Disclaimer: I do not own DC characters or places
This came up in my mind and I just had to write a one-shot
Dick pulled up in the Wayne Manor's driveway. He turned off the car and and got out. He walked over to the front passenger's seat and opened the door. Kori gracefully took his hand as he helped her out of the car. They both had just gotten back from the doctors. Kori gave Dick a smile. She opened the door to the back and grabbed the baby carrier. She looked down at her sleeping baby, Mar'i. Dick closed the trunk to the car and held the baby bags in his hands. He wrapped a free arm around Kori and they both made their way into Wayne Manor.
Dick and Kori both sensed something was wrong the minute they stepped into the large house. One thing is that Alfred usually greets them when they arrive. Secondly, it was quiet. No sound of Bruce, Tim, Alfred, or Ace. Ace usually jumps on Dick and begs for a treat. Dick placed the bags down near the door and gave Kori a quizzical look.
"Perhaps they are on a mission?",asked Kori.
Dick shook his head. "I didn't see the bat signal. And Bruce would have called me if there was."
Kori sighed. "Perhaps we shall check the dining room? Is it not dinner time?" She readjusted her arm under the baby carrier.
Dick nodded. He wrapped his arm back around her waist as they made their way into the dining room. They both walked down the halls. The dark halls. The lights weren't on which is odd and the night sky made things harder to see. Dick searched for the light switch against the wall. Once he found it he flicked it on.
Dick looked around to see everyone there. Everyone meaning all his close superhero friends. He looked up at the hung sign which read 'Congratulations! It's a Girl!' He then spotted Bruce who was pouring himself a glass of Johnny Walker. "What's all this?"
"Alfred", was all Bruce said.
Alfred glared at Bruce. "Master Bruce decided to throw a surprise party."
"For what?",asked Dick. He looked at Bruce.
Alfred smiled. "For the new member of the family. How is the little one?"
Kori placed the baby carrier down and picked up a now crying Mar'i. "She is just startled that is all. You really did not need to do this."
"Yea", said Dick. He crossed his arms. "Your six months late anyways."
Alfred offered Dick a drink. "Oh we just wanted to give you some time to get used to parenting."
Wally placed a shoulder over Dick. "Yea. Besides, none of us actually believed you could be a father."
"You should watch him change a diaper", said Tim. He laughed. "I got his first time on video." He flipped open his phone.
Wally pushed Dick and rant to Tim along with most of everyone else. "No way dude."
"Play it", said Garfield. He leaned over Tim. "Make sure you send me a copy."
They all watched the video of Dick changing a diaper. It got quiet but all of a sudden you can hear a loud laugh coming from them all. "Man that is sweet", commented Vic.
Dick placed two hands on his hips. "Yea, yea. Laugh all you want. Don't come crying to me when you all need a lesson on changing a diaper when your time comes." He smirked at them.
"Dude", said Wally. "Kids are so overrated."
Artemis gave him a slight push. "Oh really?"
Wally rubbed the back of his neck. "It's not like we have to worry about kids any time soon. I mean...your not pregnant, right?"
Artemis smiled."Sure. I'm going to see the baby." She walked away leaving a nervous Wally. She sat on one of the couches in the dining room and smiled at Mar'i.
Rachel held the baby in her hands and talked to her. "Your a pretty baby."
"Is she a crier?",asked Diana.
Kori sighed. "I would be lying if I said no." All the females giggled. "Every time she wakes up crying in the middle of the night it is always a different situation. She is either hungry, she needs changing, she needs burping, or she cries just because." She rubbed her templed. "I have not gotten any healthy sleep in so long."
"You know if you guys ever need a babysitter, I'm so there", said Meagan. "One phone call away."
Kori smiled. "Thank you. But I do not know if I can go out and leave my baby at home."
Babs tilted her head. "Im sure Dick helps out."
"Is that a joke?",asked Artemis.
Kori nodded. "You would be surprised, Artemis. Dick love Mar'i and has grown very protective of her. The other night I was bathing Mar'i and he would sit next to me just to make sure nothing happens. He would ask me questions like 'Is that safe for her?'. 'Should you be using that much shampoo?"
Artemis chuckled. "I would have never thought."
"Aw", said Meagan. She touched her heart. "That's so sweet."
"I believe Mar'i likes him more as well", said Kori. "She would be crying in my arms and once I give her to Dick she would stop and smile."
"Well", said Rachel. "You know they say a girl's heart is warmer to her father."
