AN: Okay, so here's my Fourth of July oneshot. This may be a bit crackish…just warning you.
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, and I am not making any money from this fanfiction.
I was going to make sure this holiday was one of the best for my new vampire family! I had bought sparklers and all of those little firecracker things. I had no idea what half of them did, but it had to be something exciting, right?
"Hey, Bella!" Emmett called as I came into view. "How's my favorite human doing?"
I shrugged my shoulders, holding my backpack with the sparklers behind my back. "You?"
"What are you hiding?" he asked, running around me and ripping the bag from my hands before I had the chance to answer. He took one look inside and then called everyone out.
Rosalie had a mirror in her hand and didn't seem to be interested in even looking at what Emmett was going on about. Everyone else just seemed shocked.
"Where did you get those, Emmett?" Edward asked, warily creeping forward to take the bag.
"I got these from Bella. My evil twin in everything involving sparklers," he responded, hugging the bag closer to his chest.
Oh no. What have I done?
"Bella!" Alice hissed, running to my side. "Emmett can't have sparklers!"
"Why not?" I asked innocently, pouting. It looked like my attempt to make this holiday great wasn't going to happen.
Alice stared at me blankly before turning me around. We watched as Emmett rolled around on the ground with the bag of sparklers in his hands. He was making loud kissing noises to it and growling when Edward tried to grab them from him. Alice then turned me back around. "You've seen Emmett without dangerous weapons, so what would ever give you the idea that letting him have them was a good thing to do?"
"I don't know," I answered, shrugging again. Now Emmett was probably going to cause a forest fire and it was all going to be my fault. Why did I even try to achieve more than I usual did? I should have just showed up and let them celebrate the way they thought was exciting. I should have tried to be as boring as possible. Now I have a sparkler deranged vampire on my hands. Great, just great.
I hurriedly tried to think of a way to correct my mistake. "Uh…it's not even the fourth yet, Emmett."
"WHAT!" everyone shouted, including Emmett.
"Uh, yeah. I was just bringing those over for tomorrow," I lied, hoping it sounded true.
Thankfully, Emmett seemed to believe it and handed me the sparklers. "Can you save these for tomorrow then?"
I smiled brightly and took them. "Of course, Emmett." Until I lost them in a truck accident that is.
I threw them into my truck with a clang, the red form shaking slightly from the impact. Good thing I loved my piece of crap car.
"So now what?" Jasper asked, his mask of pain never moving from his face. Poor guy. Maybe I should have got him a no smell pill or something. They make those, don't they?
Alice's eyes went blank, and then she exclaimed, "We go inside the house!"
"You needed a vision to predict that?" I asked, wondering why she couldn't just go into the house like a good non-complicated vampire.
She was certainly a stubborn vampire too.
When we walked into the house, Emmett was sobbing on Rosalie who was fluffing her hair as she stared at her hand held mirror, ignoring her crying husband.
"And it's not even the fourth until tomorrow!" he wept. Aw….he believed my lie. How could he possibly be so gullible? Oh well, it worked in my favor anyway.
"Yeah, uh huh," Rosalie snapped, pushing him off of her. "Now grow up, Emmett. You're not allowed to play with weapons anyway."
Emmett huffed, "Sparklers are not weapons. They are magical wands of fiiiireee."
"AKA weapons," Rosalie corrected, turning her attention back to her mirror.
I never should have bought those sparklers.
"Everyone upstairs now!" Carlisle ordered.
We—except for Emmett who remained on the floor crying—ran up the stairs to see what he wanted.
"I can't believe you bought sparklers, Bella," he reprimanded.
"Hey," I defended, holding my hands out in front of me, "no one ever told me Emmett wasn't allowed to use sparklers."
"We told you Emmett wasn't allowed to have weapons," Esme said form Carlisle's side.
"Yeah, but I never thought that sparklers could be considered weapons," I retorted. "At least not until ten minutes ago."
"Well now you know," Esme sighed.
It was starting to get dark, and we knew what would happen next.
"Fireworks!" Alice squealed, running outside with everyone on her heels. Well, I was a bit behind with my slow human speed, but you get my point.
"They're so pretty," I let out, leaning against a tree with Edward at my side as we watched the colorful explosions in the sky.
He smiled my favorite crooked smile. "Just like you," he responded, making me grin. He always knew what to say.
Then, interrupting our peaceful moment was a large BOOOOM!
"Oh crap," I muttered when I smelled the smoke and noticed that Emmett was nowhere to be found.
We ran back to the house, but this time I hitched a ride on Edward's back. What we saw made us all gasp in surprise.
"Happy Fourth of July!" Emmett screamed, waving his arms back and forth wildly.
"Oh no…" Esme trailed off, putting her hands on the side of her face in horror.
Okay, I definitely should not have bought the sparklers.
"YOU BLEW OUR HOUSE UP!" Alice screamed.
"I was celebrating the Fourth of July," Emmett told us, a frown appearing on his face once he realized we weren't enjoying the surprise as much as he was.
"We told you that is tomorrow," Jasper scolded, continuing the lie we had told the weapon crazy vampire.
"Yeah, but I figured in like China or somewhere it would be the fourth," he explained proudly, thinking he was amazing for figuring that out.
"Emmett, we are the only country that celebrates the Fourth of July."
If only I had known that the sparklers would explode the Cullen house when I bought them…well, I wouldn't have bought them.