A/N :: She's alive! Can you believe it? I am extremely sorry for the long wait. Instead of writing lemons, I should have been writing this, right? Right. But, school starts in a little more than a week for me, and my dad's in the army, and we're living in Italy right now, so shopping for school is a bit difficult, ya know? But, I got it didn't I? And I'm happy I did so, 'cause I'm quite happy with this chapter! I might even love it.
But, I had to do a bit of research for this chapter.. so, that kinda put me off..
Thank's for the reviews guys, they mean a lot to me. And so do the alerts, and fav's. I never thought people would like my story this much! We're like, 10 reviews away from 50! I'm ecstatic!
Disclaimer :: I don't own shit.. yet.
Chouji glanced at the couple sitting in a more secluded part of the resturaunt. Itachi Uchiha, and Deidara Iwa. They were a cute couple really. The blond looked happy, his blue eyes twinkling in the dim lighting. While Itachi on the other hand.. looked like he would rather be anywhere else than here. Chouji couldn't help but feel slightly bad for the blond, especially since he was being forced - yes, forced - to sabotage this date. By two different parties; His girlfriend, and Sasuke Uchiha.
Chouji was the type of guy to do anything for the good of another person. He was sweet, loving, and would give his life for his best friends.
Sasuke Uchiha is not his best friend. Hell, he isn't even his friend.
If anything, the Uchiha was a former love rival. He went through hell and back, and back to hell again just to get Ino to realize that he loved her. Then, he went through that process again, just to get her to realize she felt the same. She was the only reason that he was going through with this. Otherwise, he would've kicked the four hiding in the storage room in the back outside on their asses. But he couldn't, cause Ino would have his ass for doing so.
So that was why Chouji was stuck listening to Sasuke, and doing what he commanded. And Chouji hated, but.. he didn't have a choice. Hence why he was being forced.
Chouji took a deep breath before heading over to the blond, and the Uchiha, giving them his brightest smile.
"Hello, I'm Chouji, I'll be your waiter for this wonderful evening." He started, handing them each a menu, "What drinks would you like?"
Deidara glanced at the menu before looking back at Chouji, "Could I get a Sprite, un?"
Chouji nodded before looking at the Uchiha.
"A water would be fine."
Chouji nodded again, "I'll be right back with your drinks, sirs'."
With that, he spun on his foot and hurried to the storage room, getting Itachi and Deidara's drinks on the way.
"Okay guys, hurry up," He said to the four in the room, "I don't have all day."
Sasuke rolled his eyes with a nod, grabbing Deidara's drink and the backpack he had on the floor. His pale hand reached into the bag, pulling out a bottle with clear liquid inside. When Chouji got a look at the name of the bottle, his eyes widened in fear.
"Is.. Is that Everclear?" He asked.
Everyone in the room nodded, watching as Sasuke opened the bottle of alcohol.
What was different about Evercleear? Well, Everclear is almost pure alcohol. It's a colorless, odorless, and tasteless liquor sold at two high strengths, 75.5 % and 95%, it's the most alcoholic beverage out there. In fact, Everclear that is sold with 95 % of ethenol, is illegal in 15 states. And in some, you have to have a permit just to buy it.
So, all Chouji could wonder was where, and how the hell did they get Everclear?
"H-how much alcohol is in that, guys?" Chouji asked, fearing the answer.
Sasuke looked up in thought. "The highest out there.." He mumbled.
Chouji gaped, "Guys! That's illegal! How did you get it!?"
All four of the males in the room gave him an incredelous look.
"Do you know who our familes are?" They all asked.
Sasuke shook his head, "We don't want him to.. die or anything, we just want him tipsy, not falling over himself, but.. so he's calm when all the other shit goes down, you know? So how much should we put in?"
"About.. one shot," Naruto mused, "Three's enough to get the regular person drunk. But if he has a high tolerance towards alcohol, it probably won't be enough."
