Harry Potter


Harry Callahan JR.

Chapter Twelve









NOTE: People complain about the editing. UNLESS you see a name below, consider the chapter UNEDITED. That's what First Edited by and final edit means. And this is one to the guest who left a nasty review, GET A FRAKING LIFE. DON'T LIKE IT DON'T READ IT AND WRITE YOUR OWN. DON'T TELL ME HOW MY STORY SHOULD GO AND WHO HARRY'S GIRLFRIEND SHOULD BE. I DON'T LIKE BOOK 5-7 I think they SUCK BIG GREEN DONKEY *****

To everyone else, we return to our scheduled programming.





Halloween was three weeks gone and Harry and Ashley had racked up thirty-nine detentions and lost Ravenclaw house six hundred points which they didn't care about but had the rest of the house pissed off at them.

The clock for lunch hour rang as Harry and Ashley sat down to eat in Harry's trunk. Harry was trying to think of a good prank when his eyes settled onto his miniatures for Warhammer. With a grin he stood up and walked over to the bookshelf that contained them.

"What are you doing?" Ashley asked as she dug into the large supreme pizza Harry had cooked for them while they were supposed to be in History of Magic.

"Oh, just a prank," Harry stated as he pulled out his wand and picked up the case that contained his skeleton army.

"With those?" Ashley asked as she looked at the neatly painted figures.

"Yes, as you know we enchanted them last year to move on their own in a combat situation. I was thinking of enlarging them to man size and let them start wandering the halls while we're at dinner," Harry stated.

"What if they try and hurt someone?" Ashley asked with concern.

"They won't, I'll transform their weapons into nerf ones. Most they can do will whack you with them," Harry said as he cast the germonio spell on the figures and made multiple copies of the twenty figures.

"I think you should wait on them. What if the Death-Munchers attack Hogsmead, it would be a perfect use for them there but with real weapons," Ashley said as she took a bite of her pizza that Harry had made them.

Harry leaned back in his chair holding the General of the skeleton warriors and looked at it thinking. Setting it down, he replied, "your right. They would work better there. What should I do for a prank then?"

"Why not just leave it for the night and we will stay here and watch a movie?" Ashley said as she leaned over and kissed Harry.

Breaking the kiss, he looked into Ashley's blue eyes, "sounds good to me… But I think we should go. I just thought of a prank to pull."

"Oh?" Ashley replayed and then asked, "What is it?"

"Well it deals with a certain movie your dad likes and Ney!" Harry said with a whisper.

"Oh no! Not that one you pulled on Jeffery Duncan?" Ashley asked and then sat up and said, "You mean on…"

"Yup, Mr. Garbage disposal but I think Weasley could give him a run for the money on the amount of food he eats," Harry replied and stood up and ran into his bed room. Going to his prank book case he grabbed a blue journal and opened it up.

Ashley had followed him and said, "Well here's the chocolate," as she handed a small wrapped foiled package of Honeydukes chocolate to Harry who slid it into his pocket.

Pulling out his wand, Harry quickly practiced the wand movement several times and then grinned as he slipped the wand back into its holster.

"Ready love?" Harry asked as he grabbed his Ancient Runes and potion books and placed them in his bag.

"Not really, their so third year here," Ashley replied as she picked up her bag and they headed out of the trunk.

The day went as it usually went, them loosing points because the British system was so far behind them. The only consolidation they had was the Ancient Runes and Arithmancy teacher had them on independent study because they were further along then what they were teaching fifth years. The only one who was semi in their league was Hermione Granger who was becoming a fast friend with them after she realized that they didn't care about the rules.

Two hours of Ancient Runes review had them heading for a potion class with the Slytherins where they sat bored to tears as the fifth year class went over what was originally third year material for them back in San Francisco. They sat in the back of the class watching the rest of the students try to master an easy potion that any competent teacher could have taught them in their third year. But Snape's way of teaching was shouting, 'The recipe is on the board you have two hours to complete it and then walk around insulting everyone who wasn't a snake. One person he would insult the most was Harry and Ashley.

They had originally pared with the Puffs, but for some reason they had been switched this year after the first class. Harry wouldn't put it past Dumbledore to have engineered it because Harry was a claw and not a lion. He got the feeling that Dumbledore wanted him to be an at odds with the snakes and there were several in the class that were the children of the death eaters nut they had secretly became friends with several.

Their biggest pain was the prick Malfoy who continued to rag on Ashley because she wasn't an English pureblood and Harry because he didn't consider himself a Potter but a Callahan. Harry had finally enough of the prick after their combined potions class that Harry hit him with a diarrhea charm as he walked away with his nose in the air after insulting his father who had died fighting Voldemort instead of fighting for him and for marrying a mudblood as he called his mom. Harry had just slipped his wand away when Snape screamed out at him as he grabbed his arm.

"Detention Potter and fifty points from Ravenclaw!"

Harry looked over at Ashley and asked, "Who is this Potter that Snape continues to rant at and does he know my name is Callahan?"

Ashley giggled and replied, "He means you Harry, and you know he does, just some people cannot remember their legal names. I think he's been sniffing his ingredients to much."

"Must be love," Harry said as he looked at Snape who looked at is he was going to explode in rage and said in a soft voice, "Release me or else."

"You've done it this time. Just as arrogant as your father, well I'll see you expelled and your wand snapped," Snape snarled as he yanked on Potter's arm to drag him to the headmaster office.

