Jack at the Museum

By Lorraine Anderson

There were sometimes that Jack wished he weren't in the thick of the action.

And then there were some days in which Jack wished he were.

This was one of those days.

Once again, he was trailing behind Daniel as he was wandering around a museum, this one in New York. He looked up at the dinosaur skeleton, and wondered if he weren't bored, standing in the same position all of the time. He reached up to touch its nose, then pulled his hand back. He didn't need to touch it to know that it was real.

Daniel was far ahead of him. He trotted – well, walked fast – to catch up, and his knee caught. He hadn't wanted to come with Daniel, but General Hammond had insisted, thinking maybe it had something to do with HomeWorld Security, and the apparent magic of the Ori, or perhaps the Goa'uld weren't quite as dead as they thought. He said something about strange things happening in the museum, according to an acquaintance of an acquaintance of the cleaning staff, or somesuch. And, since it held the obligatory Egyptian stuff, Daniel thought it was worth checking out to make sure that nothing was Goa'uld-ish – or Ori-ish, Jack supposed, although the Ori hadn't made it to Earth yet.

Which is why they were at the museum after hours. Jack had just gotten used to a regular night-time. Maybe there was someplace to curl up?

Personally, Jack thought it odd that the night guard hadn't said much of anything about strange things in the museum. He would've liked to interview the night guard, some joker named Daley, but the man was off tonight with a stomach bug, and Jack really didn't want to even call somebody who was puking. So in the meantime, Jack was stuck following Daniel and some high-faluting pansy named McPhee.

"This," McPhee announced with a flourish, pointing down a hall, "is the tomb of Ahkmenrah."

Jack looked around. Big stone Jackal guys guarded the tomb, which was, apparently, made of glass. "I didn't know they had Plexiglas in ancient Egypt," he said.

Daniel shook his head slightly at him.

"Obviously," McPhee said. "They didn't."

"Ahkmenrah," Daniel said to Jack, "was a minor pharaoh in Egypt. He was rather young when he died, and the theory was that he was murdered by his older brother Kahmunrah, but nothing was ever proven. Kahmunrah was passed over by his father in favor of Ahkmenrah, apparently because of mental problems. Which was rather odd, because most Pharaohs named their older son, regardless."

"We think that Ahkmenrah was killed by an infection," McPhee said. "Certainly no tests have been conclusive. His reign was taken up by his oldest son, who was all of five. Ahkmenrah's wife was regent."

Jack raised his eyebrows. Personally, he could think of a couple of different ways that Ahkmenrah could have been killed without any conclusive evidence. But that depended on whether he had Goa'uld contact.

"The important thing is that all these personages were pre-dynastic," Daniel said, "which makes them extremely important to my… research."

McPhee looked at him down his nose. "Not to insult you, Dr. Jackson, but I heard your research was discredited some time ago. And you haven't published a paper since."

Daniel blushed.

"Dr. Jackson," Jack said, "has since been doing top secret research for the military."

McPhee raised his eyebrows and opened his mouth.

"Which," Jack said forcefully, "is top secret. And I don't believe you have a security clearance."

McPhee sighed, and looked curiously at Daniel, then shut his mouth.

"I've heard," Daniel said, "that things happen around here."

McPhee sniffed. "I wouldn't know where you've heard that."

"The news last year? The dinosaur tracks in Central Park? The cavemen on the roof?"

McPhee looked at the ceiling. "Those were not sanctioned museum activities. The police finally concluded that the stunts were pulled off by vandals to cover up the theft of valuable antiques by our previous three night guards."

"Three?" Jack said.

"They were all elderly and not needed with our new security measures. It was an economic move to hire one younger man."

Jack gulped a little. He supposed he was lucky that he could be kicked up to General rather than put out to pasture like those three. He didn't condone what they had done, but he could sympathize with their frustration.

Daniel glanced at him. "So, can we stay here after-hours so that I can study the tablets?"

