Yep, you are seeing right and yes to all those who was wondering I am still alive even though the last two months were literal hell to get through.
I just want to thank all of those who send their well wishes and prayers to me and Alex after the accident. He is doing fine and was released from hospital three weeks ago and even though he has to be still on bed rest and have to under go four months of physic therapy things is going awesome.
This story was born while I was visiting Alex in hospital on a daily freakin' basis and I know there is going to be a fare few fans and friends who after reading this is gonna want my head on a pike but don't worry it has a happy ending.
Just a fare warning this has wincest! So if this is not you thing the back button was invented for a freakin' reason so use it, to those who like that kind of thing please read and enjoy.
Seriously guys, do you really thing I would be doing this to the guys if Supernatural was mine plus Gabriel and Balthazar would still be in the land of the living...I am crazy not delusional...
In Your Time of Dying
Between Shadow and Dead Man's Blood (S1E16-20)
He felt the two sharp horns pierce his chest and side the same time as John drove the tip of the iron spear through the Horned demon's heart, instantly killing it.
As it died the horns immediately retracted causing him to cry out in pain as he slowly sunk to the ground.
"DEAN!" John and Sam yelled simultaneously as Dean started to fall but before John could even move Sam, who was on the other side of the room, was at Dean's side catching him and cradling his fall as they dropped to the ground together.
Dean landed with his body right on Sam's lap, his back partly against Sam's chest and his head cradled in the crook of Sam's arm.
"S…Sammy?" Dean coughed weakly.
"I'm right here Dean." Sam assured his brother, his voice soft with not a hint of the panic that he felt ripping through him at the site of his brother.
"Don't move, okay. You'll be fine if you don't move."
Dean gave a shallow laugh making him instantly wince in pain at the action. His hand reached for Sam's and he entwined their fingers in a weak grasp.
"You s…suck at lying." Dean managed out as he coughed, a small trickle of blood running out the corner of his mouth.
"Oh God, Dean!" John said softly as he dropped down on the other side of his son.
There was so much fuckin' blood, his own son's blood.
"Dad we've gotta do something." Sam pleaded heartbrokenly as he looked up at John, tears starting to run down his face.
"I know Sam, I know." John said sharply as he pulled off his jacket and over shirt, pressing it to the holes in his son's body, frantically trying to stop the blood pumping out of Dean at an overwhelming rate.
"Sorry Dean but I gotta do this." John said softly as Dean hissed out in pain at the pressure.
"Don't hurt him." Sam snapped, glaring at John.
"Dad….Sammy, please... don't fight." Dean's soft voice begged.
"We're not fighting Dean, promise." Sam smiled down at Dean
So typical of Dean, even when he lies dying he would try to keep the peace between them.
"Just don't die on us, okay?
"You a…are such a g…girl." Dean joked weakly.
Dean cringed as a new wave of pain hit, his hand becoming a death grip in Sam's.
Sam tightened his hold on Dean, his hands and clothes soaked in Dean's warm blood.
"Please Dean, don't do this to me. Don't leave me, please. Please!" Sam begged through his tears.
"I can't lose you, not now. I love you too much."
John raised an eyebrow at this, shooting Sam a puzzled looked but he thought it best not to comment on it at that moment seeing as his oldest son was currently bleeding to death in his youngest son's arms.
"S…Sorry Sam but I don't t…think I can d…do that…" Dean choked out threw the blood in his mouth and throat…"but I love you too"
Sam smiled weakly at Dean's words saying, "Now you decide to out us in front of Dad."
"Screw Dad." Dean replied making a weak attempt at cracking a joke.
"Excuse me!" John asked shocked.
"I wasn't talking about your manners Dean, what does Sam mean by 'outing us'?" John wanted to know.
"Not. Now. Dad." Sam hissed, not even looking at John.
"S…Sammy…hurts." Dean gasped as his body seized, back arching in pain causing him to bleed even more.
"Shhh Dean, just relax." John soothed, pressing the blood soaked cloth tighter against Dean's wounds but it was impossible to stop them from bleeding.
