A/N: Hi all! So this is a bit different for me. First it is het (eeek! I know right? lol) and next it is not a pairing I have written or really read much of. But I wrote it for a fandom for ovarian cancer. Where not only was the goal met but surpassed! Sometimes I am awed but the generosity of this fandom so thankyou to all that gave in anyway! So I hope you enjoy. And for those missing my naughty boys I have a new story coming really soon, I am working on chapter two when that is done I will start posting.
"Damn look at that ass! Baby girl grew up!" My fist snaps out and back. "What was that for, Emm?"
"You being a douche! That is what that was for, Ed. That is my baby sister you are checkin' out." I'm satisfied with the way he is rubbing his arm. I know I hit hard and he deserved it. Bella hasn't even made it all the way up the driveway and he is ready to toss her down.
"It's not like she's your real sister, man. And I can't help it, look at her. I haven't seen her since she took off for Cali."
I glare at my best friend, shooting daggers at him. "She is my little sister, has been since she was 9, and don't you even dare thinking about doing anything with her." My threats fall on deaf ears as she approaches and I see the gleam in his eyes.
Spotting us standing there, Bella starts to bounce a bit before running over and jumping into my arms. "Bear! You're here!"
Squeezing her tight, I spin her around before steadying her back on her feet. "Of course I am, Bug. I couldn't let you come home to an empty house." Then her face falls as she suddenly remembers why she's home.
"How's dad?" she nervously nibbles her lips. For some reason, I am drawn to watching as those perfect white teeth tug on the full pouting bottom lip. Damn Edward.
Pulling myself out of the trance she has me in, I register her question. Shoving my hands in my pockets, I rock back on my heels and shrug. "As good as to be expected, Pops hasn't left his side at all. Even when he was in surgery, he was right there waiting. Ed and I have been taking him food and clean clothes." When the news came that the cancer was back, we were all in shock. The speed of the hell it was playing on his body was even worse.
"Well, I'm here now, so that will be a bit less stress on you." I nod and help her with her bags. Edward is right there to grab the last one from her.
"Hey, Bells! How's it going?" He has the balls to wink - fucking wink!
Bella was on to him though. "Really, Edward? Well, let's see. My dad is in the hospital with cancer. My stepfather is killing himself with worry and won't leave his side and I just had a six-hour drive up the coast with my batshit crazy mother blowing up my phone every other minute. So . . . umm . . . yeah, peachy."
I laugh, hard. "Testify, sister!" She is laughing too at Edward's shocked expression. "So your mom's still nuts, huh?"
"As nuts and bigoted as ever. You'd think after a decade she would get over the fact that dad left her for a man but . . . you know." I nod. I remember how it all went down clearly. Probably clearer then Bella - I was 15. She was only nine.
"Well, as long as she keeps her crazy in Tampa, we're okay." She nods and follows me into the house. As though he had known who came in with me, the cat is there crying and winding his way around Bella's legs. Bending down in front of me to pick up the pale tabby, I am stopped dead as her ass almost brushes against my fly. Stunned stupid for a second, I look at the soft curve of her full behind. When I catch myself, I look to see if anyone noticed and catch Edward - not catching me, but still with his eyes fixed on my sister's ass.
So I punch him, harder than the last time, but he has the good sense to stay quiet.
Pulling out a stool, Bella sits and cuddles the cat, purring and cooing to him. "Bells, you know how Dad is about Too being up by the counter." I scold and she responds by sticking her tongue out at me.
"Oh, please. How is it any different from Pops rolling around in here with him on his lap?" I never understood the logic either, so I just shrug.
"So, what's the plan, sis?" For some reason, I am fidgety and busy myself looking in the fridge.
"I want to see if I can get Pops out of the hospital for a bit and visit with Dad, then back here to veg." Sliding off the stool, she reaches for her duffle bag on the floor and I am greeted with a view straight down her tank top. "But first - a shower."
As she heads out of the room, Ed is once again a douche. "Need any help." No need to hit him again, though Bella gives him the one-finger salute and shoots back, "Not if I had no use of any of my limbs and you were the last person on earth, Eddie boy."
I laugh at her sass. "Burn!"
"What? I had to try." He is unapologetic as he bites into the huge sandwich he mooched.
"Tomorrow, we are starting a douche jar." Ed just shrugs and nods like he is on board. I knew it wouldn't make him change his perving. He was like that - a ladies' man, always hounding. I myself was a here-and-there dater - never really playing the field, just a steady girl here and there. Since Rose though, there hadn't been anyone, so I have been on a dry spell for sometime now.
"You know - maybe you should go to the doc. You must be low on testosterone or something if you didn't find that hot as hell." I don't respond. I don't even look at him. I just calmly walk over to the cabinet and pull out one of Pop's Mason jars and put it on the counter in front of him.
"A dollar," and I leave the room.
Dropping Bella's bags off at her room, I can hear her voice carrying out from the bathroom - off key and cute as hell. My mind wanders to where she is, then to way that her body looks - small yet curvy, wet suds dripping from her hair and running down . . . I cut myself off and slam my door and throw myself on the bed.
"Get a fucking grip, Emmett. That's your baby sister." I beat myself up for it. I can't think like Edward. Maybe I just need to get laid. Yeah, that's it. I need to go out and get a piece of tail.
Thinking about how long it had been, I am sure that is what is going on. But the thought of going out while dad was sick and leaving Bella alone at home when she just got here, I couldn't commit to it. Not right now anyway - so it looks like it will be a one-man-only performance.
The shower helped a little and by the time I was dressed again and wandering back into the kitchen, I saw Bella was gone. I was grateful for the reprieve, but was laughing a second later when I spotted the jar on the counter that had a five and a few ones in it. It had been labeled "Edward's douche bag jar." Looks like he stayed a bit longer after I left him.
There is also a scribbled note from Bella telling me she went to the hospital and will be home after visiting hours. Looking at the clock, I see that it is a few hours away and decide a home-cooked meal would be good. I love to cook, but haven't had the chance in quite some time. There's no one but me here most nights. So, grabbing my keys, I head out to the store.
Picking out the ingredients for Bella's favorite dish goes quickly until I hit the checkouts and run into Jess. She has been trying to get in my pants since high school. Though she is attractive enough, she was annoying as hell and had a nasty rep. I believe it too. I have walked into my fair share of bathrooms at parties and seen just what kinds of kink she is into.
"Hey, Emmett. How's it going?" As she starts scanning the items, I notice she takes every chance she gets to lean over and flash her very fake cleavage at me. I pick up a magazine and pretend to be interested - fake never did it for me. I like more natural like Bella's soft swell . . .
Fuck! Nope, not going there.
"Everything is good. Dad is doing better - not out of the woods, but better." I glance up to see her stripping me with her eyes and not even paying attention to what I am saying. So, knowing the feud she has always had with Bella, I snap her out of her mentally fucking me. "Yay, so Bella is home and I thought I would cook her favorite dinner. Maybe we can have a movie night on the couch."
That did it. I see her spine stiffen and hear the sharp intake of surprise. She always blamed Bella for me not sleeping with her. Which is true at first, her and Bells were friends in middle school, but Jess had a crush on me. I was 19 and they were just turning 13. After a while, Bella figured out the only reason Jess was hanging out with her was to see me and then it turned ugly. Over the years, I spent a lot of time when I was back from college fighting her off.
"Movie night with Bella, yay, fun." She didn't even hide the fakeness in her voice.
"Yup, PJs and popcorn," I tell her as I slide my card and finish up with my purchases. "Catch ya around, Jess."
It felt good to mess with her, though I know which bars to avoid for the next couple of weeks. Anytime she knows that Bella is in town, she makes it her mission to try and get in my pants.
Back at home, I set to work making dinner with the music cranked and my best dance moves.
"Looking good, McCarty. Shake that moneymaker." Bella always loved to give me shit when she caught me dancing.
It was a long crappy drive home. The reason I am going back - it something I always feared would happen. But not as bad as the worst of my fears. Psycho mom calling every so many miles wasn't helping any. She was hell bent on the fact that 'the fag' deserved it. Eventually, I stopped taking her calls.