McPhee glanced at Jack. "It seems I don't have much choice. I've had orders from higher than you to let you do what you wish."

Jack smiled. "I'll try to keep him from touching the exhibits. Bad things happen when he touches things."


"Sorry, couldn't resist." He waited a beat. "But it's true."

McPhee looked at the banter, looked like he wanted to comment, then said, "Just find our temporary night guard when you want to leave. He should be in the atrium, but most of them seem to end up in the guard office." He sighed heavily. "I suppose we should consider ourselves lucky that our exhibits are mostly intact."

Jack raised his eyebrows again, and he and Daniel looked at each other. "Mostly?" Jack said.

"I'll leave you to your work."

"Yes," Jack said. "Our work." They watched McPhee leave, and he nodded at Daniel. "Our work."

"Going to find a nice bench someplace?"

Jack raised his finger. "You know me so well." He left Daniel, who was already engrossed in the walls, and wandered around until he found the miniature exhibit. There was a bench, so he laid down. A little hard, but he'd been on worse. He closed his eyes….

"Hey. You!"

A tiny voice was shouting at him.

"What?" he said, his eyes still closed.

"Large one, we've let you sleep, but we need your help." A different voice, a bit more cultured.

"Who're you calling large?"

"You, you big jolly blue Union soldier."

Jack wrinkled his nose, his eyes still closed. "Huh?"

"Open your eyes."

He opened his eyes. Two tiny men were looking down at him from the top of the bench.

He sat up suddenly, grabbing the top of the bench, causing the two little men to stumble backwards. "Whoa, cowboy," the one that looked like a cowboy said.

"Ok. I'm dreaming."

The two men looked at each other. "Yes. You are dreaming." The Roman soldier said.

"But while you're dreaming, can you help us?" the cowboy said.

"I… suppose I can." This was one heck of a vivid dream, but Jack refused to believe that he was awake.

"All right," the cowboy said. "I'm Jedediah, and this is my good friend, Octavius. We would shake your hand, but I'm terribly fond of my hand."

"And how can I help?"

"Well, Gigantor isn't here tonight, and we have an intruder in the museum."

Jack smiled. "Who, Daniel? He's not an intruder. We have permission."

"That big goofball down by Ahkmenrah's place? Naw, not him."

"This is one of the former night guards," Octavius said. "We think he's back to pick up some of the stuff he had to dump last time."

"I thought they caught those guys."

"We caught those guys."

"Larry said the three were set free on what he called a 'technicality,'" Octavius said.

"Ah." Jack sat back. This was a bit more complicated than the dreams he usually had. "What do you want me to do?"

"We wish you to detain the scoundrel, my boy," came a new voice. A big voice. Jack looked up.

"Of course," he said. "Teddy Roosevelt." He stood up. "It's been a long time since somebody called me a boy, Mr. President."

Roosevelt cocked his head. "A figure of speech, son, a figure of speech."

"Where is the intruder?" He looked around. "As far as that goes, why don't you catch him yourselves?"

Roosevelt looked pained. "The intruder is under Sacagawea's surveillance. And we can't catch him ourselves, technically, because we're not real."

"We can't be named as witnesses!" Jedediah said.

Jack looked Roosevelt up and down, then looked at the two little men on the seat, then at the little people walking up to him on the floor. He wrinkled his eyebrows. "You may be a dream, but you look real to me."

Roosevelt glanced at Jedediah. "Thinks he's sleeping," Jedediah said.

"You are not sleeping."

"That's what all my dreams say," Jack said. "And a few of my nightmares. I've seen some you wouldn't believe. Space aliens. Nasty ones."

"Whatever you wish… What is your name?"
"General Jack O'Neill."

Roosevelt looked surprised. "Ah. A General. I've known a few in my time."
"Yes. You have."

"Do you have a gun?"

"In a museum?"

Roosevelt looked at him.

