to someone try and reason with Darcy was amusing, and Rogers was keeping up with her, though he was exasperated.
"No. End of discussion. We are not taking your brother out of the building. Fury will kill me," Rogers said.
"I thought you didn't care what Fury thinks," Darcy countered.
"Like it or not, he's your boss," Rogers said. "I thought you liked your job."
"Tony offered me a better deal if I ever wanted to come work for Stark Industries," Darcy said.
"What kind of better deal?" Coulson asked, finally breaking his silence.
"The kind of salary you'd want to sell your soul for," Darcy said. "With perks. And I'd get to be a minion. I kind of like that idea."
"You're my minion," Coulson said. "No one else's. Are we clear?"
"You have exclusive rights," Darcy said. "I choose to be your minion. For free. Out of love and sibling obligation. That comes first, but just so you know, I have the option of being a paid minion. For Avengers. That counts for something."
"We, as Avengers, do not need minions," Rogers said.
"No, you have groupies," Darcy said.
"Again, we don't need those either," Rogers said.
"Well, Phil's a Captain America groupie, and I'd be a Hulk groupie any day," Darcy muttered.
"What?" Coulson snapped.
"Nothing," Darcy said, patting her brother on the head. "We should get you back to your room so you can take a nap, because you're getting snippy."
"I am not," Coulson said.
"Sure, Phil," Darcy said.
"I don't need a nap," Coulson said. "I just recently woke up from a coma, and I don't want to sleep more than I have to. I think Steve would back me up on this one. Right?"
"You do need to rest, so you can heal up," Rogers said.
"Rest isn't the same as sleeping 20 hours a day," Coulson said. "I can rest, and be awake at the same time."
"The doctor said you're getting overstimulated," Darcy said. "Which means you aren't sleeping. I saw those files you were trying to hide this morning. Who snuck them to you—Jasper or Maria Hill?"
"Maria," Coulson said. "But I asked for them. It's something I can work on while I'm convalescing, nothing too exciting."
"Sure," Darcy said, wheeling her brother toward his room, where she helped him back into bed. "Files. Now."
"No," Coulson said. "You don't have the security clearance to even touch those files."
"Hand them over, or I'll tell Tony you're not following doctor's orders," Rogers said.
"Like that's a reasonable threat," Coulson said.
"He'll be over here badgering you until you agree to be a nice, compliant patient," Rogers said. "It might be nice. I could use a little time off from babysitting detail, and I'm sure Tony would be glad to take some of my shifts."
"You wouldn't," Coulson said.
"Try me," Rogers said.
Coulson glared, but reached under the mattress, handing over the short stack of files.
"Thank you," Rogers said. "I'll make sure these get back to Hill. You don't have to worry about that. Now why don't you try and take a nap, and we can talk when you wake up?"
"Yeah, Phil," Darcy said. "Be a good boy, or I'll make you regret it."
"How?" Phil asked.
"I'll come up with something," Darcy said. "Maybe Tony would love to throw a party at your apartment? Hey, Steve, doesn't that sound like a great idea? Phil doesn't follow orders, we'll have the party of the century. Imagine total random strangers in your place, going through your stuff. . ."
Coulson glared at his sister, and he knew she wasn't bluffing. She'd do it, and he'd live to regret not doing as he was told.
"Fine," he said.
Darcy leaned over, kissing him on the cheek. "That wasn't so hard, was it? Steve is going to stick around. I have a few errands to run, and I'll be back this afternoon. See you then."