Rene was bitter and a bitch. I tried for years to deal with her rants and raves. I was over it now. She was left by her husband of 11 years - yes, left, because he figured out or finally had the courage to say he was gay. Yes, but now to say he deserved what he is going through - well that draws the line with me. I am done. My last response to her was to tell her to fuck off and not to call again. Still she calls - every 20 minutes my phone will signal another voice mail. Another one I will delete.
It felt so good when I saw the outskirts of Seattle coming into view. I felt like I could breathe again. I enjoy Cali, but it never feels like home when I am there. Everyone said I was just homesick, that it would pass, but it never did. I miss the rain. I miss the green, the coffee shops and the rarity of the sun. I miss my family. I start to feel the energy pour through me as I make the familiar turns and stops. As I see the white peaks trimmed in deep green, I speed up a bit. Pulling into the long drive, I break into my first real smile since I got the call last week.
Dad was going in to have some exploratory surgery and the removal of some lymphs. We had been down this road before and were hoping we never would again. But here we are, the battle was on once again.
Cutting the engine, I hop out to grab my bags. I have them all out of the truck and swing my duffle over my shoulder when I see them there. Now I am truly home.
"Bear!" I sprint and jump into his arms - his big strong arms that always make me feel secure and whole.
After giving Edward some hell, I was a woman on a mission. Mission number one, get the road stink off me. Mission two, get Pops out of Dad's room - at least to get a little fresh air. They have always been that close, but I worry about Pops as much as I do Dad. The cancer had been a shock the first time and it about killed Pops.
I was 11. I remember listening to them cry with each other at night. I saw how much weight both of them lost. Their bond was that strong - what one felt, the other did. I was just a child. Hell, both Emm and I were still kids, but now I am an adult and I will pitch right in and do what I can.
After my shower, I throw on the first jeans I pull out of my bag and see Emmett has dropped off the others. I open the door and yell out my thanks, but am met with the sounds of his own shower running. A sudden flash of water running down his chest pops in my head. I cut it off before it blooms into the full monty of daydreams. Shaking my head, I move back into the room and secure the door.
There were quite a few times, I let my teenage fantasies get away from me when it came to my "big brother," but I got past that - or so I thought. I will just have to try harder to keep them deeply hidden. I would be mortified if he found out because I stared too long at his chest, or held on a bit too long when he hugged me. Shaking away the thoughts completely, I throw on a T-shirt and grab a hoody. Slipping into my Vans, I head out to find Edward still in the kitchen, stuffing his face.
"Thought both of us leaving the kitchen would be your cue to leave?" I quip. Edward is a good-looking guy, for sure - once you get past the wild hair and douchebag-ery attitude. But he never really did it for me. Plenty of girls did, though. He had someone different in his lap every other week - sooo not my type.
"Had to finish my snack. Plus I wasn't sure if you might change your mind about needing help." He wiggles his eyebrows at me. Looking down, I see a jar with a dollar in it. I laugh out loud.
"Ahhh, I see Emm is watching that show, too." I grab a large sticky note and a Sharpie. Scribbling a note on it, I slap on the label and turn it to face him.
He shrugs and reaches for his wallet. Looking through, he selects a bill and pops it in the jar. "Only got a fiver, I guess I'm covered for a few days." I watch him put it in the jar and go back to eating.
"Knowing you, Eddie boy, that won't even cover you until I walk out the door." He smiles wide around his last few bites of sandwich.
Sure enough, not only had he used his five up, but added two more ones he found in his front pocket.
Ahh, it's good to be home.
Winding my way down the halls, taking in the familiar smells, I feel more than a little ill. I block out the memories of how close we came to losing him the last time. I steel myself for how he might look - how they both might look. Taking a deep breath, I lightly knock before going in.
They aren't quite as bad as my mind's image had made them. They are both pale - Pop's native skin has a bit of its glow and Dad, though always much paler of the two, is ashen now. They both look like they could use a week of eating and sleeping in the sun. I don't let it show on my face though. I plaster a smile on my face and will a cheeriness to my voice.
"I leave you guys alone for a few months and you go and get sick on me?"
They both look up and their faces instantly brighten. "Bells! You're here." Leaning down, I kiss Dad's cheek.
"Of course, I am. Where else would I be?" Moving over to kiss Pops, I pull a chair up next to his wheelchair.
"Well, we knew you were on your way, but you must be tired from the drive. Thought we wouldn't see you until tomorrow." Looking behind me at the empty door, he sees I'm alone. "Where's your brother?"
"He and Edward are back at the house as far as I know. I was hoping on getting some baby-girl time in." Grabbing each of their hands, I squeeze them gently.
"Well, I think we can handle that." Pops smiles. "For sure." Dad squeezes back, weaker than I like.
"So, what's the game plan here?" I feel no need to beat around the bush. I want to get the facts and get my daddy back home where he belongs.
"Well, they think it is isolated and should be easy to get." Dad tells me.
"But?" I know there is more.
"But it means more chemo," he grumbles.
Pops sighs next to me. "All that beautiful hair."
"I told you, Billy. I can grow the mustache back." I see Pops eyes tighten.
"No, you will not. We would look like members of the Village People." This has Dad laughing.
"Or gay porn stars of the eighties." Dad wiggles his brows. Pops is laughing and I am shuddering.
"Eww, guys, come on! Your child is present." I know what goes on between two guys. I am not offended by that, but not when it is my own parents.
After some serious talk and some catching up, I beg Pops to let me get him outside. He agrees, only with a lot of pushing from Dad, too. He only agrees to walk me to my car, but it is a start.
Seeing dad was getting tired, I say my goodbyes and promise to be back with a real lunch tomorrow. It will be a treat, since he is starting chemo in a few days and it will be awhile before he is able to enjoy real food again. Walking down the ramp, I chat lightly with Pops, but as we pause in front of my car, I really look at him.
"How are you really doing, Pops?" He rubs his hand down his face and looks up to the almost blue sky.
"I'm tired. I'm worried. I'm 'so over this' as you would put it." His chuckle is humorless. "We have just had so many hurdles. I have to wonder - when it will be enough? When we can just live out the rest of our lives in peace?"
I nod in understanding.
"You know, when I adopted Emmett, I felt it was the only way I was going to have a family. I was wheelchair-bound since the age of 20, gay and living in a small town. When the dirty-faced scrawny little boy of six came into my life, I felt I had a purpose. I could take this little boy. I could fight for something. I could make a difference. So I fought, I battled and I got this boy to raise." Emmett was lucky when Billy found him, and he showed how grateful he was for Pops every single day. "Then Charlie came along. Kind, funny, gorgeous and interested, but in the end married. I felt defeated, but at least I had Emm."
I wipe the errant tears from my cheeks and squat down next to him. "I know, Pops."
Smiling and wiping away more tears from my face, he rests his hand there. "Then the day Charlie showed up with you in tow, I knew that it was all worth it. The fight with Rene in court, the first bout of cancer - I looked at the life we made and every hurdle was worth it. I guess right now I am trying to find that spark to get my second wind and . . ."
"I get it, Pops, and for me, even if it means walking through the fires of hell, this family and being a family. . . it is all worth it." Straightening up, I pull him into a fierce hug. "OK, Pops, enough of the sad. I will call tonight and be back tomorrow."
He nods and wipes a tear from his own face. "OK, baby girl, drive safe and don't drive your brother too nuts."
I laugh and wave out the window as I drive away. I can see him watching until I leave the lot.
I remind myself we have been here before. We have been through the radiation and chemo. We have been through the tests and scans. We will get through it again.
Calming myself as I pull in the driveway, I am comforted by the idea of comfy PJs and curling up on the couch. Letting myself in the back door, I am laughing and honestly a bit turned on at the same time. The sight of Emmett busting a move as he moves around the kitchen is really funny and cute. I find it hard to keep my eyes off his back side - his tight ass and swirling hips . . .
"Lookin' good, McCarty! Shake your moneymaker!" I whoop out, trying to distract myself, but at the same time reminding myself what I was looking at.
Hiding my blush behind my hair, I move over to the stove to see what he is cooking. "Makin' your favorite, Bug." He beams a proud smile at me. Have his eyes always been so blue? The dimples are getting deeper for sure. I look away quickly.
