The first thing that registered in Kurt's head is that he was awakened by someone humming. He couldn't quite make out what they were humming, but he wasn't really trying either. He was more concerned with the fact that his eyes wouldn't open.
They felt so heavy; like his eyelids had fifty pound weights on them. And his brain felt all groggy. It was like being woken up really early after you went to bed really late.
What was with the humming?
Who was it? Why would someone be humming in his room, especially this early… It had to be early.
His first guess would have been his dad, but his dad didn't hum. It definitely wasn't a woman humming, so that took Carole out of the mix. And it sounded too… pretty to be Finn.
Thankfully, the fifty pound weights on his eyes now only felt like twenty pounds, and was slowly becoming less and less.
He tried opening them again, and this time they did. Just barely at first, but after a few blinks they opened fully… and he stared straight into the eyes of a clown.
Or at least a photo of a clown. But it was terribly comfortless. It had beady eyes, weird orange hair that was shaped almost like an upside down ice cream cone, a freakishly white face, and a smile that, in Kurt's opinion, only a psychopathic murderer should ever have.
He found himself glaring at it, although he wasn't exactly sure why. It just made him angry.
God, his head was messed up right now.
It took him a moment, but his brain caught up to him and he realized he didn't have a picture of a clown in his room. In fact, this wasn't his room at all. Also, the humming was still going on, and the person behind it was still unidentified.
Kurt figured now would be a good time to move his head toward the humming sound.
It took a few seconds for him to remember that he actually had to move his head, not just think about moving it.
He slowly turned his head to the right, his neck popping slightly at the movement.
There was a man there, humming, obviously, and also injecting something into an IV.
He was hooked up to an IV.
Why was he hooked up to an IV?
Just as he was about to begin to panic, the humming man turned to him, then smiled. "You're up!" He said, seeming too chipper. Almost like the clown, but less crazy. "Just let me finish getting these meds in you, then…" His voice trailed off as he injected the last of the medication into the IV. "Okay. Done. So, Mr. Hummel, how are you feeling?"
Kurt's eyebrows furrowed. He was so, terribly confused. His brain was still being a little slow, and nothing was really making any sense. He opened his mouth to speak, but his throat was unbelievably dry. Painfully dry.
"Here," Humming Man said, grabbing up a cup from the tray beside his bed. He pressed a button on the bed and Kurt's head and chest started lifting up until he was in a comfortable sitting position.
"Eat a few of these," He said, lifting the cup to Kurt's mouth, "then we'll try the talking thing again."
Kurt opened his mouth and a couple of ice chips fell inside, almost instantly helping his dry throat.
Humming Man put the cup back down on the tray, then took some used gloves from his portable station and put them in the trash.
"Wh- Where am I?" Kurt asked, his voice still rough, but his throat no longer hurting.
"You are at Saint Rita's Medical Center," He replied, walking back over to Kurt's bed. "How are you feeling, Mr. Hummel?"
Kurt let out a confused sigh. "I- I don't know."
"Scale of one to ten?"
Kurt shook his head a little bit. "No pain… Just weird."
Humming Man laughed slightly. "Okay. Weirdness on a scale of one to ten?"
Kurt was in no position to decide if the man was simply playing with him or actually wanting to know, so he answered. "Like a six. I feel weird, and I know I seem drunk, but if I think hard… and talk slow, I won't say anything stupid."
Humming Man laughed louder at that… Kurt noted to himself that he needed to find a shorter nickname for him. "Okay, well, that's just the pain medicine wearing off. You should be at a five within a few minutes. It'll wear off pretty fast."
Kurt took a deep breath. "Why am I here?" He asked. He started looking around the room, panic now setting it, "Where's my dad? Why are there clowns? Who are you?" He looked down at himself. His left arm was wrapped up and bent at his chest with the help of a sling, and his right leg, which was covered with a blanket, looked like it had a cast on it. "What happened to me?" He asked nervously, his heart rate speeding up.
"Calm down, Mr. Hummel," Humming Man said, placing a hand on Kurt's shoulder. "Calm down and I will answer your questions, okay? Just take a couple of deep breaths, in and out, and everything will be fine. I promise."
Kurt didn't want to comply, but the man's voice was so calm and soothing. Kurt took the deep breaths, looking up to stare into the man's eyes.
"Good," He said once Kurt had taken some relaxing breaths. "First of all, your parents and brother are all downstairs in the cafeteria. It's one o'clock, so I forced them to leave and get some lunch. They left about ten minutes ago so, knowing them, they'll be back in about five minutes.
"Second, I am your nurse. My name is Blaine Anderson, but you can just call me Blaine."
Kurt looked over the man- Blaine - and noticed the white scrubs for the first time. He felt dumb for not figuring it out sooner.
"Third," Blaine continued, "The clowns are here because you're in the children's wing of the hospital. You're eighteenth birthday isn't for two more weeks, so this is basically your punishment for not being older." He kept his face and voice serious, although he was obviously kidding, and Kurt gave him one of his famous glares.
