(A/N: I'm only writing this because I am a gigantic nerd and I find the DinerToons very lovable. Enjoy!)

by Jill Diamond

Quinn's Dumb Diet Plan

Three o'clock. Flo was dead asleep, her legs curled up beneath her and her pillow half in a headlock.

The loud SLAM of their front door was what made her lids fly open, revealing bloodshot eyes to the darkness. She could hear heavy breathing from the living room, so she reluctantly dragged herself off her mattress, not even bothering with her slippers. She didn't even fully enter the living room; she simply opened her door and leaned against the doorjamb with a limp jaw.

"Skillet, move..." The scruffy lab jumped down from his place on the couch for his own safety before Quinn could squish him. She flopped down hard in her favorite pink sweats, shins hung over the armrest and her chest heaving broadly. Skillet started licking at her hand, which hung close to the floor, and she didn't even make an attempt to move it. Her red hair was pulled back into a ponytail. Flo knew for a fact that Quinn's hair only became stringy like that when she was stressed out. She had helped out at enough wedding receptions to know all of Quinn's physical danger signs.

"Where have you been?" Flo yawned, too lazy to cover her mouth.

"I got home...at eleven fifty-nine. By midnight...I had been ambushed...and was already making haste...down Spendalot...with nothing more...than a headlamp...and a bottle of water," Quinn huffed, her eyes screwed tight.


"I'll give you...one guess."


"...Ding...ding...ding." She moaned as she rolled herself onto her side, finally pulling her Skillet-tainted hand up and tucking it under her arm. "She says...that midnight jogs...keep you 'pumped'...The only reason...I got pumped was 'cause...I felt like a criminal...Every five minutes...I thought that Otto was gonna be right...behind me."


"How...? How does anyone...have the stamina...to go on a three-mile jog...at midnight?"

Flo crossed her arms, leaning further into the doorway.

"I swear, she must take a tranquilizer before her yoga class, 'cause that's the only time I've seen her calm."

"Please...just do one thing for me, Flo." For the first time that night, Quinn opened her eyes and looked square at Flo's stomach (she couldn't look any higher without making herself dizzy).

"What's that?"

"The next time...I think that I need to trim an inch off my waist...please, smack me if I try to tell Jo."

Flo couldn't help but crack a half-smile.

"You know I'm gonna hold you to that."

"That's why I'm asking you." Quinn was joking, even though she sounded like she was going into cardiac arrest.

"You gonna sleep on the couch?"

"Most likely."

"Well, I have to go in early tomorrow, so you'll have to wake yourself up."

"Mm, you're mean."

Flo chuckled.

"Good night."

"G'nigh..." Quinn's voice quit on her before she could punctuate the word, and she was asleep.

Flo patted her legs.

"C'mon, Skillet, you're sleeping with me tonight."