"Smells great, Bear. I can't wait to eat." He moves up behind me and grabs a spoon out.
"Here, taste." He holds a spoonful of chili up for me to taste. Leaning forward, I do just that and moan at how perfect it is. If I'm not mistaken, I hear his breath hitch. Looking up at his eyes, I see they have gotten darker, dilated. Coughing a bit, we both back away quickly.
"It's great, perfect - just like I remembered." I mumble fast as I make my way around the counter. "I'm just gonna go change my clothes. I'll be back in a few."
As I rush down the hall, I hear the spoon clatter in the sink and maybe a curse. "He probably just dropped something," I think. Shaking my head, I am sure that minute there was just me.
"You let your mind get away from you sometimes, Bella." I splash water on my face and look at myself in the mirror. My cheeks are a bit flushed and my lips seem a bit fuller. Yup, I look a bit aroused. Grabbing a scrunchie, I pull my hair back and get to work scrubbing my face. Yup, that will do it. I look red and flushed because I just washed my face.
Once done, I look at myself and am almost satisfied. There is still a sparkle to my eyes, but there is nothing I can do there.
"Wait, yes!" Digging through my bag, I find my contacts case and my glasses. Quickly ridding myself of the lenses, I rinse my eyes and slide my glasses on. I rarely wear them and Emmett knows that, but I can blame road grime.
As I change into a pair of running shorts, big socks and a Corona hoodie, I have to laugh at the lengths I just went to over 20 seconds in a kitchen that meant nothing.
Satisfied I have it under control, I leave my room and hear the clattering of dishes. He never did learn to be quiet. He may be a gentle giant, but he is as loud as a herd of elephants.
"Hey! Dad will have your ass if you break his good dishes," I joke as I move down the hall.
"I didn't break anything, Bug, and I am just using the old." As I round the corner, the bowl he is holding slips from his fingers and shatters.
"One down," I laugh, but he is frozen in place just staring at me. "What?" but he doesn't say anything, just bends down to start cleaning up the pieces.
Finally, as he is sweeping up the bits, he opens his mouth. "Nothing, I was just thinking I owe Rose a big 'I'm sorry' over what I called her." At last, he looks up at me and sees my confused look. "I called her some nasty names and blamed her for stealing that shirt."
Oh yeah, of course, the shirt. I knew it was his favorite. That is one of the reasons I took it. I wanted a piece of him with me at college.
"Sorry, I hope it wasn't the cause of the break up." I would be really actually kind of happy if it was. I never liked the bitch. She was all about getting him tied down and her hands deep in his bank account.
"No, that isn't why, Bug," he loosens up and bit and grabs a new bowl. "No, I caught on that she was into me for my looks and my trust fund. After she didn't exactly deny it, I cut ties really quick."
Sitting down finally, things "normal out" some. Our conversations pass without thinking about it. It was a natural flow. We had done this a hundred times over and could a hundred thousand more without fault.
"So, she really made no play that it was any other way then?" He crushes his crackers in tiny pieces as I opt for big chunks, and shakes his head.
"Not at all. In fact, she said 'I was beautiful. She was beautiful. I had money coming and she deserves to live rich and that it was the perfect pairing'," and he scoops a big bite of chili into his mouth.
I, on the other hand, sit with my mouth half open and spoon mid-air. I think over what he just said and put my spoon back down. "The hell?"
He nods as he chews. "Truth," he says, with a mouthful of food. There it is - the brother I know and love is back and all the previous nonsense of the day forgotten. We are talking about town gossip and who is up to what. I share with him why Edward is pushing 10 bucks in his jar. And it is all how it should be.
We fell into the laws of the house - the cook gets out of the cleaning up. So after we are done eating, Emmett disappears upstairs to get into some sweats and I set about on the clean-up. Luckily, we have both learned over the years to pretty much clean as we go when we cook. We both know what it is like to be left with a mess - as that was how we told each other over the years how pissed we were at the other.
By the time I have the dishwasher started, I can hear him in the living room fiddling with TV.
"What do you want first, action or comedy?" he yells out to me. I groan. He has the worst taste in movies.
"What crap did you get at Redbox? I have first veto." I hear his full-on belly laugh and I know I will be watching crap tonight.
There was a moment there where I was sure I was going to kiss her. Bella, my baby sister. Bug, the same awkward girl in braces that I teased about having lettuce in them. Bells, the same girl with gangly limbs and acne that I reassured it would get better. The girl I beat the hell out of Mikey N. for the day before I turned 18, because he tried to cop a feel when she got boobs and was finally confident enough to stop hiding under oversized shirts.
Her lips curved around that spoon and she made the most amazing sound. It went straight to my dick. I watched as her face was entranced in pure lust over something I had made for her -something I was feeding her from my own hand.
She was flushed and flustered as she ran down the hall. I was thankful she did. I mean . . . shit! Could that mean I scared her when I went all weird and shit? Was she feeling it? No, shit, never mind. No, I was happy when she left the room quickly.
I stood there half-hard, holding the spoon she just had her lips wrapped around as she disappeared. As I heard her door close, I broke my trance. Looking at how I was holding the spoon - just the same place it had been after it left her mouth - I broke out of my "dumb fuck" and threw it in the sink.
"Fucking Edward." I blame him, but if I let myself think back too hard, I will find too many times I have looked a bit too long, over-reacted to a guy's come-ons and comments. Kicking the door frame, I yell at myself a time or two and concentrate on getting myself under control.
"This is Bug. Shit, man! Stop!" Giving myself the sister speech again, I manage to get myself under control enough to get out the dishes and toppings. I am not as graceful as usual, which means I am a big old clumsy fool, but I manage to get everything on the table without dropping it. That is until I hear her coming down the hall and get my first glimpse of her.
She is giving me shit about my clumsiness - like she is one to talk - and I have it all under control until I spot her. I have seen her in every sort of outfit - tomboy to prom wear. But standing there in my old Corona shirt and shorts, with her hair pulled back and her blue-framed glasses, I am dumbstruck. I can't form a coherent thought to save my life.
I am pulled back out of my stupidity with the sound of the bowl shattering on the tile. Yup, I'm smooth like that. Luckily, things chill out and dinner goes like normal. I do manage to escape the kitchen though before I am tortured with the sight of her loading the dishwasher.
I try again to figure out what the hell is going on with me. Just earlier today, I was all up in Ed's face about Bella being my sister. Now I am drooling over her like some pervert. Lord, help me! Maybe zoning out to some movies will help.
After the first movie, which I found funny as hell, Bella banned me from ever picking the movies again.
"If that was the really good one, Emm, I am not even going humor you with a glance at the second. How about we just pull one off the shelf?" I agree, but I will be watching the other tonight - with or without her.
"Oh, wow, check this out, Bear." She hands me a disk cover and slides the disc in the machine.
"Home movies?" I groan. "Do we really need to sit through the torture of school plays and old soccer games?" Our parents recorded everything. We were our own reality show before they were even cool.
"Oh, come on, it won't be that bad." Then she bats her eyes and I cave. Clapping and bouncing, she hits play and snuggles into my side on the couch, just like she always does when she gets cold. This time, though, it feels different.
"Bell, if you're cold, why don't you put on some pants?" She shakes her head and I feel her ponytail brush the back of my arm.
"No, you are warm enough for both of us." Damn it if she doesn't snuggle in closer.
I try to ignore her scent that rises up, try to keep my mind on the images on the screen as I feel her soft little body and the rise of her breast as they brush my side. Grabbing a blanket off the side of the couch, I cover us both. I'm hoping like hell she scoots away with the added warmth, but also doesn't spot the growing problem in my pants.
After a half hour or so, I am able to actually watch what is playing out. We watch as the years change. Birthdays, Christmas mornings, us in the pool goofing off. About an hour in, I see a pattern emerging - something I wasn't even sure I was conscious of at the time. Just as I was about to ask Bella if she saw it too, I hear her soft snore.