Harry braced himself, turned just right that Snape stumbled and with a quick move of his left arm he had Snape up and over his shoulder where he landed on his back with a loud thump. Looking down at the man as he tried to recover his breath, he dropped to one knee with the other on his chest, with a flick of his right hand, he had a knife to the man's throat and he whispered out, "Touch me again Death Eater and your dead. Insult my dad or my dead parents again and you're dead. I've had enough of your animosity towards my dead father to last a life time. I will tell you this. I am not my father James Potter I am more like my dad Harry Callahan, a highly decorated police officer and detective for the San Francisco Police Department. My father takes no crap from teenager punks and you're just an over aged teenager punk who has never grown up. Get a life, so my father picked on you in school oh boo hoo. Grow up or else you'll never see the end of Voldemort…"

"Mr. Callahan, release Professor Snape right this instant," a Scottish voice snapped out.

Harry looked over at Professor Mcgonagall and then back down at Snape, "My dad has a saying Snape. I want you to remember it. Do you feel lucky? Go ahead and make my day punk. Remember it, it's usually the last thing a punk hears before my dad puts them down like rabid dogs," Harry said as he heard several gasps as he stood up.

Harry looked at the cluster of Ravenclaws and Slytherins that huddled behind Professor Mcgonagall as he slipped the knife back into his arm sheath. Picking up his bag, he started walking towards the cluster of students and they parted like the red sea.

"Mr. Callahan, you'll follow me to the headmaster's office. I've had more than enough of your attitude in my school and you'll be expelled for assaulting a Professor," Professor McGonagall snapped out.

Harry stopped and looked at the woman and replied, "Like I care. I'd rather be back in San Francisco then here, but your headbastard needs me here to fight Voldemort for you chicken shits who don't have the guts or the nerve to put him and his Death Eaters, like the one behind me on the floor where they belong."

"And where do they belong Mr. Potter," asked Dumbledore as he came around the corner with his glasses twinkling.

"Its Callahan, learn it and use it. As to where do they belong? They belong six feet under and in a pine box. That is where all terrorists belong, not walking free," Harry replied as he looked over at the Slytherins and in particularly Draco Malfoy who had returned after using the bathroom, "Listen up you Slytherins who families follow Voldemort. Tell them they have two choices. Surrender to the authorities and admit their crimes or die. Just remember this, I don't take prisoners and to me, the only good terrorist is a dead one."

"Mr. Potter, everyone deserves a second chance," Dumbledore said with a frown.

"They had their second chance after my parents defeated their master the first time. They ran back to his skirt robes the minute Voldemort returned, so now its payback and you can bet every death they cause will be on your shoulders Dumbledore. You should have made them take truth serum when they cried out they were under the imperis curse. Now they get no second chance, just a cell block or a pine box their choice. As I said, I don't take prisoners and neither does the American Auror force when we deal with terrorists. Now I think dinner is about to start, so we'll head there," Harry replied as he took Ashley's arm and they walked away.

"Mr. Potter, you will follow me to my office where we…"

"Hey Ashley, I think Dumb-as-a-door is going senile, he keeps calling me Potter like Snape. Maybe it's a cotangent being around death eaters because Snappy-poo has the same problem," Harry said to Ashley as they walked away.

"Could be love, could be," Ashley replied with a grin and then kissed Harry on the cheek as they walked away

"Remind me to add this alteration with Snape in my report to the U.S. Auror office when I send it out tonight. You know how they like to be contacted every night so they know we're ok and won't have to invade to find us," Harry stated as they walked around the corner.




Harry and Ashley sat down at the end of the table nearest the doors where they could watch who came in and where they sat down. Hermione came in and they nodded to the lion as she hurried over to her spot near the end of the table and propped a book up to read as she ate. Susan Bones came in with her best friend Hannah Abbott and they sat together at the Puff table as little Luna Lovegood skipped in and plopped into the seat beside Ashley.

"I hope we have pudding," Luna stated as she started filling her plate with her dinner.

"I'm sure they will Luna," Ashley replied as she watched Ron Weasley strut in and sit down next to his two friends Dean and Sean where they started eating or in Weasleys case inhaling food.

Daphne Greengrass and her sister Astoria came in with their friend Tracy Davis and sat at the end of the table near Susan and Hannah. Draco and his entourage came in and sat in the center of the Slytherin table where they could watch everything and make snide comments about anyone they wanted too.

After a few minutes, the staff came in and the looks Harry received basically bounced off of him as he ate his dinner.

Harry casually pointed his wand under the table at Ron Weasley who was currently stuffing his face with chicken. With a silent casting his spell hit Weasley in the stomach and they waited for the spell to take effect. Ron's bright red hair slowly turned black and greasy looking as a mustache grew out from under his nose.

He never noticed that he was blowing up like a balloon as he continued to eat. The people on each side of him were forced away as his gut started to push him and the bench seat away from the table. As Ashley and he watched, Ron started slowly expanding until he was as big as round as he was tall.

Ashley cast a switching spell and the small mint flavored wafer appeared on the tray next to Ron Weasley who stopped eating and looked at it and then reached for it, licking his lips.

"Hey look its Mr. Creosote," Ashley said in faked shock as several of the muggleborns laughed and the Purebloods looked around in confusion.

"DON'T GIVE HIM THE MINT!" Harry shouted out as Dumbledore and McGonagall ran toward the Gryffindor table.





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Harry Potter™ is a registered trademark and copyright (©) of J.K. Rollings and all that crap. The only thing mine is the idea and several characters. Everything else is hers including all the money... Harry Callahan is owned by Malpaso Productions… Damn wish they'd share.