For those reading, just know this is set season 5 at the beginning, Emma isn't dating Peter but he is the new kid, Sean didn't move and Jay and Spinner still got kicked out for the shooting. Okay, enjoy!

Emma's point of view:

If you watched my life, it'd be one of those drama shows people loved, they wouldn't take it seriously and admit to how many fucked up things I've been through.

1; Jordon almost raping me.

2; My dad was in the mental institution

3; I ruined my teen years dating a guy with anger management.

4; I ruined my teen reputation because of the ravine.

5; got a gun pointed right at my face, purposely, I was first on the list.

6; I couldn't trust my own best friend around the guys I like.

7; I starved my body until I stopped breathing... say I'm fucked up beyond belief is an understatement, it was even worse than that. I was losing it. People think I'm still okay, still trying to be that over achiever but the truth is, it's a show, I'm busting my ass off trying to be that smart girl still and it's exhausting, I can't do it any longer or I'll break.


"Maybe I've already broke." Emma muttered, her emotionless eyes staring at the back of whoever sat in front of her.

Manny heard her during class mumble this and looked over, "What'd you say?" she whispered.

Emma snapped out of it and jumped when the bell rang.

"Nothing." Emma lied, drifting off as she stood up slowly and grabbed her books effortlessly, everyone else was racing out through the door.

Emma walked down the hallway with Manny as Peter passed them, the new guy. He invited them to his party, and they had met him by the city pool this summer, boy was cute, but Emma wasn't interested.

Way to smug for a boy like him.

Only certain bad boys could pull off what he tries too.

"Hey Emma." Greeted Sean, passing her and walking with Ellie.

Emma tried not to roll her eyes as Manny smirked, nudging Emma, "Ever since the shooting, Sean can't take his eyes off you. Well, lets admit it, he never could."

"Likes playing 'save the damsel in distress'" taunted Emma bitterly, "But he forgets how good he is with putting the damsel into so much stress."

Manny giggled beside her but not even Emma laughed, she hated the reputation Sean tried to pull, bad boy? More like misunderstood whiney teenager.

Grow up.

"I'm going to go to Peter's party this weekend, you?" Manny asked Emma, stopping at her locker.

"Nah." Emma said, leaning on the wall and gazing down at her books. Will probably study, study, study. Reputation to a hold remember?

Manny whined and complained, "Em! You never go out anymore!"

"I don't see the reason." Emma confirmed, looking back at Manny and shrugged.

Liberty came over to them and rolled her eyes, "Did you guys hear?" she questioned them both.

Manny turned from her opened locker and Emma tilted her head curiously at Liberty.

"Hear what?" Emma asked. Lib looked awfully upset.

"There letting Spinner back in." She scoffed and shook her head.

Manny made some remarks but all Emma could do was stare off into space. She didn't know if she was mad, or sad, or uncaring. She should be mad right? I mean, he and Jay were the reason Rick started a massacre shooting.

Or maybe the guy holding the gun started everything. Everybody has a choice...

"And Hogart?" Manny asked, snapping Emma out of it.

Liberty snickered, "No, think he just gave up, always was a ditcher anyway right? Loser."

Manny nodded frantically with Liberty and they looked at Emma, Emma blinked and nodded with them. Right! Ofcourse, they hated Jay even more because of what he did to Emma.

But then again, as much as Emma had her rivalry.. and a wierd confusing sexual vibe with him, there she was again thinking: everybody has a choice. Wasn't really just him, I mean STD yeah, but Emma should of been more cautious. Stupid girls lined up for bad guys like him, they always want to change a boy with a rough attitude and a promiscuous behavior, be his one and only.

Emma guessed, Jay wasn't the type of guy to ever change.

Back to that whole, boys trying to be bad boys, Jay didn't act, he was one. A lying, manipulative, sexy, rude, deceiving, witty bad boy.

"Ladies." Greeted their new principle as she walked by.

Daphne. Also new kid Peters mom.

Emma watched as she greeted another few students and then waved even to Emma's step dad, Snake, and then went into her office.

Wasn't someone already all cozy since Raditch's leave.

"I'll call you later?" Emma told Manny and waved to Liberty, leaving.

Emma got home and Spike was playing with Jack, Snake still wasn't home. Hmm. Wierd.

Emma dropped her coat and bag and while she tugged her shoes off she checked her last periods quiz, 60%

Emma sighed. She studied so much though..

Spike heard her and looked up, "honey, your home." She didn't give her bright and happy smile like she use to.

Emma mustered one and walked over, bending down infront of Jack to hold his hands as he stood up and smiled at her.

Spike frowned deeply, looking sadly at the ground, "Emma we need to talk."

It must of been serious, because Spike asked her to wait in the kitchen. She was gone a bit as Emma played with her hands in her seat at the dinner table and finally Spike came back, no Jack anymore.

Spike sat across from Emma.

Emma tapped patiently on the table, that's all life was, timing.

Emma glanced out the window, oh. It was getting dark already. Peter's party had probably already begun.


Emma whipped her head towards her mom whom sat across from her. Oh yeah, they were having a conversation?

Spike took in a deep breath, "I grabbed the news paper today." She says.

Emma raised an eyebrow. Well...good job there sprout! Emma tried not to crack a smile to her own joke.

She then saw her mom let a tear slip down her cheek.

"Mom?" whispered Emma, feeling terrible now. She hated when her mom or Jack ever felt sad, they were truly the only things in life she wanted to live for.

If it wasn't for them..ugh.. Emma didn't want to think of what she'd do.

Spike opened her mouth and had trouble letting it out, she shut it and bent over, grabbing that newspaper and slid it over to Emma.

Emma curiously looked at her mother then slowly took it from her hands.

The front cover.

In big bold letters it wrote: CHILD ONLINE RAPIST LET GO TODAY

A huge picture of Jordon was placed under the words, with paragraphs under it describing him and what he did, thankfully hiding every kids name that he's ever done stuff to.

Emma was stone cold, unreadable, it scared Spike who has never seen her daughter just slip away like that while sitting right infront of her.

Spikes hand shook as she covered her mouth and then reached out for Emma's hand, "Baby talk to me." She cried and Emma yanked her hand away from her

Emma glared at Spike through hot tears, her whole body shaking, nevermind just a hand.

"How long have you known!" Emma exclaimed, letting the tears fall down hard.

Spike closed her eyes, "Emma it just got into the newspaper-"


"Detective Riley gave us a call a week ago, we didn't know how to tell you. He said Jordon had been in jail before you for 15 years, he served the other sentences for kids he's hurt but since he didn't get far enough with you, they could only hold him for 5 more years."

Emma stood up from the table quickly, her chair moving back and even falling. She looked at her mother like she didn't even know who she was anymore.

"You kept this away from me for a week!"

"EMMA!" Spike cried, but the blonde took off, grabbing her coat again and shoes, running out and slamming the door behind her.

Spike jumped from the roughness.