Hey. Look. New chapter. Cool.
We should get out now.
Hell no! We got some hurt to dish out.
Boss will cut our paycheck…
And we'll cut his neck in return.
We're also lost.
"We're not lost!" I snapped. "This place just has too many corridors. Besides, we got the map."
It's upside down.
I grunt in frustration, crumpling the map in my hands.
"Screw that," I declare. "I got dowsing skills."
I quickly whip out my sword.
"LED US TO FOX-FACE," I yell, swinging wide.
That's not how you –
BAM. The wall panel next to me collapsed, neatly sliced in two, and revealing a rather lavish room with the Fox himself, all wrapped up in his precious Rose. Oh, and half-naked. Don't look kids.
"Behold my dowsing skills!" I shout, sword held high.
"What the f*ck!" Rose screams. She smacks Fox-face on the arm. "Do something, idiot!"
Fox-face shakes out his stupor, and quickly punches a button on the wall. A panel in the roof opens, spitting out another fish net trap. I toss the rope to side with the hilt of my sword, smiling at them all the while.
"Yeah, you see, Mr. Fox, I've been in this business for a pretty long time," I tell him. "And I'm use to betrayals, hidden plans, and bald guys who like to pet white fluffy cats while cackling evilly."
I pull out my gun and level it at him, thumb on the safety.
"And what you tried to do – minus the cat and pits of spikes…"
"…was so very cliché." I pressed down on the trigger. "Bang."
Kids, no matter what TV tells you, people will end up in court for murder, one way or another…except death. That's the third way out. I'll tell you the other two later.
Right now, I'm being convicted of the attempted murder of one Rose Marylyn. Outrageous, innit? I didn't even touch the bitch, the bullet did. But that's not something you say in court, especially when aiming for "not guilty, your honor." So I settle for rolling my eyes while drawling,
"Oh puh-lease. I wasn't 'attempting to murder' her. I was just trying to severely maim her."
Gasps all around the courtroom, and my lawyer very subtly smacks himself in the face. As in, Pearl Harbor subtle. But don't worry; my lawyer, embarrassed as he is right now, is actually a pretty good guy. At law practice, I mean. Not morally. Everyone knows lawyers are bloodsuckers with a penchant for big stuffy books.
My lawyer stands up, face faintly red from the slap he gave himself.
"Your honor, what my client is trying to say is that he was only acting in defense. In the event that Miss Marylyn and Mr. Hite had forced him to…"
I begin to tune out.
This is boring.
Let's shoot stuff.
Starting with that Rose girl.
No, that security guy over there. He's been giving the stink eye for a while now.
Or how about that the judge himself?
F*ck it. Let's kill everyone.
My finger started to twitch. Tempting idea, but…
THE WORLD'S FATE IS IN YOUR HANDS. SHALL WE KILL THEM? OR SHALL WE SAVE THEM? I'M PROBABLY NOT GONNA LISTEN TO YOU ANYWAY, BUT YOU CAN TRY YOUR BEST TO CONVINCE ME. Also, I gotta admit something to you guys: most of what I've done so far was pre-written like some months ago. That's how I've been churning out chapters faster than my past average rate which was...pretty slow. And I'm saying all this because I just ran out of pre-written stuff. So updates...will be slower...uh. Yea.
(OH AND THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS AND FAVS AND FOLLOWS SORRY FOR BEING A DOUCHE AND NOT SAYING THANKS UNTIL NOW K BAI)