Hitting stop on the remote, I gently slide away from her and lay her head on a throw pillow. I would carry her to bed - it would be no effort at all - but as confused as I am right now, I can't. Covering her with another blanket, I shut down the TV and click off the lamp. Settling into bed that night, I replay the home movies again and again in my head until exhaustion takes over and sleep wins out.
The next few days thankfully - or maybe not thankfully - I don't see much of Bella. I am left to my thoughts - thoughts I really don't want to have, but need to be examined. Over the years, I took on a role. Right from the start, I craved family. The first memories I have of my childhood are begging someone - anyone - to take me out of the hell of a druggie mother and revolving door of men and give me a real family. I got that when I got Billy, the loving man that took me in and fought for me, fought tooth and nail for me. But still even then, I wanted more. For almost 10 years, I wanted to feel like a fuller family. The day Charlie and Bella came into our lives, I got that too. Suddenly I had two parents to love me. It didn't matter to me that it was two guys. They loved me and that is what counted. Then there was Bella - sweet little awkward Bella, all arms and nervous energy. I stepped up and took on the role of big brother. That was it. From the minute we became a family, I took on the role and played the part well. Now though - now I'm not sure it was the big brother thing. Protective as I have always been, I'm not sure it was based strictly on brotherly intentions.
"Earth to Emmett! Come in, Emmett." Bella breaks me out of my head.
"Sorry. What, Bug? I kind of zoned out - lot of work shit on my mind." She looks doubtful at me for a minute, but shrugs it off.
"I was asking if you want to go with me to pick up the 'rents tomorrow? Dad gets to come home, remember?"
"Of course I remember, and yes, I'll go with you. You suck at lifting Pop's chair and driving his van." Truthfully, Bella sucked at driving anything, but she was the worst in the van. It has two dents and has had countless taillights replaced as proof.
"Fine," she huffs. "But for the record, only two of the taillights were my fault."
"Yup, whatever you say, Bug." I like these times with her - times when I don't have to think about the deeper shit, times when we can just be us.
"So now, he is outpatient then?" Bella had been keeping up more on the course than I had. They began treatments almost two weeks ago. Originally, he was supposed to be all outpatient, but there were a few setbacks when he took the chemo - worse than the last time.
She nods and continues to fold her laundry at the table as I eat at the island. "Yup, he should finish up everything here at home and then the wait is on."
I look up just in time to see her folding a pair of white cotton panties with light purple polka-dots on them. I swallow hard and look away. I start to fiddle with Edward's jar on the counter and notice more cash to it.
"Ed was here?"
"Oh, yes! Eddie boy was here. That boy is gonna go broke soon," she laughs.
"What was it this time?" I am scared to, but I ask anyway.
She shakes her head and removes the cat from her stack of warm laundry for about the fifth time. "No, Too! Go sleep somewhere else. You know Eddie - once a douche, always a douche."
I feel a bit of anger that he was here giving her crap and I wasn't here to stand up for her. I know it is irrational. I know she can handle herself with my best friend, but I still want to kick his ass.
"Bug?" I know that she blows him off as much and as easily as I do, but some protective streak in me wants to know.
"Really, Emm, it is nothing - and it put 20 more bucks in the jar," she shrugs it off.
I feel the urge to growl and go caveman. Maybe I didn't fight the growl, judging by the hand on the hip and glare she is giving me.
"Emm, put the bear away. I charged him two tens. First, he made some comment about washing my underwear the old-fashioned way in the tub. That cost him a ten. Then he asked what I was gonna do with the money in the jar." I quirk my brow at her. "I told him I was going to buy him a gag."
"Ohhh, OK. I can get on board with that." It is the perfect idea for the money. Ed needs it sometimes - OK, all the time.
"Yeah, but then he told me I would look hot in leather, holding a whip over him." She gets a coy satisfied smile. "He still owes me ten for that. I charged him double."
I can't help but laugh. Edward is still gonna get an ass-kicking, but I am fist-bumping Bella in my head.
"He's a good guy though, Bella. He is an ass, sure, but a good guy." I have no idea why I am defending him - maybe self-preservation. "He really seems into you. Or is it you have a guy in Cali?" I am really going for the twist of the knife right now.
She chuckles, "I know Edward is a good guy, but so the example of why I rarely date. I went on a few dates. Believe me, college guys are a waste of time. They are hormones in Nikes. They think they can buy you an In and Out burger and you should worship them on their futon an hour later. Yup, not my idea of a real relationship."
I wanted to pummel the asses that took her out with no more than that to go on. But she starts talking again and I am in a trance of soaking up anything else to come out of her mouth.
"I dated a pre-med guy that wasn't that bad. Jake - native, actually from Pops tribe - but I don't know, he just was way too intense. It didn't really go anywhere and he was always on me about not being serious enough about my major. Like if I wasn't all about using photography to go into news or third-world countries and shit, I was nothing more than another potential papparazzi in the making." I wanted to rip the fucker limb from limb, but I squeeze my thigh to keep myself in check.
"Well, I am glad you dumped his ass."
"Understatement of the year, asshole" goes unsaid.
Bella gives me a weird look, but busies herself with putting the last of her clothes back in her basket. "Yeah, well, guys my age, I don't know, they are just well like Eddie - overgrown 12-year-olds. Eddie, yeah he is cute, but he is one that is gonna take way too many years to mature." She shrugs and puts her basket on her hip and walks out of the room, but pauses at the hall and turns back to me. "I guess I was spoiled. You and the 'rents just set too high of a standard on what a girl deserves."
I thought about what she said - for days. My thoughts turned from the carnal to the way we were raised. I thought about how I have always acted towards Bella. It haunted my thoughts the night she had said them and into the next day through work. I kept thinking about it as I picked her up to go get our parents from the hospital and then the whole night as we were taking care of Charlie. It kept coming back to me as we were getting into a routine over the next few days. I watched how we were as the family we had always been.
It was easy to see our family as it had always been. With Dad and Pops there, it was easy to keep myself in check. But I saw how we were - how she took the lead and I was there to back her. I was there to catch her fall or back her up. How long had we been like this - been this team?
Three weeks after she had been back, I was more confused then ever. I had no idea what the hell was going on. At 25, you would think I knew what was going on, knew what I wanted. And in a way I did, and it made no sense.
"Dad doesn't want to eat, but I think that is the vomit talking. I'm gonna go grab some seafood soup and wantons from Chi's for him." She has been mother hen since he has been home. "You want anything, Bear?"
"Um, sure, just grab some buffet for me." She nods and pecks my cheek before rushing out the door. I sit there touching my face where her lips had just been. It almost tingles. It was a simple peck - something she has done many times, but something this time is different.
Hearing Pops rolling down the hall, I drop my hand and busy myself shuffling through some paperwork. I think I am a second to late to act casual, because he stares at me for a minute before rolling further into the room.
"So, did Bells leave already?" I nod and pretend to concentrate on the work in front of me.
"Um, yeah. She's hoping Dad's favorite soup will get him to eat." He nods at that, then cocks his head and does that weird stare again.
Straightening up in his chair, he goes back to normal. "That girl is somethin' else, I tell ya."
Truer words were never spoken. She is amazing. "Yeah, she is. Mother-hen tendencies aside, she is gonna make some guy a lucky man when she ties him down." The thought brings a twist to my gut.
"Well, I am sure whoever he is, you will put him through the ringer and make sure he is a good enough man." With that weird statement, he leaves me to my thoughts and my work.
Losing myself in work, I avoid any more thoughts of Bella and the man that is good enough for her - until she comes twirling in with dinner.
"I'm gonna take them dinner, then I will be back to eat with you." She is in and out of the room in a flash.
Pushing my papers aside, I start unpacking the food she brought. Deciding she needs a bit of nice, I grab plates and good chopsticks and start plating the food.
She got us both the buffet, so there is a good assortment in each container. I smile when I wonder if she even realized that she put some of our favorites in each container. We always get buffet and we always wind up picking off each others' plates.
Bouncing back into the room, Bella smiles as she slides into her seat. "This is nice. You didn't have to plate it."
"I wanted to do something nice for you. You have been going a mile a minute since Dad came home." There is a slight blush to her cheeks.
"Well, thank you." She moans as she slips the first bite of lo mien into her mouth. There is an instant reaction below the table. "So, lots of take-home work tonight?"