"Yes… I have a gun." Jack looked down. "As I said, some of my nightmares…"

"Well, even though you think you're dreaming, I will tell you why we can't be named as witness. Most of us are made of wax, brought to life by the tablet of Ahkmenrah."

"Sure. Wax."

Teddy Roosevelt inclined his head.

"Of course."

"Ahkmenrah is a mummy by day, but human by night, and Christopher Columbus is actually made of metal, but since he speaks Italian, he would hardly be suitable."


Teddy looked at Jack. Jack looked at Teddy.

"So, like I said, where is this guy?"

"The basement. He seems to be going through the Egyptian antiquities."

"If he's going through the Egyptian stuff, I should get Daniel."

"No!" Jedediah said. "The less who know about us, the better."

"You coming?"

"You got a pocket? And nothing near your crotch. That's disgusting."

Jack looked down at the little men. "I agree in more ways than one." He picked them up and put them in the pocket of his suit. "Lead on."

"Come with me," Teddy said. He went back into the main hall, looked left and right, then proceeded down the hall. Jack passed a lion, three civil war dummies, a few people in Victorian clothing, and almost pulled his gun when a man in Egyptian dress came up to them.

"Hello," said the man, extending his hand. "I'm Ahkmenrah." His voice was cultured.

"I'm… Jack." He looked at Teddy.

"Are you with that man that's studying my tablets?"

"Yeah." Jack felt alarmed. "He is fine, right?"

"He never saw me. I walked out behind him." Ahkmenrah shrugged. "He concentrates well."

Jack relaxed. "He does, at that. In fact, I'm sure he'd love to talk to you about your… Gods."

Ahkmenrah tensed up. "What about my Gods?"

"Did you know any? Personally?"

Roosevelt looked at the two. "Have you both gone daft, man? How would he know his Gods?"

Ahkmenrah glanced at him. "I dared to defy my Lord Ra about my people. He killed me with a device that he wore on his hand. After that, just flashes, until I woke up one night in a museum."

"Yeah, about that."

"My tablet has magical properties to bring inanimate objects to life."

"It's not from your… God?"


Roosevelt tugged on Jack's arm. "We can talk about this later. Cecil may be getting away."


"He's back in the museum."

"Oh, dear."

"That's what I said," Jack's pocket yelled.

Whatever Jack expected a former mummy – or a current mummy to say – "Oh dear" was the last thing he expected. He shook his head. "We should get going."

"That is what I've been saying," said Roosevelt under his breath. He strode onwards down the hall, not looking to see if anyone was following. He descended to the bottom floor.

Jack noted that the dinosaur skeleton was gone, then saw it in a corner, wagging it's tail as if it were a dog. "This is one hell of a weird dream."

Ahkmenrah glanced at him and frowned, but didn't say anything.

Roosevelt stopped and pointed at a door that said "Employees only." Walking forward slowly, he opened the door and held his finger in front of his mouth. A woman in American Native dress was crouched at the top of the stairs. She looked up and pointed down an aisle. "Sacagawea, I presume," Jack whispered.

She smiled at the correct pronunciation of her name. He crouched down beside her. Just in sight was an elderly man, his back to the stairs. He was going through boxes. Cracked pottery was on the floor. He seemed to straighten up, pulled out a gold looking bracelet, then slipped it on his hand. Next to Jack, Ahkmenrah gasped.

The man whirled and stared at the group on the stairs. Jack noticed two things: 1) the man looked like Dick Van Dyke, and 2) his eyes flashed as he raised his hand. He pushed back so violently that the group ended up falling on the floor. Getting up rapidly, he slammed the door closed, then winced as the door rattled violently.

"Cecil… is a god," Ahkmenrah whispered.

"No," Jack said, as he hustled the group down the hall. "That was no God. That was a Goa'uld."

Jack received puzzled looks, and one of the figures in his pocket yelled, "I ain't ever seen Cecil do something like that."

"Neither have I," said the other.

"We have to get you to safety," Jack muttered.

