A/N: Told you I wouldn't give up, but have you?
Warning: Um, you know how these go. Children beware, reading this may just cost you your innocence. Well, that is if you have any left. Who knows what you do on the internet? (;
Disclaimer: Don't own anything recognizable just my own thoughts and opinions.
PS. Have you ever noticed how amazingly poetic The Fray's songs are? I'm going to be using a lot of them pretty soon.
"So I say to you, come home, come home. 'Cause I've been waiting for ya' for so long, for so long. And right now there's a war between the vanities, but all I see is you and me. And the fight for you is all I've ever known. So come home."
I visit the girl everyday.
I don't know what about her draws me in, but I just can't help it when she calls for me in her sleep. I think it's just some silly part of me trying to fool myself into thinking she still belongs to me. Crazy as it may seem, I would always without a doubt be there for Katniss. Watching over her when she's not looking. And protecting her from a distance. Even though she's asleep when I watch her, there is some undeniable tension in the room that just proves she knows I'm there.
And that was the first step to falling in love with Katniss. Again.
She watches me.
During our physical therapy sessions. Although we don't talk as much I know she watches me. I can feel her stormy gray eyes piercing into the back of my head as if she's willing me to turn around and acknowledge them. Sometimes I do, but only to have her quickly turn her attention away. I smile and notice the slight blush that creeps up on her face when that happens. She never liked to be the one to start anything.
That was the second step.
She wants me.
Although denied the request, there have been many times when I have caught Katniss trying to sneak out at night. She would be in the middle of a particularly bad nightmare. Sweaty, screaming, and oh so beautiful. Little did she know that I was already there hiding from her needy eyes. She would spend hours arguing with the nurses begging them to let her into my room. They told her she needed to rest. That we both needed rest. I laughed at their ignorance. Eventually Katniss got tired and succumbed to sleep. Selfish as I may be its nice to know that Katniss would still fight for me.
Before I leave, I kiss her lightly on her lips and watch slowly as one corner of her mouth shifts up into her signature smirk. And so quickly – that if you blinked once you would miss it - the other corner follows.
That was the third and final step, because right now I know that nothing that could possibly happen would keep me from loving Katniss Everdeen.
I've wanted to take her home for the longest time. It's been a month since the accident and I'm only in this hospital because I couldn't bear to go home without her. I've been too happy lately and apparently Haymitch thinks it's awfully disgusting that a grown man such as my self could act so childish. But come on. She's the love of my life.
I know I haven't spoken to her since the accident, but Doc. says it would be best.
Because of her amnesia, Doctor Mason, Haymitch, and I have been planning what exactly we would do with her situation. According to doc's studies, Katniss' mind is extremely unstable and that even the slightest mistake in words could send her crumbling.
They have absolutely no records of Katniss after the war. But after her "betrayal" to the districts, no one seemed to care and those few records before the war were gone. Of course there was no one we could turn to. Katniss had no family left. Her mother was murdered a few months back and as for her father and sister, you could already guess what happened. But the most shocking was the news of Gale's death. It was a public murder. Being a high ranking officer as he was there would always be cameras around the man. In the few clips I've seen, it depicts a small figure clad in black armor as his murderer.
No one could put a face to the murderer, but for Katniss I promise I would find out who it was and kill him my self.
No one really knew what happened to Katniss within the past two years.
The story was that after the war was won by the Capitol, Katniss couldn't just have a lowly baker to protect her anymore. So she made a deal with Snow saying that she would show her loyalties to the Capitol by marrying a Capitol man and living there for the rest of her life.
That was the official story.
However I remember it being quite different. After the war we were both devastated when we lost. We lost our homes and our loved ones, but the biggest shock was when Snow agreed to let us all live. We were for sure that Katniss and I would be the first to be bumped of the list. We were prepared to die.
It had been months after the war and everything was doing well. We all agreed that the only reason they let us live was to make sure there were still people to fuel their desire for food and clothing. Regardless of their reasons we were pretty happy to be alive. The Rebellion was put under and forgotten. It only brought back horrible memories and no one wanted to tamper with that. The Games had stopped well stopped for now at least. No one thought about what was going to happen tomorrow. We all wanted to enjoy the fact that right now they were safe.
Katniss and I had grown closer. We moved in together and shared a bed. Eventually we shared more than a bed and that was more than I could ever ask for. We were free. Free from the games, from the war, free from pretending.
