LbN: Written for Pezberry Week; xposted to Tumblr

Lesson Learned; or The Dangers of Sexting

Hungry, horny and bored—Santana's least favorite combination. She let out a dramatic sigh and stared up at the ceiling. Rachel was at some kind of vegan lifestyle conference in Chicago for the weekend, and she was stuck here in Lima—hungry, horny and bored. Well…she could kill two birds with one stone, assuming Rachel's phone was on.

S: What are you wearing?

R: Jeans, a t-shirt, and some extremely comfortable tennis shoes.

S: Mmmm…the black jeans? I love how they make your ass look. Of course, I always love your ass.

R: No…normal jeans.

Santana frowned. Rachel wasn't taking the bait.

S: I can't wait for you to get back! I miss you so much.

R: Aww! That's sweet :)

S: I really wish you were here right now. I need some Rachel lovin'….

R: Rachel lovin'? Might I ask, what exactly does that entail?

Santana paused. That was definitely one of their code words. Was this Rachel's way of initiating sexting? Oh well…she'd go with it.

S: Rachel lovin'- you, me, preferably naked and sweaty. There are variations as to the exact details, of course, but I like to keep an element of mystery ;)

R: I see. And may I ask who this is, and how long have you been getting that particular brand of "lovin'" from my daughter. And why you've decided to engage in such inappropriate flirting when she's supposed to be paying attention to a seminar…

Santana jerked up into a sitting position and looked at the name on her phone. It was definitely Rachel's. Another text came in from an unknown number.

Unknown: ABORT! Dad and I got our phones switched before I left! He has mine! –Rachel