"Yeah Dean, like Dad said, just relax, okay." Sam whispered as he carded his fingers through Dean's hair.
"Please God don't take him. Don't let him die, please don't let him die." Sam silently begged.
"Dad?" Dean said as his free hand latched onto John's arm to get his attention.
"Yeah son?" John asked, his voice cracking with unshed emotion.
"P…Promise me you'll l…look after Sam, k…keep him safe." Dean struggled out breathlessly as it became harder for him to talk.
"I promise Dean." John answered, swallowing past the lump in his throat because he knew it was already too late to save Dean.
"I swear to you on my life that I will protect him."
"Please, Dean, please don't d…die. I c…can't do this without you." Sam pleaded desperately through the sobs that ripped from his body.
"Just hang on…please!"
"C…Can't Sammy; it h…hurts to m…much." Dean wheezed out, more blood staining his month and lips.
Dean's hand let go of John's arm and reached around Sam's neck, weakly pulling him closer. Dean could feel his life drain out of him, he knew he didn't have any time left and he just wanted to do one more thing before he died.
"Just w…wanna kiss y…you one more t…time." Dean breathed against Sam's lips.
"Dean…"Sam said softly before he leant down and kissed Dean gently on the mouth.
Dean sighed against Sam's mouth and just like that he was gone.
Dead, dying in the arms of the one person he loved more than anything else on this planet...
"No…" Sam moaned out painfully as he pulled Dean's body closer to him as he rocked back and forth, heartbroken sobs wracking his frame as he wept.
John just stared at Dean's lifeless body. He couldn't believe it.
Dean was dead. Gone just like that.
His mind couldn't process the fact that he had just lost his son and in the back if his mind he was shocked to hell and back as to what was…had…been going on between his boys.
All he knew was that he had to get Sam and then Dean's body out of there because now he had two promises to keep.
One to Mary and one to Dean, find the demon and protect Sam with his life.
It took John almost half an hour to convince Sam that they had to leave. When he finally got Sam to listen, Sam merely nodded, got up and picked up Dean's body and headed out the door of the old cabin.
It took them another hour to get back to the cabins they were staying at seeing that Sam insisted on carrying Dean on his own. What scared John the most was the fact that Sam had stopped crying, he had this weird, half dangerous look on his face but his normal bright hazel green eyes were dead. They held absolutely no emotion, it was as if when Dean died, Sam died along with him and something about that look felt extremely familiar to John.
Back at the cabin Sam and Dean shared things were even worse.
Sam gently laid Dean's body on the bed closest to the door and started removing his shredded, blood soaked clothes.
When John tried to help, Sam actually honest to God growled at him; didn't say a word just growled like a wild, hurt animal.
So John was exiled to watch on the sidelines as Sam cleaned his brother, his lover's body.
Yeah, John figured it out alright. It wasn't that hard, not with Dean kissing Sam and everything, and strangely enough it didn't bother him as much as it should have.
Dean and Sam loved each other the same way as he and Mary had once loved on another. Maybe the love between them was more than it should have been but who was he to condemn a love that strong.
John's heart was broken because of his son's death (for which he felt responsible for) but also because of Sam.
He knew exactly what his son was going through, Sam hadn't just lost his brother but probably the one person he loved more than life itself.
So John watched in silence as Sam worked, helpless to help ease his youngest pain…
"Dean…!" Sam cried out in his sleep.
The only reason he was asleep was because John drugged his coffee the previous night so that Sam wouldn't finally pass out from shock and exhaustion.
Now daylight was slowly filtering in through the window and Sam was waking up to an empty cabin as John quickly went to change out of his bloodied clothes. He did not really want to leave Sam alone out of fear that he might do something desperate.
"Dean…" Sam moaned this time, voice laced with pain as consciousness and the reality of what had happened the previous day slowly started to come back to him.
Slowly he pushed himself up into a sitting position, swinging his legs off of the bed Sam pulled Dean's leatherjacket, which he claimed as soon as all the blood was cleaned off of it, tighter around himself. He slept in it because it still smelled like Dean, of gun oil, worn leather and the cologne he used.
