JJ sat in her office a case file open in front of her. She couldn't concentrate and had read the same paragraph 5times know. She knew the reason…she was heads over heels in love…and the worst and frustrating part….she could do nothing about it. She sighed. This was bad. She had to get out of this 'funk' as Garcia would put it and try and keep her emotions in check. She knew she would have if her object of affection was not her friend as well as a co-worker. She looked up and saw her through the door. Yes…her! Emily. She had her pen between her teeth lost in thought and oblivious of someone staring. That's how she liked it. God she was so beautiful. More than she could ever imagine. Her long shiny black her, her chocolate eyes and her slim sensual figure. Her laughter, her smile, her voice, her strong nature…the list could go on. The fact was she loved everything about her. JJ looked down back to her file knowing her stare at Emily would do her no good. It will only fuel the desire she was trying to maintain. She sighed again. She wished she could just get up and go and kiss her senseless.
JJ had always been interested in women. For as long as she could remember and had always harboured crushes. Several reasons made her not act it out. First of all it was her family. Being raised in a small community with certain rules she had done all she could to please her family. She had gone out with Will and had Henry but it didn't work out. She had lied to both the team and her family that she simply didn't love him anymore but the real reason she was just not into men. This was her biggest secret that no one knew about. Not even the team. She couldn't tell them. She was scared of the reactions. She went to gay clubs but no one had caught her eye. The reason….her heart was with Emily. Emily. The woman haunted her dreams every single night. It was even bad when they had to share rooms on cases. That was hell. She remembered the last time they had shared rooms. Emily had forgotten to pack a nightie so she slept in just a t shirt! That had been hard. Waking up and seeing those long smooth legs…
She looked at the watch. Shit. It was already late. She had a date. Not really a date though she had been told to dress nicely. A ladies night out with her 2 friends Sandy and Laura. She had met them at a local gay club she frequented. They had been friends since. The 2 weren't a couple but the attraction was evident. They had both tried to hook her up with several girls but none ever worked. Yep you guessed. Emily. They knew about Emily and had always urged her to tell her how she felt but she couldn't. The most important reason was Emily was straight (she often talked about her dates). She also didn't want to be rejected. She could never imagine that. She would die. She hurriedly packed her stuff but before she could leave there was a slight knock and Emily walked in. god she looked so…perfect. She was breathless!
'JJ what's wrong?' she said. This was so like Emily. Always straight to the point. "I'm fine Em. Why do you ask?" "Don't know. You just seem off. Absent minded." "No really. I'm good." "Oh. Ok." there was a long pause before she said. "See you tomorrow." "yeah. " she said and left. JJ sighed. God this was hard. She was not sure she could keep this going anymore. She had to do this sooner or later. She decided to head out and meet up with her friends. Maybe they had an idea. As she drove she wondered who Em hang out with after work besides her and Garcia. Come to think of it she had never seen any of her other friends. She decided she would ask on their next BAU girls night out.
Emily stole looks at JJ as she briefed the team. As she briefed the press. As she prepared for bed when they shared rooms. Only when no one especially JJ was watching. God this was bad. She so loved Jeniffer Jareau! So much. She did not spend any waking moment without thinking about her. Her silky blonde hair. Her beautiful blue eyes, her beautiful smile, her compassion, her sweet voice. She was the 'it' for her. She was so glad she was so good at compartmentalizing or else she would have done something stupid or sold herself out to the team. From the first day they had met she had been so attracted to the woman and had wondered how she was going to do her job. She had found a way though. It was difficult especially to control her feelings when she comforted the blonde. When she introduced Will to the team. When she announced she was pregnant. That had been so hard. God she had been so happy when she had announced they had broken up. She knew they would be nothing more than friends though but at least she didn't have to picture her with Will anymore. That had been hell. Damn. This was bad. The rule was NEVER EVER FALL IN LOVE WITH A STRAIGHT GIRL. Wanna know why? You will be so screwed that's why!
Emily had always preferred women. It was just natural to her. She wasn't exactly shy but her background said it all, she just couldn't let it out. Her mum the ambassador will certainly disinherit her in the blink of an eye. Even the team didn't know. Firstly because she had been trying to impress them and now because she was unsure of their reaction. She started biting her pen looking into space in deep thot. Something was off with JJ. She could tell and it was bothering her. She was distant, quiet and was avoiding her. She wished she knew why at least to just help her. "Emily are you ok?" "Yeah. Why?" "you seem away in deep thot. What's up?" "Just wondering what's wrong with JJ. She seems off." "Yeah. Me too" "Do you know the problem?" "nope. Better you ask than me…" She glanced at JJ's office and saw her packing her stuff. yeah. She was definitely going to. If she couldn't have her she could at least be her friend. She rose from her seat and made her way to her office.
