-My True Identity-
By a Midnights Dream
Disclaimer: All characters, items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.
The only sound to be heard among the wind rushing in my ears is my own labored breathing. I can't see him, but at the same time I'm aware that he's all around me: I can hear twigs and leaves snapping under his boots, I can smell the scent of his perspiration on the wind. Occasionally I catch a glimpse of his form rushing through the trees by my side. He alternates running behind me, then on either side. There are times where he even runs ahead of me and then waits for me to pass him by under the branches of the trees.
He's toying with me. He's building up this fear and anxiety by stalking me like this, treating me like I'm his prey; letting me know that he could come down and capture me anytime he feels like it. He just likes watching me run.
It's not like I'm running because I don't want him. Or even that I don't want to be his mate. I'm just…I'm scared.
I'm not sure I'm ready for this.
But you were so ready for it all those other times, my subconscious sadistically points out.
Oh, shut UP! Even she can't deny that this is different. This is scary. We're not talking about controlled movements and steady progression. We're talking about a full grown, male wolf whose sex drive is being fueled by the light of the full moon. If he gets his hands on me…he's going to eat me alive.
I can practically hear him snickering, watching the panic growing on my face and hearing my breaths get faster. I'm almost at my limit; I feel my throat getting painfully dry and achy and my limbs getting heavy with fatigue.
I run straight through a bush at the edge of a line of trees and gasp in horror. I'm confronted with a sheer wall of rock about as high as two of me stacked together. I turn around to bolt, but stop dead in my tracks when my gaze connects with two, glowing gold orbs floating in the gloom in the underbrush. "Aaah…T-Tsume…" my voice quivers at the end.
The addressed male calmly steps over the boundary of shadow into the bright moonlight, his face trained into a mild mask and his silvery wisp flickering in the breeze. Nothing about him seems threatening at all, yet I find myself retreating as he slowly starts to advance towards me. By now I've learned my lesson, and stop a few paces before my back hits the wall of rock. I'm not going to make this mistake a third time.
I revert to wolf form and widen my stance. We wolves are better at reading our natural expressions rather than our practiced human ones. We find that it is easier to read. I lower my head, growl in a low tone and feel my skin prickle as the hair on my hackles stands on end. It's a half hearted attempt to look threatening: I don't even bare my fangs…my tail is even quivering between my legs. But I'm not trying to look threatening. I just want him to know…I'm not sure I want this.
Tsume's stone-like face is unfazed. I start to fall quiet when he continues to approach me as if I weren't in the form of a growling she-wolf at his feet. His slow footsteps echo off the bare rock wall behind me and make an ominous feeling settle in the pit of my stomach. From my perspective he gets taller the closer he gets, so I'm forced to revert back to my human form; staring up at him with wide, helpless amber eyes.
"W-wait…" I stammer, pleading his steady golden orbs. But he won't stop. He won't even listen to me. The closer he gets staring at me with that vacant expression the more my fears are confirmed: He's on autopilot now and is going to have his way with me and then simply leave, just like how all the other wolves mate. He's so close now, there's nothing I can do to stop him. "T-tsume, stop! D-don't!" I yell and hide behind my arms, holding them up to create a barrier between me and him. I clench my eyes shut and wait for him to wrench me against the wall and violently have his way with me...
"Ah!" I let out a startled yelp as I feel his cool hands wrap around my wrists. "Tsume, wa-wait…" Suddenly I feel something warm and soft capture my lips, making me let out a startled little cry that gets lost in his mouth. "Mn! Mmmnn…" I get swept away in the warmth of his lips over mine, holding me captive; making heat spread across my cheeks and into every corner of my body. I whine up into his mouth as he deepens the kiss, tilting his head to the side to mold his mouth over mine.
He pulls away and I find myself shaking and slightly out of breath.
"Hey." I hear him murmur softly and feel a strong finger tuck under my chin. "Toboe. Look at me." The smoldering look I see in Tsume's half lidded golden orbs steals the breath from my lips. They're so deep and entrancing. His irises are a dark brown near his pupils, like warm caramel melting and burning to a sweet darkness. But above them is his silver brow that's slightly wrinkled in…puzzlement? "What's your problem? What the hell are you so afraid of?"
"I-I…" 'What the hell am I so afraid of'? He's got to be joking, right? How can he even ask that question? Isn't it obvious? I thought that with all the things compounding on him tonight that when he finally caught up to me he was going to essentially rape me...although it wouldn't really be rape because I would kind of want it sort of-but that's not the point! I was expecting him to force himself on me, so... "I-I just…why are you being so-so gentle with me?" I ask, my voice coming out more pitiful than I mean it to.
Tsume's silver brow furrows into a crease and the corners of his mouth turn downwards. "What? Are you saying that you want me to be rough?"
"N-no, that's not what I meant! I mean, I just thought that…" Ugh, how do I say this…?
"Toboe." Tsume interjects, effectively halting my foolish bumbling. Tsume raises his finger to tuck a lock of my honey brown hair behind my ear, and then trails his knuckle over my cheek, all without ever taking his gorgeous eyes away from mine. The butterflies in my gut quickly melt into butter, sending a flush of warmth to my insides that trickles down all the way to my loins. "Listen. I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to do, alright?" Before I can say or do anything Tsume wraps his arm around my waist and brings my body flush up against his. His skin touching mine sends faint electrical sparks going underneath my skin. His gravely, sexy voice makes his next words nearly take my breath away. "You have no idea how much you mean to me, Toboe. I'm not about to fuck this up with you."
I blink my amber orbs in shock. Well, I thought I had some idea of how much he cared for me after our talk back there in the city's outskirts. But there's something about Tsume's tone and just the way he's looking at me with those deep golden eyes that suggest that I…That I really don't have any idea what I mean to him. There's a whole other side to his love that I've never even seen before, can't even imagine. A side of his love that Tsume has to show me in order for me to understand…
Tsume smiles when he sees the realization run its course across my face.
"I want us to be together." Tsume brings his voice hot and close to my ear, making me shiver. "Please, won't you be my girl, Toboe?"
The weight of his words hit me like a blow to the stomach. But not like a stab, or a punch. More like someone's just hugged me with a little bit too much force. I mean…I've kind of known all along that a byproduct of us…of us doing it would be that we're mates.
But being mates doesn't necessarily mean that the male has to stay exclusive to his female. But Tsume is offering something entirely different than that. Tsume wants to be my mate. Mine and mine alone. And I would be his. Part of me thought that Tsume was only concerned with just the physical part of being mates but…It's apparent that he wants so much more than that.
The very idea makes a wave of emotion wash over me. To think…who would ever guess that Tsume would be interested in something like this? In someone like me? I really mean that much to him…that he would commit himself…to me…? "Oh, Tsume…" My voice trembles and my wide amber eyes glass over with tears.
"I need an answer, Toboe." He says again, a hint of his usual edge in his voice. But even he can't fully mask the tenderness that comes out in his tone. He's willing to be patient with me, but he's not used to showing it. "I don't have all day."
I bite down on my lower lip. Not so much out of indecision but mostly to beat back the tears. Straighten up, you dummy! My inner voice says. This is no time to be crying. You should be happy at a time like this. But it's not like I was about to cry because I was sad. Just the opposite…I've never been so happy in my life.
I slowly nod my head. "Yes. I…I'd like that an awful lot, Tsume."
"Alright." He says with a smile, as if he'd been expecting that to be my answer all along. In a matter of moments I watch Tsume's soft and tender smile morph into a wicked grin. "Now then, what's say we get this started?"
I'm not sure how to respond to that, so I settle for swallowing around a nervous lump in my throat. I mean…I know Tsume isn't going to hurt me but still. I-I've never had sex before. I've never even seen how it's supposed to be done! I'm more afraid that I'll turn Tsume off or I'll make things awkward for us, rather than be afraid of whether the whole thing will hurt or not. He says we should get things started but I…
"Eeer…" I just stand there awkwardly as he lets me out of his hold and begins walking backwards. I have no frigging clue of what he means or what I should do next!
