Childhood Dreams

By Perfect Soldier 01



Chapter 1: Memories of Pain



Fujin's POV

The light wind blew through my short silver hair as I ran. The tears that were forming in my red eyes were quickly blown down my red cheeks. I didn't know where I was going, but I just had to get away from the huge, lumbering creature that was behind me. I could hear her loud thundering footsteps following my own small frantic pathway. The leaves and dense soil underfoot were crushed into foot shaped ditches as we ran deeper and deeper into the village forest.

"Fujin! Come back here this instant! You can't run away from me!" My mother's overpowering voice shouted from not far behind me. I didn't even think about turning back, I only ran faster. I wouldn't be caught again and be beaten again...for something I didn't do.

My eyes stung from the salty tears that were streaming down my face. I cried silently as I ran, knowing that my tears would only bring my 'mother' to more anger and determination to catch me. She loathed the weakness that I possessed being a child. I knew that she would eventually catch me; she always did, and always left me sore and even weaker afterwards.

'It's always the same thing. I never do anything and she blames it on me.' I thought to myself, now angry as well as frightened. I glanced over my shoulder slightly to look at the monster chasing me. Her tall, broad shoulders made her head seemed dwarfed. Her large hands were outstretched hands were aimed in my direction, one holding her crimson pinwheel poised and ready to fire. The pearl white talons of the pinwheel shined brighter in the sunshine that peeped through the trees, watching the onslaught of mother and child. The long sharp blades sparkled for a second before the light was lost in the green darkness of the forest. The blinding whiteness of the blades struck my eyes with another beam of bright light as the sun re entered the small gaps of the canopy over head. The godly brightness was so pure and unstained that I had to look away. It made it seem as though the gods favoured what my mother was doing, ignoring the under dog, and cheering the beast on to victory.

I guess they did favour her. At that moment as I turned my head back to the leaf carpet I was running on, a stray root from a near by tree caught my foot and wedged it in it's hole. I felt myself flip over and fall through the air. Everything happened in slow motion as my feet came over my head. I faced my mother except the almighty image was upside down. I saw her unleash her hazed red pinwheel in the light of the sun. I saw the forever changing colours of the blades spin round and round in a circle as the talons of demise slowly drove themselves towards my face. I could do nothing but let everything happen. I was too scared to move my head out of the path of the death spinning blades as I fell head over heels through the air.

The blades dug themselves into the middle of my face. I screamed out in pain as the blades spun against my face. I thought I'd die at that moment as the pinwheel struck my left eye. I felt the flesh of my face being churned around and around by the forever spinning blades of my mother's pinwheel. Red blood streamed down my face merging all the tributaries from the deep wound.

Suddenly everything seemed to return to its normal speed and I hit the hard ground of the forest, blood dripping from my face. I lay there, twisted on another root motionless for the pain was too much to bear. With the last ounce of strength I had left I raised my head and still saw my mother pounding towards me, still shouting. The pinwheel had returned to her hand, and I saw her about to throw the fatal weapon once more.

******

A scream echoed through the small Deling city apartment. I opened my one eye and sat bolt upright in my bed. I raised my hand to my black eye patch, and sighed.

'Only a dream.' I thought thankfully, but I still felt tears forming in my eye. I let them run slowly down my shaking face as nobody was. I brought my head down and rested it on my bent knees as I began to cry more. Why did that happen? Who is up there that is convinced I should suffer? "Why am I always grasped in the hand of my mother, always watched and punished?!" I shouted out. I didn't realise I said anything until a voice suddenly called my name through the thin wall of the apartment.

"Fujin? You ok?" I jumped suddenly, but didn't reply and pretended to be asleep. I didn't want to bother my roommate at this hour. I glanced at the clock as I sighed again, tears still lingering on my cheeks.

'1.00 am.' I wiped the small sweat beads that had formed on my forehead and turned to go back to sleep, but I jumped up again as I heard a knock on my door. I sat up and called that entrance was permitted. A tall blonde-haired man stepped through the door. His red scar lay diagonally across his face. I was taken aback slightly from the fact that Seifer wasn't wearing a shirt, and I hid my red face in my covers. My vision was diverted up again as his voice spoke again.

"Fujin? What's wrong?"

"Nothing." I said.

"Well something must be up. You just screamed!" He argued back.

"Nothing!" I raised my voice slightly.

"Fujin...you don't make this any easier by talking like that."

"Fine..." I growled in defeat.

"So what's wrong?" he came and sat down beside me and looked me directly in the eye. I felt slightly nervous but I knew that I could talk to him.

"Nightmare..." I said quietly. I knew what he'd say now.

"Another one? Fujin...this is the third one you've had this week..." I nodded.

