Disclaimer: Don't own Marvel, or anything in particular. I own my goldfish, but they're not here so that doesn't particularly count.

Author's Note: This was based off a prompt by gruvvulousglove on Tumblr. Was gonna be a one shot but then I got ideas, and started thinking... so hopefully I don't fail horrendously. And Loki doesn't have braces. I just couldn't do it to him. That is all. Enjoy.

Floppy disk.

It's a floppy disk, Loki thought to himself as he opened his locker, but rather than chewing off her head, Loki smiled politely at his neighbor and merely nodded.

"Cool," she says as she pops her gum for what must be the millionth time that morning. Her attention was quickly deviated by her friend who Loki had been calling "Bimbo" since September. His neighbor is "Chew, Pop, Repeat", respectively.

Yeah, it's November and he still doesn't know their names, but as far as Loki can tell he doesn't need to know. And, if he plays his cards right, he never will. That way, twenty five years from now, when he gets his invite to their class reunion he can laugh at it hysterically and tear it into tiny little pieces and feed it to a homeless guy without any sort of remorse. Loki was looking forward to that.

Loki knew he shouldn't be too upset. His hypotamoose t-shirt was barely the talk of his math class, and no one but his A.P. Lang teacher had seen MacGyver and Buck Rogers and appreciated his effort. He should have known people wouldn't know it was a floppy disk.

But a bar code? These kids were beneath him.

Loki grabbed a notebook and stuffed it into his backpack. It was going to be a long day. He could feel it in his bones.

"Is it just me, or are your t-shirts getting more obscure?"

Loki slammed his locker shut to reveal Tony Stark leaning against the lockers, sunglasses in place and a smirk plastered on his face. "What do you think of mine?" He asked, showing off his "Future Evil Ex" shirt.

Loki snorted. "What do you want, Stark?"

Tony merely smiled his dazzling, shit-eating grin and chuckled, as if Loki was the most amusing person in the world. For all Loki knew, he probably was. "Maybe this is why you don't have any friends."

"Perhaps," Loki huffed, "I don't want any." He slung his backpack over his shoulder and walked away, leaving Tony behind.

He marched right up to his first class, but he was early and the door was locked. Of course. He slunk down against the wall and decided to wait it out.

Not that he had a choice.

Loki closed his eyes and took deep breaths. In, out, in, out. Despite the calming effect his breathing exercises were supposed to have, Loki was still bothered.

Stupid Stark, he thought to himself. Just about every day Tony made a comment about his t-shirts. Loki refused to wear his red shirt after Tony attempted to find ways to kill him with "All red shirts die" as a petty excuse.

Loki was pretty sure Tony had never seen a single episode of Star Trek. He probably looked it up on his Stark phone between classes.

Loki growled under his breath. Stupid Stark! Just because his father was the Howard Stark of Stark Industries was no excuse to terrorize him. So what if Loki spent his time watching movies and reading science fiction. Maybe he could whistle the Doctor Who theme in perfect pitch and collected vinyl. Perhaps Loki didn't have any friends, but that was no excuse for Tony Stark to mock his t-shirts.

His t-shirts were cool.