I am grateful for a distraction. "Um yeah. Who would have thought running a gym would bury you in so much paperwork?"
We talk through dinner and she makes me laugh - a lot - and I try my best to make her laugh. She has a giggle that warms me every time I hear it. After we finish and the table is cleared, she says goodnight and I am alone with my thoughts. No longer able to concentrate on work, I pack it away and wander into the living room. Picking up the remote, I hit play on the same disc I had caught myself watching many times over the past few weeks.
I was up to the part with her graduation. There is a moment as she walks across the stage where the camera pans to me. I am standing and cheering louder then anyone else. I pause it when it pans back to her. I study her face - her shy blush, her pride of her accomplishments. I freeze frame back to my face. I see the pride and the . . .
"So you finally figured it out, then?" I am startled by Pops' voice breaking the silence of the room and cutting through the screaming in my head.
"What? Ah, hey, Pops, what's up?" Coming up to the sofa, he stops beside me with a soft smile on his face. He points to the TV.
"You are finally figuring out that you love her." It is a plain statement - no anger, no judgment.
"Of course, I love her. She's my sister." He shakes his head.
"I know that, but you love her as more. You always have." I give him a "what-the-fuck" look.
"You're crazy! There is . . ." He cuts me off by holding up his hand.
"Son, it has never really been brotherly. It changed over the years. You changed to fit what she needed - a brother, a friend, a protector. Now though, I think you are starting to see how it is changing again. You love her." Staring up at the screen, I think back over the years.
The times I thought about a boy asking her out. The thoughts that consumed me as she was out on dates. The need to follow and make sure whatever unworthy guy she was out with kept his hands to himself. The thoughts now that she was back - I shake my head. Looking at Pops, he seems to know I need to process.
"It's okay, son. We have always seen it. We just wondered how long it would take for you two to notice." I stare at him with my mouth hanging open. They have always known? "We were hoping it was when you both were mature enough to handle it. Nice to see it all worked out that way."
"But, I mean, how? I, ah . . ." He softly laughs and pats my leg.
"I suggest you talk about it with Bella. Instead of skirting around it, sit down and talk to her." With a final squeeze of my leg, he leaves me to my thoughts. Hitting play, I watch through until the end of the disc. I watch carefully as her last birthday plays out.
I study Bella. I study the way I watch her. I watch her watch me. Could it really mean what Pops said? Then I see how she lights up at my gift to her. It was a new guitar, one she had been wanting for months, one that she played every night last summer as she sat on the back porch taking in the stars. As she opens it, I see a look in her eyes. I watch as she jumps on my lap and hugs me. I see the way she sinks into me and sighs.
"Fuck, I love her, love her!"
Weeks. It's been weeks since I came home and instead of getting Emmett - in that way - off my mind, it is getting worse. I kept myself busy helping with dad, running errands and making sure I am not home when Emmett is. So far, no such luck. Sharing dinner with him last night, I completely gave up fighting it. I didn't know how, but I was gonna put on my big girl panties and let him know.
Luckily, I had a good friend in Angela. She was there back when we were growing up. She might understand. We are meeting for coffee and gossip. I can always bounce ideas off her.
"I'm telling you for the last time - I don't and never have found anything wrong with it. We all had crushes on him when we were younger! Hell - half the town still does!" Angela shocked me by not being shocked at all when I tell her about my changing feelings about my "brother." In fact, she was hell of a lot of support for it.
"You really are something else, you know that." She grins huge and sits back holding her arms wide.
"What can I say? I'm not afraid to let my freak flag fly." Just as I'm about to comment on that, the most annoying voice in the world pipes in from behind me. I see Angela's eyes tighten.
"Bella, hey there. Emmett told me you were back. How are you?" Turning slightly, I see all the teased blonde hair and fake boobs and plaster on a fake smile.
"Hello, Jess. I'm fine. How about you?" I despised the woman since the day I met her. She was a whore and was forever trying to get in Emmett's pants. He had taste though, thank god.
"Oh, I'm great - working and going to school. Looking forward to see your brother again." The way she said it made my skin crawl. She likes to make it sound like they have a thing every time I see her, but I know better.
"Yes, well, he's been busy, you know - sick dad and all."
"Yes, well, I am sure I will see him soon. Poor thing is probably in need of some R&R." I want to vomit. Thankfully, Ang speaks for me as I fight back the bile.
"Don't count on it, Jess! For one, he has taste and it isn't whore-flavored. And two, he has Bella here to take care of him." I about spit my coffee all over the table when she said that.
Jess, on the other hand, just glared and left in a huff.
"She makes my skin crawl." Ang shudders and brushes off the imaginary "ookie" bugs.
"Mine, too. She never gives up." I shake myself a bit.
"See, you need to make a move and mark him as taken." She is sitting forward in a make-impact kind of way.
"How? Do I go up to him and say 'I know your my brother and all, but I kind of love you not-like-a-brother and I want to jump your bones?" I am blushing, even just talking to Angela. I think I would faint in front of Emm.
"Yes, exactly! Or just go even more direct, walk up to him grab his face and kiss the hell out of him." I wish I had her guts.
"I want to be you when I grow up, Ang." She smiles huge.
"That's the thing. I never grew up and never will."
I hope like hell Angela's pep talk helps. Doubtful it will, but a girl can hope.
I fidget. I pace. I try to act like nothing is going on. Thankfully, Emmett is still at work when I get home. I help the 'rents and help pack the car for their fishing trip, even though it isn't the kind they usually take out in the boat. It will be nice for them to just sit on the dock and spend some time in nature. Dad was feeling up to it and Emmett and I encouraged it.
Funny thing is, I thought they would both fight it when I brought up the idea, but they jumped on it. After they pulled away and I am alone, I start in on my nervous habit of stress cleaning. I had been doing it a lot lately, so I am disappointed when I am once again without something to do.
Managing to calm myself a bit, I settle in with a magazine on the couch. I'm almost completely calm until I hear the door close.
"Hey, Bug! I'm home. Did the 'rents get off okay?" he yells and I squeak and jump. "Jeez, Bug, you okay? I didn't think I came in all that quietly."
I feel my cheeks getting red, and my heart starts racing again. "Yeah, I guess I was just really into the article I was reading." Truthfully, I was zoning out, not reading. I couldn't even tell you what magazine I had in my hands.
"Oh yeah, what's it about?" Busted. I glance down quick and see the picture and quickly read the article title. Fuck - "How to get your dream guy in bed."
Quickly shutting the magazine, I toss it to the side. Emmett sees the cover and laughs. "Never mind! With that mag, I don't even want to know. I might lose my man card."
I giggle nervously and jump up off the couch. I have no idea how or when to do this, but I have a few minutes reprieve because he was training today and obviously waited to get home before showering.
"You smell, Bear. Please go shower." He laughs and raises his pit as he passes me.
"That's man baby - 100% pure grade A prime rib American beef." Okay, maybe this will be easy. He will gross me out with his manly antics. I turn to tell him something witty, but my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth.
I turned in time to see him pulling his tank over his head. The muscles of his back ripple and taper as my gaze drifts down. His trim waist is perfect as it disappears into his loose shorts. I don't need to see the rest. I have the vivid memories over the years that have played in my dreams.
I bite my lip and catch my reflection in the window. I'm a mess. Running to my room, I start ditching my clothes as I go. Rummaging through my drawers, I try to find something right, but not like I am trying to hard. I want to look like myself, like there is nothing going on, but so he sees me as a woman and not his kid sister. If I am going to make an absolute fool of myself, I at least want to look great.
I settle on a dark green tank and a khaki skirt, nothing fancy but nice. Hopefully he won't make too much of me being in a skirt - something I rarely wear. Running a brush through my hair, and sliding some Chapstick across my lips, I check my reflection again. This time, it is to my approval.
With my hand on my door knob, I think everything over in my head a quick dozen times before walking out of the room. The butterflies are busy having a party in my stomach and my hands are shaking. I busy them by going to the kitchen and pulling out sandwich makings. I know Emmett, and after a training day, he wants turkey on rye with the works.
