File Reading ….

The start of a new life, a boy born from sadness and regret, growing up slowly along his years, experiencing things only a few people in this world had seen. The boy who was left behind in lost memories…..

Age 4 - 10 – Nightmares of death

Fast asleep in my warm bed as rain hit the window constantly, the sound of thunder crashing through the sky. Dreaming of darkness that engulfs the world as no one is in sight I cannot move or speak just watch as darkness takes over my mind. This dream occurring over and over until my fatal date with death, my family continually finding a way to stay in a stable home, where we can expand and be in peace, I slowly hear the voices of those who are sad and depressed, such a pity although in my mind I was sad at how this was this age I haven't known yet what life was about until my nightmares became forming representing my memories. Each day I pray as I got to church on Sunday, trying to reach out for help as it only gets worse as the nightmares turning bloody slowly. Each night I wake up sweating as the heat goes to my head I see shadowy figures in my eyes, why are they playing tricks on me, I hear the moaning of those figures as my ears begin hearing their fainted voices, "why is this happening" I think to myself. I continually rely on god to tell me the answer but received no answer. Few days later I sleep in my bed at a specific time of 5:00 pm I wanted to avoid the darkness before it reaches me, wrong as I was, as I slowly entered another part of a dream but this time I didn't die. I somehow avoided death because of a light in the other side of my dream, "run away from him" it said, as I just stared at the shadowy figure with the black cloak and dark hood, as he came closer I saw the scythe he was holding with 3 holes in the back of it and the stained blood all over it I jumped to the light figure hoping it would catch me. I was almost there until the shadowy figure grabbed my leg and caused me to miss the light figure and fall back into the darkness of the beginning. I cried in my bed sad that I won't find happiness in my dreams anymore. Days after the dream life got worse along with it. People I loved begin dying, the nightmares beginning to turn into reality and the people I once knew began to change. I began making friends in elementary school fun as it was but I was only experiencing a bit of it. Friends I knew were helpful in keeping me happy and far away from darkness. Glad as I was it still never ended. Some friends began using me for their own benefit. If I do anything to them they use it against me and force me to do what they say my life was worse than I thought as I began sitting in shame in the corner. I see the shadowy figure stalking me slowly making nightmares reality, I see his words on the wall with red marking "tadata" it said as that's what it said in my dream. "How can this be happening" I thought I erased the marking as I ran to my room closing the door and covered myself in a blanket in fear. The dream of dying by him dying over and over by the dam figure I couldn't take it and went into a phase of where I can't accept anything.

Age 10 – 13 - Fake friends and foes

Ignoring the nightmares of death as I go along, I move to a new home where there are schools with no threats no bullies, A fool I was thinking to believe that as they were worse. My first middle school, shy as I always was I never spoke unless spoken to I met 10 friends in that school. Happy as I was they trusted me as I trusted them. Although… one of those friends were out for me and were faking just to get to me, one of them a polish boy criticized me highly and always wanted everything to go his way. His stupidity was highly not tolerated in school. I don't even know how he even got in school…money raffle? The question remains. Another boy Adam, another friend, he wasn't as fake as I thought but at least this one didn't criticized me we both had fun times until his other friend got jealous a bully who wants everything his way as well he convinced Adam that I was the one who was jealous of their friendship and told him that I was just using him for my own benefit, as shocked as I was my mind cracked my heart cracked slightly as I gave up on friends like those, I was forgotten in my school like a student with no record a low life that everyone hates, but then I was founded by 8 other friends who took me in and were also people who were forgotten all 8 of us had fun together the best one of all Michael telesford my best friend that followed me as I followed him we both helped each other when we were depressed and were best friends for 4 years. Although when graduation came Michael was depressed that his girlfriend won't be able to go with him to high school because of different choices. I helped Michael through this as it didn't work, Michael lost his heart and couldn't love as much as he did, but over the months he chose to forget about it and move on even though his heart was still faint. Love is a strange emotion that humans have we have it with us always Michael lost his by far my heart shattered with my emotion, before I had a girl friend who was similar to me although we lost connection with each other and broke up as we were not affected, my second girlfriend was sweet but only used me for what I had. My final girlfriend was just like me we both hated the world and how its people pained us through life but she was the worst she had another boyfriend I was a bit affected by the situation as I knew what would happen but in the end she chose him over me because he didn't want her to date me by then my love and happiness shattered like fallen glass as I lost it forever. as we moved on to high school Michael and I experienced more pain the harsh words from bullies the pain from the torture, by them Michael went insane his other self - consumed him in rage and sanity. As his friend I sealed that side from happening and helped him through it even though my problem was slightly more painful. We both met 9 new friends at high school because are other friends forgot about us and moved on with their lived. These 9 friends were like us in a way, 2 of them were compatible with us Samantha and Vanessa never will I forget you I thought but then I knew that one was just using me for information so she can survive I was like a messenger boy I thought true as it was I played the fool and went along with it fake friends only use you for their own benefit….

Age 14 – The other me

As this all occurred my heart slowly mutated into two one with half of my emotions I slowly began forgetting memories I had fast, my mom thinks I should see a therapist and I did memories started flowing slowly as so did the painful ones and the nightmares, the nightmares began becoming clear as I see the shadowy figure again but it was a different situation then death. When I saw the shadowy figures face it was me I fell back in the dream as I screamed slowly in my mind yelling how is this happening, "who am I" I keep repeating as the other me explained I knew he was another form of me, a form that is combined of all my pain, hatred and suffering from past to present. He was my insanity, I explained this to my parent and they said pray to god …. God I think god I yell in my head I scream in my head "he never came for me, I've been praying, going to church and all that other stuff he never came". But my mouth said nothing. I walked away as my other self - whispered saying they will all be gone soon and your happiness will return I wondered if he wanted to kill them he read it and said yes. I said no in my head as he slowly vanished. He wants revenge for those who hurt me I understand but is killing the right thing? No I said so I chained the other me to my darkened heart and made sure he never came back.

Age 14 - Present

Summer is here as the chains slowly break every time something impacting happens to me. The pain of family members dying the pain of the world in chaos the pain of it all, it's just too much for me and if the world ends I will end those who hurt me and show the world why I am who I am I will show the world what I truly am and what they really are. The nightmares may have stopped for now but I can still see the darkness covered in this world as the light constantly tries to fight it.

Angel and Demon, Light and death

File Ended Shutting down…Goodbye.