Warnings: language, hints, nothing too serious...yet.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, I make no money of this writing.

Pairings:...

An: thank you for the reviews, I do appreciate them all :) enjoy the oddness...

...Bonding trip...

"Hidan...Hidan, wake up... you hear me? Get up already!"

His violet eyes opened barely, he mumbled a weak protest and tried to pull his blanket over his head, but no of course he wasn't allowed someone was holding the blanket denying it to him, growling he got his eyes properly open and let the smile tug his lips seeing Itachi hovering over him, it was good sight to see when you just woke up.

"Finally! I've been shaking you for the last five minutes, it's nothing new of course but damn Hidan you sleep like a log! How do you feel?"

Sitting up in the bed he yawned, Itachi looked like he just woke up, he could see the long black hair were still damp after the morning shower and to his enjoyment Itachi was sporting a black bathrobe instead of clothes another morning advantage was that Itachi still hadn't made the typical Itachi-pony tail, the black hair looked gorgeous when loose.

"I went out like a fucking light last night, seriously I remember you shutting the door and then nothing...and I hate to admit but I feel great." he grumbled resting his back against the headboard.

"I told you it would work!" Itachi cooed all too sweetly for him to resist the grin forcing its way on his face.

"Yeah you did."

"You should start getting ready, the others have already packed and dressed... Sasori tried to lock himself in his room and when Pein broke them down I think Sasori tried to pretend dead but Pein got him to move anyway by ridding Sasori of a chunk of his hair while spanking him... you wouldn't want an angry Pein encouraging you, would you?"

Suffice to say he was out of his bed and trailing for his bathroom with haste!

After a quick shower he returned in his room to hunt for some extra warm clothes discovering that Itachi was in the process of packing his stuff, no surprise there since he was not only a sucker when it came to cold but also when it came to packing.

"Thanks Itachi, what would I do without you?" he half teased going for his wardrobe with the white towel secured around his hips, he heard Itachi snort cutely and then there was a warm hand grabbing his muscled upper arm, he turned just to see that Itachi was holding clothes over one elbow.

"You should wear these, they're your warmest set of clothes...your bag is packed including everything you might need and would need, now I'm going to fix some breakfast if Deidara hasn't already, I'll see you downstairs. Don't forget to grab your cell and your snowboard."

Just like the previous year he got ready grumpily, pulling on the exceptionally thick jeans and army boots that were resting untouched in his wardrobe for the rest of the year, he made use of the terrible sweater only on Pein's trips as well, but whatever, so what that he looked like an overdressed dork? No big deal, he pocketed his cell grabbed his black and purple snowboard and the packed bag, he was sure it weighted like thousand pounds but he made it down the stairs in the end, carrying it for the rented little bus, of course Pein also known as the rich bastard wouldn't use the car...

Returning to the house he heard the others in the kitchen, Deidara as usual was chirping and sounding happy with life, he heard Pein's strict voice ask something to Itachi...bastard.

He went back upstairs to Itachi's room, grabbing Itachi's bag which seemed to weight even more than his, taking the kitty's crimson snowboard under his arm he got that to the bus, he was panting slightly and craved a cup of coffee.

As soon as his nose poked in the spacious kitchen Deidara squealed with a smile, Sasori was standing up by the table looking at Pein with red eyes looking close to killing Pein with a cereal bowl.

Itachi however was dressed already into dark blue jeans which looked rather thick too, black boots and an oversized white sweater, he didn't know how but Itachi still managed to look sexy...it was a mystery.

The same Itachi gave him a tiny smile when he was about to sit down by the table there was his mug waiting for him already with the brown liquid steaming.

"Hidan, un could you carry my bag to the van too or is it just Itachi deserving special treatment from you, un?"

He grimaced he wasn't about to get up now and go back outside in the cold, no fucking thank you!

"Yeah...only Itachi, don't remember you being worried last night as I slowly died because of your sweets!" he growled out smirking when Itachi chuckled putting a plate under his nose consisting of fried eggs and perfectly made toasts.

Deidara was about to yell, he knew it but he seemed to be lucky today, Pein stood up from the table looking all important and stuff.