Stay calm, Toboe. Just stay calm and keep it cool. Don't do anything stupid or awkward. But apparently my body isn't listening to me. My heart beat quickens with nervousness and my mouth has suddenly gone dry. In total contrast anxious perspiration forms under my arms…ew…Tsume comes to a stop and we're both just left staring at each other. I swallow and my cheeks sting with embarrassment.
"Uuuhm….uhh…" I don't know what else to do! Sh-should I try to say something sexy? O-or what? But it seems as if Tsume has already anticipated I would be like this and is way ahead of me in terms of what to do.
"First things first." Tsume says, his smirk broadening. The gesture reaches all the way up to his golden wolf eyes, making them glimmer mischievously. "Take off your clothes."
I feel my face flush three different hues of red and I physically stagger backwards. "Wh-whaat?!" Excuse me?! I can't believe I just heard him- did he actually just say-
"You heard me." All traces of his grin are gone now. His expression is flat and commanding, like an alpha. "I said get naked for me…now."
The last word snaps me into attention. His tone leaves no room for argument: a bark-like command straight from an alpha male is not meant to be ignored. His request makes a blush fan across my pale cheeks and my amber orbs round even wider. H-He means here? Now? Out in the open? I look around us, seeing nothing but the dark silhouettes of trees and rocks…Well, I guess we are out pretty far. I don't smell anybody or even any animals around for a good few miles…But that's not the point! Are you kidding me? He just expects me to-to get naked for him? And have me be okay with it? Oh yeah sure, no problem. Totally not!
"Come on." Tsume says in a flat voice. When I spare a glance upward at my steely grey alpha he's standing with his arms crossed over his broad chest and watching me with a bored expression. I can tell though that it's just a ruse to trick me into disrobing faster. Tsume can act like he's bored all he wants, but any wolf for a mile around could tell you he was more than interested by the waves of pheromones rolling off of him. But I get it…I'm getting lost in my thoughts again and he's too impatient to put up with it.
I take in a deep calming breath and let it out with a huff to steel my nerves. You can do this, Toboe. My inner voice cheers. Have courage. There's no one else around but Tsume. He says that he loves you and he means it, so it's okay. So just start slow…and take it little by little…
First I kick off my boots and socks, discarding the articles I know will be the most awkward first. My hands tremble as they rise up to the buttons of my shirt and start undoing them one by one…all the way down the front. After that's done I lift my head up to look at Tsume and gauge his expression. The male remains the same: arms crossed over his chest and his features trained into a firm expression. His golden eyes are fixed on me and stare at me so intensely I feel like they could burn holes right through my skin and look straight through me. I swallow nervously and shrug off my shirt to let it fall to the ground in a heap. I'm not sure what to do next…my pants or my bandages? I look up into Tsume's eyes for an answer but the solitary male says nothing. He remains glaring at me with his arms crossed and with that stone-like expression as if he were a statue, watching what I'll do next. Apparently he's not going to give me any instructions, so I'll just have to make up my mind…
My fingers fumble as I try to undo the button to my cargo pants. I eventually get it undone and unzip the zipper and my belt. The pants are actually about a size too big for me, so with the support of the belt gone I simply let them fall around my ankles. Leaving me in nothing but my bandages and light pink underwear in front of Tsume.
That golden glare of his sets a fire burning in my veins. I can smell his pheromones in the air, streaming out from his pores. It awakens my body and makes all the right chemicals start flowing inside of me, spurring on the primal instinct of mating, of copulating. It makes my heart beat faster and my muscles coil like I'm a spring that's being held down, ready to lunge at Tsume the moment he makes a move towards me…I'm in heat.
But now I'm not sure what to remove first: My underwear, or my bandages? Well, might as well save the best for last. I reach up to unhook the small metal hooks holding my bandages together-
Tsume commands and my body turns to stone. Stop? Does he mean…
"Take off your panties first."
My amber orbs blink in confusion. My panties first? I would have thought…But as always, Tsume is a complete mystery. Maybe he's just too impatient to wait anymore. Haa...just when I think I have him all figured out.
I shrug it off, and I'm just about to take my underwear off when I have an idea. Why just let them drop to my ankles unceremoniously? All this time I've removed my clothing in a very straight forward, simple manner. There's been no element of teasing or surprise to this showing, as I'm now realizing maybe Tsume wanted there to be. The grey male has been standing over there watching me undress, mocking me with that exasperated expression of his. He's watching me like a doctor would watch a patient strip: unenthusiastically, part of a seemingly never ending routine. Bored. Uninterested.
Hnf. I'm not sure who he thinks he is, but as far as I'm concerned he's lucky I'm even agreeing to this. So what makes him think he can just stand over there and call all the shots? He thinks he can just stand there and watch me with his low expectations? Well I've got news for him: He shouldn't underestimate me.
I hook my thumbs underneath the sides of my underwear, as if I'm going to pull them down but I don't. I bite down on my lower lip sensually and hold eye contact with Tsume as I slowly pull them down to only reveal the roots of my dark curls above my womanhood. I close my eyes and make a throaty sound as I pull one side of my underwear down while holding up the other, giving him a peak of the inside of my thigh and the side of my sex. I'm suddenly brought back to the night me and him where inside of that strip club, rather on accident really. It's like I'm right there on that stage again, in the husky gloom and among the booming music, teasing his eyes with small samples of my naughty places. I smirk. I feel like Miss Caramel Lust again.
"Toboe…" I hear Tsume warn, but I don't listen. I'm having far too much fun taunting him. Instead of giving him what he wants I turn on my heel and let a mischievous smirk pull at my mouth. I bend over slightly and dip my back outwards to show off my voluptuous bottom. I hear him take in a sharp breath behind me.
I continue pulling my panties down. Slowly though, only revealing an inch of my creamy skin to him a little at a time. Finally, when the clothing has reached the bottom of my buttocks I let it fall to the ground around my ankles. I don't immediately hear a reaction from him, so I finish bending over all the way to show him the underside of my sex hiding meekly underneath my curvy bottom. I'm about to look back over at him to see his expression when I hear rapid footsteps approaching me from behind. I only have time to stand up straight before I feel hands like iron grip my hips and something as hard as bone clothed in leather pressing into the side of one of my cheeks. I cry out mostly from surprise and Tsume pushes me backwards to bring my back flush up against his front. His fingers tangle in my hair and wretch my head back to connect one of my ears with his pair of hot, panting lips.
"Toboe…" Tsume's voice has been reduced to a feral growl that makes my ear rumble and sends shivers down my side. "You disobeyed me again."
Oh jesus. Oh crap! I've really fucking done it this time! One hand lets go of my side while the other spins me around to face him. I look up into his golden eyes and gasp at what I see there. His glorious golden orbs have nearly turned an animalistic yellow. Tsume is close to breaking over the brink and giving in to his animal side. It's a surprise he can even keep his composure when he's so close to me like this. His hand snakes around to the back of my head and he pulls me in for a heavy and wild kiss. The force of his mouth pressing down over mine makes me whimper and a gasp is lost up into his mouth as his sharp fangs scrape against my teeth and nearly cut my lower lip. His other hand which was resting on my hip moves up my side and nimbly undoes the metal hooks holding my bandages together. The fabric unravels like yarn being pulled on a knitted sweater.
Oh gosh! I don't know why I'm so nervous of my breasts being exposed, seeing as how the greater of two evils had already been revealed…The cool night air makes my pink nipples perk up and harden. I shiver…not just because of the cool air…but now because I'm completely naked in front of Tsume.
The male separates our mouths, leaving my lips wet and pink from being so abused. Tsume takes just one step back and looks at me.