"Daddy's little girl", cooed Diana. She placed a hand on Kori's shoulder. "Enough about Dick. Tell me more about Bruce."
Kori shrugged. "What do you wish to know?"
"Has he even held her yet?",asked Dinah.
Kori touched her chin. "Well...he", she stopped and thought for a moment. "Actually, I do not even know if he had held her at all." Kori made a mental note to ask Dick about it later.
"Typical Bruce", said Diana.
Alfred came up to the ladies and held out a tray. "Ladies, perhaps something to eat?"
Dick moved the movable crib closer to the king sized bed. He quickly made sure Mar'i was fast asleep before he carefully placed her in the crib. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead and walked over to the bathroom. He ran his fingers through his hair and moved his neck back and forth to crack it. He turned his sink on and held his toothbrush in his hand. He placed some toothpaste on it and started to brush.
Kori opened her eyes in the shower and noticed Dick in the bathroom. She washed out the shampoo foam out of her hair. She sighed then opened her eyes again. "Dick?", she called.
Dick moved his head back to look at her. "Huh?", he asked with foam in his mouth. He moved back to spit it out.
"I was thinking", she said.
"And?",asked Dick. He wiped his mouth with the towel. He kneeled against the counter.
"Well", said Kori. "The ladies and I were talking today and Diana mentioned something about Bruce which made me think." She turned off the water and stepped out of the shower.
Dick handed her towel which she gracefully took and wrapped around her. "What happened to Bruce?"
Kori wiped herself down and then wrapped the towel around her hair. She grabbed her nightclothes off the counter. She spoke to him as she dressed herself. "She asked me if Bruce has ever held Mar'i."
Dick watched as she placed each leg through her lacy pink underwear. He then watched her place a leg through her baby doll silk dress. Once she was finished with the straps she looked up at him. "Are you even listening?"
Dick looked at her face. "Huh? Yea. Um...what about Bruce?"
Kori scolded him. "I said Diana asked if Bruce has ever held Mar'i."
Dick shrugged. "I don't see the problem."
Kori shook her head and walked out of the bathroom. She walked over to the crib to find Mar'i in it. "Did we not decide to place her in her own room tonight?"
Dick pouted. "Yea but...I can't just leave her by herself."
"Dick. We have the baby talkie", said Kori. "Besides, she needs to get used to it sooner or later." She touched Mar'i's cheek and then made sure she was snuggled up.
"She's my baby girl", said Dick. He crawled into his bed side.
Kori walked over to her side and crawled in. "I am not complaining but why did I wear this outfit?"
Dick kissed her on the nose. "We can still...play."
"You still wish to wrestle with me?",asked Kori. She looked up at him with innocent eyes.
Dick nodded. "Why wouldn't I?"
Kori looked down. "You still find me attractive with all this baby fat?"
"Are you kidding?",asked Dick. "One of the very best joys of pregnancy is that I have these to play with." He placed his hands on her breasts.
Kori looked up at him and bit her lip. "Should we?"
Dick played with the bottom of her dress. "I don't see why we can't."
"We will wake Mar'i up", said Kori. She gave him a wink. "Do you really wish to hear crying?"
Dick sucked on her earlobe. "We can be very...quiet", he whispered.
Kori giggled. Dick grabbed her waist and placed her on her back. He settled on top of her and kissed her on the lips.
Bruce walked down the halls of the Wayne Manor. He had slicked his hair to the side and had put on a suit. Other than being Batman, Bruce Wayne has to make sure his company is well in shape. He held his suitcase in one had as he made a turn. He walked passed all the rooms and as he got closer to the halls he could hear a baby crying. He stopped to listen to it again. Mar'i. He kept on walking figuring Kori or Dick were already in there. He walked passed her room to see the door opened. He peered in and noticed no one was in there.
Bruce looked down both ends of the hallway. No sign of Dick or Kori. And no sign of Alfred or Tim. He walked into the room and placed his suitcase down on the pink couch. He walked over to the crib and peered down. Mar'i held her fists up as she cried. Her face was red and tears rolled down her cheek. Bruce picked up the baby talkie on the nightstand and held it against his mouth.
"Um...Dick or Kori", he said. He cleared his throat. "Your baby is crying. You might want to come and see her." Bruce waited a couple of minutes for someone to come but no one had showed up.
Mar'i's cries had pierced his ears and he was impatient. He attempted to leave the baby by itself but even Bruce Wayne couldn't have the heart to do that.
