Raising Heart, Bardiche: SET UP!

(With Appearances from: Mai-HiME, Puella Magi Madoka Magica, and Strike Witches. Which Characters? … This is a Yuri Fic… so which do you think?)

Disclaimer: Is this really necessary at this point? I am writing a Fan Fiction that smashes together four different shows, all of which; to me anyway, had far to little Yuri when there should have been more, or a rather unsatisfying conclusion to what Yuri there was. That being said, the actual owners of all these shows could probably do a better job at what I am going to be attempting… not that they would, which is more or less why I am doing it. Why else? Because I am a nerd, and a rabid Yuri fan, that's why! Any more questions?

… *Deep Breath*…

Now that that's out of my system, let's try this again:

Disclaimer: I do not own Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha, Mai-HiME, Puella Magi Madoka Magica, OR Strike Witches. I am just trying, and possibly failing, to write them together in the same universe.

Warning: This fic contains a gratuitous amount of Yuri. If there is such a thing, it will be achieved here. Caused partly by the ridiculous number of pairings that I'm cramming into it. If this isn't your cup of tea, then please, read no farther. Anyone who dislikes this kind of thing, reads this warning, ignores it, reads this fic, and then flames me for writing such 'blasphemy' will be ignored.

Also as much as I'm going to try and capture the personalities of the characters, you can expect a little OOC-ness. Such a thing is necessary in order to bend them to my will. *evil laugh*

One more thing; I may have left my dignity at the door when I wrote the disclaimer, but if I may ask; please be constructive in reviewing. I would like to feel as I still have some skill as a writer by the time I've finished walking where angels fear to tread. Also, there will probably be numerous grammatical (i.e.: punctuation) errors in this fic. I am new to , and as such have not yet acquired one of those wonderful beings referred to as Batas, and my understanding of proper punctuation is grade school at best. My spelling is pretty good though! In either case, I hope I can make this fic worth all the rambling I've done.

This Fic is set a year after Vivio Vivid. If anyone can glean some form of enjoyment out of this fic, then I will be happy.

*Is gagged so that the story can actually begin*


Chapter 1,

A Dream Come True.


My name was uttered as a breathy whisper, as her beautiful blue eyes stared squarely into mine. My heart immediately jumped out of it's rightful place in my chest where it dropped into my stomach, before violently ricocheting off my diaphragm, and shooting up to hammer rather painfully in the back of my throat.

I gulped.

I had been waiting fifteen long years for her to say my name with such longing in her voice. I had always loved the way my name just seemed to roll off her tongue, as if it was her favourite thing in the world to say. The way she was saying it now just made me melt. She was wearing her favourite pink pajama shirt, which as usual never covered enough of her lower torso to keep my head out of the gutter. And as usual I could feel blood rushing to my cheeks. I prayed that my nose wouldn't start bleeding.

"Y-yes?" I stuttered feebly, hardly daring to believe that this was actually happening.

Nanoha gave me a rather seductive smile. She crossed our shared room with fluid strides, her hips swaying ever so slightly. She sauntered over to our large bed, (which I might add had been testing the limits of my self-restraint for the past five years, after all Nanoha and I still did sleep in the same bed, even after we moved into to our own home.) where I was resting and enjoying an old-fashioned earth book. She sat on my side of the bed and frowned disapprovingly at the open book currently occupying my lap.

"Does Fate-chan find her book more interesting than me?" she asked with that cute little pout that had a nasty tendency of wrapping me around her little finger in under two seconds flat.

I still don't think either Hayate or Signum have completely forgiven me for immediately taking Nanoha's side after one of her LV1 (Now referred to as 'training') Starlight Breakers went awry, and removed my office, as well as a good chunk of the Special Investigation Bureau from existence. Nanoha argued that the sun had gotten in her eyes, skewering her aim. Hayate argued that teaching her students how to withstand and evade an attack that can easily destroy anything within a thousand miles, while aiming at something a thousand miles away from the thousand miles really shouldn't be a part of her regular curriculum. Sensing that the tide was turning against her, Nanoha; while standing in the smoldering crater that used to be my office, stuck out her bottom lip, put on her best puppy dog eyes, and said:


"Fate-chan doesn't blame me, does she?"

I took a half second to glance at the smoking pile of ash that was all that remained of the mountain of paper work that would take me months to catch back up on. I took another half second to turn to Nanoha, fully intending to scold her for causing so much trouble, where I caught sight of that trembling lower lip. Another half second was taken to turn to Hayate.