I…I can't even look at him. I feel my entire face flush with heat and I twiddle my fingers nervously as I look the other way. My heart is hammering so fast, I can actually feel it thumping against my chest. My belly churns with this sickening feeling just from sheer nervousness. All my life I've worn baggy clothing that's covered nearly every inch of my body. I hardly ever see myself naked let alone…let alone showing my naked form to T-Tsume!
"Haaa…" The embarrassment becomes too much for me to handle and I clench my amber eyes shut, waiting for the next thing to happen. What is he thinking? I can't even look at his face to try and guess. Is he pleased? Is he flabbergasted? Is he disappointed? God, I just have so much low self confidence that all I can think about are negative things…
"Toboe…." The male's voice is low and gravely with what I can only imagine is want. But I still can't bring myself to look at him…I…I'm too scared and nervous.
Suddenly I feel two hands holding on to either side of my head, and their fingers thread into my honey brown hair. A pair of hot lips feverishly plant butterfly kisses across my forehead and around my temples.
"Toboe…" Tsume says again. "Jesus Christ…you're so fucking beautiful."
"H-hunh?" What did…did he really just say that?
I gasp as warm calloused fingers brush over the tight skin of my abdomen; like a painter's worn brush scratching against a smooth, virgin canvas. I clamp my mouth shut, afraid that my rapidly beating heart will flutter up and out of my throat like a startled dove. But in the process I only feel my face get hotter. I…I've never felt Tsume's hands on this part of my body before. He exhales a breathy sigh and brushes his lips against the curve of my neck. The heat from his breath, the brush of his lips, and his hands sliding across my body…I find myself suddenly breathless, and I grip on to his strong upper arms for support. The muscles underneath are corded and firm.
"Aaaah, Toboe…" He sighs again and runs his hands up my unblemished back. I nearly moan and lean in closer to him, so our bodies are nearly touching, while his fingers wrack shivers down my back. "Toboe…" He murmurs into my hair again. But there's something different about his voice now. It sounds pleading, almost desperate. But of course tinged with the edge of a possessive growl. "Toboe, please. Let me touch you."
My amber eyes flutter open in mild surprise. No way…Is Tsume really asking me for…permission? I…didn't think that was possible. For anything. I'm floored. I…I'm not used to calling the shots here. Tsume's hands travel down my skin to rest on my hips. His thumbs rest on the patch of muscle right above my womanhood and he teasingly rubs them around in little circles. The result sends little electrical sparks creeping down to my loins which ignite a growing fire of want between my legs. I bite down on my lower lip to stifle a gasp.
"Please…" Tsume asks again only this time his plea is completely breathless.
Instead of giving him a verbal answer I lean my hips into his hands and tangle my fingers into his silver hair. I pull him down for a kiss, my soft lips mold gently against his, and he gets his answer. I feel those rough fingers of his thread through my dark curls fondly and my hold tightens in his hair. I want him to go lower, I want him to touch me-
I pull back and give a breathless cry as I feel the warm, rough skin of Tsume's fingers slip into my folds. "Aaah.." He slides them back and forth, slicking his skin in the wetness that's accumulated down there. Yes…yes…Knowing nothing but pleasure now, I cling on to Tsume and start to twitch my hips back and forth. Every few seconds I feel the pads of his fingers brush against something down there that makes everything feel really good.
I've never experimented with myself down there before. To be honest, I always thought this part of my body was disgusting. Disgusting smelling, nasty to look at, and just another constant reminder why I could never truly be myself around people. In truth, I kind of hated this part of my body. But the way Tsume is caressing it, treating me like every part of me is as precious as the last; they way just the slightest touch of his sends untold amounts of warmth and pleasure unfurling in my womanhood, I realize how wrong I was to ostracize it like that.
I continue to work my hips against Tsume's fingers, working with him to try and find that one little spot that he keeps brushing against. When suddenly my prayers are answered. Tsume slides his pads up along my folds and stops at the start of them where a shy little bundle of nerves has been hiding all this time. As if he knows just what he's doing, Tsume gently teases me there with hardly any pressure at all and works his fingers back and forth in a quick twitching motion. "Aaah…ah-haa!" Heat blossoms in my womanhood and I call out his name despite myself. Tsume doesn't stop, his fingers twitching back and forth as he works up this little wad of nerves between my legs. My breath starts coming heavier and I feel myself becoming awfully wet down there from all the excitement. "Aaah…oooh Tsume…" I moan and grip on to his leather jacket near his shoulders to keep my knees from buckling. I buck my hips into his hand. Toying with that part of me makes my entrance ache for attention. I want-no, need to feel his fingers slide deep inside me. Now.
"Tsume…pleeease…" As if he's reading my mind, his fingers stray farther between my legs where he rubs the pads of his fingers over my entrance and applies pressure. "Yes…Yes…more…" I whine and shamelessly spread my legs wider. Tsume massages his fingers around and around my entrance, toying with the soft and sensitive muscles that coil and relax all from his teasing ministrations. I feel this pleasant pressure and growing heat building in my womanhood. The sensations started as a warm buzz before. But by now, Tsume's fingers have nearly riddled me raw, I…I feel like something's gonna happen. "Aah! Mmmnn!…"
"Toboe…" Tsume's voice is stern and suddenly I feel his fingers stray away from my entrance while his other hand pushes against my abdomen, pushing me away. Nooo, I whine inwardly and follow his hand even as it leaves me. Noo, please…don't stop. "Toboe," He says again. "You need to calm down."
His last two words are like a bucket of water being splashed over me, snapping me back into reality, bringing me back from the near brink that I was teetering over. I look down on myself and see that I've got one of my legs wrapped around Tsume's, and that my grip on his arms had turned into a chocking hug. I'm essentially wound around him like a sneaking ivy plant. I feel my face flush in mortification and I awkwardly peel myself off of him. God, what a virgin-like thing to do. To get so carried away with barely any foreplay at all, moaning and screaming, and plaster myself to him like I was drowning. I…I feel so juvenile.
"Ah…jeez, I'm sorry Tsume…" I say, my breath a shaky whisper. I look down at the ground, completely embarrassed. I'm just realizing now how fast my heart is beating, like it's going to tear out of my chest at any moment. My head is spinning with a maelstrom of chemicals and emotions. Taking myself away from Tsume and his ministrations is like coming down from a high of some sort of drug, slowly coming back to realization while having to deal with the after affects of said drug.
Tsume's voice, firm like the voice of reason, cuts through the foggy state of my muddled mind. "It's alright, Toboe. You need to just calm down. If you keep going the way you're going this will all be over before we even start."
Only now after the foggy clouds of lust and ecstasy have cleared my mind do Tsume's words start to hold reason to me. He's right. Even though I'm not really sure what he means with 'it being over', I know he is right about one thing…I was getting far too carried away for something so small…and yet in total contrast, Tsume seems like he's calm enough to keep a level head about things. So I guess that means…that he's not as into this as I am.
I let out a sigh and drop my gaze to the ground as I finally catch up to my breath. Of course, Tsume has dealt with me enough times to know when I'm sulking so he immediately takes notice.
I feel his shoulders heave in a sigh. "What is it this time?" He asks, almost exasperated.
"Well, nothing. It's just that…well…" I bite down on my lower lip. "You don't seem to be as…excited, that's all." I guess I'm not that much of a tease after all.
Tsume makes a noise and I look up at him to see both of his silver brows raised in an incredulous expression.
"'Not excited'? Are you kidding me?" He opens his mouth to say something more, but then decides to save it and shakes his head. His lips twitch up into a smirk, only deepening my confusion. "Well, I could sit here all day and tell you otherwise…" Slender fingers wrap around my wrist and guide my hand down between Tsume's…oh my! My fingers come into contact with something as hard as wood slightly throbbing against the tight fabric of Tsume's pants. The lump runs up the entire length of my hand and then some…I can actually feel the blush deepen on my face and go all the way up to the tips of my ears. "But I'll just let this do the talking for me."