His eyes drifted over Dean's body, now clean of blood and dressed in Dean's favourite jeans and black shirt.
As much as he wanted to he just could not stop starring at Dean as shock slowly made way for reality.
When John returned a couple of minutes later he found Sam still starring at Dean's body. The only thing different was Sam had his legs pulled up with his arms wrapped around them, head resting on his knee as he slowly rocked back and forth.
The moment John saw him he knew that Sam's shock had finally worn off and that he was now grieving completely.
"Sam?" John called softly as he walked over to his son and gently sat down beside him on the bed.
"Sam!" he said a bit louder when he didn't get a reaction.
"H…He's gone Dad…" Sam said brokenly as he looked up to his Dad, his eyes glassy with unshed tears.
"I know son, I know" John unconsciously echoed his words from the previous day.
"Dad, what am I gonna do?" Sam asked softly sounding so lost.
"What do you mean?"
"What am I gonna do now that he is gone. I can't do this without him." Sam said as his gaze returned to Dean's still form.
"I can't do this alone."
"You're not alone Sam."John said putting his hand on Sam's back.
"You still have me. We'll hunt together, you won't have to do this alone, I promised your brother I would protect you and that's what I intend to do."
"God Dad! I'm not talking about hunting, I'm talking about life…"Sam sobbed and tears started to run down his face…"How the hell am I supposed to go on alone without him?"
"I understand Sam, your brother…"
"No! You don't understand, Dean wasn't j…just my brother. He w…was the one person I loved more than anything in this life."Sam cried as sobs racket his body.
"You don't understand, Dean and I were…"
"Lovers? I know Sammy and I do understand." John interrupted
"I'm not a complete idiot; I do have eyes in my head you know." John added with a small smirk as Sam looked at him in total shock.
"And you're not mad?"
When John only shook his head it made Sam cry even harder. John sighed as he pulled him closer; his arm tight around Sam's shaking form.
"What am I gonna do, Dad?" came Sam's muffled voice as he finally and completely broke down, crying against John's chest like the two year old he once was and not the twenty-two year old man that he became.
"Truthfully, I don't know Sammy. I really don't know." John said softly as he tried to console his broken son in the only way that he could think of, by actually being there for him for once in his life.
They sat there for over an hour.
John's heat breaking even further as he tried to comfort Sam, knowing out of experience that nothing he did or say could ever ease his son's pain.
Sam was mourning the loss of Dean just as badly as he had mourned Mary if not worse.
He knew what Dean and Sam's relationship morphed into wasn't right but with their lives, the way they grew up, Dean being Sam's protector since he was four and everything they saw and did on a daily basis he really couldn't judge.
He was so deeply obsessed with finding the thing that had killed Mary that he was blind to the changes in the too strong bond that Dean and Sam had as brothers and now that he thought about it, recognized the signs for what they really were, this was a long way coming, probably even before Sam left for Stanford which would explain Dean's reaction to Sam leaving back then because Sam was reacting to Dean's death in precisely the same way just a hundred times worse.
Eventually Sam's breathing evened out against John's chest as he literally cried himself into the oblivion of sleep.
John slowly eased Sam's limp body away from him and gently laid him back on the bed, careful as not to wake him as he gently pulled the comforter over Sam's sleeping form.
Sleep was pretty much the only comfort Sam had to ease his pain and John wasn't about to take that away from him.
"I am so, so sorry, Sammy." John whispered to his son as he ran his fingers through Sam's hair before turning around to go outside.
At the door he looked back at his sons before heading out the door to go grieve for his dead son in private.
A couple of minutes after the door closed behind John, Sam slowly opened his eyes.
His Dad must be getting old he thought to himself because John did not even notice that Sam was faking being asleep.
Sam glanced a look over at Dean and fought the urge to start crying again. Instead he slipped his hand underneath his pillow and pulled our Dean' silver pearl handled .45 that he had hid there the previous night.
