The morning light was not at all gentle as it woke Loki, who turned over and groaned before opening his eyes and accepting conciousness in defeat. He decided that the next use for his novice magic would be to put up thick curtains on all his windows.
But first he felt he had a mission to do.
Thor, more out of anger than actual spite, had left the palace, leaving Loki utterly alone to fend for himself. He instead made his way through the city to Sif's home. When he arrived she threw the door open, happy to see him.
And then she saw the look on Thor's face.
"Loki means to erase his own memories!" He raged once inside.
"Why not let him?" Sif asked, turning the roasting pig on the spit.
"And maybe others. He's already erased my mothers. And my father put him up to it."
"So you really shouldn't go against them." Sif said absently, although it was her true opinion.
"My father thought it better to erase my mothers memories, to lie to her! How come I'm the only one who sees what's wrong with this?"
Sif slammed the wall with her fist, a look of fury approaching her as she said evenly, "I do agree Thor, I think it's sad and cowardly. But what can you do when your father wishes it? Perhaps he has a reason?"
Thor blanched, "Loki claimed mother was ill from the mere knowledge and sight of Loki."
"You know your mother is a strong woman." Sif said, feeling a little desperate to repair Thor's damage, "And you know your father has great trust in her capabilities. If he believes she can't handle it, then why can't you trust him?"
"Why would he have Loki do it?" Thor asked, avoiding Sif's question, "Why not do it himself. He replaced her memories rather easily, why couldn't he... Oh no..." Thor leapt up and started to run back to the palace, Sif screaming for him to wait as she ran after.
Thor couldn't hear her though, he was to angry and wrapped up in his thoughts, he could barely register where he was going much less anyone trying to get his attention.
By the time he reached the palace doors, Volstagg, Fandrall, and Hogun had joined Sif as they chased him through the gate and down the halls.
Thor crashed into the library, spying Loki sitting at a chair with large books in oddly calm and strong hands. Loki jumped and looked at Thor, looking back down when he registered the look in his brother's eyes.
"You're still going to do it, aren't you?" Thor asked.
Loki looked up at his brother defiantly, an eyebrow arched and a determined sealing his lips.
"You're going to erase everyone's memories aren't you?"
Again, Loki refused to answer. Thor gave a roar and tore the book from Loki's hands, throwing it to the ground and slamming both hands on his little brother's shoulders.
"Thor!" Thor turned in time to see Sif and the boys run in, Fandrall and Hogun tearing Thor from his brother. Loki immeadiatly lept up and scurried over to the book, scooping it up in his arms and heading for the door.
"Loki stop!" Sif commanded, making the fourteen yearold freeze.
"Take the book from him Sif!"
"Quiet you." Sif said a little less commandingly. Loki sniggered from the doorway.
"Loki," Sif said lightly, "Please, give me the book." She held out her hand, "We don't want to forget." The boys nodded and Thor shot an 'I told you so' look to his brother.
Loki clutched the book closer to his chest, "That's insane! You're all just saying that because Thor said it!"
"No Loki, it's the truth." Sif insisted, but by the look in the boy's eyes she could see she was getting nowhere with him.
"It's like this everytime! You don't actually think do you? Not a bloody one of you! If Thor said to jump off the Bifrost you'd all kill eachother to get there first wouldn't you? Wouldn't you?!"
"No, you can't talk me out of this Volstagg! I don't care what Thor believes! I know we're better off not remembering. It's worked for my mother and it'll work for us. Tell me, which of you hasn't had a single nightmare every night since we got back?" Loki fumed, fingering the books pages even as it lay closed tightly against his chest, "Which of you hasn't woken screaming in the night begging for your parents and wishing Odin would take mercy on your life?"
"Loki!" Everyone cried.
"You wont remember a thing I say so I'll say whatever the hell I want!" Loki said impatiently, "I don't care what the allmighty Thor believes! I know none of us can survive with these memories. Even when our scar's heal we'll never be able to enjoy a complete night of sleep or fully trust anyone. We'll believe the world is a dark and horrible place within which the darkest of corners contain that aweful man and his horrible orginisation. We'll all gladly die on the next battlefeild, believing our burden to be lifted." Loki continued to tremble and spew whatever he thought sounded like a justification for what he was doing, all the while caressing the side of the book with long and nimble fingers. Flexing ever so often, pulling his hand into a fist and bending it down before continuing to slide his fingers along the book.
Sif looked abashed and slightly hurt, "How could you say such a thing?"
"Because Lady Sif, it's obvious. I've seen it in the warriors brought to the palace for medal ceremonies and given banquets for valor on a battlefeild. The higher the award, the shorter they live to enjoy it."
"That's not true brother." Thor argued, "You speak with a selective memory."
"Oh yes, lets hear this from the one who falls asleep during the ceremonies and is to busy stuffing his face at the banquets to pay attention to the conversation." Loki snarled, "Thor you have no idea what you're talking about."
"Neither do you Loki." Sif said, "I've been to many of those ceremonies-"
"I don't care Sif! I absolutely do not care!" Loki thundered, "I want to hear nothing from the lot of you, the Thor worshippers who handle his every request, even setting out to stop the little brother from completing a task Odin assigned to him."
"How can you claim the All-Father sent you on such a mission?" Thor said for the sake of argument.
"Why else would he teach me the spell in the first place?" Loki asked snidely before he threw the book he'd been holding at Sif and ran.
Loki didn't stop running until he'd reached the tallest tower of the palace. He locked the heavy door and willed the door to strengthen itself with his magic. Then he slid down it to the floor, sighing in relief as he opened his palm to reveal the page on the memory spell he'd been trying to relearn.
He knew his pathetic little speech wouldn't sway any of his-ahem, Thor's-friends. But he needed the distraction, as he now had what he needed to figure out the spell. And this shutup tower of the castle would be the last place anyone would look for him, giving him almost all the time in the world to figure it out.
He opened the crumpled page and looked it over. The requirements and instructions were exactly as Odin had instructed him. But there was a problem. Such a spell was to be preformed on a single person, not a group.
Loki still had a ways to go before he could fix everything, until then he was trapped in this room overlooking all of Asgard.
So yeah, crazy chapter huh? :p
I guess I really wanted to show alittle bit of the older Loki when he gets angry here...
oh, and because she so politely requested it: OOMARA13 I AM YELLING AT YOU! YOU ARE STILL BANNED FROM COMMENTING HERE!