"If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered."
―Edgar Allan Poe
Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes and tried to block out everything. His heart suddenly started pumping harder in his chest, and his palms became clammy. These signs were recognisable; he had been stuck with them for over half a year. His breathing became rasp and he almost grasped at his throat, almost. Instead, he focused on something normal like a cute image of a bunny and began counting in his head. Slowly, his heart returned to its normal pace, and the feeling of dread slowly slipped away. Opening his eyes, he looked around. His bedroom walls were still in the dark, the lights from outside still playing with the shadows on them. At least, he no longer believed it was someone out to hunt him and kill him. He had to remember he was safe, in his big and highly secure house. The thing was, he was neither safe nor free. His mind still played memories he had long tried to suppress. It was of no use.
He stood up, his legs slightly shaking from the panic attack he had just avoided. He silently walked over to his desk, like a person who did not wish to make noise. His physical scars had healed with time, his hair had grown back, he had a few scars and bruises down his back but at least, his bones had healed. What had not healed was what was inside his head. The screams, the blood, the fear, everything was still there, still lurking in his mind, like a cat playing with his prey. He had to put an end to this. Closing his eyes for the last time, he was ready, ready to lose to the world.
[…] If somebody finds this video, this diary entry, please take it as a warning. This is not a joke. I'm not a coward. I'm not somebody who falls for the stupid tricks death can offer. I've seen what I had to see in this life and I can't bear it anymore. I have the mental and the physical scars to prove it. I can't stay here… This world is too horrible now that I've seen the truth. [Pause] I'm scared; scared of all the choices I've made, all the horrible things I've done. I hope God can forgive me for what I've done; I had no choice but to do it. My classmates and I were thrown into this horrible game. So horrible… [Sobs] Just speaking of it makes my heart race, my hands shake. I feel like dying, just to erase those memories. I will die; finally admit I lost to this sick game. But first, I have to warn the world about this sick game.
[Deep breath] It's called Battle Royale. Nobody knows of it. They told us only the high-end of the government knows of it and that all the rest are ignorant. I read the book that talked about it; I never thought it was real. They had to let the author release it since he was the winner of the 1999 Battle Royale game. They managed to let the book pass as an innocent story, the imagination of the author. [Pause] My classmates and I were thrown into this game with one rule: kill one another until one survives, the one with the strongest will to live. I'm the only one who managed to survive, the only one who got out of this perverted game. I never had the strongest will and I still don't know how I won. Was it the fear of dying? At least I can say I'm not scared of dying anymore. I already lost my mind. The worst is, at the end of the game, the prize is not even worth it. After all you've done in this sick game, the only thing you want to do is crawl in a hole and die. The loss of humanity, the loss of your friends and dear ones it's so bad, so awful. This is all too much [rasp breathing] I can't take this anymore. They have me under surveillance. They don't want me to record this but I'll hide it. The world needs to know the truth. [whispers] This game exists. Beware of it. Any class can get chosen as long as it is a secondary 3-5 class. The horrors you will go through are unmanageable. We were lucky, I guess. That is if you can call this a sick perverted luck. They change the rules at every game; the setting, the weapons, the hours to kill, they change absolutely everything. It changes each year. They called that an experiment. What kind of sick people do experience on other humans? Anyways, we managed to have the option of a "normal game," if this can be called a normal game. We were lucky. We had the same game as the one stated in the book. But beware! They could choose to add new rules, and remove other rules, I won't know.
[long pause] I'm scared. It's the only thing I can do. I need people to discover how sick humans really are. If you ever end up in this game, do not trust anybody. Whatever rules they put in there, do not trust anybody. In the end, you almost can't trust yourself. [short pause] I … I think, I'm ready to go. Good bye, world. [click]
[Video excerpt recovered by Agent Ren Sakamochi from the 2009 Battle Royale terminated winner]