He is coming down the hall, just as I am finishing up. His hair is wet and he didn't bother with a shirt. Once again, my brain stops.
"Hey, is that for me?" I nod and try not to drool. "Thanks, sweetie. Looks great - I love how well you know me." He takes the plate from me and kisses my cheek. In a split second, I slap my hands on his cheeks and turn his head. There is a brief moment of shock on his face before I seal my lips to his. It isn't really sexual, but it certainly isn't a sisterly kiss either.
I break away after no response from his mouth. Backing away, I see the plate slip from his hand and crash to the floor. He doesn't move. I'm not really sure he is even looking at me - more like he is looking over my head at the cabinets behind me. Then my heart takes a dive down to my stomach as he turns and leaves the room. I want to cry! I want to scream! I want to fight! I don't do any of it. I stand and stare at the empty hall for an age. It stays empty.
My phone ringing on the counter breaks me from my trance. Not bothering to look at the ID screen, I answer with a shaky voice, but keep my eyes trained on the empty hall.
"Bella! Hey, it's Edward. Don't hang up." I huff out some air and against better judgment, don't hang up.
"What's up, Eddie?" My voice is deadpan, even to my own ears.
"Well, I was wondering if maybe I could take you out tonight. Maybe grab a bite to eat and a movie?" I pull my phone away from my ear and look at it. Was he for real? I just fucked up my closest relationship by letting my urges get in the way and he wants me to go out on a date? With him? The king of douches?
"I promise - best behavior. Just, you know, maybe hang out have some fun?" He was sounding very non-douche right now and as I continue to stare down the empty hall, I know I fucked up. I know I ruined everything. Maybe a night out with someone else will erase some of my mortification.
"All right, Eddie Boy, but only if you can be here in the next five minutes." I hear a little whoop through the phone.
"I will be there in four." Disconnecting, I can't believe I just said yes. What was I thinking? That's right, I wasn't. Grabbing my bag, I do a quick face-check, though I pay no real attention. Slipping on my shoes, I hear the door open and Edward walks in.
"Hey there, ready to go?" True to his word, he says nothing to contribute to his jar. He doesn't even run his eyes up and down me. It is like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers." He even grabs my sweater off the barstool and before reaching out an arm to rest on my back.
"If even a pinkie touches her, Cullen, you are a dead man." Emmett's voice jars us both and the tone of it sends a cold chill down my spine.
We both turn around and Emmett is standing there - fists clenched, jaw ticking and the veins in the side of his neck bulging.
"Dude, it's cool. We were just gonna go grab a bite to eat." Edward even looks scared.
Stalking towards us, his eyes briefly leave my face to glare at Edward, but go right back to my face. I feel like his prey as he stalks over. I back up until I feel the cold of the fridge at my back.
He reaches me and doesn't even pause - one hand goes to my waist and the other glides around my neck, burying his fingers in the hair at the back of my head. My own hands move to his shoulders instantly as his mouth descends on mine. Moaning, I open to him without a moments' hesitation.
It feels right. It feels amazing and I let the groans and moans flow freely. The world stops - fireworks, apple pie, Christmas morning, and coming home. His arm on my waist tightens and he pulls me closer. I can feel his arousal against my stomach and I relish in it.
Then a "Holy Shit" pulls us from each other - reminding us both that we aren't alone. I look to my left with wide eyes. Glancing back at Emmett, his is not so nice.
Moving slowly, Edward reaches in his back pocket and pulls out his wallet. Slipping a bill out, he moves quickly now, putting it in his jar on the counter, stuffing his wallet back in his pocket.
"Thats a fifty. I think it will cover most of what I am thinking right now and a small part of what I will be saying tomorrow." Then he darts for the door. I hold tight to Emmett's shoulders as I feel him twitch to go after his best friend.
"Don't." I whisper, pulling his face back to me as he glares daggers at Eddie's retreating form. His eyes finally focus on me. His face goes from "murder you in your sleep" to a softening one - an angelic look of bliss. Then he stiffens slightly.
"What were you thinking? Edward? Really?" His face was a mix of hurt anger and love.
Slapping my hands on his shoulders, I push him away. I start pacing and let my temper fly.
"What was I thinking? Really? What the fuck was I thinking? I was thinking I fell in love with," air quotes happen "My 'brother.' That I showed my 'brother' that I love him - in a very not socially acceptably way. I was thinking I have beat myself up over it for weeks. Wait! No! I have been feeling it subconsciously for years and then I kiss him. And what does he do? He drops the dinner I made him and hides out for an hour or more in his room! He gives me no idea what the hell he is thinking!" I kick off my shoes and face him. "I think I have made a total fool of myself! And then his best friend calls - a good looking guy. Yeah, sure, he needs a clue, but he is good-looking enough and has a job. He calls and asks me out. I think 'OK, I made a fool out of myself.' And I think 'Well, someone wants me, so I say yes.' That is what I was thinking."
"You - in no way shape or form - will ever, EVER! go on a date with the grand douche! Do I make myself clear?" This statement not only got me extremely hot and hopeful, but also pissed me off a bit.
I can't give him the chance to have the upper hand though. I can't have him pulling "Mr. In Charge." I won't have him pulling the big-brother card that has driven away countless boyfriends. I get up in his face. I pull some finger action, and yell right back.
"You don't dictate who I do and don't go out with. You have no right to say what I do or not do. I am a grown woman! I will be twenty in two weeks! I have earned my way into college! I have been on many dates, had sex and . . .,"
I am cut off with arms around me and his mouth once again crashing into mine. Well, OK then - I pushed the right buttons, I guess. The kiss was fierce, hard and quick. Ripping his lips away, he stares me down.
"I have a problem with sharing." All my girly bits melt and I swear my panties have poofed up in flames.
"Sharing? Last time, I looked you didn't have ownership on me." His brow quirks and he gave me a half smile. I may have sagged into him a bit.
"Bug, by the time I'm done with you, there will be no mistaking whose you are." He nibbles down my neck and I want to give over completely but I need - no, we need - to talk.
"Emm?" I try to push on his shoulders. All I get from him is a "mm." Pushing on him again, I make a little progress. "Emm, we need to talk." He groans into my neck but pulls back.
"Really, Bella? You want to talk, now?" He whines and looks like I took away his puppy.
"Yeah, don't you think so? This is - I don't know - weird?" I put a little distance between us, but not too far and my eyes never leave his for two reasons. Every time I do, I feel tingly that I might get to keep this man forever. The other - because if I look down his body, there won't be any more talking.
"Well, the first time I really even thought about you like that was after something Ed said. Then I couldn't shut it off. Every time I got my thoughts back on you as my baby sister, you would say or do something and well . . ." Scrubbing his hand down his face, he cocks his head and smiles. "Listen Bug, long story short - I'm in love with you. I have gone over it a million times in a million ways and I don't think I have ever seen you as my sister, but just as someone I love."
Licking my lips, I finally look him up and down. His shoulders are hunched forward slightly with his hands stuffed deep in his front pockets - like he is unsure of how I will take it and trying to make himself smaller. His long muscular legs are shuffling just slightly. His head is dipped a bit, but his eyes are on me from under dark, long lashes.
He is waiting on me. I shake the stupid off and run and jump at him. He barely has time to get his hands out of his pockets, but does in time to catch me. I feel secure and safe and very turned on wrapped around him. Grabbing his face and letting my hands plunge into his hair as I practically swallow him whole, his hands tighten on my ass and we are a mess of grunts and groans. Teeth knock and tongues swirl. It is desperate and probably doesn't look that sexy, but it is the perfect expression of what we are feeling.
I feel us moving and just hope it is to somewhere flat. Feeling how far we are, I know we are just a few feet from our rooms. There is a pause in his steps and pulls his lips away, I hope he is not stopping and just wanting to know which room. His breathing is hard and his eyes dart from door to door.
"Your's, bigger bed." I pant out. Then his mouth is back on mine and we are crossing the threshold - past the moment of going back, forward on to the moment that will change everything.
Laying me back on the bed, he straightens but is still kneeling between my legs. My skirt has ridden up. My peaked nipples are showing through my tank and showing off that I am not wearing a bra. I am on full display for him and I am exposed, but I really don't feel like it. The way he is looking at me has me feeling beautiful and loved.