******

Seifer's POV

'Another nightmare? Fujin... There isn't anything I can do to help you...although I want to do everything possible to stop you having these dreams. Why'd you have to experience something so horrible? I don't really know what to say.Anything I say might make it worse.but all I want is for Fujin to be happy.

I looked at the silver-haired girl beside me. She nodded at my question. Another dream about her crazy mother. She explained further without my asking, which I was surprised about. Usually she didn't say anything unless spoken to. Fujin never ceases to amaze me though.

"This one...this one was so much more...real..." I could see that she had been crying already form the tear marks on her cheeks, but I could see more tears forming in her red eye as she spoke. Her voice wavered and faltered on some word, but she continued to speak. "I felt it...I felt the pinwheel...dig into my face and...and..." Fujin couldn't finish her sentence. She burst into tears before I told her to stop talking. I hated to see her like this. I hated to see her so upset when there was nothing I could do.

I reached out towards the crying girl and pulled her close, hoping and praying that my instinct was right. She made no resistance as I pulled her into a hug. Fujin let out her tears on my shoulder and accepted my act of kindness. I whispered small words of comfort into her ear, although something was telling me to pull back. I myself didn't know what had quite come over me, but it felt.good for me as well as the girl gently crying on my bare shoulder.

We stayed close together in comfortable silence until Fujin's tears subsided. She pulled out of my embrace and turned her head. I could hear her cursing herself, although I couldn't hear what she was saying.

"Fujin...don't say that. It's normal," her head turned to face me. "Don't be angry...we've all been through some painful experiences, some a little more than others, but you've always got friends who care for you right?" 'Where on earth did that come from?' I thought. 'What's going on? Why am I acting like this?'

Fujin's POV

I nodded in approval of his words of comfort. He could be pretty kind to people when he wanted to. A small smile crept onto my lips. But the next thing he did was very unexpected. My barriers rose up again as he reached out towards my face. His hand stopped at my left cheek as he adjusted his position. His other hand came up around the other side of my face and I felt my eye patch being moved up off my face. My own hand quickly caught his wrist in a protective manner. I shock my head, and pleading with him not to remove my eye-patch. I didn't want him to see the state of my face that lay under the protective black material. But something in his eyes made me feel safe. His eyes lowered my walls of fear as I relaxed my grip on his wrist and allowed him to continue. I casted my eyes downwards to avoid his gaze.

Seifer's POV

I didn't know what I was doing. My curiosity had got the better of me. I had never known what Fujin was hiding underneath her eye patch, but from what she had told me about her nightmares, I began to form a clearly picture of what her life had been like.

'She must have been totally terrified as a child,' I thought. 'Always living in fear of what her mother might do to her. No wonder she just turned up that day at Balamb...'

I gently removed her black eye patch off of her tear-stricken face and prevented myself from looking too shocked at what I saw. Her whole eye had been sealed off from the world by various straight and zigzagging red scars. As I looked closer I could see scars down that extended those at her eye, but had healed and blended in with her natural skin colour. I had never noticed them before. I ran my finger gently across her childhood wound. I looked into her other flame red eye for any sign of pain; but no change in her eyes became evident. My fingers brushed her scars as softly as possible. I drew back and looked at the silver haired girl that sat in front of me. I ran a finger over my own scar, thinking back to the pain that I had received.

"Fuu..." her head turned as I called part of her name. I pulled her into another embrace, as I saw more tears arrive in her eyes waiting to be dropped. I didn't know why I did it, but I felt this was the only way of saying sorry. I was sorry that she had to live through such a painful experience, sorry that I wasn't there to protect her, and sorry for not saying something earlier. I felt her react to my embrace as her hands came around my neck. She cried softly on my shoulder as before. I think she understood what I meant, but as I held her while she cried, my guilt of being so un-emotionally tarnished rose up within me. Poor Fujin had been through so much pain and torture. I just didn't really know how to react to something like that. All I could do was gently rub her back easing the tears.

But there was still something at the back of my mind saying to stop being so sensitive, so emotional and so...unlike my normal self. I ignored it as best I could, but it eventually won over. I pulled back and got up to leave. I turned round to see Fujin still sitting upright in her bed as she replaced her eye patch. I walked over to her as she lay back down to go to sleep. I pulled up the cover over her still slightly shaking body and brushed a strand of silver hair that had fallen into her face. I laid my hand on her shoulder, silently telling her to hang in there. She smiled up at me, then closed her eyes and slowly drifted back off to sleep.

I didn't know what over came me at that moment, but I leaned down and kissed her forehead gently. Fujin shifted in her sleep slightly but didn't wake up. I straightened myself up and smiled as I walked out of her room and back to my own. Although I was smiling, I knew that some explaining of what just happened would be needed in the morning. Luckily Rajin won't be back from his night shift till late afternoon, so I'll still had quite a bit of time left to talk to Fujin. I just hoped that I wouldn't blurt that something that I've wanted to tell her...