That was the night that Katniss told me she loved me. My heart swelled up so big in my chest. And I was speechless. She just looked up at me a smiled with her beautiful smile. She leaned in slowly and kissed me. It was slow and heated. Almost as if she was trying to force her love into me. Each second into the kiss and I knew I would be lost in her.
One. Two. Three. That was all it took.
Three seconds and I was hers. She gave me her love through a kiss and it was my turn to give her my love. And the fourth, fifth, and sixth seconds I did just that. We were one and honestly nothing made me happier and I knew that this moment could not end.
The next morning I woke up with her naked body on top of mine. We were still connected and I reveled in the feeling of her. I traced over her back and ran my fingers through her hair. I saw her smile. It was so bright it looked as if she was glowing.
She laughed. And I thrust up into her. Her eyes shot open and her mouth formed a perfectly shaped O.
"Mmmmmmm. Peeta, More."
"No." she said while pushing back into me.
"Fine then I guess I'll have to make you say yes." I gave her a couple quick thrusts and she was already moaning nonstop. This girl is so loud and she doesn't even know it.
I lifted her up and off of me. Her hips twitching and aching, slick just for me. Her attempt at keeping herself on me was absolutely adorable. She whined and pouted as soon as I left her. I placed her carefully on the bed and leaned into her. I spread her legs slowly, so agonizingly slow. And I placed myself between them. As soon as our skin connected she started bucking wildly. Desperate for my touch and as loud as can be. I lifted up my hips just out of her reach and quickly held her hands above her head. She was wild, almost animalistic. Growling and grunting trying with all her might to connect us. I teased her again and let the head of my cock trace her tight entrance.
She was practically screaming for her release her warm juices coating our thighs. It was definitely a sight to behold. And my cock did not let that go unnoticed. It seemed as though it grew twice its already erected size. I didn't mind and basing my assumptions on Katniss' reaction she didn't mind either.
I pulled out of her reach again and she was clawing at my wrists. I entered the tip of my head into her again. She was already working her hips inching me deeper into her tight juicy wet cavern. I grabbed my belt from under the bed and tied her wrists up to the bed post while thrusting into her harshly. She screamed. It was all sorts of loud and surely did not go unnoticed by someone in the district. I just hope it isn't Haymitch that heard. While she was busy working her hips on me, I made sure her wrists were secured tightly. I yanked myself away from her needy hole and trailed my lips down her plush body. Reveling every inch of this woman. I licked her taught nipples and watched as they made her face contort in the most exquisite expression known to man. I let my tongue form patterns on her soft stomach feeling the way her muscles twitched every time I traced over a new spot.
I kissed her from the base of her ankle to the tops of her thighs making every effort to not touch her most needy spot. I inhaled her scent deeply. My breath brushing over her sensitive skin. She was watching me very closely seeing what I would do next. Every time my eyes connected with hers she let out a little whimper and I swear I could feel her getting more wet by the second. I took one lick. One lick from the base of her slit to her swollen clit. And she tasted nothing short of amazing.
I felt her whole body shake with the pleasure. The sounds of her absolute ecstasy resounding around the room. I couldn't believe I made this happen to the almighty Katniss Everdeen. She was still lost in her throes of pleasure and her eyes were rolling to the back of her head.
And to think I hadn't even made her cum yet.
I flicked her clit once more and carefully tied each of her ankles to the right and left corners of the bed posts. I placed a small kiss at the top of her clit and lifted myself off of her delicious body. I watched as her face contorted into one of pleasure, to confusion, to primal lust. I moved to put on some clothes and watched her struggle with her bindings. Her back arched up off of the bed and her thighs moved closer together, trying so desperately to relieve the delicious tension between them.
"You should stop trying. You aren't going anywhere." I laughed at her. Now fully dressed.
"Peeta. Ummmmmmmmm. Let me out. Ahh. I need you." She said through clenched teeth and swollen lips.
"Marry me then." I offered making my way to her.
"No." she groaned out.
"Fine then suite yourself." She watched me carefully as I put on my boots.
She scowled at me and tried with failure sure to follow to reach her juicy pussy and grant herself her long awaited release. I ran my tongue from the dip of her chin, across the valley of her tits, all the way down to her weeping slit. Her thighs and abdomen were slick and shiny and the sheets under her were soaked up to several inches in diameter.