Roosevelt stopped. "General, man, we have to get you to safety. What is he going to do to us? You're the one who's alive around here."

"Besides Daniel."

"Besides him."

"You could get melted."

Roosevelt shrugged. "I've been wanting a little excitement." Sacagawea glared at him. "Not that you aren't exciting enough, my dear."

"Wax dummy love?" Sacagawea looked like she were blushing.

They were passing by a large statue that looked like it could come from Easter Island. "No, you dum-dum."

Jack paused. "Did you say something?"

"You have gum-gum, dum-dum?"

"Ignore him," Roosevelt said. "He's mostly noise."

Jack decided that taking the dead president's advice was the best advice he'd had all day. He had to be dreaming. "Does anybody see Dick?"


Jack shook his head. "I meant Cecil."

"Not yet."

"Let's go get Daniel."

"Sound advice," Roosevelt said. "We need to protect the two live people in the museum." He started walking towards Ahkmenrah's tomb.

"What about 'the less who know about us, the better?" Jedediah yelled

This was one hell of a dream. "No," Jack said. "We need to protect you. I'm military, and we know what we're facing. You're not just facing an elderly man."

"You said he was a Goa'uld," Ahkmenrah said. "I saw Ra's eyes flash like that, and he was our God – and my father."

"We killed Ra. He was no god," Jack said. "He was a human controlled by a space alien." He recoiled. "Your father?"

"I've heard of space aliens. I thought they were fiction," Ahkmenrah said. "And did you not know that Pharaohs are descended from the Gods?"

"Daniel said something, yes. But I never…" He shook his head again. "Space aliens are not fiction."

"Larry never mentioned this!" Jedediah yelled.

"This is top-secret. Larry wouldn't have known of this. And you should not tell Larry."

Roosevelt looked serious. "We shall not."

He stopped at the door. The Jackal heads looked down at the group. Ahkmenrah made a stopping motion, and the Jackal heads straightened up.

Jack walked into the tomb. Daniel was still studying the tablets along the walls. "Daniel."

"Jack," he said abstractly. "This is fascinating! I knew that Ahkmenrah was pre-dynastic, but I didn't realize there was ancient writing on this wall! This suggests that Ahkmenrah actually knew Ra!" He straightened up painfull.

"I know, Daniel," Jack said.

"You…" Daniel looked up, blinked, shook his head, and looked up again. "Jack."


"Why are you being followed by an Egyptian, an American Native, and Teddy Roosevelt?"

"Don't forget about us!" Two little head poked out of Jack's pocket.

"And you have a cowboy and a Roman in your pocket." Daniel shook his head. "Ok, trying to find Merlin has made me crazy."

"Actually, I'm dreaming."

"Okay. I'm crazy and you're dreaming." Daniel stood up and extended his hand. "It's nice to meet you, Mr. President."

Roosevelt took Daniel's hand, shook it, then looked up at the Jackal headed statues. "Actually, I suggest we retreat further into the tomb. Can your servants protect us?"


"Yes. Of course," Ahkmenrah said. "After you."

"We're being followed by a Goa'uld who looks like Dick Van Dyke."

"Of course we are," Daniel blinked.

"And this would be Ahkmenrah," Jack said. "Son of Ra and killed by Ra."

"Nice to meet you. Can I ask where you learned…"

"… English? On display at Cambridge."

"Of course," Daniel blinked.

They moved to the back of the room, and the two Jackal heads knelt in front of the door.

"By the way, Dick…"

"Cecil," Roosevelt interrupted.

"… seems to have discovered a hand device in the basement."


"Cecil is the man's name. He's one of the former night guards," Jedediah said.

Suddenly, a man appeared at the entrance. His eyes flashed, and he raised his hand. "Duck!"

The Jackal guards thrust their spears forward, and Cecil danced back. He peered in. "Ahkmenrah. Son of Ra!" his voice echoed. "I know you."

