Because there's a lack for Sacred Stones love, I went ahead with it. Please do note that the events of the whole game will be completely exaggerated for the purpose of humor.

With that out of the way, I encourage all Bishop fans to read on, enjoy, and review.

~ Fire Emblem: The Sacred Comedy ~

Intro of Stupidity

The continent of Magvel was, at first sight, a peaceful place to live. But a close look at the different nations that ruled it would say otherwise. After getting know the gist of each one of the six nations, one could tell how messed up the place was.

The first nation was Renais, which was probably the only sane nation of the entire lot if it weren't for the fact that its citizens were very into gossip. The only piece of gossip that was infamous enough was the one about how incestuous the royal siblings of the castle were, even though they both denied their undying sibling love for each other. Their father shrugged the very thought away every time it was brought up to the point he didn't care. Soon enough, though, because of his overall denying attitude, Renais became filled with lots of incestuous couples behind the king's suspicions.

Up north from Renais was the nation of Frelia, home of the rabid Innes fangirls. The nickname of the nation became very well known due to the fact that all single (and engaged) young women were ridiculously infatuated by the prince's sight. Hell, even men wanted him. It wasn't crazy to think that the kingdom itself didn't care about itself but Innes' silver-ish hair. Woe would befall anybody who would usurp the prince's time. Last time he was indirectly distracted by a girl's call, the rest of the women in town creamed her. It was a gross scene that became engraved in Tana's mind.

To the east of Frelia lied the republic of Carcino, which was often looked down upon for not having a king that ruled it but rather grumpy old men that were thought to be perverts. The place felt like the backwater of the entirety of Magvell itself, but thankfully, the non-nation was a popular place due to its high commerce. Women would cry at seeing pretty jewels while men would cry at the price tag. For that fact alone, Carcino was also known as the land where wallets died in a blink of an eye.

Next to the right border of Carcino was the theocracy of Rausten. Just like Carcino, the other nations thought of Rausten as a place full of weirdos that held justice and love in high esteem over all things in the world. Their princess was a special case, as she would be probably the cheesiest thing Magvel has had ever seen in its long life. Her retainers were just as high on the clouds as she was. Many could say that the Darkling Woods was a much more important place than Rausten will ever be.

Further south of Rausten was the calm region of Jehanna, home of the biggest scandal. That said scandal was the disappearance of the queen's son, which was added to the oldest scandal that was the sudden death of the queen's husband, which was also added to the recent scandal that the queen thought she was a bad mom. Some have whispered that the king killed himself because he was envious of Frelia's popularity. I mean, who would live in a frickin' desert and make a palace there, anyway? Maybe the prince left because it sucked to live there in the middle of nowhere. Any sane person would do the same.

And last but not least, to the west of Jehanna and to the south of Renais resided the Grado Kingdom. The other nations considered Grado a damn good place to live. At least this was their previous train of thought until they heard some pretty dark rumors going about. One of them was that Prince Lyon was practicing dark, dark magic or something, but this was quickly discarded from their minds. Another rumor was that the king died and got resurrected, but this was also put into the wagon of rolling eyes. Yet another rumor was that Prince Lyon had some weird ass mood swings that were usually accompanied with some whispers about resurrecting the Demon King from children's fairy tales, but this one also got discarded. In short, the other nations still thought Grado was a good neighbor to Renais, but living there would be the scariest experience if the royal family got so many rumors like that.

Other than how screwed Magvel really looked like, the continent was a peaceful place to live, if there were people who would ignore all of its obscene flaws.

That all changed when Grado suddenly said to Renais, "Screw friendship, I want total conquest" and proceeded to declare a surprise war on everyone…

The insanity doesn't end here. Just wait till you see the main cast…

I encourage all strategists to review. Or else Rausten will be ruled by Flonne from Disgaea.