"It wasn't Nanoha's fault." I argued. "It's all the sun's fault for being too bright and hurting poor Nanoha's eyes." I could feel a sudden anger at the sun for daring to cause Nanoha harm. Hayate just stared at me in disbelief. " On the bright side, I was just starting to think that it was about time to remodel my office anyway." Just then my chair decided to spontaneously combust, crumbling to ashes. The only wall in my office that was left standing gave up the ghost, dissolving into micro particles, and giving me a much better view of the giant hole of destruction that Nanoha had blasted through the whole building. "In fact why don't we remodel the entire building while we're at it"

"A second and a half for a complete and total 180." Signum commented dryly, the end of her long ponytail was smoldering slightly. "I think it's a new record, as for the damages? I'd say at least ten million, give or take."

"The taxpayers will be thrilled." Agito added, sitting cross-legged on Signum's shoulder. "Especially since it hasn't been all that long since the TSAB has had to use the 'SB' (That's Starlight Breaker) tax to pay for the damages. Wasn't it part of the main branch that got destroyed last time?"

"I tripped!" Nanoha shouted defensively.

"She tripped!" I shouted on reflex at the same time.

"You tripped." Agito pointed out sarcastically. "While flying in mid-air?"

"Hey!" I blurted on autopilot. "There's turbulence up there! It is possible to trip while flying!"

Agito rolled her eyes at Nanoha

"It's like you have her trained or something."

"…Nya ha ha…."

End Flashback

…Anyway, it was a pretty safe bet that as soon as Nanoha's pouting suggested that I could possibly find anything more interesting than her, let alone a silly book, that said book found itself with it's spine lodged in the wall right above my head. An occurrence that was mostly due to my haste in getting rid of it. Nanoha watched in amusement as a few bits of plaster fell from the cracks, littering my head with debris.

"It looks like Fate-chan still doesn't know her own strength" she commented as she climbed on the bed and started crawling ever so slowly up to me.

Of course my book then decided that it was time to take its revenge and obey the laws of gravity, dropping point down on my skull. It's plan was foiled however, as I was so entranced by Nanoha at this point that I didn't even register any pain as it bounced rather comically off the top of my head, before falling, defeated to the ground.

Nanoha gave a melodic laugh at the size of the hole the book had created, as she slid her hand agonizingly slowly up my leg. "…meh, the walls needed repainting anyway." With that, Nanoha brushed the plaster of my head, straddled my hips, and pushed my head down on my pillow

My heart promptly dropped back into my chest where it started playing squash off my ribcage. (Fate's Note: I think you get the analogy; my heart was pounding.)

"You know Fate-chan." She whispered huskily as she slowly lowered her head towards mine, I watched those luscious lips of hers form each syllable she spoke. "There's something I've wanted to do to you for a very long time"

The fact that she never wore any bottoms with her pajama top was for once a blessing rather than a curse as I could feel every inch of her silky smooth skin where it contacted mine. I opened my mouth to reply, but Nanoha, being the sly fox that she was, chose that very moment to grope my chest, so that:

"HHHNNGG!" was all that came out instead. I frowned, and swallowed a moan that was forming in the back of my throat as Nanoha continued with her ministrations. I took a deep breath, and forced a coherent sentence out of my mouth.

"What something?" I asked, … Wow. Shakespeare would have been proud. My voice was sounding strangled, and pathetically high pitched. Nanoha smiled lovingly at me and gave my chest another squeeze, before she started lowering her lips towards mine.

My eyes widened for a second before they fluttered shut. I couldn't believe that this was actually happening. After fifteen long years of waiting, I was finally going to kiss Nanoha Takamachi! This was a dream come…. true? It was at that point that I could tell that Nanoha's lips had bypassed mine and were now hovering just above my left ear. I could feel her every breath, causing my spine to tingle pleasantly. I supposed that I would rather hear the confession first, before the kiss. Nanoha was just following the natural order of things after all.


Wait a second! This wasn't a confession, this was about as far from a confession as you could possibly get!


It was then that my 'SB' reflexes finally kicked in.

When Nanoha aims a Starlight Breaker at you, you have only two options:

Option one: pray to your deity of choice that Nanoha wants to befriend you, and isn't shooting at you with intent to kill, although no matter what reason she has to shoot at you in the first place, it is still going to hurt like hell.

Option two: try to get behind Nanoha. It is a proven fact that the safest place to be during a Starlight Breaker is behind its shooter. If you are in front of her, you are essentially screwed. Trying to dodge a Starlight Breaker is an exercise in futility… kind of like trying to dodge a wall a thousand miles long that is coming at you with speed and power comparable to a nuclear explosion. Thus getting behind her is the only way guarantee survival.

