Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.
Dedicated to askmihawk and ask-akagami-no-shanks for their cuteness.
Shanks peered out from his apartment window. It took a few struggling tugs and saliva lubricated hands to get it open. He never used it before, but the whole apartment building was still two years old: a brand new baby. Maybe the construction workers slacked off.
He was curious because he heard a sound of a large truck. His room was located right above the lobby, so he could get a glimpse of the people. However, it could get a bit noisy at times. He squinted downward and it was a very large moving truck.
Hou.. .Shanks mused, A rich one's moving in.
He was starting to get curious, so he finished brushing his teeth, changed in a cleanest outfit he could salvage, and headed out. The route down the hallway and to the lobby was quiet. Morning had just begun, so families, couples, and singles were still sleeping. Except Shanks the Single, of course.
The lobby was bustling with moving men. There were boxes everywhere with numbers labeled on the side. Shanks glanced at the number and his eyes lit up. The new guy was going to live right next door to his. Well, this was going to be interesting. It has been a while since he had a neighbor; the last one ran away one night from the piling debt.
He stepped outside as if he was just going to check his mailbox, and he happened to spot one of the family members. Upon the sight, the corners of Shanks' mouth began to drool. This time, the new family members were going to be irresistibly beautiful neighbors. The boy was cute!
It was a young boy around in his early teens. His hair was short and a rare shade of green (maybe the kid dyed it?). He looked a little tired, but anyone who drove from afar would be feeling sleepy. He wore loose clothing and he held a small backpack. Shanks approached the young boy with a friendly smile on his face. The boy caught the presence, and he turned around.
"Hello." Shanks started.
"Hello." The young boy replied quietly. The kid voice was high; he still didn't enter puberty yet. The boy's height only reached to Shanks' shoulder.
"I'm Shanks Akagami. What's your name?"
Draquille...? Shanks raised an eye. It was an unfamiliar name, so it triggered a long lost memory. He knew that name, but where? He couldn't remember, so Shanks continued along with their conversation.
"Are you going to move here?"
Zoro hugged the backpack close to his chest, "Yeah..."
"I think you're going to be new neighbor. Nice to meet you."
He held out his hand, but Zoro suddenly looked over his shoulder. Shanks perked his attention also because he heard a voice.
"Who are you talking to Zoro?"
"Our new neighbor."
Shanks saw a larger man approach them, and the red haired man couldn't believe his eyes. He jumped up, straightening his back, and tried to produce a sound. Nothing came out. The other man saw Shanks, and he also made a reaction except his was more subtle. A twitch of his eyebrow was all he did. The rest of the man's sharp, handsome features remained in place.
"...Akagami..." The other muttered under his breath.
Shanks clamped his mouth shut when he heard the other say his name. His whole body was shaking from his thumping heart. The last time they met was in high school and that was nearly twenty years ago. It's been years since he saw him, but he hadn't changed. Maybe he had gotten even more beautiful from age. Like aged wine, Shanks couldn't wait to taste him. Shanks' lips spread open into a sunlight like smile.
Zoro stared at the older men in peaceful silence. His father merely covered his face with his hand.
Shanks followed his old friend all the way to their room. The room was filled with grand furniture and unopened boxes. Zoro looked like he wanted to see his new room, but he was curious of the older men's conversations.
"Oh man...long time no see Mipo!"
"You are the last man I wanted to see."
"Mipo! You're cold! You know you don't mean that!"
"Yes I do. Every single syllable."
"Hey," Shanks drew his attention onto Zoro, "how'd you get this kid? I didn't know you liked little boys."
"I'm not a pervert like you." The dark haired man replied sharply, "He's my son."
"S-Son?" Shanks gasped out loud from shock, "W-Wait...you had a girlfriend? When?"
"A few years after I graduated from college. We married a few months later."
"But we divorced just recently. I have my son while she has our daughter-"
"You have a daughter too?" Shanks' head felt light headed from the sudden intake of information. His old friend, Mihawk Duraquille, married, had two kids, and then divorced...?
"But I thought you were gay!"
"I was straight until I met you Akagami."Mihawk snapped, "We had countless fights because she found out about my sexuality."
"Aww...so I made you bi. I feel proud..." Shanks smiled at Zoro, "Does your kids know you're bi?"
"We needed to tell them the reason of our divorce."
"Oh...alright." Shanks patted a hand on Zoro's shoulder, "So kid, how many boys have you kissed?"
Zoro frowned, "I never heard anyone ask me that before..."
"Akagami, Zoro isn't gay."
"Awwwww, really?" Shanks looked like he was about to cry, "You're only for the girls!" Mihawk narrowed his eyes at Shanks' stupidity. Zoro's little lips pulled into a straight line. However, the young boy shook his head.
"I...I never kissed any girls either."
"Oh! So there's still a chance to convert you!"
"Akagami!" Mihawk struck Shanks by the back of the head, "Are you attempting to make my family homosexual?"