My amber eyes flutter rapidly and my fluster-level goes into over-drive. The very idea of what I'm touching has me paralyzed with…with…I'm not sure exactly what, but I can't move either way. I'm touching Tsume's…How could I have missed this thing? 'Not excited'. Well, I guess it's pretty obvious that he is!
"Now it's your turn, Toboe."
Hunh? I blink my amber eyes up at him. My turn? For what, exactly?
Tsume moves my hand that's positioned over his groin up to the crazy zipper of his leather jacket. He leans down to bring his mocking golden gaze level with mine. "Undress me."
His tone is commanding, but it has the opposite effect on me. Instead of spurring my body into action, his order makes my muscles freeze in place. Undress him? As in, like, t-t-take all his clothes off? The shock must be palpable on my face, because Tsume molds his fingers over mine and makes them grip the small metal zipper of his jacket. "Here…" He brings his sultry lips over mine and speaks softly against them as he pulls my hand downwards, making me unzip his jacket in the process. "I'll even help you."
The zipper makes that characteristic noise as it comes undone; making the dropping feeling in my stomach worse and worse the farther it goes down. My amber eyes drink in the image of Tsume's grey under shirt. It isn't as pleasant as seeing his skin, but it's still a part of him that I hardly ever see that it's just like looking at him naked. His jacket is finally undone and Tsume wastes no time in shrugging it off…oh my…to expose his long and lean tan arms. Scars that were previously hidden by his jacket are now all visible against his skin like flecks of moonlight. There are a lot of them, both big and small, all up the length of his arms…I'd be lying if I said it didn't turn me on.
"Now this." Tsume brings me back to the moment at hand and tugs on the hem to his grey wife beater. I never noticed before, but now I see that Tsume's grey shirt cuts off well above his tight, flat mid drift. Not that I mind, or anything. I simply hadn't ever noticed. I hook my fingers under the material and I feel a jolt of energy course through me when my skin brushes up against his. So warm, and so firm…I want to see more of him.
Eager now, I pull the garment up and he helps me to work it off of him. The result leaves me breathless. I'm suddenly brought back to the bright, white snowy field on the day that Tsume had his chest injury. When he had to take off both his shirt and his jacket for me, and I got to see his tanned, muscley upper body. Back then, his skin looked a bit ashen from blood loss, and his body was weary from lack of sleep and nutrition. Not to mention there was a deep, red, gory mess marring the beautiful planes of his chest. But now his wounds are all gone, and nothing but his white hot battle scars litter the canvas of his skin. My amber eyes round and selfishly drink in the image of my mate's body. His defined chest and pectoral muscles make my mouth go dry. But the sight of his flat abs that plunge down his front and disappear into his pants is enough to make my mouth start watering again. His nipples are a full, brown color; a few shades darker than his skin. My fingers itch to reach up and brush over them, and a distant place in my mind wonders if his nipples would be as sensitive as mine are.
"Like what you see?" Tsume smirks and I blush when I realize I've been caught staring at him.
"Y-you wish!" I huff, trying to brush it off like I'm not the least bit embarrassed. But it's a futile attempt, seeing as it's exceedingly obvious that I am. Tsume's chest quivers in a short, snarky laugh.
"You're so full of it."
A brief silence lapses over us then, and my flustered feeling is replaced by a somewhat awkward one. Uhhhmm…He's just standing there looking down at me. His golden eyes are patient, and seem to hold an unspoken command …Does he…want me to do something? Without knowing why my hands start to gravitate towards Tsume's skin. I feel shy about touching him, but I don't stop myself. I push past my timid feelings and force myself to keep going. I splay my fingers across the flat planes of his chest and he takes in an audible breath. His skin is so smooth and warm…I can feel the steady thrumming of his blood underneath his skin, like a maelstrom of energy and emotions, instincts and chemicals is raging inside of him. And the only thing separating it from me is his thin layer of olive tan skin.
I fan my fingers out against his skin to brush against his nipples, curious about how he'll react and what they feel like. The skin is soft, softer than his regular skin and I hear a noise die in the grey male's throat. After purposely brushing my fingers against his sensitive spots I move my hands downwards, running my fingers over his ribs and down the wall of muscle that's his abs.
"Haaaa…Toboe…" The male lets out in a breathy sigh and his golden eyes flutter close. I marvel at how firm Tsume's flesh is beneath my fingers. His body is so chiseled and firm where mine is soft and smooth. Pale pink fingers against olive tan. Gold and steel-grey against honey brown.
"Toboe…" Tsume's voice is husky and low as he takes a hold of my fingers and brings them down to rest on the hem of his pants. "Undress me." He said again, but this time the weight behind his words is much heavier. He wants me to…to…I can't even finish thinking it!
I look down to see Tsume's generous length straining against his pants, begging to be let out and be given some affection. My stomach dips and clenches both with excitement, desire and nervousness. My fingers are shaking as I try to undo the buckle to his belt, and then the button to his pants. It's kind of hard to undo…they're so freaking tight! For once I curse the tight piece of clothing that shows off all the contours on his lower half. He works with me and I finally manage to get it undone. Next is the zipper…Oh gosh…My heart stutters with anxiety. All I have to do is pull down his zipper and-I steel my nerves and grab on to the metal tab and pull. If Tsume is going to be my mate, I tell myself, then I must be acquainted with every part of him.
Bright silver roots contrast against tan skin. Too scared to see the rest, I close my eyes and pull his zipper all the way down at once. Through the fabric of his pants I feel his member throb once and then push its way out between the folds of fabric; I hear Tsume let out a sigh of relief in response. I feel something hot and smooth brush against the back of my hand…
I still have my eyes closed, but I know exactly what just brushed against me…and the very idea of it-! I don't know if my face can get any redder.
"Toboe…" Tsume drawls in his masculine, sultry voice. His hand wraps around my wrist and I take in a loud gasp as he makes my fingers brush against his manhood. "Play with me."
I open my eyes now and my jaw pops open. Staring up at me is the impressive length of Tsume's cock. At first…I'm just surprised of his size. I haven't often fantasized about the male anatomy, but I still didn't think that nature would have intended something of this size to be practical. Was Tsume just…well-endowed? Or maybe it's my lack of experience…But even aside from his length…he's just gorgeous down there. A neat patch of dazzling starlight-silver hair is above his rock hard flesh. The sight sparks a fire in the dark and dusty instinctual corner of my mind and sets a fire there. And in my loins. It fuels me on as I reach up and give Tsume what he asked for: I boldly wrap my fingers around his shaft and-oh my! The feeling is all together different from anything I've ever touched…he's warm and hard, yet soft at the same time. Like a piece of steel wrapped up in warm velvet.
Tsume rests his hands on my shoulders and leans his head against mine.
"Toboe…" He growls in a dangerous tone. "If you don't move your fucking hand right now…I'm going to rip you a new one…"
He doesn't have to ask me twice. I start to stroke him up and down and the skin on his member moves with me. At first I think it hurts him but from the shaky breaths he's taking in I'd say that it's far from hurting him. I tighten my hold just a little bit and feel every ridge and bump of muscle in his cock. Tsume stiffens and he lets out the most beautiful noise I've ever heard him make.
"Aaaah…yeah…" His hold tightens on my shoulders and he starts swaying his hips in time with my hand. Oh my god is he precious. I've never felt this type of feeling before. I feel in control, powerful even. I have the most sensitive part of Tsume's body in the palm of my hand, working him up and down. I have complete and utter control over him. I flick my thumb across the head of his member curiously, wondering what it would feel like. Something hot and wet stains my fingertip and Tsume takes in a sharp but short breath.
"Haaa, Toboe…Don't do that."