"I'll take your bag Deidara and Sasori's too, I'm finished with breakfast anyway... I want you all to be in the van after thirty minutes max."

As soon as the orange haired man left Sasori snorted loudly mocking Pein's last words. "I hate him!" the crimson haired petite youth stated afterwards looking at the door where Pein was seen last.

Deidara giggled loudly sucking on a tea spoon covered with some of the nasty chocolate stuff kids put on their bread in the morning. "Un Sasori, then why you were blushing so madly when he spanked you?"

Hidan was sure they all saw the vein pop in Sasori's forehead.

"Because of pain you brat! I can't even sit down without feeling his oversized paw imprinted on my ass so shut the fuck up if you don't want the same treatment from me!" Sasori was a calm guy and Sasori didn't cuss...usually, that's why the blonde left it at that.

Hidan being the healthy youth he was attacked the eggs and toasts devouring them but nonetheless finding time to look at Itachi's butt since Itachi was still standing by the cooker, he liked when Itachi cooked, the kitty always gained a healthy flush and he could always imagine it was caused by something else than the heat, however as stated before it was pretty amazing how Itachi's little ass still managed to look tempting in those too baggy for Itachi jeans, tempting enough for him to feel the usual spark of lust in his loins.

When the black haired beauty turned he averted his eyes on his plate smirking only a little, Itachi sat down beside him grabbing a mug of sweet coffee. "There's more eggs if anyone wants." Itachi said and then took a toast starting to cover it with some sweet goo no doubt.

Deidara was casting worried looks at Sasori all through the breakfast and Sasori remained red in the face all through it, Hidan couldn't figure out the redness didn't disappear from pain or from embarrassment, it couldn't be the first, he didn't believe Pein would actually hurt the fragile looking being, he was sure Pein liked Sasori... meaning liked him romantically. Actually if Hidan was honest he thought Pein liked both Sasori and Deidara... come to think of it he was sure Pein was ogling Itachi too... the only thing he didn't understand was why Deidara didn't act jealous when Pein showed his likings for Sasori... he himself sure as hell was gritting his teeth in anger whenever the piercing covered man was even as much as smiling at Itachi the wrong way.

"Did you take my snowboard too Hidan?"

"Yeah Itachi don't worry I got it..." he answered ignoring Deidara's lecherous grin aimed at him so it wasn't even a secret he treated Itachi better than the rest...whatever. Itachi was treating him differently too. It was natural... it didn't prove anything and it sure as hell didn't make a sissy out of him.

When they were finished with breakfast or almost finished since Deidara was still rinsing the used dishes Sasori got all fidgety glancing at the clock, Hidan noticing that was giggling in his almost empty coffee mug, the crimson haired doll-face sure as hell was dreading another spanking because they were late.

But still after ten minutes they had gotten the house securely locked and they were all seated in the van, Pein sitting at the front and giving instructions to the hired chauffeur showing a map in the man's face.

Sasori was growling and beating Itachi with a pillow demanding the whole backseat because the red-head wanted to lay down due to his injuries.

In the end Itachi moved two seats to the front sitting beside him, pulling out a nail polish ready to redo the little cute fingernails, Hidan sort of liked the purple tone Itachi used. And he was sure only Itachi managed to wear the colour so...so...whatever it was Itachi, everything was perfect on Itachi.

Deidara of course was filling the little bus with the amazingly loud voice, yelling at Pein to stop bickering with the chauffer and then randomly changing the subject ranting about protective creams for the cold... no one was listening.

Hidan was occupied, he had to watch Itachi's steady fingers working the nail polish over the perfectly maintained nails.

The black neat eyebrows furrowed terribly when the van apparently hit a rock or a dent in the road, Itachi's pink tongue poked out looking at the purple mess on the little pinkie.

Itachi cleaned it with the other hand as best as seemed possible and then looked forward to where Pein was still studying the map even though they all knew the route, for gods sake.

"Pein, we'll need to stop for the shop to rent the skiing outfits you remember right?"

