I do not own any of the recognizable characters in this one shot.
Sam heard Cynthia Fee the moment he opened the front door. It was coming from Bobby's living room, and Sam had a feeling he would find both Bobby and his brother planted in front of the TV (where he had left a very sick Dean about thirty minutes ago to get supplies).
Sure enough, Bobby and Dean were both in the living room, accompanied by Cass. Sam smirked as he quietly carried the bag of groceries into the kitchen and began putting food and medication away, listening to the conversation.
"They live in this house together, yes?" Cass asked curiously.
"Yeah, Cass, it's about four elderly women who live in a house together in Florida," Dean replied, blowing his nose.
"I wish I were in Florida," Bobby muttered and Sam agreed with the older hunter. It had been a terrible winter, one that refused to go away anytime soon. Anywhere remotely warmer was an upgrade to below freezing temperatures and snow.
"Why are they in Florida?" Cass questioned overlooking Bobby's comment.
"Because Florida is the old people capitol of the world," Dean responded around three sneezes. "That's exactly why Bobby wants to be there. He's old." Bobby must have glared at the older Winchester because Dean croaked, "What? It's true."
"Just because I'm in this chair doesn't mean I won't swat you," Bobby warned softly.
"I'm sick," Dean whined. "You wouldn't hurt a sick man."
"Oh, now you're sick. A few hours ago you were right as rain."
It was quiet for a few moments as the three guys went back to their show, but Cass was the first to break the silence. "How can rain be right?"
"It's just an expression, Cass," Dean informed the angel patiently, coughing.
"The human race is strange," Cass commented and Dean grunted in agreement.
Sam folded up the bag and stuck it in Bobby's pantry. He shrugged his jacket off, hanging it off one of Bobby's kitchen chairs, and then walked into the living room, plopping himself between Cass and Dean. "What are we watching?" he asked curiously.
"A show about Florida and how it is the elderly capitol of the world," Cass deadpanned, watching the show intently.
"Ah." Sam nodded, fighting a smile. "And why are you watching this?"
"There ain't anything else on," Bobby replied sharply.
"That's not true. We can always…" Sam reached for the remote, but Bobby swatted his hand with a fly swatter. "Ow," the taller Winchester muttered pulling his hand away from the remote. "Or we can just watch this." He sank back, into the cushions, his flannel barely touching Cass' trench coat and Dean's blue blanket.
It was silent for the remainder of the episode, but as a second one started (apparently there was a marathon on or something), Dean cleared his throat, sneezed into his blanket, and said, "I'd bang Blanche if she were real."
"What?" Sam glanced at Dean, giving him a curious look.
"I have a feeling 'bang' does not mean what I think it means," Cass commented cocking his head as he studied Dean, silently asking for an explanation.
"He means 'have sex' Cass," Sam explained and the angel nodded, staring at the television again.
"I'm just saying," Dean started, defending himself, "she wasn't that bad looking for an old broad. And, well, look at me." he gestured to himself, grinning at the others. "I'd be a catch for her. Though, I'd have to worry about her hip or whatever, but that's a chance I'm willing to take."
"Ugh, Dean, really?"
"What? We would have a…"
"Stop," Sam snapped waving his hands to shut his brother up.
"I've always liked Sophia," Bobby said offhandedly.
"Really? You're actually participating in this ridiculous conversation?" Sam asked glancing at the oldest hunter.
"If it bothers you go make me some soup," Dean replied, grinning when Sam threw him a glare.
"I like that one," Cass commented pointing at Rose. "She reminds me that not everything has to be so complicated."
Sam shook his head, letting his eyes settle on the screen again. He really didn't want to contribute to the discussion, but, before he could stop himself, he blurted out, "What about Dorothy?"
"Surprise, surprise," Dean replied sarcastically.
"Of course you'd ask about her," Bobby muttered.
"What?" Sam questioned furrowing his eyebrows.
"She was like a freaking lumberjack compared to the rest of the cast," Dean replied glancing at his brother.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It is obvious," Cass said still watching the episode. "Dean has suggested that you are tall, as is Dorothy. He is not wrong, either. You both are taller than your friends."
"The tall folk have to stick together," Dean commented and Bobby laughed. Even Cass smiled slightly.
Sam got up, shaking his head, and started towards the kitchen.
"Where are you going?" Dean called after him.
"To make your damn soup," Sam replied over his shoulder.
"I never knew lumberjacks were so touchy," Bobby said and Sam could hear Dean laugh.
"Sam did not touch anyone," Cass responded sounding a tad confused, most likely giving Dean another head cock, seeking an explanation.
"Just watch the show, Cass," Dean stated softly.
This idea has been bugging me for weeks. I've recently started watching The Golden Girls. The show is addicting and I started comparing those characters to SPN's main four (I'm a freak, we've established this). I really need to get a life, I know, but until then I do weird crap like write this.
So, I really hope you liked this. I know I need to work on my other stories, but like I said this has been bugging me, and I thank you for reading.