Don't do that? I repeat inwardly. But why? He seemed to really like it…Not really seeing how this could possibly go wrong, I do exactly the opposite of what Tsume says and tease my thumb around and around the soft head of his cock.
The result makes Tsume spasm and dig his nails into the skin on my shoulders. He produces a tight 'ngh' sound and he presses his forehead down against the top of my head. "Aaaah…Toboe…" His voice, hot against my forehead, is shaky from shivers racking his broad shoulders. The reactions I'm getting from Tsume encourage me to keep experimenting with his body. I've never felt anything more rewarding than hearing this man moan. It sends shivers to my very core, and hearing the sweet peel of his voice feels just as good as his fingers stroking me. My hands leave him for only a moment to try and remove the rest of his pants-
When Tsume snatches them away and hold them in an iron-like grip.
"No more…" He growls. I swallow nervously because I think I might have just overstepped a boundary. Tsume's hands are on my body again, sliding over my hips and down my backside to rest behind my legs. He suddenly lifts me up by my legs, making me gasp and I have to wrap my legs around his torso to keep myself from slipping out of his hold.
"Ts-Tsume!" I cry and quickly lock my hands together behind his neck to keep from falling backwards. "Wh-what're you-?"
"No more waiting, Toboe." Something's different about Tsume now. There is no trace of the calm, experienced adult who stopped me from going over the edge earlier. Instead, his voice is raw with want and his eyes have taken on a startling yellow again. This is exactly how I thought Tsume would look when he first found me coming out of the woods: wild and sexually starving. I'm not sure what I've just done, but I kind of have a feeling like maybe I should have listened to Tsume when he said not play with that part of him. Tsume's walking toward the rock wall that's behind us now at a fast pace. "I'm gonna make you mine. Now."
Tsume's words are heavy and final, like a guillotine coming down on my shoulders. I know I should be excited (in more ways than one) but I still can't help but feel a little scared. I've never had sex before. Will it hurt? I've heard humans say that it hurts. I mean, everyone says that it's supposed to feel good but…I spare a glance down between our bodies trying to catch one last glimpse of Tsume's member…how is all of that supposed to fit inside of me? I swallow loudly and take calming breaths. Well, it had to happen sooner or later, Toboe. Just be brave and get through this. We have no right to be scared when we have no idea what to expect-
I'm in the middle of my self-coaching when the cold, rough wall of rock meets my back. I can finally relax my grip around Tsume's neck and lean back against it. To be honest I'm not sure what he's doing…
I let out a startled cry and tense as I feel Tsume position the head of his cock right up against my entrance. Oh god! Oh jeez!-
"Toboe. Toboe!" Tsume murmurs again and again, trying to get my attention. I hadn't noticed, but apparently it was very obvious that I was in distress just now. "Just calm down, it'll be fine."
"But I don't know if it'll be fine, Tsume…" I whimper and try to slow my rapid breaths. "I…I just don't want it to hurt."
"Oh, Toboe…" Tsume sighs exasperated. He leans his forehead into mine and lets his eyes roll close. "Do you honestly think that I'd hurt you?"
Well…maybe not on purpose. The words form in my mouth but I keep my lips firmly shut. That's the last thing we need right now is to start an argument. Instead I drop my amber gaze and let out a muffled, "No…"
"Trust me, Toboe." Tsume says, and when he opens his eyes to look at me his irises have returned to his calm, normal gold. "I know what I'm doing." The male lets me gather my thoughts for a moment before giving me a white hot reminder of where his member is waiting for the answer. He starts to sway his hips back and forth, nudging against my entrance and brushing against that little bundle of nerves that makes heat bloom in my womanhood. It makes the fear in my gut melt away and instead lust envelopes me into her warm and tingly arms, making it very difficult to think about saying no. "Whatta ya say, Toboe?" Tsume's question is a hot and gravely against my ear. "Let's get this thing started already…"
Tsume's words send a sweet pang of want to my nether regions. The sudden feeling is enough to make me gasp. In my heart, I know I feel the same way. I've been lots of places, and met lots of people, but I know that there is nobody else I would be comfortable doing these sorts of things with other than Tsume. Even with all of my insecurities, I know I want him to take me too. I want him to make me his. It appears that at the moment my voice is failing me, so instead I settle for a subtle nod of my head and feel the blush spread afterwards.
Tsume doesn't need to be told twice. He's very considerate about it though, he doesn't just thrust up inside of me all at once like I expected him to.
"Just relax, Toboe…" He encourages with a soft tone and I take a few deep breaths to try and relax my muscles. He starts leaning forward, I can feel myself stretching and then-
"Ah!" It's as if something breaks and he slides the remainder of his length up inside of me. The feeling surprises me more than it actually hurts. But after the initial shock wears off I'm aware of a mild sore and stretching feeling. Still though, it's not as terrible as I imagined it would be. And that's saying something, considering how low my threshold is for pain.
I'm just noticing now that all of Tsume's muscles are tensed, like he's holding himself back from doing something.
"Toboe…" He says, his voice sounding as if someone has him by the throat. "Are you…rrrmmmnn…okay…?"
"Mmmnn…" I pause for a few moments before answering him, allowing myself to adjust to his length. The pain between my legs is still there, but the continuous aching of the stretching has morphed into a dull, throbbing discomfort. "Yeah…yeah I-I'm fine." Tsume's shoulders start shaking from short bursts of breath. "What's the matter?" I ask, feeling my concern rising. "A-are you hurt?" Maybe he's just having a hard time holding me up against the wall for so long or something.
"No…" He says, though his voice is tinged with a growl as if he's in pain. "God Toboe…you're so fricking tight all I wanna do is just pound into you…" He says in a growling tone which takes on a whole new meaning for me and I feel the smart bite of his nails as he digs them into the soft flesh of my bottom. The male lets his head come to rest in the crook of my shoulder and he starts to shifts his hips around impatiently. "Please, Toboe…" Dear god, his voice is nearly pleading. "Can I please start moving now?"
I swallow nervously and weigh the options in my head: one, tell him what I'm feeling which is no because I know that moving is going to lead to discomfort. Or two, stick it out for Tsume (because I mean honestly, just look at him right now) and hope that the sore and uncomfortable feeling goes away. Then again I think about it and I'm like…he's already inside me, how on earth am I going to tell him no? I'm already half way there. Might as well just bring it all the way home by having him move. Knowing that my next words are about to bring me an untold amount of unpleasant feelings, I force my mouth to say the words, "Yeah, it's okay now."
You'd have thought I just told Tsume he could stop holding his breath. The male lets out a long breath I hadn't realized he'd been holding and his muscles relax as he starts to slowly swing his hips out…drawing out his member in the process…
I hiss through my teeth and dig my nails into the skin on Tsume's shoulders as the smart pain flares up again down there. "Tsume…" I warn in a tight voice.
"Believe me," He answers promptly in a shaky voice. "I know. Just relax, alright? I'll only go slow until it doesn't hurt anymore."
"Okay." I say meekly, and try my best to stay calm and forget about the hot, achy, stretching pain. Thankfully things are nice and lubricated down there, so I don't have to worry about the ungodly friction of dry skin dragging against skin. Tsume does just as he says and only draws himself half way in, and half way out. Slowly, as to get me accustomed to the moving and the stretching.
"Haaaa…" I whimper and hold on tighter to his shoulders. He's being so patient and slow, even though I can physically feel his muscles holding himself back. When I think about how much Tsume is holding out for my sake, it makes me want to hang in there just a few moments longer and put up with this uncomfortable feeling.
But then, just when I think that this is never going to start to feel any better, I feel a faint spark of warm pleasure between my legs as Tsume rocks his hips forward. He keeps going at his steady pace, and that one spark steadily kindles into embers. I hadn't noticed but the tearing, stretching feeling is all gone, and the hotness is fading into meek little pulses of pleasure.