"Alfred!", he yelled loudly. "I need...help!"
He waited for a response from Alfred but no one came. Bruce growled and walked over to the white phone on the wall. He pressed the call to the kitchen. No answer. He checked the dining room. No answer. He checked the living room. No answer. Bruce had called every room in the house and still no answer.
Kori sat down on the computer chair in the bat cave. She heard the white phone ringing.
"Don't answer it", said Dick. He stood behind her as well as Alfred and Tim.
Kori looked at him nervously. "Are you sure this is safe?"
"Yea", said Tim. "Should we leave the baby alone with Bruce?"
Dick nodded. "I'm telling you this is brilliant. When I woke up this morning I thought about it for myself and realized he never held Mar'i. Bruce Wayne, the Dark Knight, is scared of a six month year old. Then this idea hit me." He looked at the screen which viewed Bruce in Mar'i's room. He was moving around.
"Okay", said Bruce. He took off his jacket. "I can do this." He looked around the room and spotted the baby bottle. "Hungry?" He looked down at Mar'i. "You must be hungry."
Bruce took the bottle and opened. "Water? No, idiot. She drinks milk." He walked over to the small fridge placed in the room and opened it. He looked for a milk carton but couldn't find any. "Great." He noticed white liquid in a small container. He picked it up and looked at it. "Please, tell me this isn't Kori's breast milk." He closed the fridge and walked over to the table. He placed the objects down and poured the milk in the bottle.
Bruce closed the bottle tightly and walked over to Mar'i. "Alright, now what?" Mar'i had stopped crying once she had seen the bottle in his hands. She rubbed her teary eyes and looked up at him curiously.
"Oh man!", laughed Tim. He held his stomach as he laughed some more.
Alfred let out a chuckle. "This is excellent practice for him in the future."
Kori grabbed Dick's hand. "At least she had stopped crying."
Tim draped an arm around Dick. "Bro, please, tell me your recording this."
Dick smirked. "What kind of a son would I be if I didn't?"
Bruce placed the nipple of the bottle in Mar'i's mouth and placed the end of the bottle on her chest. The bottle rolled off of her and Mar'i's lips started to quiver.
Bruce's eyes went wide. "Don't cry. Don't cry", he prayed. He grabbed the bottle and tried it again. Once again it slid off. Bruce let out a big sigh. "What the hell."
He placed the bottle on the table and then walked back to Mar'i. "I'm going to carry you", he told himself more than her. He awkwardly positioned his hands around her. He lifted Mar'i up and out of the crib. Mar'i's feet dangled as he stood feet away from her. Bruce awkwardly repositioned Mar'i. Her head rested against his arm. Bruce grabbed the bottle and walked over to the rocking chair. He sat down and then placed the bottle in her mouth.
By the time the bottle had finished he was rocking back and forth. Mar'i started to cough which startled him. He quickly sat up and tapped her back. "Burping!God. I almost forgot." He stood up and placed Mar'i's chin on his shoulder. He tapped her back and walked around the room. "Alright Bruce. You can do this. Kori and Dick will be back before you know it. Alfred is probably at the supermarket and Tim...well Tim is probably in his room doing God knows what. I swear that kid needs a censor."
"What does he think I do in my room?",asked Tim. He held his hands out.
Dick looked at him and raised an eyebrow. "What we all think you do."
Tim placed his hands on his hips. "What do you think I do?"
Dick shook his head. "Nothing."
"Please, Master Tim, no shouting", said Alfred. "Master Dick, do not tease him. Do you not remember yourself when you were his age watching those internet porn all night and-
"Hey!", yelled Dick. He looked down at Kori who just glared at him. "Let's change the subject."
"That's what you all think I do?",asked Tim.
Bruce heard a burp and smiled. "Finally. He placed Mar'i in front of him so that she could be with eye level. He walked over to the crib and placed her back down. "I did a good job, didn't I?" He stood in front of the butterfly mirror and smiled at himself. He then noticed something white on his black button up. He looked down and stomped his foot. "You've got to be kidding me!"
He walked back over to Mar'i. "Do you see what you've done? My best shirt." He grabbed a rag and tried to wipe it down. "If this stains I'm giving your father hell during training, missy."
"Dab don't wipe", said Alfred.
Kori looked down at her husband who was rolling on the floor laughing along with Tim. He clutched his stomach and closed his eyes. "Sometimes I feel like I married a five year old", she muttered.
