Decided to make this a two parter. Now it's Deeks who needs Kensi's comfort.
She almost died today. To some it may not come as a surprise, because they are agents after all. Their lives are filled with impending danger, and they know- he knows, that everyday is a gift, because all it takes is one wrong move for it to become their last. Deeks thinks about it, and as he watches crystal waves meet sandy shores he digs into the pocket of his favorite and slightly torn jeans and pulls out his cell phone. He's had her number memorized for so long he doesn't even think about it, his fingers just know what buttons to press and its only seconds later that he has it pressed to his ear as the dial tone reverberates through his clouded mind. She picks up on the third ring, and at first her voice is hard to read. It's a mixture of annoyance and exhaustion and it makes him smile.
"Hey Fern." his own voice is quieter than usual, wary even because right now he doesn't know what to say, never really does if he thinks about it.
"What do you need Deeks?" This time he hears the old Kensi, the one who sounds genuinely pissed off by the sound of his voice, and a sigh of relief escapes his dry lips.
"Just needed to hear your voice Kens. Been a long day ya know?" She laughs, but it's guarded and quiet and it doesn't sound like her at all.
"I guess it has..." there's a pause and then Kensi speaks again, "where are you?" For a fraction of a second he considers not telling her, not because he doesn't want to see her, but because if he does he's not sure what will happen. But that fraction of a second is soon forgotten and Deeks finds himself giving her his location without so much as a blink of an eye.
"See you in ten," she says and as soon as the low moan of the dial tone echoes in his ear again he drops the phone in the sand and lies back, his hands folded behind his head as he watches the sky. The clouds are painted a mural of purple and orange, and instantly Deeks is taken back to days when he had nothing more than himself to worry about. Now though his days and nights are filled with a sense of worry and an undeniable ache in his gut as he wonders if Kensi made it home from the bar OK, or if she needs someone to talk to after an op goes south.
He closes his eyes and buries his bare toes in the sand, and after what seems like a lifetime later the sound of footsteps can be heard and a small smile tugs at his lips. He can feel her presence before he actually sees her and the air around him becomes clouded with the scent of raspberry shampoo and coffee. He cracks one clear blue eye open to meets her gaze, but his eyes are immediately drawn to the dark purple bruise on her jaw that she's tried to cover with concealer. Anger bubbles up inside of him and he sits up, bracing himself with his hands as he pretends to watch the shore.
"We need to stop meeting up like this," she says, shedding her black leather jacket and revealing a purple tank top. Deeks grins and glances at her.
"What if I don't want to?" he asks quietly, cringing when he realizes that maybe he shouldn't have said it. But Kensi merely shrugs her shoulders and stands before brushing the sand from her jeans and walking to the edge of the water, letting it wash over her toes as she let's out a content sigh. Deeks, for a moment, is mesmerized by the sight and sits with a smile plastered on his face. After a moment he gets up and walks to her side, letting the water wash over his own toes and he wonders why life can't always be this easy, this happy.
"You really had me scared today," he says softly. Kensi tugs her bottom lip between her teeth and nods slowly.
"I know. And I'm sorry. Sometimes I like to think I know what I'm doing. But sometimes.." she trails off with a short laugh and a pitiful shrug of her toned shoulders. Deeks laughs too, for the first time in what felt like a long time. He turns to Kensi and his hand reaches up, fingers gently reaching up and tracing angry the purple bruise. Kensi closes her eyes at the touch but doesn't pull back, doesn't hit him or threaten to rip his arm off and beat him with it, and that gives him hope. His hand retreats back to his side and Deeks feels that ache in his gut slowly ebb away.
"You know this isn't your fault right?" she asks, gesturing to her face and fixing him with a stern glare. Deeks opens his mouth but for some reason the words seem to be stuck in his throat. Kensi sighs and shakes her head but doesn't start the speech he had been waiting for. After a moment's hesitation she takes a step into the ocean, ignoring her now soaked jeans as she takes another and then another until the water has reached her thighs. Deeks is watching with an amused expression until a spray of salt water soaks his grey t-shirt and he can hear Kensi's loud and cackling laughter.
"Really Kens, that's how this is gonna go?" he's met with another symphony of laughter and he charges in the water after her. She splashes water at him and he sputters as the taste of salt fills his mouth and burns his nose and she laughs again. He wishes she would laugh more. For a while life feels like it should. He doesn't worry, doesn't feel the niggling of guilt in his mind because right now Kensi's happy and laughing and the sight is enough for him to forget everything else.
By now the sky has grown dark and they can see the glow of the city behind them as they lay on a blanket from the trunk of Kensi's car. A few stars twinkle faintly above them, and Kensi's eyes light up as she points to them, nudging his shoulder. Deeks smiles at her enthusiasm, reminding him of an overzealous child.
"Yeah?" Her voice is small, almost childlike as she turns her head and looks at him.
"Thanks." Kensi's eyebrows knit together in confusion, her mismatched eyes pointed narrowly at him.
"For what? Kicking your ass back there?" she asks, pointing to the waves that still gently rolled in and out with a low rumble. Deeks smiles, shakes his head and looks back at the sky.
"Thanks for being here. And thanks for not dying." he adds. Kensi smiles wryly and smacks his chest.
"You're an idiot," she mumbles, "but you're welcome."
Deeks smiles widely and looks at Kensi again. "Don't forget, I'm your idiot."