"Mmm….mnnn…" My nails free themselves from the flesh on Tsume's shoulders while more whimpers die in my throat.
Tsume picks up my subtle cues and experiments by starting to draw himself in and out just a tinsee bit faster, though he's sure to keep his thrusting down by half.
The result pulls the breath from my lungs, and this time I'm digging my nails into Tsume for an entirely different reason. "Aaah…aaah, Tsume…" I whimper.
The male growls and nuzzles his face into the crook of my shoulder while he continues to slide in and out of me, picking up the length of his thrusts.
The stretching and burning uncomfortable feeling is completely gone now. Tsume is rocking his hips back and forth in such a way that he's drawing almost his entire length out before going back in at a reasonable pace, and it doesn't hurt at all. In fact, quite the contrary...My heart flutters, my vision is swimming, my muscles down there relax and clench around him in excitement. Heck, even the pads of my feet are tingly. My leg muscles relax to spread themselves open a little wider to give him better access…hoping he'll go faster.
But he doesn't, he just keeps entering and leaving me at the same, steady pace. I just can't understand why. It feels better the fast he goes…why wouldn't he just go berserk? I want him to. I want him fuck me so fast and hard down there I won't even know what's what any more.
"Ts-Tsume…" I say, why words coming out through my pants. "Fa-Faster…mmnn…please…"
As if he'd heard the exact opposite of what I said, Tsume brings his hips almost to a screeching halt, only keepings his thrusts painfully slow. He presses his lips against the hair over my ear and his fangs brush up against the shell to my ear.
"What's that…Toboe?" He asks through his heavy breathing, and gives his hips a purposeful swift jerk upwards. I cry out as it sends a thrill of ecstasy through me. "What do you want?"
"I…I…" I can't even think coherently let alone speak. I already asked him for what I want, why isn't he giving it to me?
"Tell me what you want, Toboe…" Tsume says again, keeping his thrusts painfully slow but deliciously rough; making me faintly cry out every time he rams me. Uugh! Doesn't he get it?! Faster…faster please.
"I wanna hear you say it again…but this time…" Tsume pulls away to look at me with half lidded, wild-yellow eyes. "I wanna hear you beg for it."
If my cheeks weren't blushing before they are now. "B-beg for it?" Why? Why is he being so mean? Why doesn't he just give me what I want already?
"I wanna hear you talk dirty to me, Toboe." Tsume says, running the tips of his pointed fangs up the length of my creamy neck. The way his low, gravely voice caresses those words sends a pleasurable shiver through me and makes me flush a shade darker. Plus, the way his canines are teasing that sensitive part of my skin…
"Haaa…aaaah!" I whine and cry out as he once again completely sheaths his member up inside of me.
"Tell me what you want, Toboe." He asks again, and for what I know is the final time.
I clench my eyes shut and feel all of the heat flush to my face. "Mmmn…g-gimme more, Tsume…" I whine, his name barely coming out as a whisper. "D-don't stop…givit to me faster…please."
Tsume's resolve crumbles as I see his brow furrow and hear a deep growl rumble in his throat…I moan…his hips really start to pick up their pace."Ah, shit…Toboe…" He groans and buries his face into the crook of my neck, his hot breath fanning against my skin.
"Aaah. Ah! Tsume…" I yell breathlessly and let my head fall back against the stone wall as I grab a fistful of his starlight hair. Completely lost to animalistic lust now, Tsume runs the tip of his tongue up my exposed throat and brushes his fangs against my skin, knowing how much of a turn-on it is for me. The noises from our sex can be heard between our ragged breathing from the depths of our bodies. Very faint, wet sounds that for some reason really turn me on and send me to a very primal, instinctual part of my wolf-mind.
"Uuuhhh, yeaah…" Tsume growls between his ragged breaths and his thrusts get rougher. "You like that, don't you? Rrrrrr…say my name, Toboe." He growls it, but it almost seems like he desperately needs to hear me say it.
Oh, god! Tsume's wild thrusts hit a place up inside of me that makes everything twice as sensitive as it usually is…It makes me hot and makes my muscles clench around him. I let out a breathless scream and rake my claws down his back. "Aaaah, y-yes, yeess Tsumee~"!
I feel the palate of my skin flush two different shades of red as I realize how whorish I sound. "Aaaaha…mmore…" I beg breathlessly into Tsume's open, panting mouth. "Uuuhh! G-gimme more, Tsumee…Don't stooop…"
"Rmmmmm Toboe…" Tsume growls, brushing his fangs against my lower lip. Through the thick fog of lust clouding my mind I notice a light flush to Tsume's cheeks and his silver brow furrowing upwards. The male presses his lips over my own and our mouths get locked in a wet, heated combat of tongue and fangs. He pulls away after a moment, both of us nearly out of breath, and a strand of wetness connects his tongue to mine.
"Jesus, Toboe…" Tsume's voice is raw and wrung out. "You're so fucking tight…" As he says this he hungrily digs his claws into the soft flesh of my bottom.
By now I'm completely dizzy. I'm gasping for air like a fish out of water and every thrust Tsume gives me sends a thrill of ecstasy through my entire body; all around my womanhood, to my stomach, all the way down to the tips of my toes. The place he's hitting up inside of me is getting raw and sensitive from all of the nudging and sliding and pressing of his manhood. What made me breathless before is now having me see stars and making me swing my hips in time with his thrusts to get him in deeper, to get him in harder, to hit that oh-so delicious spot inside of me-
"Aaaahh~! Yes! Uhhh, Tsume, givit to me right there~" I purr, and flush in mortification at how shamelessly I beg him and at how loud I'm being. But Tsume doesn't seem to notice. In fact, he gives me just what I ask for by keeping his pace consistent in just that one spot.
I feel myself climbing higher and higher, like I'm ascending a steep mountain with thinning air that leaves me gasping for breath. The fluffy layer of lust around my brain gets thicker and thicker, and soon all I can do is close my eyes and lose myself. My heart beat skyrockets, I feel the pleasure steadily building inside of me, to the point where I'm screaming with every thrust he gives me.
"Ah! Ah! Aaaaaah~! Tsu-Tsume I- s-su-something's...Ooohhh~!" Suddenly, I feel all of my muscles down there start jumping with spasms that I'm helpless to control. "Aah! Y-Yes! Yes!" I scream blindly as I reach my climax and Tsume mercilessly hammers me home. I feel my whole lower section of muscles clench deliciously and squeeze around Tsume.
"Aah! Aaah. Aaah…haahh…" The spasms of pleasure start decreasing gradually until they are just dull waves. My heart rate is still racing, but instead of feeling like I'm climbing up hill, I know feel like I've reached the top of it and am coasting down the slope. My head swims and feels as though I'm looking at everything through murky water. My eyes roll close and my head falls back. I slump back against the rock wall, limp, shivering and completely defeated. I make an effort to keep my hold around Tsume's neck so I don't fall but I can barely keep my legs up any more...what in the world just happened to me? Why…why I am suddenly so...
I don't know why, but Tsume is still going though. And not that it doesn't still feel nice but…I think I'm done now. Shouldn't he be?…why is he… "Tsu…ha…Tsume?"
Tsume's face is trained in an expression of what would seem is extreme concentration. His thrusts are still short and fast, but I can hardly feel them by this point. Faint, infrequent grunts leave his slightly parted lips and a band of light sweat is beading around his brow. Suddenly, Tsume starts moaning, sounding as if he's about to sneeze.
"Aaah. Aaah! Ah! Rrrg!" Suddenly his face twists just like he's in extreme pain and he slams all the way up inside of me, holding himself there. He lets out really ragged breathing and his hips spasm as…as something warm and wet seeps out of me around his member.
"Ts-Tsume?" I asked cautiously, but concerned. "Ar-are you okay?"
Tsume can do nothing but gasp for air for a few moments. But then eventually a big, goofy grin breaks across his face and he presses his sweaty forehead up against mine.