"What was that, honey?",he asked.
Kori looked up at him and smiled. "Nothing, sweetheart." She pointed to the screen. "Look, Mar'i is starting to cry again."
"Oh for the love of God", said Bruce. He was halfway down the hall before he heard her again. He walked back into the nursery and leaned over the crib. He quickly backed off and pinched his nose. "It's stinging my eyes." He picked up Mar'i and pivoted over to the change table. He placed her down. Bruce looked around the room. He quickly ran into the bathroom and took out a pair of yellow gloves from under the sink. He walked back over to Mar'i and placed them on.
"Alright", he said. "I'm going to remove the diaper." He cracked his neck from side to side then placed his fingers on both sides of the diaper. He undid the diaper and opened it. He fell back onto the ground. He covered his mouth and begged for air. "What did I feed you?"
He looked to the side to see one of Mar'i's jackets draped over the rocking chair. He picked it up and tied the arms of the jacket behind his head. The rest of the jacket covered his mouth. He confidently walked back to Mar'i and quickly removed the diaper. He grabbed the wipes and while closing his eyes he wiped her down. He picked up the dirty diaper and dirty wipes and disposed them in the basket.
Bruce removed the jacket off his face. "There. I did a pretty good job, didn't I?", he asked. He looked down at Mar'i. Her lips curved into a smile and she escaped a giggle. Bruce smiled down at her. "Your pretty cute. Now let's put on a clean diaper." He took out a clean diaper and placed it on her. Once he was finished he picked Mar'i up and placed her on her feet. "Beautiful."
He brought her and himself over to the rocking chair. He sat down and rocked back, running a free hand on his face. "I'm beat." He felt a tug on his tie and looked down at Mar'i. Her tiny fingers played with the hem of his tie. She looked up at him. "You've got your mother's eyes." Bruce tried to take his tie out of Mar'i's hands but she crossed her eyes at him. He let her go and Mar'i made gurgling sounds. "You've defiantly got your father's stubbornness." He chuckled. "It feels just like yesterday he came into my life. Nine year old Dick Grayson." He looked down at Mar'i. "You know he used to jump from stair to stair. Just like the acrobat he is. That idiot actually thought he could jump three rooftops at the age of eleven."
Bruce tilted his head. "Promise me you won't turn out like him and act like a human being and not a monkey." Bruce mentally slapped himself. "Oh wait, your not going out. I don't even think I want you to grow up to be a super hero." He crossed his eyebrows. "Your not allowed to use your powers unless it's an emergency." He placed a finger on his chin. "Like if the opposite sex ever touches you I'm giving you permission to rip his head off. Then again I'll just cut off their balls." Bruce sighed and looked up. "I'm getting old." He closed his eyes. "Promise me when you grow up...don't forget about your grampa, no matter how old I get. And it won't hurt, ya know, if you visit my grave when I'm gone someday." He paused. He opened his eyes to tiny snores. He looked down at a sleeping Mar'i. Bruce smiled and lowered his head to kiss her forehead. "I love you Mar'i." He himself closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.
Dick wrapped his arms around Kori's waist and peered into the nursery. Kori looked at him and mouthed an 'aw'. Dick reached into the room and flicked the lights off. They closed the door then walked back to their own room.
"I told you it would work", said Dick.
Kori smiled and bounced on the bed. "Yes you did." She held her hand out.
Dick sat down next to her and took her feet. "What?"
"Give me the tape", she told him.
Dick chuckled and started to rube her feet. "Nah. I think I'll keep the tape."
"Oh, Dick do not be a pest", she told him. "Let it be your father's memory not everyone else's."
"Please, give me the tape?", she asked. She held her hands together an pouted. "Your wonderful wife begs of you."
"I don't think so", he said. "Besides, let's do something else."
Kori raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"
"Today got me thinking", he said. She urged him to go on. "And I've been thinking...what if we had another baby."
Kori looked at him. "This is a joke? We just had Mar'i."
"I know", he said. "But she's so cute. Let's have another one."
Kori shook her head. "Only if you give me the tape." She held her hand out.
Dick thought for a moment. He took out the tape and gave it to her. "Okay."
"Mhm. Besides let's just keep the memory for Bruce", he said. Kori smiled at him and pushed him back. 'Besides, it's not like I didn't make another copy.' He sheepishly laughed to himself.
Oh, Dick, your naughty! tsk tsk
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