I ran my tongue through her slit and gathered some of her steaming hot flowing juices onto my tongue. I raked my hands up over her deliciously curvy body and kissed her passionately. Forcing my tongue into her mouth and making her taste herself. I felt her deep throaty moan in my mouth as she tasted herself her own eager lips finding my tongue and sucking onto it. The whole erotic sensation brought forth a truly surprising moan from me. I placed one finger at the end of her amazing pussy and brought it up to trace her plush lips with. She offered me a devilish smirk and sucked my finger clean.
I was lightly tracing over her swollen clit. Feather light touches when she said yes.
"Yes to what?" I said stopping my motions entirely.
"To marrying you." She moaned out loud.
"Do you want to cum now?" I teased her, putting my hand over her pussy.
"Then no." I moved away from her licking my fingers clean of her delicious juices.
"Peeta! NO. Please – I – I – I can't – I need you – I want to. Please. Yes Peeta, I – I'll marry you." she was frantic now desperate for her orgasm.
"I want you to tell me that when you are not horny." I grabbed my back pack and gave her a quick kiss on her forehead. She was speechless. Mouth to the floor and eyes wide open. Almost like a deer caught in a cross-fire. I gave her pussy a quick little tap.
She let out a little yelp. I left the room laughing like a maniac.
I locked Katniss in the room from the outside and took the keys with me to the bakery. As soon as the doors were closed I heard Katniss screaming my name along with some not so nice things.
"Peeta! You're going to regret this!" was the only PG-13 thing that came out of that girl's mouth.
I was out of our home in the victor's village making my morning trip to the bakery.
"What you do to her boy? Finally fucked her brains out?" Haymitch winked at me.
"If you're going to leave her like that, you should really think about some gags and stuff. Otherwise the whole district would know about your sexcapades." He said while patting me on the back.
"Go fuck yourself Haymitch." I said and brushed him off. As I walked away he tripped over one of his pet geese and crashed into the garbage cans.
About an hour later I came back to check up on Katniss. I had a bag of her favorite cheesy buns and some hot mint tea in a thermos for a breakfast in bed. As I was climbing upstairs I heard a crashing sound coming from our bedroom. I hurried in and kicked down the door, remembering that Katniss was bound to the bed vulnerable and had no means of defense. What I saw was even more surprising.
I looked over to the bed where I had left Katniss this morning.
She had both of her hands pounding into her aching pussy. Her right hand, four fingers deep and pumping so fast and hard the whole bed shook with her effort. Her left hand was rubbing her clit with furious abandon. She was screaming so loud I'm pretty sure that if Haymitch wasn't such a pervert he would have been up here now thinking we were being attacked or something.
Her back arched up and off of the bed while her hips slammed back up into her hands. The sounds of her flesh smacking together resounded around the room along with her screams. She was drenched in sweat and it smelled of her slick sex. I sat there watching her in awe. Although the very thought of Katniss touching her self drove me crazy, the fact that she had broken both ends of the bed post to do just that was unbelievable.
She was closer to her orgasm now and I could tell. Her screams were definitely louder and her trusts were somewhat uneven. I watched her for a couple more minutes, just staring at her face and the way her hands worked so harshly into her pussy. I also noticed the way her stomach clenched on every other thrust of her fingers.
Then suddenly she stopped. She pulled her right hand out of her sopping pussy while the left continued working on her clit. She reached over the nightstand table and grabbed the phone from the stand.
I stood there utterly confused. Who the hell could she be calling?
My question was answered when she set the phone to vibrate and shoved it into her vagina. She let out the loudest growl. I watched as she forced the phone into her hole. Every twitch of her wrists pushing it deeper and deeper into her until it seemed to have disappeared. Her body shook violently and her thrusts sped up faster and faster. She screamed out my name so loud it almost hurt my ears, but the fact that it was my name brought me extreme pleasure.
I watched as she rode through her orgasm. Her screams were so loud they got lost in her orgasm and were inaudible.
But what really got me was when she squirted.
I watched as her cum spewed out of her beautiful pussy and onto to sheets of our bed. She didn't seem to notice what she just did. She was still lost in her powerful orgasm and was trying to regain her breath.
"Wow. That was the most amazing thing I have ever seen"
She jumped up trying to shield her self from me and let out a scream.