Sasuke nodded, pouring out some of the sprite and putting about the equivalent of one shot in the glass, then mixing it up with the straw. After that, he shoved the glass in Chouji's hand.
"Now go and take this to them, okay?"
Chouji nodded begrudgingly, and walked out of the room. He was compelled to switch the glass of sprite with another, so Deidara didn't get embarrassed. But alas, his girlfriend would gut him and hand him dry.
When he got towards the two, he placed the drinks on the table,
"Are you guys ready to order?" He asked, a big, fake smile on his face.
After taking the two orders, Chouji gave the note to chefs in the back, telling them to hurry up with the food. One mention of the Uchiha who ordered, had them going.
The food was finished as quickly as the men and women could make it without making the food bad. In fact, it was better than usual. On that note, Chouji took the food to the storage room, setting it down on the table set up in there.
Naruto looked to Gaara, "Do it, dude."
Gaara got up, bringing his bag with him, then pulled Deidara's plate closer. Then, he snapped on a pair of gloves, reaching for his bag.
"What are you gonna do?" Chouji warily asked the Sabuku.
The redhead ignored him, in favor taking his hand out the bag, in them were two objects. A knife, and a pepper. Chouji's eyes studied the pepper, almost immediatley realizing which pepper it was.
"Naga Bhut Jolokia.. The Ghost Pepper.." He murmered in atonishment, his eyes widening for the second time that day, "How.. how did you get that?" Chouji asked quietly. "It's the second hottest pepper in the world, it comes from half way across the world. How?"
Gaara glanced at him, "You don't want to know.." He answered, before slicing and dicing the pepper into small pieces, scooping them up, and spreading the pieces across Deidara's food. If he was tipsy enough, he wouldn't notice them. Hopefully.
"Get the glasses ready." Gaara commanded, and the other three nodded, filling a few glasses of water and spiking the drinks with a bit of Everclear.
"Can I ask you one thing, Sasuke?" Chouji asked the Uchiha.
Sasuke looked at him with an uninterested look. "Shoot."
"Why are you doing this to your brother if you love him so much? Why are you manipulating one of the only things that could make your brother happy? Why are you messing up his love life?"
The room fell into an awkward silence as Sasuke and Chouji stared at each other.
"Because," Sasuke spoke, "Deidara isn't the one for Itachi. Itachi doesn't like Deidara, and the blond can't possibly make him happy, they're too different. Deidara want's different things in life, and is clearly in the relationship for the last name. Why the hell do you care?"
"Why don't you let Itachi figure this out himself?" He asked, "If this were Shika, I'd let it be an expeirence he could learn from, not something I made a game. Shika's like a brother to me, just like Itachi is for you."
Sasuke's dark eyes shifted towards the ground. "It's totally different.."
"Hey, the food's getting cold!" Naruto exclaimed, "You better get it to them before they get.. uhm, suspicious! Yeah.."
Chouji nodded, shooting Sasuke a pointed look, before scooping up the plates, and taking them out to the blond and Itachi. Chouji could only hope he put some sense into the Uchiha before this got too out of hand.
"Here's your food, sirs'." Chouji said brightly, setting the plates down in front of the two, "I hope you enjoy."
With that, he turned, and left briskly, to observe what happended from the back.
Deidara looked at his drink cautiously, there was something weird about it. It was making him feel dizzy, and he didn't like it. But he simply shrugged it off, it was probably nothing .
He picked up his fork, stabbing up some food. When he tasted his food he almost melted, it was sooo delicious... Then, he almost melted.. again. Like, literally melted.
Itachi looked up at Deidara, who was going red in the face at a rate that couldn't be healthy. He put his fork down and rose a brow at his 'date.'
"Are you okay?" He asked.
Deidara's tan hand grabbed for his drink and downed it, "Oh.. is this s-supposed to be this.. spicy, un?" He asked, quickly.
Itachi shrugged. "I wouldn't know, I don't.. make the food."