"Haa…haa…haa…yeah, I'm more…than okay…Toboe." He responds totally out of breath. "Why…the hell…wouldn't…I be?"
"W-well, I just…just a minute ago you looked like you were hurting really bad. Did something happen?"
Tsume's shoulders shake as he lets out the most wonderful laughter I've ever heard. "Toboe," He says. "You…really are a…fucking idiot, aren't you?"
"H-Hey!" I yell at him and blush. Jerk! That's the thanks I get for being worried about him!?
"I'll tell you what happened just now." He says with a snarky smirk. Tsume yanks himself out of me and along with it comes a flood of warm, milky liquid flowing out of my entrance and down the back of my leg. Tsume brings his lips up to my ear and whispers really husky and low. "I just made you mine, that's what I did."
My amber eyes round like saucers and I feel a dark red blush heat all the way up to the tops of my ears. I-I know what he's saying is true but t-to just say it s-so dirty… "Ts-Tsume…" I whine and clench my amber eyes shut, too mortified to look anywhere right now.
Tsume plants a kiss on my cheek. "Congrats, babe." Babe. He called me babe…huh. I suppose the word should send a thrill through me, but for some reason it feels as natural as if he were meant to call me that all along. "I'm all yours now. Don't you feel freakin special?"
The amount of sarcasm in Tsume's voice and in his snarky smile is enough to make me giggle, and soon Tsume joins me with his soft, rumbling laughter. We both laugh for a few moments before we fall quiet and take bliss each other's company. I smile like a big buffoon and bring myself against him for a tight hug and he hums in contentment as he holds me back. I feel like I could stay like this forever in his arms, him loving me and me completely and hopelessly loving him. I am his and he is mine. I never want this moment we're having between us to end, but I know that sooner rather than later it must.
"Toboe." Tsume says to me, and I'm reluctant to answer, knowing that he's about to suggest that we get going. "….Toboe…" He says again when I don't answer.
"Don't you wanna put your clothes back on?" I can hear the smile in his voice.
"….No, not necessarily."
He gives a curt laugh. "You don't care that you're ass naked out in the open?"
"Not really." I say honestly. "Do you care?"
"Toboe…" He growls against the honey brown hair covering my ear. "If I had things my way, I'd have you naked all the time."
Well there you have it. Once again Tsume proves that no matter how many times I blush in a single hour I'm always capable of blushing again and possibly even worse than I did before.
"But we should probably think about heading back soon." Tsume gently sets me down on my feet and I have to steady myself by holding on to his shoulder as I nearly wobble over. Tsume keeps a firm hold on my waist and flashes me a cocky half grin. "Made you weak in the knees, didn't I?"
"N-No!" I snap at him but to no avail. "M-maybe I'm just having trouble standing because I haven't stood up in a while. Ever think of that?"
"Pfft, yeah sure." He's hesitant to let go of me but I make the effort to stand on my own. Tsume turns his gaze towards the heavens to look at the position of the moon in the sky. "Anyway, like I said. The moon's almost in the middle of the sky. It'll be time to meet with the others soon."
I turn away from him so he can't me my painfully obvious crestfallen face and hold my hands close to my chest. "But…" I meekly protest. "I…I don wanna leave just yet…" Not for the first time, I feel like I make myself sound like an immature child; being difficult and whining. I hear Tsume approaching me from behind and I stiffen, thinking he's going to be firm with me and order me to get ready in his stern voice.
I gasp when I feel his warm arms embrace me from behind, and his half naked front press up against my back. I feel him rest his chin on the top of my head.
"Then we don't have to leave." My amber orbs blink in surprise. What did he just…Am I hearing things? "We'll stay here as long as you like, Toboe. We'll stay here forever, if that's what you want."
"Huh?" I try my best to look up at him but it's impossible to see his face from this position. "Are you serious, Tsume? Do you really mean that?"
"Tch. Did I stutter?" He answers in his usual clipped tone. Though in contrast to his rough tone, Tsume reaches up and strokes the back of his thumb over one of my collarbones tenderly. "Nobody else matters to me, Toboe. If you want to stay here then that's what we'll do. You're my mate now, Toboe. Wherever you go, I'll go too."
I feel a wave of emotion wash over me and my lower lip begins to tremble as my vision glasses over. "Oh, Tsume…" I softly turn myself around in his arms and peer up into his smoldering golden orbs. Tsume smiles tenderly and reaches up to brush an imaginary eyelash off of my cheek. I feel my lips gravitating towards his, he leans in down to my face, and as our lips connect I feel my soul knitting with his; intertwining our fates until the end of our days. His lips over mine seal an unspoken covenant to commit himself to me, and me to him. Just as he will follow me, so too will I follow him wherever he should go. Because…that is what it means to me mates.
"I love you, Tsume…" is my soft whisper against his lips. There is a long pause, to the point where I don't think he's going to answer me. But then it comes just as soft as the one I gave him.
"Yeah. I love you too."
The gang is already hanging around together by the time me and Tsume join them on the top of the tower, fully clothed and everything tucked back in the right place. I hadn't noticed it before when me and Tsume were enjoying our precious moment back there, but as soon as I started walking I became aware of a dull throbbing pain between my legs. When I expressed my concerns to Tsume, the male just smiled and said,
"You'll get used to it."
I can't tell if he means that it'll go away over time the more we do it, or if this pain will always be here after we…w-well you know. Either way I guess I'm fine…it's not as if it's that annoying.
It's seems as though we are just in time to celebrate the full moon with the others and haven't missed anything. As we crest the top of the hill I can see that there is a large and round depression in the ground further ahead. I guess at one point it might have been a large fountain, but the decline of this city has turned it into merely a big and flat hole in the ground. At least six inches of crystal clear rain water has collected in it and reflects the moon's glorious light like a giant mirror. I can see that Kiba and Hige are situated around the sides of the hole while Cheza wades around in it, twirling around with her skirts billowing out. The two males watch Cheza with faint smiles and the sound of the flower maiden laughing sends my heart aflutter.
I break away from Tsume and jog up to meet everyone. I know we haven't been separated for more than a day, but I can hardly contain my excitement at the idea of being all together with my friends again. Even better…being together with my friends, and with the man I love.
"Hey guys!" I call out and both Hige and Kiba turn to look at me. At first they both look generally pleased to see me, and wave. But as I get closer to them, it's as if they both get very uncomfortable. Well…at least Kiba looks a little bit uncomfortable. Hige as always is just…weird. Both males are fixed looking at me with the palate of their face hued a dark pink color. Kiba just stares blinking his crystalline blue orbs at me while it looks as if Hige is trying not to laugh. My mind sours with confusion.
Why are they both looking at me like that? I look down at myself and seeing that nothing is out of place my confusion only deepens. Do I have something on my face, or-?
"They can smell it on you." Tsume murmurs soft and low, having finally caught up to me.
My brow is still furrowed in puzzlement as Tsume walks by me. "What do you mean? They can smell what?"
Tsume stops and casts me a smirk over his shoulder.
"My scent all over you. They know what we did back there…" His golden orbs flicker down to my lower body and back up again. "They know that I've made you mine."
The blush makes its way to my face before my mind can fully gather what Tsume's said. What really brings it home for me is the way he smirks while he looks me up and down, and then steps out of my view to show me Hige and Kiba's mortified expressions. My amber eyes widen and I can actually feel my embarrassment making my throat close up.
"Ts-Tsume, y-you-! Big jerk!"
The steel grey male only chuckles at my frustration and my attempt to be offensive. Gggggr! My god! Just where does he get off-who does he think he is? I resist the urge to growl and stomp my foot like an indigent child and make my way over to our group, stomach and teeth clenched with anger.
