A/N: OK so DearSweetPapercut and I have spent a lot of time lately discussing this particular subject and after a rather long day of fic writing and conspiring this appeared. hope you like it and it makes you smile! drop me a review and let me know! Charli xx
Sara watched as Morgan retrieved a huge jar of peanut butter from the break room cupboard, insisting that dipping a banana in it was a good idea. Her rather colourful eating habits had become a discussion point around the lab now; she was almost getting as bad as Grissom with his chocolate grasshoppers.
"I have your results if you'd like them..." Hodge's voice shattered the small amount of peace they had created.
"Could this not wait until after lunch?" Greg rolled his eyes leaning back in his seat, glancing briefly at Morgan to his side fighting with the jar unsuccessfully.
"Well...unlike you slackers I don't get time for lunch breaks where I can lounge around" Hodges shot back sitting himself down in the empty seat beside Sara.
"What do you have? Just spit it out" Sara offered rushing the process of getting him to talk.
"I have sulphite..." He said with a Cheshire cat grin.
"Ah..." The brunette beside him glanced at the result print out taking a bite from her apple before handing the paper to Greg who was sitting opposite her.
"So...who did it?" Hodges asked with anticipation convinced his work would break the case.
"The butler" Greg replied in a dead-pan voice placing the paper on the table between them.
"There's a butler?" Morgan asked with raised eyebrows as she tried jamming a knife under the rim of the peanut butter jar.
"No...But it's always the butler..." The younger man shrugged taking the jar from her hands and attempting to remove the lid himself.
"It's always the wife isn't it?" Sara commented.
"I'm not sure... I've never liked Clue" Greg replied to her attempting to ignore Hodges.
"That's because I kick your ass at it Sanders..." Sara laughed noticing the way he was going red in the face with the strain of opening the jar "you need a hand there?"
With an eye roll he passed it grudgingly across the table
"If you open that it's only because I loosened it first" he remarked but Sara had about as much luck as anyone else had sliding the jar into the centre of the table with a defeated groan.
"You are approaching it all wrong guys. You tap it on the edge like this" Hodges pasted on his very best know-it-all expression and proceeded to tap the lid of the jar on the worktop as Vartann passed him and stood in front of the coffee machine.
"What's going on?" he queried as he waited on the machine issuing him his mug of sludge.
"Hodges is educating us on opening the unopenable peanut butter jar" Morgan declared with a defiant smile as she stood beside Hodges and folded her arms as he failed in his mission.
"Nice try he-man" she remarked as she snatched the jar from his hands.
"I'll have you know I've been put on arm rest by my doctor" he declared flexing his non-existent muscles "tennis injury… I've been missing my weekly work out"
Morgan sent him a rather unamused frown as she returned to poking the lid with a knife.
"I am never getting lunch!" she huffed, sliding the jar and knife across the worktop towards the wall.
"Give it here" Vartann declared with a soft smile, his striking blue eyes dancing with amusement.
Morgan slid onto the counter and watched as Vartann effortlessly wrapped his hand around the lid of the jar and twisted it open. With a smile he left the room with his coffee mug in his hands and Morgan looking after him in awe.
"He has huuuge hands" she grinned, directing her remark at Sara.
"Well you know what they say about big hands" Sara smiled, taking a sip of her coffee as the eyes of Greg and Hodges burned into her.
"Uhh what do they say about big hands?" Greg asked, his confused expression tickling Morgan as she took the seat beside him once again.
Sara cleared her throat a sly smile tugging at her lips as Greg met her gaze.
"Well...it's been said that the proportion of a man's hands is representative of other parts of his anatomy..." She explained her eyes not leaving Greg's.
A small smile flashed across his lips before disappearing as he also cleared his throat.
"I see..." He watched as Sara delicately raised an eyebrow at him, his eyes moving to Morgan who offered him a small nod and a knowing smile.
As if on cue Hodges held up his hands, analysing the length of his fingers carefully before remembering he had company.
"Well you know that was a mostly unproven theory…. Everyone knows that a man's… umm size… is to do with his exposure to testosterone in the womb" he stumbled over his words still holding his hand in mid-air.
"That's not true actually" Morgan grinned and shook her head at him. "There was a study in Japan recently that showed strong correlation between the two … and I heard you were up on Japanese culture too!"
"I wouldn't worry about it too much Hodges" Sara smiled "it's what you do with it that counts"
"I'm not worried… why would I be worried? I have ample sized hands" he made a point of waving his hands around in front of them. "And I'll have you know that above average has been used to describe me in more areas than intellect"
Morgan winced at his over share and placed her peanut butter smeared banana purposefully on the table.
"Suddenly not in the mood for a banana!" she sniffed with an eye roll.
"Most studies suggest that penis size is much lower down the list of priorities for women than a man's personality and grooming" Sara declared, glancing over at Greg who was studying his hand under the table.
"I choose to ignore such sexist comments anyway. I mean if we started saying that a woman's hand size was relative to her breast size we'd be run out of town" Hodges declared, taking a quick leave of absence as both Sara and Morgan glared at him.
"I resent that comment" Morgan declared, looking at her slender hands with distaste as she followed him out.
"You know it doesn't matter, right?" Sara asked carefully as they walked through the halls of the lab.
"Hey, I hope it's true" he grinned shooting her with his outstretched fingers and flashing her a cheeky smile and winking. "Big hands right?"