Deidara rolled his blue eyes, fanning himself. "I need something to drink, un. It's too spicy.. Please.."
Itachi sighed as he stood, "I'll be back." He murmured, walking to where their nice little waiter had gone.
As he approached, said waiter was pushed out of a room that he must've been in. There were the sounds of a few bumps and thumps before it got quiet, the Uchiha and Waiter looking at each other.
"My date needs something more to drink. Seems as if the food was too spicy for him to handle." Itachi spoke, "May you bring something to drink for him?"
Chouji nodded, "Yes sir, I'll be right on it."
Itachi nodded, "Good."
"That was a close one," Naruto breathed, looking at the other with an amused gleam in his eyes.
Chouji came in the room, gathering the drinks on a platter, "Are you sure about this, Sasuke?" He asked.
The youngest Uchiha nodded. "Do it."
The Akimichi sighed, walking back out of the room and delivering it to Deidara and Itachi. The blond's face was still red and it looked as if it was getting redder with each passing second, his lips being the reddest thing on his face, looked as if they were on fire. Probably were.
Deidara's blue eyes gazed steadily at him, "Is the food u-usually this.. spicy?" He asked breathlessly, drinking another of the spiked drinks.
"Well," Chouji started, "The dish is usually made with some hot pepper, unless you specify whether or not you want them.. they put them in the food. I apologize for the incovience." When the two at the tabled nodded, Chouji mentally sighed with relief. He'd winged it.
With that, Deidara calmed down, and with each drink, he got slightly more and more tispy. The blond had a high tolerance for alcohol it seemed. Most people would be blackout drunk. Though maybe, since the Everclear was mixed with soda, and being drunk while eating food, it wasn't as effective as it could be.
Nonetheless, he was still getting drunk, and that wasn't even the grand finale.
Chouji watched in confusion as Sasuke and Neji stood up, grabbing their respective bags, and walking towards the back door.
"What.." Chouji called, "Where are you guys going?"
"We have to go and set up at my house," Sasuke answered, "Naruto and Gaara have been informed about the rest of the plan. They'll tell you what to do."
Neji smiled politley at Chouji, "And thank you for all the help, today. It was very nice of you."
With that, the two walked out of the room. Chouji scratched his cheeks, he could see why Shikamaru liked the Hyuuga, but he couldn't understand why the Hyuuga would hang out with someone like Sasuke.
He shrugged, turning to the other two, "So, what's the plan?" He asked, warily, eyeing the two.
"Well.." Naruto drawled, "Sasuke said that Itachi has a sweet tooth, and that Deidara likes sweets too, so they'll probably order something like cake.. icecream, something that can easily be dropped.."
"So," Gaara continued, "All you need to do is drop whatever they get on Deidara."
Chouji nodded, hopefully the two wouldn't get anything too drastic.
Oh damn, they got drastic. They got reaaally drastic. How does such a.. a.. elegant person have such a sweet tooth? It's crazy.
What drastic desert did the two get? Well, it was the best desert they had, a special of some sorts. It was called a.. a.. a Chocolate Molten Lava Cake. What was so special about this cake? Well.. you see, the outside of the cake is a delicious rich, chocolate, the finest in the state of course, topped with freshly made vanilla icecream, that is topped with a special, but delious hot fudge. The inside - oh the inside - was filled with hot fudge that seeped through the core of the core of the chocolate, giving it a fudgy, chocolately center. It was delicious.
And it was to be dropped on the poor blond. Chouji already felt horrid for doing this to the blond, but he had no choice. Ino would have his balls if he disobeyed.
He waited patiently as the cake was made to perfection for the Uchiha. When the bell rung, signaling the cake was finished, he got it, his eyes scanning the area for an efficient way to drop the cake on Deidara. Without looking suspicious of course.
There were no puddles, the floors weren't slippery, no one was walking towards in his direction.. Except..
