Title: Under the Table
Author: Forsaken2003
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own none; all belong to Joss Whedon
Comments: Always welcomed!
Summary: It's boys' night out and things go differently from every other boys' night out.

Warnings/Spoilers: Post NFA
Beta'd by: Whichclothes

Prompt #309 from Tamingthemuse- Under the Table

Prompt from kinda_gay: #14- hard

Note: From now on most of my Tamingthemuse stories will be named as the challenge.

It was the third Saturday of the month. That meant boys' night out. Spike met Xander at the local pub, ready to get pissed and spend his hard earned money from the Council. Getting paid to kill demons. He had the best job in the bloody world.

"What are we starting with tonight, whelp?" Spike asked. "Darts or pool?"

"Well I plan on getting shitfaced, so maybe darts before I end up throwing them at someone because I can't see," Xander suggested.

Spike raised an eyebrow but shrugged. It didn't matter to him either way. "You start then."

The game went quickly. Spike won. He always did. Xander didn't know why he continued to play when he had two disadvantages. One, Spike was a vampire and two, Xander had only one eye.

They moved on to pool where they drank more. Spike watched as Xander slammed beer after beer after beer back. By one in the morning Xander was under the table… metaphorically of course.

Xander lined up his pool cue with a ball. He was able to hit the ball but sent it flying across the room. He snickered. "Hole in one!"

"Yeah, pet. Hole in one." Spike took the pool cue away from him. "I think we'd best leave. They want to close up now."

Xander pouted. "But that means we have to go home."

"That's what that usually means. Besides, aren't you helping Buffy with training in the morning?" Spike asked.

"Pssh! Helping? I put on a big giant padded suit… which makes me look FAT! And then all the girls get to hit me. Fun times for the Xan-man!"

Spike wrinkled up his nose. That really didn't sound like fun. "Maybe someone else can help the slayer then."

"Yeah, right. Like who? Andrew? He is a sniveling piece of shit. You should eat him!" Xander said. A smile spread over his mouth at the thought.

"I don't think the others would like that too much," Spike said. Of course the thought had crossed his mind more than it should.

Xander stomped his foot and stumbled into Spike. "But he's taking my place."

Spike wrapped his arms around Xander and helped him get his footing. "What do you mean?"

"He's the gopher now!" Xander stated. "He came in to our circle after he killed his best friend. KILLED. And they all accept him. They sent him to LA to collect the slayer. They didn't think to ask me."

"Well, you were in Africa at the time," Spike reminded him.

Xander snorted. "Yeah, because I wouldn't have minded sleeping in a hotel for a night instead of a hut. I wouldn't have minded seeing Cordelia one more time."

"Pet, he isn't replacing you," Spike said softly. "Yes, he brings something to the team but he isn't you."

"You have pretty eyes," Xander said changing the subject. Spike just blinked at him. "And you have the cutest nose." He tweaked Spike's nose. "BEEP!"

Spike scowled and batted Xander's hand away. "Stop that," he growled.

"You're sexy when you're all growly," Xander said with a large smile. "It makes me all tingly… down there," he whispered the last part.

"What?" Spike was confused. Xander had never acted like this when he was drunk. "Pet, I think it's time for bed."

Xander became excited. "You're place or mine?"

Spike's eyes bulged. "I didn't mean to have sex, Xan."

"Oh…" Xander deflated. "It's because of the whole no eye thing, isn't it? I don't have to take the patch off."

Spike was becoming more confused by the minute. "What? No. Bloody hell. Jesus, you are drunker than I thought."

"Nuh uh… well okay uh huh. But that's good!" Xander said and then he took Spike's hand and nipped playfully at his fingers.

"Why exactly is that a good thing?" Spike asked. His pants started to feel a little tight.

"Because that means I have the courage to do this." Xander lunged at Spike and his lips smacked against Spike's hard.

Spike had absolutely no idea what was going on except that there was a pair of very warm lips against his and they felt good. He pulled Xander closer and took over the kiss, nipping and licking Xander's lips.

"Can we go back to your place now?" Xander asked out of breath.

"No," Spike said equally out of breath for someone who didn't need to breathe. Xander went to open his mouth to protest but Spike continued. "If you want me you have to be bloody sober."

Xander leaned against Spike. "Can't you just reject me now instead of waiting until I'm sober?"

"I don't remember saying that I would reject you," Spike said, kissing Xander's forehead. "Now let's get you home so you can sleep this off."

Xander sighed. "Yeah, okay. I'm not feeling very good anyway. Will you still stay?"

Oh good vomit duty, Spike thought to himself. "Yeah, I'll stay."

Xander groaned and buried his head under his pillow. Didn't he learn from his father that drinking that much was never a good idea? Apparently not. The Harris gene struck again.

"You look like hell," Spike commented. He'd heard Xander's heart rate speed up so he decided to get him some water and aspirin. "Here."

"Ah, my hero." Xander managed to sit up which was all in all a miracle. He accepted the items and greedily drank the water.

Spike stood there waiting for Xander to set the glass down. After he did Spike asked about last night. "Do you remember anything from last night?"

"Ugh…" Xander flopped back down. "Yeah, you whooped my ass at darts and pool. Next time I'm giving you a head start at drinking. Maybe it'll give me an advantage."

"That's it?" Spike asked, trying to not show disappointment. This was exactly why Spike didn't let anything go farther than a kiss. Xander didn't say anything so Spike nodded and decided it was best to leave. Luckily Xander's apartment had a basement exit.

"I remember," Xander said, stopping Spike.

Spike turned around with a raised eyebrow. "What exactly do you remember?"

Even though Spike couldn't see Xander blushing he could hear the blood rushing to the surface. "I kissed you and wanted to take you home. Which I guess I did, huh?"

"Yeah, you did," Spike confirmed.

"I also remember none of the fun stuff happened," Xander said sounding disappointed. He slowly sat up. "Are we going to do any of the fun stuff?"

That was the question wasn't it? On one hand sleeping with a friend never worked out. But on the other hand sex with Xander could be one hell of a ride. "Yeah, I think we're gonna do the fun stuff, pet." He pulled his shirt off.

"Great!" Xander said. He then turned green and vomited over the side of the bed.

"Bollocks."

The End