"Cecil. I know you," Ahkmenrah said.

"Cecil is no more," the man said.

Jack snorted. "That's what they all say."

"Then what is your name?"

"I am Shu."

"Shoe?" Jack said.

"Shu," Daniel said. "God of the sky."

"I have escaped from Ra's treachery, and shall have my revenge."

"On Ra?" Daniel said. "Killed a few years back."

The man stared. "You lie."

"The rest of the System Lords?" Jack said. "Mostly gone. Apophis, Hathor, Yu, Nirrti – gone."

Shu laughed. "Then I shall take over."

"Goa'uld," Jack said. "Overwhelming egos, small brains."

"You're one person with a ribbon device."

"You shall bow down before me."

"I don't think so," Daniel said. He pulled a Zat'ni'ko'tel out of his pocket and shot at Shu…

… who avoided the shot with a growl and ran away.

Daniel looked at the gun. "I'm usually a better shot than that."

"You brought a Zat along to a museum?"

Daniel shrugged. "You have your gun."

"You realize that we can't let him get on the street."

"Let us handle that," Roosevelt said. He strode out into the hallway. "Easter island head," he shouted. "Call the 'at arms'."

A large bellow echoed through the museum. Daniel clapped his hands over his ears. Roosevelt beckoned the group out and to the atrium.

The atrium filled. Jack looked around. If he didn't know he was dreaming, he knew it now. Beside him, Daniel kept making funny noises. "This is not a dream. This is not a dream."

"It is. It must be."

"Are your dreams this imaginative?"

Jack paused. "Sometimes."

A metal statue stopped before him, looked at Jack, and asked a question. Daniel replied in the same language. The statue smiled, made a non-committal remark, and moved to the edge of the atrium.

"What did he say?"

"He asked if you were as dumb as you looked." Said Daniel abstractly.

"You said no, right?"

Daniel backed up when the Tyrannosaur walked in.


"Pardon me, General." Roosevelt moved to the dinosaur's platform and stepped up on it. "Cecil is back in the museum."

A murmur of consternation rose.

"However, he shall not make it out of the museum, thanks to our good friend here."

A Capuchin monkey held up a set of keys."

"I am told that he is possessed by a supernatural entity." He winked at Jack when Jack opened his mouth to object to the term, then went on. "He is far more dangerous than last time. Larry is not here tonight, and we cannot expect any help from his substitute. However, these gentlemen are invaluable aids. They will remove Cecil from our home." He paused. "Let's find Cecil."

The exhibits scattered.

"How did he get into the museum in the first place? Weren't the employees looking out for him?" Jack asked. At Daniel's questioning look, he said. "He stole from the museum."

"We've had an influx of new employees, Larry said,"Roosevelt said.

Sacagawea looked down, then pointed down a hall. Roosevelt strode down the hall, then looked back at Jack and Daniel. "Come on, men."

Jack and Daniel followed. "Why are we going this way?" Jack asked.

"Sacagawea was a tracker," Daniel said abstractly, looking at the Civil War Uniform dummies passing by.

"What's she tracking… dust?"

Daniel shrugged.

She pointed again. "He's up there."

Jack looked up to the second floor. "I don't…" He saw a silver head. "Oh." He reached for Daniel's Zat. Daniel gave it up without a comment.

And hesitated.

"What's the matter?" Daniel said.

"I'm zatting Dick Van Dyke. I can't zat Dick Van Dyke!"

"That's not Dick Van Dyke. That's Shu."

"He still looks like Dick Van Dyke."

"Oh, for Pete's sake." Daniel grabbed the zat from Jack, took aim, and shot Cecil. He collapsed with a groan. "Somebody up there, tie him up."

A faceless Civil War soldier showed his face over the railing and gave him the thumbs up.

"Why am I not reassured?" Daniel wondered.