His fingers curled around the cold metal as he checked that there was a bullet in the chamber and pulled back the safety. Looking down at the weapon Sam wondered where its twin was since Dean never let the guns out of his sight, if they weren't on him, they would be stashed away in his duffel, never going in the trunk and always the first to be cleaned since they were Dean's favourite.
Sam had given them to Dean on his twenty- first birthday four months before he himself had turned seventeen. It was also an anniversary gift marking the day he and Dean finally slept together on Dean's twentieth birthday the year before.
Their Dad might be fine with the fact that they had a relationship but Sam didn't think he would appreciate the fact that their relationship had started when Sam was fourteen and Dean eighteen.
The only time they had been apart was when Sam left for Stanford, fooling himself into thinking that he was in love with Jess, that he wanted normal.
It only took him a few months after her death and being back with Dean for him to realize who he truly loved; who he really wanted to spent his entire life with.
Shaking his head he stood up and walked over towards the window and looked out but the world held no beauty because for him anything precious that this world had to offer died the previous day in his arms with Dean.
Leaning against the wall with his shoulder, the gun resting against his thigh he looked towards Dean and his heart clinched at the site of his lover/brother. Dean looked as if he was merely asleep and he was lying on the same bed that he and Sam had last made love in the night before the hunt.
John found it strange that Dean wanted to get two cabins for the night but Dean had insisted on him and Sam getting a separate cabin. When Sam had asked Dean about it when the cabin door closed behind them Dean only shrugged and said that a rushed two day drive did nothing good for a relationship and that he didn't think their Dad would appreciate them fucking each other into oblivion in the same room as him and then he simply pushed Sam down on the bed, his eyes having a mischievous glint in them making Dean's emerald eyes glow with lust.
When he and Dean finally fell asleep exhausted it was almost light and Sam was thankful that the hunt was only that afternoon when he fell asleep content in Dean's arms.
Sam could not suppress the sob escaping him as he pushed away from the wall and walked over to where Dean laid. He slowly got onto the bed next to Dean and before sitting down he tenderly brushed his lips against Dean's cold ones whispering, "I love you Dean."
Crossing his legs under him and taking Dean's cold left hand in the warmth of his own.
"I'll see you soon, Angel." Sam said softly as he lifted the gun to his right temple and never looking up from Dean's pale face he pulled the trigger...
With the echo of the shot still ringing in his ears Sam shot up in bed, gasping for breath, body covered in sweat.
"God! He moaned as he scrubbed his hand over his face. He has been having these dreams for the past five nights; he wasn't quite sure how much longer he could take them
"Sammy…" Dean mumbled, his voice still heavily lace with sleep as he stretched out his body which apart from his boxers was completely naked.
"It's nothing Dean, just a nightmare. Go back to sleep" Sam answered quietly as he lay back down on the bed.
"Nightmare my ass…" Dean snorted, "...You've been having some kind of vision for the last five nights."
Dean slid his arm across Sam's equally naked body and pulled him on his side, closer to Dean so that he was starring into Dean's beautiful face.
Sam remembered Dean's dead eyes from his vision and a shiver ran down his spine causing Dean to tighten his grip around Sam's waist.
"How'd you know it was a vision?" Sam mumbled, avoiding Dean's eyes.
"Dude are you serious?" Dean huffed out annoyed.
"I've been sharing a bed with you since we were little and if I remember correctly since this whole vision thing started so I think I would know the signs by now."
Pushing some of Sam's hair out of his face he added, "Now why don't you tell me what you're seeing and see if we can't figure this entire thing out?"
When he saw Sam was about to protest against them talking Dean said, "And don't even try to argue because you know I am gonna get it out of you some way or another."
Sam sighed in defeat in then simply said, "You die Dean."
"Excuse me?" Dean asked shocked. Yeah, okay so not what he was expecting to hear.
"You care to elaborate on that one Sammy?"
So Sam started at the beginning, right from their Dad's sudden phone call that he needed help on a hunt for a Horned demon right up to where Sam shot himself after Dean's death.
"Holy Shit, Sam!" Dean cursed; shocked as he himself went a little pale.
"Fuck Sammy, why the hell did you wait so long to tell me?"