"I love you." I tell him. His smile is one I have never seen before, but hope to see for the rest of my life.
I could kick my own ass for nearly missing this. Seconds - I was seconds away from missing this. Bella spread out on my bed, miles of dark hair spread out across my bed, nipples pebbled and begging. Creamy thighs spread, showing tons of ivory skin waiting to be licked and kissed. The soft pink of her small cotton panties needing to be peeled from her slowly, but not to slowly. The more I look, the more I yell at myself.
After she kissed me, my brain screamed but shut down all at the same time. I went into panic. I went to my room and sat on my bed. I only meant to be in there for a few minutes to wrap my head around everything. Only it wasn't minutes, it was over an hour. It pains me to think what she was thinking all that time. Coming out, I could see what was on her mind. She thought I was rejecting her. I couldn't help the red I was seeing when I saw Edward's hand about to touch her. There was no way that was happening. Yup, I went caveman. Yup I backed off, and yup, I got the girl.
After hearing her tell me, she loves me though - seeing in her face how much and just how she really loves me - I feel like I have won the lottery and the Super Bowl on the same day. There is no way in hell that I could be this lucky, but her hands around my waist pulling me down closer tell me that I am.
"Emmett, I really do. I'm not sure when or how it shifted, but I love you." A shiver runs through me. Leaning down, I support my weight on one bent elbow so I don't crush her.
"Bella, I am so in love with you. I think I always have been. Pops pointed it out to me actually." There was a small gasp from her at the mention of him and her eyes got huge. "He pointed out that we have never really been brother and sister really. It has been an evolving thing. Like I was being what you needed until we were here, like this. I think he's right."
She nibbles her lip and I want to be doing the nibbling. I know she is thinking it over as her eyes dance all over my face.
Her hand comes up to rest on my face and she slowly smiles. "I think you're right. It has never felt wrong to compare all other guys to you. None of them measured up - I think I was always looking for you."
Leaning down, I need no more confirmation that she is as on board as I am. Capturing her lips, I give all the kiss I have. By her response, I am assured I am doing it proper.
I feel her calf wrap around my thigh pulling me deeper into where I want to be. I gladly move in and press forward. Her other leg wraps around me and pulls me tight. I rock into her and she moans into my mouth as her hips push back.
Her body is small but full under me, and her heat pushing into me is telling me I am not going to last until the big show if I don't pull back.
"Bells . . . I . . . shit," I look down at her red swollen lips and glassy brown eyes and am once again hit with a wave of "Holy Fuck, she is beautiful." "I'm not a ladies' man. I don't do this a lot, but you have me ready to blow in my jeans."
She turns bright red and turns into her hair slightly. A little giggle escapes her - a very young virginal giggle. I freeze. I know she had her speech in the kitchen, but "Bella, have you . . . you know?"
Her blush deepens, but she looks at me and gives a little nod. "Once," her voice is soft and quiet. "I really never thought a guy was worth it, but I - well, you know - wanted to see what all the fuss was about."
She isn't giving me much here. "And?"
She hides briefly behind her hands before running them up through her hair and then slapping them on the bed next to her. Looking to the side, she is turning bright red. With a finger under her chin, I bring her face to mine. She doesn't meet my eyes, but at least she is facing me.
"Bug? Don't hide, and don't be ashamed of anything." Finally, her eyes meet mine.
"It . . . well, it wasn't good. He was clumsy, I was tense and yeah, not exactly something I wanted to do again." This has me worrying that she is only doing this for me. "Don't go in your head like that, Emm. I want this now. With you, I have been consumed with the thoughts of you making love to me."
I am skeptical. "Are you totally positive?"
Sitting up a bit, she grabs the hem of her shirt and it goes flying. She lays back and I am fixed on the glorious sight in front of me. The most perfect mounds of flesh I have ever seen. The soft swell of her ivory skin, topped with soft pink pebbled hard nipples begging for my mouth.
Laughing and laying back, she looks up at me. "You gonna stare all night or are you gonna play?"
Shaking my head, I quickly sit back and yank my own shirt off, and pop the button on my jeans. "I'm playing for sure." She giggles and quickly shucks her skirt, so she is laying there in nothing but her panties. Taking her lead, I lose my jeans.
I am straining against my briefs. As Bella looks up and down my body, I fight back a smile as her eyes go huge when she reaches my cock.
Her mouth forms a delicious little O. I can't help a small laugh as I cover her with my body, careful to keep my weight off of her. "Don't worry. We will go slow and yes, it will fit."
Turning her head and burying her face in my arm, she mumbles against my skin. "Did I say that out loud?"
Turning her face back to mine, I shake my head. "No, but your face said it all." There is a moment of just looking at each other, then her tiny hands slip around my neck and pull me down. Then the time for talking is over.
Her lips are the softest I have ever had the honor of having on mine. Her body molds against mine perfectly. I feel the soft swell of her breasts pressing against the hard muscle of my chest. Kissing my way across her jaw, I suck and lick and nibble my way down her neck and finally my mouth latches onto her breast. Her back arches and a soft gasp escapes her lips. Turning my eyes upward, I see her head thrown back and her eyes closed in pleasure. Popping my mouth off her breast, I run a finger down from her chin to her belly button. I watch as she shudders and looks down, following the finger.
Her eyes lock with mine as the finger reaches the top of her panties. I run the finger under the elastic. With one quick wet kiss on the regretfully neglected breast, I place slow wet kisses down her body. Her skin is soft as silk and has a light wildflower smell that has always reminded me of her. It smells so much better this close.
Circling my tongue around her navel with one hand still toying with the top of her panties, I move it to the back side. My other hand toys with her nipples before I begin running the back of my fingers down her side to rest on the other side of her only remaining clothes. Looking up as my lips reach the top of the pink cotton, I see her eyes open but heavily hooded. Her bottom lip is between her teeth. She watches me intently as I slowly guide the cotton over her hips and down her legs.
I worry that she will feel exposed, but all those worries fall away as her leg drops to the side, laying herself open and bare for me. And she is beautiful like that - not just the pleasure spot she is laying out for me, but her whole being. Head to toe, there for me to see - from her hair spread wild across my bed down to the flush of excitement that covers her to the beautifully pink lips between her legs, neatly trimmed and glistening with how excited I have made her. Licking my lips, I start kissing my way up. I want to dive right in, but I want to make this so right for her. Starting at her knee, I place soft kisses and licks. I find secret ticklish spots and erotic ones. After what seems a lifetime, I get to the place where I want to be - the place where I am twitching and doing baseball stats in my head. I am not sure how long I can hold out, but I have to have a taste.
The moment my tongue tastes her core, I shudder and her hands are in my hair fisting tightly. I hear her moans voice from her lips for a brief moment before I hum and her thighs lock around my ears. Her bucking hips and grinding against my tongue have me not caring. She is telling me how well I am doing with the flow of her desires rushing on to my tongue. Swallowing it down, I am in heaven. I try my hardest not to grind my leaking erection against the bed. I don't want to finish until I am surrounded by her.
I feel her legs tighten and how tight she is pulling my hair. I can sense she is close, but all too soon her thighs loosen and my head is being pulled away. I look up in confusion.
"Please, Emmett, I want you in me. I want to come with you inside me." Her face is showing how close she is - flushed cheeks and dilated eyes, lips red from her chewing on them. I swipe a hand down my mouth and chin and give a nod. Standing quickly, I drop my briefs and dart for the dresser. I hear a whimper of loss and confusion from her, but am back in a flash.
"Condoms." I hold up the gold wrappers with the black lettering and see her swallow hard - no doubt thinking again about my size. "Don't worry, baby. We will go slow. I won't hurt you."
Her small nod and softening eyes reassure me that she is putting total trust in me. Climbing back up beside her, I take her mouth again, telling her how beautiful and in love I am in that kiss. I feel her relax into me as I tear the packet open and roll it on, Her hands squeeze my shoulders, pulling me closer. Soon the heat is back and I am rolling her back and settling between her legs. Pulling away from her mouth, I give a soft nip at her neck before reaching between us and placing myself right at her entrance.