"Ow! Mipo! That hurt!" Shanks pouted in hopes that Mihawk would feel sorry, but the other man didn't falter.
Mihawk cast his eyes on his son, "He's asexual."
"What...?" Shanks rubbed the back of his head, "Does that mean he has no interest in anyone?"
"The last time I've ever heard you say a correct answer was back in middle school."
"Mipo, you can be really mean...it's been years! Can you smile for me?" Mihawk did not make an expression. Rather he began to frown. Shanks huffed. "Fine, if you're going to be stubborn, I'm going to take your son and make him gay!"
Mihawk reached out his arms, but Shanks already had his arms around Zoro and whirled out the room. The red haired man rushed into one of the rooms and closed the door right before Mihawk reached it. There was the banging of the door and the angry racket of the doorknob, but the door was locked.
Shanks turned and saw that Mihawk's son had a small smile on his face.
"What are you smiling about?"
When Shanks asked, Zoro snapped out from whatever reverie he was in. The kid blushed because he was caught smiling, and he scowled to wear it off. However, the sneer disappeared and Zoro stared toward the loud door.
"I've never seen Dad talk that much before..."
"Really?" At first Shanks thought Mihawk had lost interest in him, but when he heard Zoro's comment he felt better.
Zoro nodded, "He was always silent. Never talked to Mom like that."
Shanks grinned, "Yes! I still might have a chance!" Gosh Mipo, acting so sour! He should act more honest and sweet to me! "So kid, how about you?"
"Do you like me?"
Zoro shrugged, but he smiled again, "If Dad acts like that...I don't mind."
Shanks chuckled, but his expression had a sly undertone, "Oh, I wasn't talking about that little kid-"
Before he could get his hands in all the inappropriate places, the door fell down with a loud snap. Large fragments of the door flew across the room. Some soared past Shanks' face and nearly tore his face. On the other side, Mihawk was glowering. In his hands, his treasured swords were unsheathed and the cause if the defeated door.
"May I ask what you were going to do with Zoro?"
Shanks waved his hands around to prove his innocence, "No Mipo! Believe me! You'll always be my first and only love-!"
"Shut up and die Akagami!"
Shanks was chased out of their room in less than a minute. When Mihawk returned, he found Zoro picking up the door pieces and trying to fit it like a jigsaw puzzle.
"Sorry about you room Zoro." Mihawk brushed his hair back and sighed, "I don't know what has happened to me..."
"That's 'love,' right Dad?"
Mihawk pulled down a frown. He didn't want to admit it, but his asexual son was right. The pervert red head always left him confused, frustrated, and disheveled in the head. Long ago, his body ended up in the same fate also.
"Akagami is our neighbor?" Mihawk let out a chuckle, "How twisted is fate?"
"Hey..." Mihawk pulled his hands off his face to look at his son appropriately, "...you laughed..."
Mihawk stared at his son, and then a faint blush formed on their faces. Delaying a second or two, they both smiled too.
The Duraquille Family didn't have a chance to relax for the next day Shanks came to visit. He also came in with a surprise.
"You're going to do what?" Mihawk asked, nearly breaking the mug in his hands. Zoro eyed the mug to make sure that the recently brewed hot coffee would not spill on his father's hands.
"I'm going to live with you guys!" Shanks announced proudly, "And no, you can't kick me out because I already moved out! I'm without a home, so you must let me live with you!"
"Go live in the streets and starve to death."
"Mipo, why must you be so mean! Zoro! Help me!"
"Why would you believe my son will help you?"
Zoro smiled sheepishly, "H-He can have the room between ours Dad."
"Zoro! You are a life saver!" Shanks ran over and gave the middle schooler a strong hug, "I'll promise I won't do anything bad! Oh, I'll even help you share the rent." Shanks added the last bit along with a handsome smile. Mihawk frowned, but there was a rare shade of pink on Mihawk's face. Zoro even freaked out to see his father blush.
"Oh yeah! So, who's the daddy-!"
"No one is going to be the mom."
"That's no fun!" Shanks pouted, but he never gave up. He brought up a smile again, "I knew you'll let me live, so I added my name on the front door."
Mihawk ran to the front to see the added name. Shanks and Zoro followed after while smiling to each other. When the two Duraquilles saw the name plate, they stared at it in confusion.
"'Abiho'?" Zoro cocked his head to the side, "What does that mean?"
Shanks grinned, "It's an abbreviation of Asexual BIsexual and HOmosexual! We are the Abiho Family!" The red head chuckled while Mihawk blanched. Shanks knelt down to look face-to-face with Zoro, "Ah, but it might become 'Hobiho' if I succeed in making you homo."
Shanks got hit in the face with the back of Mihawk's hand, and the poor man did not wake up until thirty minutes later. However, when he did wake up, he was smiling from ear to ear when he saw the name plate hadn't changed.
To (may)be Continued
I'll update whimsically.