Pein looked back nodding importantly. "Of course Itachi, don't worry I remember I have it all planned out, we'll be there in three hours so you all should rest and don't make a mess of the van its rented after all, yes I mean you Deidara don't drop that sticky lollipop or you'll get punished like Sasori!"

Deidara squeaked and the next moment the blonde was flying across the van half falling unto Sasori whispering something in the petite teenager's ear.

Hidan just smirked sliding down in his seat, ready to snooze.

After twenty minutes he was shivering, he hated these trips, he really did!

"Pein you ass, it's fucking cold!"

"Stop being a pussy and suck it up Hidan, it's not cold!"

Hidan grumbled, he hated when Pein did this..."Fuck you! You're going to pay for my hospital bill!"

Pein kindly ignored him, he didn't care when he saw Itachi the kitty is moving, getting up and stretching the delicious body to reach the bag stored above the seats.

Hidan was watching his crush with a dumb expression. Itachi pulled out a black thin but comfy looking blanket coming over to him and smiling that tiny little smile.

"I knew you would be cold..." the black haired sin explained wrapping the black fabric around his shoulders.

At that moment he was pretty sure he loves Itachi...

"You're cold too Itachi..." he stated when he felt the icy fingers as Itachi fixed the blanked near his chin.

"It really is chilly here." Itachi whispered so Pein couldn't hear, unfortunately Deidara heard.

"Hidan, un sure that blanket is big enough for the two of you, un!" the blonde teased in the usual manner and Itachi blushed in the usual manner.

He turned his head just enough to see the blonde sitting in the curve of Sasori's body and playing with some sort of white plastic, smirking he winked at the blue eyed creature. "You right Dei..."

Itachi made the cutest sound as he opened his arms along with the blanket and pulled Itachi by the thin wrists till Itachi sat on his lap pretty much like last night, he locked his muscled arms around Itachi in that way securing the blanket around them both, for good measure he turned again poking his tongue at the blonde pretty much like a child.

Itachi wasn't resisting, but seeing Itachi's red cheeks he figured Itachi was kind of shocked into silence.

A surprised sound escaped Itachi's throat when he dared to fix the lean body on his lap putting his hands on Itachi's inner thighs parting the slender legs wider to get Itachi closer, it worked perfectly, it was easy to manoeuvre someone so light and petite but Itachi was gasping and the next thing he knew Itachi's red face was pushed in the crook of his neck, he knew all along that Itachi was shy. But the kitty didn't try to move away and that was enough for him, he settled down now ready to enjoy the ride...no pun intended. There wouldn't be that kind of ride...too bad.

"You're comfy?" he asked right into Itachi's ear, doing that on purpose, he liked to tease Itachi, he loved it you might say.

"Yes...I am, I'm not heavy?"

He snorted tightening his muscled arms around Itachi's back, minding the black ponytail. "Don't be silly."

After five minutes Itachi was dozing off and after another five he was doing the same despite the blonde's loud voice blabbing something to the snorting Sasori and despite Pein's ramblings to the chauffeur and even despite the fact that the horse...meaning the dog in the back was barking like the devil himself.

They were rudely awoken many times either by Deidara's screeching or a rough pump in the road but they fell asleep soon after that never truly getting out of the dozing zone. When he opened his eyes enough to spot mountains around them, that's when he fell asleep for real.

...

To his joy he was being wakened by Itachi, he liked Itachi doing it, the others were usually slapping him or pinching, Itachi preferred to use rather gentle touches and that lovely voice.

"Hidan...Hidan wake up, we're here... we need to go and rent our skiing stuff...hear me? Wake up!"

His lips quirked in a little smile but he shook his head refusing to open his eyes, the smile stretched wider when Itachi grabbed his shoulders shaking him slightly, the only thing his sleepy brain registered was the fact that he could feel Itachi's little ass on his thighs all too well despite the thickness of their jeans. Yes, he rather Itachi spend some more time wriggling like that on top of him... it was nice...besides he was warm and comfortable with the little kitten on his lap, give it some time and he would get hot no doubt.

"C'mon I can tell you're awake! Open your eyes, let's go before Pein comes to get us!"