"B…Because I w…was scared Dean." Sam said as he started to cry, five days of pent up emotion and fear finally cracking and spilling out.
"B…because the thought of you dying and leaving me alone scares the living crap out of m…me."
"Shhh…Sammy." Dean soothed, pulling Sam to him, his head resting against Dean's chest.
"It's gonna be alright, you'll see. When Dad calls I'll tell him we can't help and that way nothing will ever happen to either of us."
"Really? You'll ignore Dad if he calls and asks for out help?" Sam asked hopefully as he slipped his leg over Dean's, trying to get closer to him as if he wanted to make sure Dean was alive and really there with him in the here and now.
"Yes Sammy, I would. You know why? ..." and when Sam said no he continued,"… Because Sam it's not just you me who dies in that vision, you do to and that scares me just as much as me biting the dust scares you."
"I have never thought of it that way." Sam said softy, his crying coming to a slow stop.
"And here I thought you're the one with a Stanford education college boy." Dean teased gently.
"Jerk" Sam shot back with a small grin.
"So you'll really choose me over Dad?" Sam asked hesitantly.
"Always Sammy, always. You come before anything else even Dad." Dean whispered as he pulled Sam in for a soft gentle kisses which soon turned rough and heated as Sam's unhappiness slowly made way for lust. His fears of loosing Dean starting to lighten by Dean's promise.
Sam felt Dean's cock twitch and become hard against his own forming erection and Dean had him on his back in mere seconds.
Soon they were both crying out in pleasure as Dean trusted hard and deep into Sam's willing body and quickly they were slowly coming to the end of their passionate climaxes.
Almost an hour after Sam woke up from his terrifying vision Dean collapsed next Sam as they both gasped for air, bodies covered in sweat and smiling at each in pure love and happiness. Both of them reveling in the shared bond they had with each other, a bond so strong it was unbreakable even through death.
Dean pulled Sam in for a kiss, his tongue slipping into Sam's mouth just as the first lines of Smoke on the water broke the silence when Dean's phone started to ring.
Dean groaned as he reluctantly pulled away from Sam to answer.
"Who the hell calls at this fuckin' hour of the night?" He cursed reaching for his cell on the nightstand.
"It's Dad." Sam answered softly, his vision slowly unfolding from dream to reality.
"Fuck!" Dean cursed again as he saw the caller ID and shot Sam a reassuring look.
"Hi Dad." Dean greeted as he flipped open the phone and put it to his ear while getting out of bed.
"Is everything okay?" Dean asked slightly worried.
"Yeah fine, you and Sam doing okay?"
"Oh the same old, same old."
"I am glad to hear that."
"Dad do you have any idea what freakin' time it is?" Dean asked sounding a little annoyed.
"Sorry to call so late son but I kinda need you boys' help with a hunt I am on."
"What sorta hunt?" Sam actually went pale as Dean asked this.
"I've been tracking a Horned demon up in Roanoke, Virginia Blue Ridge Parkway to be exact and I need your help in killing it since you know it isn't a one man hunt." John explained.
"Virginia, Blue Ridge Parkway?" Dean repeated the location and if it was possible Sam paled even more causing Dean to sit down next to him, when he pulled Sam closer he could feel the tension in Sam's body.
"Yeah, that's right." John confirmed.
"Sorry Dad, you know we would love to help but we can't, not this time anyway." and Dean actually managed to sound apologetic even though he wasn't.
"Why the hell not!" John demanded to know, sounding more like a drill instructor then the boys' dad whom Dean thought was so typical of the man.
"Jeez Dad! Relax would ye…" Dean said as he ran his hand up and down Sam back to comfort him,…"Sammy and I are about five states away working a double haunting, fugly's already killed seven people and we still haven't figured it out, Plus we're running outta time before it strikes again and as much as I would love to see the next pompess assed lawyer get their guts ripped out one by one we can't just up and leave and besides isn't you who always drilled it into our heads that the hunt comes first no matter what?"
"Okay, okay! You made your point son; I guess I can get some help from somewhere else."John conceded.
"Okay Dad, but as long as you don't take this thing on alone and sorry we couldn't come and help."