When they made it up there, they found Christopher Columbus had somehow torn a strip from his cloak and had tied it loosely around Cecil's hands. As soon as Columbus let go of the strip, it turned back into metal, securely holding the man's hands behind his back.

"Ah," Jack said.

Shu looked up at them with hate. "You should not trifle with your God."

Jack snorted. "Daniel, how long has this guy been corked in a jar?"

"Oh, maybe three thousand years or more."

"And it just seems like yesterday, huh?"

Cecil looked up at Ahkmenrah and spoke – in Egyptian, Jack supposed. Daniel raised his eyebrows and put his hand on his mouth. Ahkmenrah looked angry, then smiled and spoke in English. "Ra may have been my genetic father, but Menrah was my true father. Even though I'm dead, I have risen above my heritage."

"Don't try to explain anything to him," Jack said "He's a snakehead."

Ahkmenrah looked confused.

Daniel reached down to remove the hand device. It suddenly lighted and threw him across the hall. Startled, Columbus reached down to restrain him. Jack held his arm, and was startled to feel how… cold and flexible and still metallic feeling he felt. This was still one hell of a dream, he thought. With a sudden move, he divested Shu of the hand device and let it dangle from his hand.

"Didn't I tell you, Daniel," Jack said. "To always take the enemy's weapons quickly?"

Daniel was shaking his head. "Yeah, well, this didn't feel quite real—until now."

Jack looked around at the assemblage. "And this seems real – now?"

"Yeah, well." Daniel got out his cell phone. "We need to call Stargate Command.

"You do it." He looked at his watch. It was four-thirty in the morning. Time flies when you're having fun. "Isn't it the middle of the night there?"

Daniel was speaking into the phone. "Walter. What are you doing up – yeah. Well, we have a situation here. Yeah, at the museum. We need an escort to take a Goa'uld to the SGC. Yeah, I said a Goa'uld. Shu. Seems he's been in a canopic jar all these years. Yeah, alert the Tok'ra that we'll need an extraction. Oh, General. You're there!"

Roosevelt looked at Jack. "Is that something like an exorcism?"

"Duller. Much duller."

"Ah." He looked at the crowd still milling around the museum. "Easter Island Head," he called. "Give the all clear and the dawn call."

The large voice echoed through the museum. "ALL DONE. DAWN COME, DUM DUM."

Roosevelt shrugged at the announcement. "Crude, he said to Jack, :but effective."

"Don't ask," Daniel said into the phone. "Yes, positive confirmation of a Goa'uld. I'm sorry, General. That we woke you up. Oh, ok. Yes, we have it under control, so to speak. We'll wait until the special unit comes. Thank you, sir." He closed the phone. "They should be here in an hour."

"Which means," said Ahkmenrah," that I should get back to my exhibit."

"Yeah," Daniel said. "Hey, can we talk some other night? If I can make it back?"

"I would like that. I would like to find out more about Ra's demise." He shook Daniel's hand, then turned to Jack. "Thank you."

"Just doing our job. Which is top-secret, by the way. No talking about this to 'real' people."

"Understood," he smiled. "I will do this out of gratitude to the people who slew Ra." He disappeared down the hall.

"Classy guy," Jack said.

"Some Pharaohs were," Daniel said abstractly, looking as Ahkmenrah disappeared.

"So what are we going to do in the meantime," Jack said. "Tiddley-winks?"

"You could get us out of your pocket," a small voice yelled, "and get us back to the Diorama room."

"With our thanks, my Liege… um, General."

"Call me Jack."

"Jack." The Centurion looked a little uncomfortable with the name. "You Americans are more informal than I like."

"Oh, c'mon," Jedediah said. "You were made in China, like I was!"

They argued all the way back to the diorama room. Jack watched all of the small men get back into position, shouting at each other good-naturedly, then walked back to the atrium. They walked Cecil down to the first floor, objecting all of the way.

Jack raised the zat. "Quiet… or I won't quite kill you."

"You're going to kill me anyway."

Jack smiled.

