A.N. Review= chapter. For those interested, I am now working on a sequel to 'Tough' and my Hunger Games finale. The former was just started and the latter... sucks. Anyways, I will make sure this one is a little longer.

Chapter Eight?

"I still don't understand...!" Justin had made a flow chart and everything. He looked it up and down. I sighed in annoyance waiting for the two who were waaaaay behind schedule.

Justin and Alex were getting along- for the moment.

"I don't see how you're not getting this!" Alex was actually pretty angry by now, a big difference between her and her brother. He would have found a way to explain it to her so she understood. His eyes knit together.

"That's it, I'm getting my philosophy books." He ran out. The room was filled with notes, drawings, crossreferenced books, diagrams, and utensils. Scribbles of translations from Latin, Greek and Mayan lay across the counter. Justin was trying his best to comprehend the bizarre.

The two had been debating the same topic for hours. My revenge had to wait- Justin had been distracted. The siblings came home at least an hour ago from a concert. It's funny how they say they have separate lives but continue to stay in close proximity. That's what I'm counting on right now.

Alex let out an exasperated sigh and flopped backwards onto the couch. She let out a yelp as she ran into 'Archetypes of Ancient Mythology: a Brief Review.' Another one of my books. Man, I was quite the author.

She threw it on the ground with a grunt. It was to be expected the Russo girl had no had respect for book-learning. It was a huge weakness of hers.

I waited and waited, fingering the item in my hand. Justin... you sweet, sweet fool. How could you love me?

He loved me. Some small part of me wants to stop this, to fly in and tell them it's okay. To kiss Justin all better and make him see. To forgive and gain forgiveness.

I steel myself.

Justin's voice carries from the next room, "This makes no sense! Explain it again!"

Alex rolled her eyes, propping her torso up, "How do you not understand?!"

His head popped out, "It's like something Max would think up!"

He disappeared again. Alex made a face.

"Fine, for the last time!" She took a breath, and, talking with her hands, explained, "When she puts the wig on she's Hannah Monatana..."

"So the wig is magic?"

"Are you sure?" He came to face her with intensity, "She could be a witch!"

"Many people would believe that."


"And they'd be wrong!"

"...Are you sure?"
"Does she cackle?"


"Have green skin?"


"Does she ride a broomstick?"


Her eyes rolled, "Justin...!"
"I don't know what she does with her spare time!"


He walked out of the room, "One more time!"

"Fine, when she puts the wig on-"

"She's Hannah."
"Right, and the rest of the time she's an ordinary girl."

"So how come she can only sing when the wig is on. Is it a psychosomatic?"
I knew from experience that he would bring out his books on psychiatry.

"Gosh, Justin, no! She just sings when it's on!"
"So she feels the urge to sing? Is that psychosomatic?"

"No! She just does! Miley puts the wig on, and she sings as Hannah Montana! I don't know how to make this any clearer!"

Justin dropped off another load of books, "But her friends wear wigs..."

"One of them does."

"Does she sing?"
"Not usually."

"Why not?"

"...Like I know!"

"Maybe she can't sing!"

"Or maybe..."
"Sometimes she does, I think."

"...Is that psychosomatic? That she does not usually sing? And why doesn't the other one sing?"

"Because he's a boy!"

"With a wig!"

"It doesn't matter! And he doesn't have a wig!"



"I was in the middle of saying 'maybe' but... okay."

"Anyways, he doesn't wear a wig."

"Why not?"
"Like I know! He has a goattee."

"...So he kind of has a wig... okay."
"Seriously, that you understood?"

I was getting impatient. Three hours on debating Hannah Montana. Who does this? And who would watch these two do this week in week out?! (Okay, besides me?)

He threw his hands in the air, "I... just don't understand."

"Then she revealed her identity."

"...What do you mean?"

"Well, she pretended to be Hannah Montana-"
"Wait! So who really was Hannah Montana?"

Pause. I want to stick a hot piece of metal into one ear and out the other. Someone save me.

"No, she was really Hannah-"
"But you said she was pretending!" Justin held up a dictionary. I can't believe he still has that in print. Hasn't he heard of the internet?! (This coming from someone who was around before electricity was invented.)

She pressed her hands to her forehead, "Okay, her name is Miley, and she has a secret identity, like those nerd books you have."

He mutters out 'graphic novels' before she can continue. Alex ignores him, as I knew she would.

"And one day she finally reveals her identity to the world."
"...No one...?"

"Some people knew, but the world did not."

Justin rolls his eyes, "No one bothered to see if she was a real person, or what?"

I roll the item in my fingers again. This is taking forever. And I should know; I'm thousands of years old.

"She used the wig to hide her true identity."
"As Hannah?"
"As Miley."

"Oh..." He thought for a moment, "But doesn't everyone notice that the Miley disappears and Hannah appears?"

"Miley isn't famous..."

Justin nodded thoughtfully, "And no one noticed that all the royalty checks were made out to Miley, not Hannah?"

"Her dad got the money, I think."

"And no one noticed her dad was getting the money."

"He had a disguise too."

"Oh, of course."

"And no one noticed it was Miley's dad wearing a wig? Did they have to share wigs?"

"It was a goattee."



I almost thumped my head in annoyance. Justin was supposed to hate her so much he refuses to talk to her. This fight... they're feeding off the disagreements. Honestly, I thought I understood Hannah Montana before hearing this. Now even I'm confused.

"What is with the goattees?! Just because a guy has a goattee means he is unrecognizable!"

"Okay, firstly, it's a disguise, secondly, yeah, you're one to talk!"

Justin blanched, "College Justin doesn't count!"

"Uh huh, let me know about that Exploding Bird."

"Oh, don't start." The two stood glaring, "And it was Bursting Eagle."
"Big difference!"

He started to launch into an explanation about the minutia when she stopped him.

"Justin! Focus!"
"Right! Having a goattee does not mean you are disguised."
"And a wig?!"

A shimmer of light and she was blond.

"Yeah... I look good!" Alex fussed with her hair in the mirror.

"It's easier if the guys aren't looking at your face, I suppose." This is going to sound weird, but when he was watching her, it was almost like he was checking her out. I know, weird, right?
Another shimmer and he was blond too. Wonderful.

"This makes no sense! I still don't understand! There is no way an international popstar could go around pretending to be someone she is not simply but disguising herself slightly! No one would be fooled, and I can't believe you actually think it is even slightly plausible!"


"Uncle Kelbo was Shakira."


They walked out.

...Guh, gah...