I look at her and she gives me a small nod as I push forward. I go slow - not just for her, but because I want to be fully in her before I blow. The build-up and the emotions have me close already. She is tight and resists the intrusion a bit. I am scared to hurt her, which helps to calm me some. I must show the worry on my face, because Bella's hand on my face has me pausing.
"It's okay, Emm. I'm fine." After a moment of staring into the deep chocolate of her beautiful eyes, she nods. I nod back and push forward.
She gasps, but it soon turns to a moan. A cross between a groan and a growl escapes my chest as I am fully seated in one long stroke. I can feel her pulsing around me, adjusting to my size. I have to breathe deep and try to remember political events to keep myself from losing it.
All too soon, she adjusts and her pulsing stops. Her legs go from bent beside my thighs to me feeling her heels grazing the back of my thighs, finding a home just above my ass. Her fingers are sneaking their way up my shoulders and neck and into the hair at the base of my neck. She brings my lips to hers as her hips buck up into me. Her urgings spur me on and I start to move.
"Oh god, Emm?" She sounds like there is a mixture of confusion and excitement warring within her. I move again - a slow deep thrust as my lips lock around her breast. I keep the slow thrusting pattern going as my tongue swirls around her nipple and her fingers grip my hairs so tight I am afraid I will have a new form of male pattern baldness.
Tearing my mouth sadly away from her breast, I wrap my arms under her arms and over her shoulders as I keep my slow thrusts. Looking into her face, it is contorted into a mix of emotions. She is truly a woman discovering pleasure for the first time.
"You okay, baby?" I ask. She gives me a huge smile and nods.
"I feel like I need to explode," she says on a frantic breath. "I . . . I . . . I need . . ."
I know what she needs and I need it too. "You're ready?" Stupid question, I know, and I would love to be here for hours, but I am realistic and know how first times - intense times - can be. Thankfully she nods and I pick up the pace. My thrust become frantic. She clutches my back and I capture her mouth. It isn't what it could be, but it is what we need. It is us joined top to bottom. There is time for more later, but right now this perfect. This is the rest of our lives.
I feel the first pulses as I swallow her moans. I feel her fingers dig into my back and her legs tighten around me. The minute I feel her spasm around me, I pause and let myself go. I wish it wasn't latex collecting me in that moment, but push that thought away as Bella's sweet heat milks me again and again.
I am sure my face doesn't show it, but I am in heaven. I tighten my arms around her for a moment before bringing my breath under control and looking down at her. She is smiling up at me, also breathing hard. I kiss her forehead then her lips. We settle our breathing down together. Pulling my lips from her, I stare at her and she has never been so beautiful.
"Wow!" she says.
"Wow is the fucking least I could say, but yeah, I have nothing better." I take a few seconds to look at her and - no, I can do better. "I love you."
Her breath catches. "I love you, too."
We fell asleep shortly after that as I was drawing circles on her soft bare back. I can't remember ever sleeping so well.
The weekend was fantastic. I thought things would be weird, but they weren't. We were just like we always were - except for the sex. There was a lot of sex. I guess the poor bastard that was her first didn't know what he was doing or missing. Once Bella discovered what she liked, she was insatiable. She was always touching and kissing and cuddling. I can't complain though. I loved every second of it.
"We should probably venture out and get food. The 'rents will be home tonight." We were laying in bed after another round and she is tracing the lines of my chest.
"Mmm, I don't want to - I want to stay in our little bubble. I don't want to deal with people." Placing her hand flat on my chest, she raises up on her elbows so she can look at me.
"How are we going to handle this - you know, out there in the real world?" I can see the worry in her eyes.
"Bug, I'm not gonna hide this, if that is what you are worried about. We aren't related. Hell, Dad and Pops haven't even gotten married yet. As far as I'm concerned, we are doing nothing wrong. I'll be proud to tell the world to fuck off, because you're mine." After a few moments of milling it over, she breaks into a grin, pushes up and hops off the bed.
"In that case, I know the perfect way to tell everyone all in one stop." Throwing on some jeans and a shirt, she turns back to me. "Come on, lazy bones. We have a gossip monger to feed."
The light bulb goes off and I am hopping out of bed and looking for my pants. "You are evil, Bug! Beautiful, smart, funny - but you, my girl, are evil to the core."
It worked out brilliantly. We got a few looks when we were holding hands, a couple of gasps when we were caught kissing in frozen foods, but it was more of shock than anything. For the most part, it was just our neighbors and friends we encountered, and being the very diverse neighborhood we live in, we were met with no real problems. That is until we made our way to check-out. Bella had forgotten something, but I went ahead and started checking out as she ran back.
Jess was her typical self, pumping up and out her breasts and trying to flirt. As she reached the end, she did her best pouty lips and tried to make flirty small talk. "Is that everything, big man?"
Here came the fun part. "Hold on, Jess. My girlfriend had to run back and get something." I had to bite the inside of my lips to keep from laughing at the shock on her face. She was even turning a bit red.
"Girlfriend? I haven't heard anything about you seeing anyone. Is it serious?" She was now wavering between a red and green color - the anger and curiosity warring in her.
"Very serious, I think she is the one that has put the final nail in the coffin on my single days." Her mouth opens and shuts a few times before she relaxes for some reason. Then she smiles and laughs.
"Very funny, Emmett. You really had me going there." She has a sickly sweet smile on her face. "Hey, Bella, nice to see you again."
Bella nods to her. "Hey, Jess. Bear, I hope you're okay with this brand. They are out of the usual." Slipping my hand around her waist, I bend down and peck her lips and she sighs and leans into me.
"It'll be fine, Bug." Her arms don't leave my waist as we both look at Jess, who is frozen with her mouth hanging open.
"Is there a problem with the scanner, Jess?" Bella asks. Jessica shakes herself and scans the condoms, watching us and giving the total. Never commenting on us wrapped around each other, her eyes never leave us as we gather our bags and sneak another kiss before leaving the store.
"Well, I guess everyone will know by . . ." I'm cut off by the ringing off phones, "now, I guess."
Bella giggles and puts both phones on silence for the rest of the night. After dinner, we settled down with a movie. Bella drifted in and out on my lap as I watched and it just seemed like everything that had made no sense finally did. This right here made sense - me loving her, her loving me, our family, everything. There was some unseen force that brought Charlie and Billy together - not just for them to have the happiness, but for all of us to find our destinies.
As the credits roll on the movie, I hear the quiet opening of the door as our parents come in. Bella doesn't stir and I make no move to wake her. They both pause in the doorway. I look up at them and see nothing but love in their eyes. They look at each other, then us. Blowing a kiss to us, they carry on to bed.
That was that. We never had a big discussion. We never made it awkward. It was just us together after that. We met with a few challenges and nasty gossip, but nothing we couldn't get past. It was easy - like that is just how it was meant to be.
Bella transferred schools. We eventually got our own place, but it was only two houses down from our parents. She graduated - and though she had her own job in graphic design, she spent most of her time helping me to open a second gym. We were married the summer of her graduation. Edward's money helped to pay for most of our honeymoon. We welcomed our first son the following spring and the twins a year later.
There were no real shocks or battles. It all seemed too easy, but we are okay with that. We were blessed - Dad went into remission and was cancer free for years. We had each other, our children, our friends.
I have learned from life to keep my eyes and mind open, because if you don't, you can miss out on everything life has to offer. If I hadn't woken up when I did, I never would have had the chance to see how beautiful life can be.
Rolling over, I wrap my arms around my beautiful wife and nuzzle into her thick long hair, breathing her in and ready to wake her in a very special way. Just as I place my hand on her belly, I feel the kick. She bolts up, running to the bathroom. I hear her emptying her stomach followed by the flush. I also hear the bickering of the kids downstairs over the last of the Fruity Pebbles.
Coming out of the bathroom wiping her mouth with a towel, Bella looks to the door, then me and glares. "You are getting snipped before I pop this one out, McCarty. I am done."
The baby kicks again and I see her face soften as she rubs her belly. She smiles down for a minute, but her glare soon returns to me - then we both laugh. Yes, life is beautiful.