Daniel's cell phone rang. "Yeah?" He looked around. "Just a second." He held the phone and made a clearing gesture. The atrium was almost empty, and the rest of the exhibits disappeared as he watched. Roosevelt got up on this horse and pulled his sword. "Yeah, we're clear. Northing around but some was dummies." Roosevelt smiled, then exclaimed as a beam of light revealed a foursome of Air Force Guards. He rapidly schooled his expression as one of the officers looked around. "Yeah, they're here," Daniel said. "Thanks."

"Prometheus was free?" Jack asked.

"Yes, sir," the ranking officer said. "Collins, sir. Is this the Goa'uld?"

"The Goa'uld's name is Shu," Daniel said rapidly, almost before Jack opened his mouth. "The host's name is Cecil. I'm sorry, I never did get a last name."

"He looks like…" one of the other guards said."

"Don't say it," Daniel said. "Please don't say it."

The guard shut his mouth with a snap.

Behind the guards, the Tyrannosaurus Rex got onto his podium and moved into position.

Another guard looked to his side. "I thought I saw the dinosaur…"

"The museum is trying out some Audio-animatronics," Daniel said swiftly.

"Which would make it a Disno-saur," Jack said.

Daniel glanced at him.

"What's Shu tied with?" Collins said." That looks like metal."

"I should tell them what you've actually been doing in this museum," Shu said, more slyly than Jack expected. Or was that Cecil talking? "The exhibits come to life around here. A tablet in Ahkmenrah's tomb…"

Jack grinned. "Audio-animatronics," Jack told the guards. "He's been in a jar for 3000 years, for God's sake."

The guards grinned at each other. "Crazier then most of them?" Collins said.

"Oh, yeah." Jack looked Cecil in the eye, daring him to say anything. Shu dropped his eyes with a resentful look.

"And don't ask what he's tied up with," Jack said. "That's an official order."

"Yes, sir," Collins said. He punched a button on his communications device. "With your leave, sir?" Jack made a dismissive gesture. "We're ready to beam up. His eyes widened as he caught Roosevelt turning his head to look, then he disappeared in a column of light.

Jack looked up at Roosevelt. "And that is also top secret, Mr. President."

Roosevelt smiled. "Or you'll have me removed from the museum, ensuring my silence?"

"I trust your discretion."

Roosevelt smiled again, and then his face straightened as the sunlight hit him. His skin turned waxy.

"Wow," Daniel said. He turned to Jack. "Do you still believe you're dreaming?"

"What else could explain…" He stopped as he caught a movement from his right. A man in a blue uniform walked up, yawning, then stared at the two.

"Who are you?"

"You must be the temporary night guard," Daniel said. "We were let in last night be Mr. McPhee. I've been studying the Egyptian exhibit all night." The man looked absent. "McPhee? Your boss? Where were you all night?"

The man blushed. "Please, don't tell him. I fell asleep. I was working another job yesterday. Northing happened, did it?"

"No," Jack said. "Nothing at all."

"Excuse me," he said. "I should make some rounds."

As he disappeared, Daniel said, "Nothing at all?" He pinched Jack's arm.

"Ouch!" Jack rubbed at the spot.

"Nothing at all?"

"Well, if I felt that, then…" He looked up at Roosevelt. "You have to be kidding."

"Want to play night guard tonight?" Daniel said. "I bet I can convince McPhee to let us back in – or you can."

Jack looked up at Roosevelt. He smiled…


"So what did you guys do while I was gone?" said Larry, the regular night guard.

"Nothing at all, dear boy," Roosevelt said. "Nothing at all." He looked at Ahkmenrah and smiled.

Ahkmenrah looked at Larry and smiled. "Well, I did find overhear how my father died…"

"Really? How?"

"Did I ever tell you that my biological father was a God?"

Larry narrowed his eyes, looking as if he thought he was being scammed. "No. Really?"

"Well, it seems that somebody more powerful than he arose…"