Groaning and whining wouldn't help him so he opened his eyes loving to see Itachi as the first thing after awakening. He sighed when Itachi got off of him and fixed the jeans shivering, he guessed Itachi felt the coldness without his body heat just like he did.

They rented the suits with all the stuff coming to it, Pein got a completely black one stating that it was wise to chose anything but white, since white would be impossible to see from afar should anything happen.

Sasori took black one with red stripes and red ear warmers. Deidara no surprise there was choosing a baby blue with white stripes, oh well he guessed it did look nice on the energetic blonde. Itachi grabbed the only black one with deep purple stripes and purple boots and purple ear warmers.

Smiling Hidan picked the black and white one, not really caring much as long as it was warm.

With the equipment chosen and stored in the van they resumed their way for the mountain house having hot drinks in their gloved hands, Hidan grumbling to himself and slurping the hot coffee wondered was it even normal that he though Itachi with thick gloves and a slightly red nose from the cold looked simply adorably sexy...

It took another hour to get to the house but when they finally did Hidan jumped out of the van grabbing as much as he could carry and rushed for the heated indoors, forgetting that you supposed to unlock the door before entering and no, he didn't have the key.

Shivering and cursing under his breath he went back for the van grabbing another load of equipment and bags deciding that physical exercise will only warm him up... it took him six runs for the house and back to the van to carry everything and for Pein to pay the chauffer and thank the man, after that they all went for the house and carried everything inside Deidara and Itachi arguing who would make dinner since those two were the only ones able to manage it without burning down the house or poisoning someone or injure someone with a fork or something.

In the end Pein was making calls acting all important for what Hidan didn't know and honestly didn't care much, Deidara was helping Itachi having decided that they both would make the food. He was left in the living room with a grumpy Sasori who refused to take off the red ear warmers and the red thick scarf wrapped around the neck and half the head, Sasori despised cold pretty much like he did but Hidan thought there was something to do with the fact that Sasori was just so small while Hidan himself was strong built.

"Hidan... I'm sure if you would like... break my arm I would be free of this...be a friend eh?"

Hidan snickered catching a glimpse of Itachi in the kitchen, he turned to look at the little shivering bundle across from him.

"That sounds like a desperate plea...anyway I wouldn't be so sure Pein would let you off anyway... you might even deserve another spanking..." he teased grinning madly, if he was honest with himself then when he imagined Sasori over Pein's knee still sleepy and in boxers getting the little ass smacked...it was kind of arousing...

"Shut up! Don't mention it! It's not funny Hidan! I'm serious..."

When he couldn't stop giggling and choking because the picture of a squirming Sasori on Pein's lap just didn't leave him, a cushion hit him right in the face, that too wasn't enough to stop him from laughing.

Sasori didn't look amused in any way, in truth he stopped laughing when he realised that the crimson haired youth was looking hurt. He leaned forward lowering his voice to a whisper.

"C'mon Sasori you know he loves ya... you're not seriously offended... he didn't really hurt you that bad, did he?"

Sasori wasn't looking at him, the muddy brown eyes were cast on the knees, Sasori shook the head in denial and Hidan waited patiently knowing that Sasori usually took some time to collect his thoughts and to decide if the redhead even wanted to say them out aloud.

"No it didn't...hurt much...it's just that...he doesn't treat anyone else like that... if he thinks I'm some kind of bitch he's in for a rude awakening."

Hidan eyed the redhead carefully, people were so funny sometimes.

"Sasori...I'm pretty sure he has a thing for you... and you most probably became a victim to one of his kinks...seriously...open your eyes dude... the blonde and Pein are all over you."

Sasori blushed but the silence meant that the redhead wasn't as clueless as he put on, Hidan grinned of course Sasori had noticed, no doubt.

"Well in that case I'm even angrier at him..." Sasori growled and then looked right into his violet eyes leaning forward just like whispering. "Because you see you have a thing for Itachi but even as rude and crude you are you treat him with care and you always mind him and make sure he's okay and as far as I know you don't beat him up when he does something against you."