As I join the group I'm about to open my mouth and give Tsume a piece of my mind when Cheza suddenly turns and looks at me with that dazzling smile of hers. Immediately I feel the ebb of my anger subside. She prances over to me through the water while holding out her hands for me to take. I reach out to her without giving it a second thought and smooth, slender fingers slide into my own.
"Toboe…" She says in her soft, sing song voice. "You are back…" She turns her blind crimson eyes over to my mate who is sitting on the fountain's edge not too far from us. "And Tsume too." She beams. "This one is glad. Now everyone can bask under the moon." She releases my hands and skips back to the center of the pool, her laughter like the peeling of a petite bell.
And just like that, my anger and my embarrassing situation are forgotten. I'll never understand how Cheza has the power to completely harmonize all feelings within us wolves, but at the moment I don't think it really matters. What matters is that we're all here, safe and sound in each other's company; enjoying the brilliance of the full moon with no monsters or nobles snapping at our heels. I smile in contentment as I take a seat next to Tsume on the fountain's edge. I'm here with my friends in the search for our utopia…my fingers close around Tsume's hand that rests on his lap and the male turns to me with a thoughtful look. But I think I've already found my paradise.
Mirth bubbles up in my belly and I powerless to stop a brilliant smile from breaking across my face. I give Tsume a playful but rough shove, sending him nearly toppling out of his seat.
"Hey!" He snarls, and I jump over the side of the fountain into the safety of the water with a splash. I laugh at his disgruntled attitude as I leap and bound over to join Cheza in playing in the water.
"Hey, wait for me!" Hige calls jumping in after us. He and I start to play a game of chase and I thrill with laughter as he nearly catches me again and again. Cheza giggles, watching the whole display with her blind eyes. Kiba jumps in too after that without a comment and jogs up to meet Cheza. After a moment of exchanging soft words with each other, the white wolf joins in on our game of chase.
"Aaaaah! Aha ha ha!" I shrill with laughter. Now there are two pursuers chasing after me. "Heh heh heh, c'mon guys! That's no fair!"
Suddenly I hear the two sets of feet splashing in the water stop chasing me, and I look back to see that the two silly males have abruptly abandoned our game of chase to play a game of fight. I chuckle under my breath and shake my head at them. What utter and complete goofballs. But then again, every wolf is like this on the night of the full moon. No matter how somber or reserved a wolf may be, when the full moon comes merry and cheerful is he. Speaking of which…
Comes a deep, husky voice from behind me, making me start a little. I turn around to see who my addressor is and I'm a little surprised to see that it's Tsume.
"Hunh? Tsume?" When did he get in here? I guess he must have climbed in here after everyone else did. But instead of having his usual mask of mild irritation Tsume is looking at me with his features fixed into a playful expression.
"You think you can just shove me like that and get away with it?"
Uh oh. I gulp. I'm not sure I like the way he said that to me. Tsume's got that same look in his eye like when he told me to run back in the city. Like when he told me he wanted to hunt me. I feel the natural response in my body: a shiver runs up my back that makes my hairs stand on end and my muscles tense, waiting to see whether I should fight or flight. Tsume leans forward, I feel the thread of my muscles being drawn tauter. I see a flicker of movement from Tsume and the thread snaps. I bolt it in the other direction and waste no time in casting my glance over my shoulder to see if he's actually chasing me. I can feel it in the pit of my stomach. I know without having to look that I'm being pursued. It's hard to distinguish Tsume's footsteps from all the splashing the others are causing. So I have no idea of how close or how far away he is from capturing me. I don't think I can afford to loop around on myself. If I have to turn I think the male will just cut me off and then surely he'll grab me. Oh! I wish I knew how close he was to me! But I can't stop to look either, because then I'm dead too! The ledge of the fountain is coming up. I have three options: I can jump over the edge and keep running indefinitely. I can take a chance to look behind me to see how close he is. Or, I could just say fuck it and turn with the wall and risk him cutting me off and intercepting me.
I choose the second option and spare just a quick glance over my shoulder-
But it's enough. A steel grey form glomps me from behind nearly knocking the wind out of me and I let out a startled cry as a pair of strong arms grab a hold of me.
"Got ya!" Tsume growls with content and lifts me clean off my feet to spin me around. A scream-like laugh escapes my lips and melts into a fit of giggles as Tsume swings me around.
It was right there at that moment, laughing with Tsume under the full moon and being held in his arms, that I knew. I knew that even if paradise wasn't real and if we never found it, even after searching to the ends of the earth to our dying days; I wouldn't care. Being here in Tsume's arms is the greatest happiness I've ever known. Whenever I'm with him I feel loved, and needed. I feel important, even when I'm at my lowest point and feel insignificant: I know I'll always mean the world to somebody else. This is what it means to have a mate by your side. From that moment I decided that wherever Tsume would go, I would go. Because he was my paradise.
- END -
Ugh, talk about the most difficult sex scene in the history of sex scenes to write. I spent so many hours writing this thing, rewriting it, then deleting the whole thing to start from scratch, to move things around and change the tone, to saying "screw it! I'm just gonna skip the whole thing!" to changing my mind. Seriously! It's been like over a year! I don't know why it was so hard for me to write this but I literally have never had such a problem with writing my smut before. I really don't know what it is. But I find that I can only make good progress with scenes like this when I'm in the mood in general and I also have to be in the mood for the pair I'm writing for…which doesn't happen often :/ So yeah, there's my whole schpeal on that.
Yay! Omg we're finally done! This is officially the longest story I've ever written. I honestly couldn't be prouder of it! Uuuh…but sorry if the 'scene' was long ._. I don't do rushy smex scenes. And sorry if some parts weren't as long as you'd liked, but just leave a comment and let me know what area you think I should/could improve on.
Alright guys here's where I get all mushy. I wanna thank all of you for sticking with this story: through the action-packed times and through the slow times; on my good weeks and bad months (months? More like years!); waiting through ungodly semesters just to get a couple chapters. I also wanna give a special thanks to Wolvenlights for helping me through with this last chapter and betaing for me :) And last but certainly not least: A deep and humble thank you to all who reviewed and kept me going. I couldn't have done it without you guys and your support. You believed in me in times where I didn't and…that really really helped a lot. Here's a few reviewers I'd just like to thank for your continued support:
Alright, and with that, I bid you good bye, lovelys 3
And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:
So this one is kind of relevant. Last night I had a dream that me and Kiba were besties and I was bored, so I texted Kiba and I was like 'You wanna hang out?' and he was like 'sure, I'm not doin anything.' So I walked down to his house which was on pine street in my town where a vacant lot is, only in my dream there was a house there that Kiba, Hige, and Tsume lived in. Now I guess apparently I was Toboe because it makes sense that me and Kiba were buddies and Toboe was the only one that I didn't see there. Soo, yeah, I guess I was Toboe? Anyway the house was dark wood and I liked it. So I went inside and all the guys were there and they were having a karaoke night. All except Tsume, obviously. He was like 'I'm not doin that shit.' And I was like aaaawww…sadness. But I figured that I would show off my swagger singing karaoke and impress him. And I did and then after I was done singing he came up to me and was like "Hey there baby ;)" And I was all like "Oh. Well hi there." Then my fucking mom came out of nowhere and totally killed the mood: She was all like "Oh hi, Jay. Who's your friend?" And I was like "Mom…you're killing my groove." Tsume introduced himself and my mom was like "Oh, so you're Jay's friend. Did she tell you about the time she peed her pants in second grade?" (tru story) And I was like "MOM!" Blushing like crazy. Honestly, whose mom just comes out of nowhere like that and totally cock blocks you by telling the 'apple of your eye' extremely embarrassing stories about you when you were little! You just don't do that! Then Tsume sneered at me and was like "I was wrong about you; You're frigging lame." And then walked away. I just looked at my mom and was like "Just…don't talk to me". Then Me, Hige, Kiba and Tsume went out four-wheeling and it was fun :).
And then I woke up to an ordinary day.