"And lastly, you're questions "why am I here" and "what happened to me" are basically the same, so I'll answer them as one. You were waiting outside the front of your high school for your step-brother to get out of football practice. Some people took advantage of you being alone and mugged you. Broke your arm in two places, which required surgery. Broke your leg too, but that didn't require surgery. You've got some abdominal bruising as well. Your head also met the poorly paved road and you have some stitches just below the hairline on your neck. Besides that, you're doin' great," Blaine ended with a overly happy smile.
"I was mugged?" Kurt questioned disbelievingly, "In Ohio? In Lima, Ohio?"
"Yes, you were."
"Ugh," Kurt replied, looking disgusted. "I always figured my first mugging would be on the streets of New York; not in Lima."
"I'd be concerned about where your priorities were, but I'm pretty sure that pain medicine is still working through your system."
"How long was I out for?" Kurt asked, not hearing whatever Blaine had just said.
"Well, that depends. When your brother found you, you were unconscious, and you stayed that way until after you came out of surgery. You were brought here, where you were in and out for the last two days, but this is the first time I think you'll actually remember being awake."
Kurt went to speak but, before he could, Burt, Carole, and Finn made their way back into the room. Their eyes widened at seeing that Kurt was awake and they rushed to his side.
"How are you feeling?"
"You doin' okay?"
"Dude, I'm so sorry."
"I'm fine," Kurt responded, knowing it would do no good to tell them to calm down. "Tired, weird, but fine."
Blaine smiled as he walked over to his portable station and began straightening things up. "He's been awake for a few minutes. I would have called, but I knew you'd all be back soon anyway. I'm ninety-nine percent sure he'll remember waking up this time, but watch out cause he's still kinda loony," He said, adding the last part as he grinned at Kurt.
Kurt glared at him. "I am not loony."
"Sorry, sorry. Loony, no. Grumpy, yes."
"It's the friggin' clowns," Kurt blamed.
Blaine laughed. "I'll let you all talk for a while, and I'll be back in about an hour to give you some more pain meds. Don't worry, it won't be as strong as it was before. Just enough to keep you comfy."
"Thank you, Blaine," Carole replied, smiling at him as he made his way out.
He nodded back at her, then left.
"Kurt, I am so, so sorry," Finn started again, moving closer to the right side of Kurt's bed.
"It wasn't your fault, Finn… Or, at least I guess it wasn't. I don't really remember it."
Burt actually looked a little relieved at that. "There will be plenty of time for remembering later. For now, just get better."
"Do you remember anything about waking up in here the other times?" Finn asked.
"No," Kurt answered.
Finn glanced over at his mom and a tiny grin appeared on his face, but he quickly forced it away.
He, however, wasn't quick enough.
"What?" Kurt asked. "What happened?"
Finn shrugged, trying to make less of a deal out of it. "You just said some pretty funny things is all."
Kurt looked at his dad and step-mom, noticing that they too were now trying not to laugh. "I demand you tell me what I did!" He exclaimed. God, that sounded so cheesy in retrospect. He wasn't having a good time with thinking before he spoke right now.
"It's not that big of a deal," Carole replied. "You had a lot of drugs running through your system."
"Come on! Just tell me!" Kurt begged… or whined, really.
"You woke up a few times," Finn began after a moment, "but never for very long. Blaine's been your day nurse since you were moved here though, and he was either in the room, or we called him in, each time you did wake up… You made a pretty interesting nickname for him is all."
"Oh god. What nickname?" Kurt replied, closing his eyes tightly.
"It was… 'Hot Cheeks' mostly," Carole answered. She cleared her throat as Kurt groaned. "And 'Angel Cake' a couple of times. But otherwise… Hot Cheeks."
Kurt's not sure his face could get any redder than it was at that moment. He decided that he would just keep his eyes closed until they all left, but then he heard Burt snort and his eyes popped open. "Dad!"
"I'm sorry, kid," Burt defended, "but you stared at his butt every time he turned around, then suddenly declared his name to be Hot Cheeks."
"God, Dad, you're not supposed to be comfortable saying stuff like that."
"You'd also get this really weird look on your face," Finn continued, as though he hadn't noticed Kurt's embarrassment… or he was simply enjoying it. "You would tilt your head to the side, and your mouth would sorta just hang open, and your eyes would get all gooey looking."
Kurt went to tell him to stop speaking, but the door, which had been cracked, opened up to reveal a smiling Blaine. "Sorry," He said, "The next room over ran out of gloves so I'm just gonna steal a box real quick."
He grabbed a box of gloves, then was out of the room as quickly as he had come in.
"That's it!" Finn exclaimed, pointing at Kurt and pulling him out of his trance. "That's the look!"
"Shut up," Kurt said, scowling at him, "I'm still loony."
This was made after spending far too much time at the hospital over the past year. I won't pretend to know a lot of medical stuff, but I do know a lot about spending time in the hospital, (for my grandma, not me) so this is where that comes from.
I hope you all enjoy this, and that it doesn't suck. Thanks for reading and reviewing :D