"Peeta. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN STANDING THERE?" she said while I sat down next to her pulling her arms away from her chest.
"Not long. Just walked in right now." She let out a sigh of relief.
"Just in time to watch you break the bed posts, fuck your own brains out with a phone, and watch you squirt." I laughed at her.
She just stood there looking as if she wanted to cry.
"It's okay it was the most amazing thing I have ever seen. I love you and you're beautiful."
"Yes, I will marry you. But not if you leave me when I'm horny." She joked crossing her arms.
"Promise you'll let me watch when you touch yourself?" I laughed while she kissed my cheek.
She glared at me. "Fine."
"Okay, now that we're agreed. There has always been something that I have wanted to do."
I kissed my way down her body to in between her thighs. She just watched me and laughed as I licked up her cum from the sheets, her thighs, stomach, and her pussy. I made my way back up her body and kissed her deeply. She shoved her tongue into my mouth and licked up the rest of her cum.
"Mmmmmm. It honestly does make me so horny when you do that." She said licking the corners of my mouth.
"Oh does it now?" I teased.
She smirked at me.
"How about we let you take a break. Plus, I think you kinda hurt my ego when you went for the phone instead of me. Not to mention the beating our poor bed took"
"I'm sorry Peeta. I was under the impression that you didn't want me. And the phone vibrates. Do you?" she said glaring at me.
"I do want you Kat. I just like playing with you."
"To prove it, you can have this." I reached into my pocket and knelt to the floor. In my hand was a small golden band with the shape of her mockingjay pin etched into it. I reached for her hand and placed the ring on her finger.
"Oh Peeta, it's beautiful."
"I love you." She said while tackling me to the floor. "Well the bed may be broken, but the floor seems intact." She started unbuckling my pants and running her hands through my chest.
"I'd love you hopeless."
We made love the rest of that day. Only taking breaks for food and stuff. It was honestly the best day that I had ever lived through.
We were going to get married the very next day. Nothing really fancy was planned out. We were going to the Justice building to get our marriage license signed then have a little party with all of our friends and family. Katniss was even thinking of sending out for her mother. Then we would have our toasting at night in our house.
That morning Katniss decided to go hunting really quickly. She said that they needed some game for the party. I let her go off with Rory into the woods. I came home to bake our cake and some other pastries for our wedding day. I had to have everything perfect for today. I went and got dressed and made my way to the Justice building with Haymitch who was going to sign our papers for us as our legal guardian considering the fact that neither of us was over the age of eighteen.
I got there a little early, eager to finally get wed to the love of my life. At first we thought Katniss was having trouble getting ready. God knows that girl knows nothing about fashion, but she would always be beautiful to me. Then it was an hour past our marriage slot. Haymitch decided to send out a little search party around town. I decided to wait at the justice building until she came back.
It was night by the time anyone came back. I was already long gone.
We looked for her throughout the night, but she was nowhere to be found. Everyone else thought she had run. I didn't give up. I spent the next three days searching for her, making calls all around the district and even trying to contact Gale and her mother for information.
Then the worst thing that could possibly happen came true.
We were asking around in town if anyone's seen her again when the screen in the Justice Building went on. I hadn't really paid attention to the video. All I heard was that it was another very important Capitol message. Usually those consisted of special messages from Snow telling us that we were practically his little bitches. What caught my attention were the surprised gasps that echoed around the square.
I looked up and sure enough a gasp of my own followed on cue. There standing at Snow's right hand was Katniss Everdeen. I couldn't hear exactly what she was saying. I was just floored by the fact that she was there inches away from the devil himself and smiling like an idiot. It was minutes before the video clicked off, but the last thing I saw was a man coming up behind Katniss and swooping her into his arms. His face was blurred out and he said nothing. The audio continued playing a little longer than the video and I swear I heard Katniss' laughter and labored breathing on the other end.
I lost it.
There in the middle of the square in front of families I've known for years I broke down. I was a mess, destroying everything in my path and screaming obscenities like an idiot. It was too much for my heart to bear and somehow Haymitch knew that. He knocked me out and took me home.
I woke up heartbroken and crying with a gigantic bump on the back of my head. I looked over to Haymitch who was holding up a frying pan and grinning like an idiot. He saw my expression and stopped the bullshit.