"I won't Dean and its fine, you and Sammy just take care of things on your end and be safe as well. I'll let you guys know how things worked out and good luck with the haunting."
"Thank Dad, you too and don't do anything reckless…" Dean warned, "…Goodnight Dad."
'Night Son and tell Sam night as well."
Dean sighed in relief as he closed his phone and put it down. Before he could even give Sam a proper look Sam was on him, straddling and hugging him so tight that he could barely breathe. When Dean tried to loosen Sam's hold they both fell backwards on the bed, Sam on top of Dean.
"Thank you Dean, thank you so much!" Sam said in a rough voice before he claimed Dean's mouth in a furious kiss as they lay tangled together on the bed until Dean managed to pull away and with a soft smile aimed at Sam.
" Like I said Sammy, you'll always come first. I'll never leave you alone and if I ever do I will find a way to come back to you, neither Heaven nor Hell can keep me away from you." Dean said as he sealed his promise with another kiss.
FOUR DAYS LATER…
They finished up the double haunting (not one of Dean's lies, although he might have exaggerated on the details a bit) with a simple salt and burn.
Since the night Sam told Dean about his visions and Dean had refused to help their Dad on his hunt Sam didn't have one more single vision about Dean's death and Sam couldn't even begin to express how happy and relieved he was that, that particular premonition didn't come to pass.
They stopped at the local coffeehouse on their way out of town and while Sam went to get their breakfast and coffee Dean stayed in the car.
Sam got back just as Dean closed his phone, when Sam handed him his breakfast and coffee Dean leaned in and gave Sam a light and gently kiss.
"What was that for?" Sam asked as Dean pulled back and took a sip of his coffee.
"That Sammy is to tell you that for the first time since your whole weirdo psychic vision thing started I am actually fuckin' glad you have them." Dean said as explanation.
"Huh?" was the most intelligent thing Sam's shocked mind could come up with, making Dean laugh as Sam just stared at him.
"The phone call, it was Dad." Dean said waving a hand at his phone
"And?" Sam wanted to know as he swallowed nervously, getting a bad feeling in his gut.
"Dad called to say what happened on the hunt…" Dean told Sam, taking a gulp of scolding hot coffee, "…Dad got two hunters, Alec and Eric Hannigan, to help him. Apparently they weren't in the business to long but they were good at it but as it turns out they weren't good enough. The Horned demon killed the older of the two, Alec, just as Dad put a spear through its heart, horn went through Alec's side and chest and he bled out on the floor in his brother's arms.
"Just…Just like in my vision." A very pale and shocked Sam managed to get out.
"Exactly like you vision." Dean confirmed with a grim smile.
"Fuck Dean!" Sam cursed, hitting his leg with his fist.
"That could have been fucking you!'
"I know Sammy but it wasn't and like I said I am not planning on going anywhere in this life or the next without you by my side, may it be Heaven or Hell." Dean soothed as he rubbed Sam's knee.
"Guess you're right but I am keeping you to that promise, together for eternity." Sam said smiling softly at the man that was his whole world.
"Damn straight, Sammy. I'm always right and since when have I ever broken a promise to you." Dean smirked.
Getting and eye roll from Sam but Sam answered none the less,
"Never Dean, you always keep your promises to me and that is why I love you so damn much because you have always been there for me."
"Yep and that is never gonna change, so let's blow this joint and get the hell outta dodge." Dean said bringing the Impala to life with a low rumble from its powerful engine and turned on 'Highway to Hell' as he and Sam hit the road and on to their next hunt, Sam's fingers laced with those on Dean's right hand, happy in the knowledge that they were granted more time together and if Sam had any say in the matter they would be together for eternity just like Dean had promised him.
The End. . ...(okay so please let me know if you liked this or hated it and please don't kill me for doing that to Dean but it was the only way I could do the story. I promised to make it all good in the beginning and seriously did you honestly think I could kill Dean.
Please no flames and if you don't have anything good to say or have constructive criticism please keep it to yourself otherwise by all means REVIEW, PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE. I live for them)