If he timed this right, those kids who were obviously about to start running around would bump into him, sending the cake towards Deidara. Let's pray that this worked.
Three.. Two.. One
He walked out the back, heading towards the blond and raven, half of him hoping this plan would work, while half of him hoping it would fail. But as he saw the children running straight at him (children who looked a bit too familar for his tastes), he knew he had no other choice. Just as he was about to reach the table, the kids came barreling past him, knocking into one of his arms, and making him loose his balance. The cake flew out of his hands, and he landed on the floor with a 'thud.'
The room fell into a eery silence, except for the kids who were laughing and giggling.
Chouji took one glance up, and started to crawl away, Deidara's half-drunken one eyed, anger filled leer was enough to make him shake in his boots. He neared the storage room door, crawling in, hearing the soft, quiet, and dangerous foot step following behind. And when he opened the door, Naruto and Gaara were no where to be found. But oddly enough, Chouji could've sworn he heard Naruto loud, obnoxious laugh, and Gaara's dark, creepy chuckles.
Chouji looked behind him to see no one there, not the blond, not Itachi, not Naruto, and not Gaara.
He was officially going crazy.
Sasuke eyed the article of fine clothing Neji held in his hand.
"Hell - no." He growled, throwing the top to the floor.
Neji narrowed his eyes at him, "You will wear this, and you will wear this now, do you understand me? This isn't even revealing, if anything, this is the least revealing."
Sasuke crossed his arms stubbornly, looking away, "Whatever, I don't have to listen to you, Hyuuga."
Said Hyuuga smirked, "Then I don't have to help you, Uchiha."
Sasuke glared at him, picking up the top, and looking at it with disgust. The clothing it's self was.. very good looking, but that didn't mean that Sasuke wanted to wear it. "God, Neji, is this even from the males section."
Neji sat down on the end of Sasuke's bed, "Actually, no. It's from Victoria's Secret. It's the After Hour's Satin Pajama's. New actually," Neji mused, "I got a medium long, just to add to the effect of.. I guess.. cuteness. It should hang mid-thigh, maybe even higher, since your taller than me."
The Uchiha stared at his friend, an incredelous look on his face. "So.. you're telling me, that you went into Victoria's Secret, picked this out, tried it on, and bought it.. and none of the women looked at you like you were a fucking psycho? Cause that's obviously what you are."
Neji sighed, "They couldn't tell whether or not I was a girl or a guy.."
"Whatever.." Sasuke sighed, "As much as I don't want to wear it.. I guess.. it is cute.."
Neji smirked, "I know, I did pick it out," Then he stood ushering the Uchiha into the bathroom, "Get dressed, now."
The sight of Sasuke wearing his normal clothes, was always hot. But the sight of him in a jet black, sating pajama top, the top two buttons undone, hanging loosly off of one shoulder.. well, it was down right sexy. The pinkish blush on his pale cheeks made up for the nasty scowl he wore on his lips.
Neji gathered his stuff slowly, mentally doing a happy dance. Damn, he was good.
"Well, I guess I'll be leaving now," Neji drawled, "See ya."
Sasuke nodded to the other, "Bye. And.. thanks I guess."
Neji nodded back, "No problem."
With that, Sasuke sat back on his bed, thinking about exactly what he would do when Itachi got home.
A/N :: Does that qualify as a cliffhanger? I kinda think it does, don't you? I tried my best using everyone's ideas. So, I hope you guys liked it.. And do you guys know how hard it is to write Itachi on a date? It's fuckin' horrid! It got harder everytime I rewrote this, ya know!?
Oh, and all the lil' tid bits of info up there, are quite true, ya know? The pepper is a real pepper, and is indeed the second spicest in the world, Everclear is the most alcoholic drink, and that Victoria's secret stuff.. well, that's real too. ;) And the cake! That cake is actually from the menu at Applebees! OMG! My dad and I went there just for that! Yummm!
Leave a review!