She made her way home worried. It was clear something was wrong with JJ. What she didn't know. She sighed. She realised she needed to unwind the day. Let out her frustrations and maybe pick up another dump blonde she could relieve the stress with and pretend for another night it was JJ. She dressed simply. White top, designer jeans, boots and a leather jacket. She left her hair falling. One last look and she was out to her favourite club. It. As she drove she wondered. What was JJ doing? Penelope was with Kevin so they couldn't be together. Henry was staying at Will's at the moment. The club was unusually quiet. She always felt great getting here. This was one place she could be herself. No need to hide. Just to have fun. She greeted her friends and went for the bar.
"So when are you going to tell her?" said Sandy a stunning blonde lazily sipping her wine. They were in an exclusive and very expensive club. She would definitely not come in here at all. It was upper class with excellent music and service. Around her were beautifully dressed ladies and guys talking and laughing. It was like her usual bar except the expensive tastes. Everyone seemed to know each other and there was just great. You would never feel out of place.
"You need to or else you will remain sulking" agreed Laura a sexy red head looking intently at her.
"I'm not sulking."
"Yes you are and you need to get out of it. You work with profilers. They will get to it soon." "Am surprised they haven't picked up who you really are." "That is thanks to Will and Henry. So I take it that is why you took me here?" "Uh huh. You need cheering up. Maybe you could get a rich girlfriend by the time we get out coz I plan on getting one" Said Laura. JJ chuckled. She was so grateful. They had gone out of their way to take her to this exclusive club. She might as well enjoy herself. They began chatting about several things mostly commenting on different girls. They were laughing at Laura's joke when Sandy suddenly said "don't look but I swear an angel just walked in here!" JJ giggled and said "angel?" before glancing behind her. As soon as she saw the 'angel' she froze.
JJ couldn't believe it. Emily! Oh my God! What was she doing here? Was she lost? She saw her greet a blonde girl cheerily as though she knew her and decided definitely not. When she heard the bartender greet her by name it was sealed. Oh my God! "That's Emily!" She said softly dtill in short. shocked. "THAT is Emily! No wonder you are so smitten. I would be!" Laura said. "I thought you said she was straight!" Sandra pitched in Her friends urged her to go for it so she braced herself. She walked gingerly to Emily who was now sitting on the bar stool. God she looked so hot! She could feel several eyes on Emily. Did she even know the effect she had on people most specifically on her? "So when were you going to tell me about this?" she said standing next to her.
Emily heard the voice. The voice that haunted her dreams and she froze. This couldn't be her! She spun around and looked into the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen. The blue eyes that she felt she could look into forever.
JJ stared into Emily's amazing brown eyes. She couldn't look away from them. She read relief, surprise, love, lust and then panic in that order. Her gaze sent shivers down her spine. If she could do this to her with just a stare then God help her. She was so glad Emily was like her but then 'what if she was not her type?' obviously Emily was rich and classy compared to her. Their worlds only met at work. She was most certain she was not her type.
Emily looked at JJ deep in her beautiful eyes and got lost in the blue sea!. Did she know how beautiful she was and how happy she was to realise who she really was? At least no more hiding from each other but she wasn't still certain if she could show her feelings. Knowing she was gay was one thing, confessing her love was another. Maybe she was here with someone. This place was famous for its relaxing and romantic nature. She wanted to ask but she was tongue tied.
"so this is Emily!" said Laura breaking the eye contact as both women looked at Laura. Giving them no time to speak she said "I'm Laura and this is Sandy. good to finally met you." Emily just grinned and greeted them. They chatted just a short while then Sandy said "don't forget to tell her Jen. Its for your own good." And left.
"Tell me what?" asked Emily curiously looking at JJ. JJ knew it was now or never. She had to tell her. she could only pray Emily felt the same. She took Emily's hand and pulled her up and soon they were standing so close to each other. She could smell her drugging perfume as she drew her closer. She looked into her eyes and said softly "this." Before her lips met Emily's.
Emily was shocked at first but was soon in a fierce passionate kiss. God this was more than she had ever imagined. Fantasy had lost. Reality had won. She wrapped her arms around JJ pulling her closer deepening the kiss. When they finally cme up for air both of them were flushed their lips puffy. "wow!" said JJ softly. "yeah! Better than I had ever dreamed of." "Emily" "yeah?" "I have another confession to make." "what is it?" "im in love with you'" Emily smilled and said "Im in love with you too."and they kissed. Long and passionate. "hmm JJ lets go home." "my place or yours?"
"mine. Is closer."