Since then he's been helping me to try and cope with Katniss gone. He tried to reason with me. Saying that it was her nature to flee from things like this and that I should just be glad she was alive. That was the last I had ever hoped to see Katniss again.
I lived the next two years a broken heartless mess, with thoughts of suicide following me in my wake, but God forbids poor Peeta Mellark from doing such a thing,
But look at me now. It seems the heavens have given me another chance and there is no way I'm going to screw this up now. This time the nice guy will get to keep the girl.
I made my way to Doctor Mason's office. We have one last meeting before we break the news to Katniss.
"Hey kid, take a seat. You're in for a good one today." said Haymitch already working on opening what seems to be the third empty bottle of liquor in this room.
"So, you think a guy would probably take it easy on the scotch after he's been in a hospital this long." I joked while grabbing a mint from the doc's desk.
"You guys are less than half my age and you've been here many more times that I've needed to in my lifetime. I say were pretty good."
"Suite yourself. Should I go and start coffin shopping?"
"Nahh. I think I would rather just be left to rot in my house so that I could haunt anybody that tries to touch my secret stash."
"Oh you mean the stash that's buried in your backyard?"
"Who's buried in the backyard?" said Doc. as he walked right into the room.
"Haymitch. Well soon anyways." We both laughed at him.
"Keep your jokes boy, because as soon as girly goes home with you. She'll suck the happiness right out of you to feed her depressing scowls."
"SHE IS NOT DEPRESSING!" I shouted standing up and out of my chair.
"Ok. Peeta keep it down. I don't need another reason for you guys to be in my hospital any longer." He chortled.
"Okay, let's talk Katniss." We all nodded in agreement.
"What's the story?" he asked nodding towards me.
"We were going to get married, but then on the day of our wedding Katniss' mother got deathly sick and we both decided it would be better for her if she left to be with her for a while. I couldn't follow of course. I had to tend to the bakery for the District. She left for two years and her mother only got worse. I came to visit every once and a while and she did the same, but her mother had been inches away from death this year. Eventually her mother past away and as soon as she passed she came here."
"Okay so that will cover our lack of knowledge for the past two years. How will you explain why this happened to you guys." asked Doc.
"Capitol has been sending assassins. They want anyone that had anything to do with the war dead, including all of our victor friends that had been a part of the rebellion. We barely escaped with our lives, but we couldn't say the same for our friends." I answered smoothly. We had been drilling these stories for weeks.
"Good, how will you explain her wounds and tracker jacker venom?"
"She had been hunting in two. They had big game and Katniss the ever stubborn would not let that opportunity pass up. The venom came from a recent accident in the woods in which she got knocked into a nest of tracker jackers. She didn't die because she built immunity from the games."
"Goodness, the lies flow out of your lips like Satan. You intend on eating her out with those lips?" chortled out Haymitch.
I stood to my feet and threw a book at his head. He fell off the chair laughing at my chagrin.
"Okay this is good just remember to segue your conversation when it gets to the nitty-gritty. We don't want any mess ups. Call me if she has any questions about something that you don't have the answer to. I'll be here whenever you need me Peeta."
We stood up and left the room to go get Katniss.
We were just out of the door when Haymitch started talking.
"Kid I know how much you hate lying to her, but trust me if one word of the truth comes out of your mouth you'll be dead. Doc. says anything could trigger her memories and the last time I checked her memories of you didn't seem so fond."
I stopped walking and looked him dead ion the eyes.
"I won't screw this up. No bullshit. No complaining. I'll make sure she's safe with me. You know I'll take care of her."
"You sure you want her back? You have a few minutes to segue yourself out of this. You know what might happen if she gets her memory back. We don't know what she thought or felt the past two years and one day she might just wake up next to you not wanting anything to do with you. I mean she left you before many times. She could do it again."
I stared at him taking in the gravity of what he just said. I know if Katniss left me one more time that it would be it for me, but really what difference would it make. Living without her has already left me balls deep into hell and despair. It's simple I'm dead without her and even if I get a chance at having her again I'll take it. I've lived my whole life hoping to have a chance to have her and if that hope was gone I don't know what on earth I would do.
So I would take her. Damaged and all because nothing makes me feel more alive than having Katniss in my life. If she were completely without hope I would still take her. If they gave me a minute with her before she died I would take it because I know and I could only wish to hope she knows that I'd…..
"I'd love her hopless."