He wasn't about to deny it, that would be just stupid. He nodded instead and then shrugged. "It's not like everyone's the same... I mean c'mon Sasori look at the guy...he's probably some kind of dominatrix... but I'm sure you can get the sweetness out of him! Try to bat your eyelashes at him the next time he's all grumpy and self important, I'd like to see his reaction to your charms!"

Sasori did something unbelievable then... the redhead actually giggled and Hidan mildly wondered could anyone resist Sasori if the guy would use the natural looks and some wicked trick like puppy eyes or something.

"What you think I should do?" Sasori asked and Hidan without wasting time went to sit beside the petite redhead.

"Well first, take off those damn ear things they look cute but not entirely so..." he took the red warmers off and brushed Sasori's crimson hair fixing them so the lovely bangs fell above the big brown eyes, he unwrapped the red scarf while Sasori was looking at him from close up...looking at him intently.

"Hidan?"

"Mm?"

"Why have you never made a move on Itachi?"

Hidan fixing the red scarf grimaced. "Because I'm a bastard and I don't want to hurt Itachi which I would do sooner or later...so... yeah."

"What if you're hurting him by not making a move?"

"What makes you say that... has he said anything?"

"No Hidan, you know Itachi, he never talks about that kind of stuff... but I can see him looking at you and sometimes he looks at you with sad eyes, you know."

His scowl turned awfully sour and he didn't know what to say. Sasori took his hands away from the red hair he was still brushing mindlessly.

"Hidan you two already act like a couple if you haven't noticed, maybe you need to open your eyes too."

He opened his mouth rather shocked that...Sasori was right. He didn't get to say anything though.

"What's going on here... why you're holding Sasori's hands, is something wrong?" Pein had appeared seemingly out of nowhere glaring down at Hidan. He was about to stand up and shout some colourful profanities but the petite redhead let go of his hands and stood up...Hidan nearly cracked up seeing Sasori push back the lower lip in a cute pout, worry in the brown eyes.

He was shaking with silent laughter when Sasori lift one delicate hand cupping Pein's cheek. "Pein you're so angry lately, is there something bothering you? You're making me worry!" Sasori chirped out and by now Hidan was biting his knuckles, Pein's face went slack and dumb looking down into Sasori's big eyes. Even Hidan could see the almighty Pein lean into Sasori's touch and blush faintly.

"No...d-don't worry... I'm fine... I'm just a bit... sad that no one seems to like this trip... you tried to...avoid it too...so I got angry... I'm sorry...if I...offended you this morning Sasori."

Priceless!

Sasori smiled all too sweetly at the tall orange-head sliding the little nimble fingers into Pein's hair affectionately, Hidan had to admit Sasori was a natural charmer.

"Aw no Pein... I didn't want to avoid it... I was looking forward to spend some time with you here... I was just so sleepy this morning...but don't worry..." Sasori's smile stretched bigger and in that way it turned somewhat menacing. "...If you decide to ever spank me again without my consent or with people around to hear or see it... I am going to rip off your balls..." with that said the little hand stroked down Pein's chest sensually, Hidan observed Pein's mouth go slack and the greyish eyes wide when Sasori all but grabbed Pein's crotch. "...And feed them to your dog, got it?"

Pein nodded, terribly red in the face and terribly stiff, Sasori smiled and Hidan felt a spike of electricity course through his system when Sasori's little hand rubbed Pein's crotch as if soothing, Pein jerked weirdly and gasped turning redder, the greyish eyes went somewhat dreamy looking at the crimson haired devil.

"Good... I'll go and check if they need my help in the kitchen..." Sasori left then, Hidan was sure he saw the redhead crack up somewhere at the kitchen door, the shoulders started to shake as in laughter but Pein didn't see that, the tall guy was still just standing there looking dumbly at the wall, Hidan kept silent sliding his purple eyes over Pein's crotch, there definitely was some hardness there.

Pein jerked then and looked at him. "Tell this to anyone and you're dead!" the orange haired mumbled swallowing hard and going for the door to the hallway, probably on his merry way to jack off.

Hidan was laughing hard, he didn't blame Pein though he might have reacted the same way on that kind of behaviour.

...

An: sorry to stop it here...it was getting too lengthy, the next chap is ready though, so let me know what you think...

Mettlei...