Naturally, I chose the third, far less dignified option:

"AAAAAUUUUGGHHH!" I yelled, flailing around with all the grace and poise that I as an Enforcer was expected to have. I scrambled out of bed in order to get out of the way… that was until I ran out of bed. It wasn't until I fell flat on my face, butt in the air, with Nanoha giggling down at me, that I realized that there was a mysterious lack of a pink beam of certain doom. I also took the time to mentally curse how reality was a bitch, an evil, evil bitch.

I was at the same time thankful that Vivio was already at school. The last thing I needed was her finding out that her 'graceful' and 'cool' Fate-Mama was nothing but a smoldering train wreck when it came to Nanoha. Speaking of the devil...

"Nya ha ha!"

Make that the White Devil.

I sighed heavily.

"Nanoha!" I complained. "Couldn't you have picked a better way to wake me up?" The White Devil smiled innocently at me.

"I tried." She said simply. "But you were sleeping so soundly, that I figured it was the only way to do it. It's never failed to wake you up in the past."

"Gee, I wonder why?" I grumbled under my breath. Nanoha laughed as I rolled over onto my back so that I could stare upside down at Bardiche, who was sitting on my bedside table.

"Why didn't you wake me up Bardiche?" I asked, still eyeing Nanoha suspiciously.

"I made multiple attempts to wake you, Sir." He replied in his usual even tone.

"See?" Nanoha pointed out smugly. I glared darkly at her, before rounding on Bardiche.

"Next time try harder." I grunted as I hauled myself to my feet, trying to save any dignity that I had left. As I got up, I knocked the bed against the wall. The vibrations rattled the bookshelf, which was placed just over the bed. Just as I stood up one of the books decided to take a trip south.

Point-five of a second later, I found myself on the flat of my back with a sizable lump on the top of my head. Looks like the book in my dream had finally gotten it's revenge… why did we even put our bookshelf there anyway!?

"Fate-chan is out for the count!" Nanoha announced, clutching her stomach in her laughter. "And it's a one hit KO to the book!"

So much for my dignity.

Being very careful to not touch anything that wasn't bolted down, I slowly got to my feet again, grabbing the book on the way up.

'I guess this just isn't my day.' I mumbled to myself.

"Come on Fate-chan!" Nanoha called as she began rooting through our closet for her work uniform. "Today's the day we get a whole team of mages from Earth! I want you to come with me to meet them!"

How could I have forgotten? Nanoha had been excited about it all week. TSAB had recently become aware of three new types of magic. All three forms were earth based, and were not known anywhere else in the universe.

There was the HiME type. An ancient form of Japanese magic; which ritualistically manifested in twelve girls only once every three hundred years. Until it now had been kept hidden under wraps by a secret earth organization that had been trying to harness its power.

There was the Puella Magi type. A dark form of magic; where the newly awakened linker core fed directly off of the soul of the girls housing it. The discovery of this form also led to the discovery of the only mage, or 'Puella Magi' with divine-like abilities.

Lastly there was the Strike Witch type. A form of magic that relied on the (until now) exceedingly rare occasion where an animal familiar fuses with its master's previously weak linker core.

There had been a common denominator in the discovery of these three forms of magic, and it was also the reason why Section Six was being reformed. Nanoha was the only human alive to be classified by TSAB as a weapon of mass destruction. But the one who had brought these new forms of magic to the attention of TSAB was the only human alive to be classified as Lost Logia.

The whole thing is an unprecedented event that has everyone excited and terrified at the same time. As for me? The whole thing just gave me a headache… or maybe that was the giant lump on my head.

"Come On Fate-chan!" Nanoha's voice yelled up at me from downstairs. I snapped out of my daze, and realized that I must have been standing there like an idiot for quite awhile. "We're going to be late!"

"Coming!" I called back, taking the time to rub my sore head. I decided to take a quick peek at the title of the book that was the cause of my now pounding headache:

Sleeping Beauty.

… I hate irony.


Well there you have it, chapter 1. I hope you enjoyed it. I'll try to update as much as I can. I recently got a full time job, and I'm not used to the lack of free time. But the fact that I am actually posting this Fic (unlike the other ones that I've written) means that I am now honour bound to finish it. (Unlike the other ones I've written.) I've already started Chapter 2, and it's where the crossovers and OC's will start appearing.